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Collegeport Information
January, 1927 |
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Collegeport, Texas, Jan. 6—With the coming of the New Year came 150 people together at the Community House to eat New Year’s dinner together as has been done every year for 18 years at this place. The dinner was in charge of the ladies of the community and directed by the Social and Finance Committee of the Woman’s Union. Mrs. Roy Nelson headed the committee. In the absence of Rev. H. Paul Janes, pastor of First Church of Collegeport, who is assisting in a special series of services at Garwood, Texas, Rev. Mr. Stephens, pastor of the First Christian Church of El Campo, will speak Sunday morning and evening at Collegeport and Sunday afternoon at Citrus Grove. Miss Margaret Holsworth, who is teaching in the Chicago schools returned to her work last week, after a weeks visit with her family here. With her returned Miss Elsie Thomen who spent the Fall in the Holsworth home. Miss Thomen is a Chicagoan. Mrs. H. Paul Janes is visiting with her mother in Houston. Mr. and Mrs. S. B. Sims returned last Monday evening from a trip thru’ the north and east.
Palacios Beacon, January 6, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
Dr. Filmer Northrup, professor of philosophy at Yale, says, "Relatively is the key in the riddle of life, that it opens the way to a comprehension of God and in a merger of science and religion." Isn't this plain and understandable? I know an easier way. Take a grain of corn, plant it in good soil, watch it sprout, one coming up in the sun and the other going down into the earth. Watch it develop, put on the ear and mature the corn. On a curtain in a Chicago theater for years appeared this inscription. "First the blade, then the ear, then the full corn in the ear." This is the way to know God and using this method no one need worry about relatively.
George Serrill in his "ad" says that he wants "your good will." Wonder how many of us know what good will is. The United States Supreme Court says, ”Good will is the disposition of the pleased customer to return in the place where he has been well treated." This court has given the public many good things but this is one of the best. Hope George sends me another beautiful calendar for 1927.
Just had a guest for a day, a lady from Houston, intelligent, able to discuss state and national topics, soft spoken, snappy black eyes. Thinks she will move to Collegeport.
The New Year started off fine for us. Our registered cow presented us with a fine heifer calf. Nineteen-twenty-seven looks good to us.
The eighteenth annual New Year's community dinner was held Saturday and as usual about 200 mingled together, ate and drank to the health of the baby, 1927. Turkey, fried chicken, chicken pie, roast beef, roast veal, roast pork, baked ham and salads, vegetables, pies and cakes galore. And such coffee. Thank Mrs. Roy Nelson for that. When we have these dinners if one wishes to see Mrs. Nelson one must go into the kitchen. Lots of women do the fancy outside work, but Mrs. Roy Nelson works unseen and unthanked except by a few who know.
That miserable wretch, my wife, has indulged her appetite for quail and much to my disgust appeared to be happy as she crunched the bones of the little bird. Says she, in order to ease her conscience, "If we had 50 hens running around we would kill one for our table, then why not kill a few quail?" She smiles a cannibalistic smile as she continues to crunch the bones. What can a man do with such a woman?
One of our young ladies objects to me using her as the subject of some of my thoughts. She will have no further opportunity to object. I shall still think but will refrain from writing.
The Collegeport Industrial League voted in nine new members last meeting, let a contract for a cement sidewalk for the Woman's Club, joined the Gulf Coast Good Roads Association and worked over several other "little things."
The fig orchards have been deserted since Sims went away but he will be back in a few days and then things will hum again. Sims is a working fool and never knows when to quit. No whistle blows for him.
Met a young girl the other day and gave her a cheerful "good morning." She looked at me a moment and gave no response so I repeated "good morning" and she replied, "hello." Bishop Middleton said, "Virtue itself offends when coupled with forbidding manners." "But what the hell, Bill, What the hell?" This is the way of the present youth.
F. L. Hall has turned weather prophet and say[s], "Three fogs, then rain." Hope it will be a warm rain. "Naught cared this body for wind or weather when youth and I lived in 't together."--Coleridge.
In a few days Mr. Lull will drive the gold spike, celebrating the arrival of the S. P. Lines in Edinburgh. Mr. Scott drove the silver spike and it's too bad he could not live to use the sledge on the gold one. With his death there passed a man full of kindness, brotherly love, a wholesome soul, who, coming from the ranks never forgot the worker. Why does God take such men and allow degenerates to live and multiply?
Mr. Fred Goff says, "I have been here three years and have no desire to go back North except to visit. No more cold weather for me." Good sense.
Don’t see how the farmer will receive much benefit from the Bankers Cotton Corporation recently organized. Any cotton firm extends the same facility and at less cost. Some merchants still advertise "Our prices are right." If this is true why not make them public? Space is too valuable to waste and every word should hit the bull's eye. Prices talk.
The holidays being over suppose we will have no more six or eight-page Tribunes until next December. At that time advertisers will have another spasm. Ample space, in same location, very well told with simple words always pays. Although some people do not like the publisher or what he prints in the editorial column, everyone should read the Trib. It is a necessity to an ambitious village. Excuse me, I meant city. Wonder when John Sutherland will run for mayor again. The Gulf Coast Good Roads Association, in a newspaper statement, requests people to send their membership applications to the county vice president. In my opinion the vice president will not be burdened with applications. The only way to secure them is to go after them. Personal solicitation will do the business. George Culver, the vice president for Matagorda County, is busy digging shell, so don't bother him with your 25c per week.
Girl opens door of the postoffice and asks. "Any mail for me?" Seth feels like saying, "____," but he refrains and says, "Who is me?" She replies, "the Smiths and Browns.” "No mail for either." "Are you sure?" "Yes." "They ain't no package, be they?" "No." "Well they ought to be a package for it was done sent two days ago." And we wonder why the postmaster is accused of being cross at times. Talk about Job. If Seth Corse is not a modern Job, do not know where to find one.
Secretary Mellon is right in his ruling that no more poison shall be introduced into alcohol. Better have two drunks than one dead man. I have many a good laugh when I think of how some of the Bay City merchants sob over the business that goes to mail order houses. At the same time some of them send out of town for printing and buy bread and baker's goods in Houston. "Consistency, thou art a jewel." I'll bet that the local bakers would be glad to have this trade. Makes me think thoughts.
The Daily Tribune, Thursday, January 6, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
FORGET THEE? "Forget thee?" "If to dream by night, and must on thee by day, If all the worship, deep and wild, a poet's heart can pay, If prayers in absence breathed for thee to heaven's protecting power, If winged thoughts that flit to thee--a thousand in an hour, If busy Fancy blending thee with all my future lot,-- If this thou callest 'forgetting,' thou indeed shalt be forgot." --John Moultrie.
How soon we forget. Only yesterday Commander Landsdown went to his death in the Shenandoah. Now comes the announcement that his widow is to taking on another. Forget thee? Only a few weeks ago the pages of the Southwest were filled from front to back with eulogies of Harry Haines and how he would sweep the State for governor. In the issue for January the name of Haines appears only once and that in small type at the head of a column tabulating the votes by counties.
Forget thee? "How fleet the works of man." It is our nature to forget and perhaps 'tis best that we can forget but there are things in this life that to forget seems almost sacrifice. Say fellows. If your wife says she will never marry again put it in the bunk division. My wife, miserable wretch, has often told me the "old, old story," but in my opinion she will have the flag out inside six weeks. They simply can not get along without a man. Forget thee? It is not thus with men. Constancy is bred in our bone and although we do love to climb the fence and sniff the roses in the other garden, there is never but one woman and that's the one we are with at the moment? Huh? Forget thee? Never. How can I forget that we are to have a causeway across the bay when weekly I receive a letter from R. G. Hobbs, secretary of the Fig Orchards Company, informing me of the plans being made for building this important link with the Palacios hard road. Not one grain of sand will I place in his way. We need and must have good transportation between Collegeport and a first class road connecting with, not only Palacios, but with Bay City. My thought just now is that Palacios is copping off a large trade which the Bay City merchants lose because of their apparently negative attitude. The post office records show that $30,000 goes from this burg each year for mail orders. Bay City can have some of this if they will be go-getters, instead of sitting-waiters. Come on Cashway, T. J. Clark, D. P. Moore, Simon Brothers. Get busy, follow up your advertising. The fruit is here ready to pluck. This year of our Lord one thousand nine hundred and twenty-seven has so far been good to me. Heard a new bleat and was obliged to stop my "thoughts" while I investigated. Found the bleat was made by another calf. Two fine calves in seven days. If they keep coming at this rate I will have to time to "thought." The new cement sidewalk of the Woman's Club is ready for use, thanks to the efficient work of L. E. Liggett, contractor for the Collegeport Industrial League. Looks fine, walks easy and the women, God bless them, are tickled. Mrs. Frank King, the president, is so well pleased that she threatened to stop bobbing her hair. She is a hard and efficient worker in civic affairs and has the hearty thanks of all who are striving to make this burg just a little bit better. A few weeks ago writing "Thoughts" I wrote "wonder what Oscar Odd thinks of this dope." Don't worry, Oscar, imitation is the sincerest flattery." Now comes Robert Quillan, in Quillan Quips, with this "imitation is also the most annoying form of flattery." Howling cats" but don't it beat the band the way some folks take the joy out of life? One bright spot and that is The Tribune is widely read. Did not know until today that Quillan was a subscriber. Will use more caution in the future. We have enjoyed two weeks of "dulce" days and dulcier nights and now comes the weather pessimist and says, "The radio reports a cold, wet norther." How joy flies. We on the east side of the bay are favored with magnificent sunsets. Only when the days are short and the sun sets far south do we have these views. Then the sun sets as a globe of opal gold, the golden glow ascending into the sky after the sun has sunk below the waves that sparkle and scintillate. For a moment iridescent rays ascend to heaven and they seem to whisper of a fair day on the morrow. Darkness comes, the new moon hangs high in the sky, the stars, like commercial blue white diamonds begin to blaze and night with rest comes to Matagorda Bay. Wonderful pictures God provides for us poor mortals. Human hands can not paint the picture. Since Carey Smith took over The Tribune I have sent him miles of dope and have received many words and letters of appreciation but these "Thoughts" have brought to me the most appreciative words from many miles away. The words that I value most came from Mrs. Cartwright of Bay City whose husband is confined to his room. She says, "He can hardly wait until the issue comes to him and as soon as the paper is received I read it to him." If my poor efforts, bring brightness to one shut in, am I not well repaid for the time spent in thinking these thoughts? Just received a big box from my son and among the many things was a big hunk of Rochefort cheese and a box of Bent's water crackers. As I sniffed the cheese memories floated before me and I saw myself seated across a table from my sweetheart with her hand in mine. No blaring jazz to break the spell, soft lights, light stepping waiters, always absent but always present, and as I told the story she devoured partridge breast. Isn't that like a woman? The cheese, crackers then cafe demi-tasse with cognac to burn on the sugar. Ah! "make me a boy again, just for tonight." Those were the days of Rectors, Kingsleys, The Roma, Madam Galle, St. Hubert's Inn, Repetto's, De Johnes. I knew them well and in my time bought many a shingle for their roofs. This is the day of the flappper, the lounge lizzard, the harsh, strident jazz, the dance hound and everything calculated to discourage romance. Listen! What was that? It sounded like a little bleat. It is another calf. Three in a week. The gods are sure good to me so far this year. Can't think more thoughts this week. Too many calves to teach to drink.
Matagorda County Tribune, January 14, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp
"I hold the world but as the world, Gratiano; A stage, where every man must play a part, And mine a sad one." --Shakespeare's Merchant of Venice, Act I, Scene 1.
When I was a boy my father had charge of the town "Opry House" and we sold tickets and thus I came into contact with strolling troupes as they visited our town. Many a time I wanted to "join out" but the opportunity never came until A. O. Miller struck the town. A. O. was a remarkable man, a finished and polished actor but a heavy drinker and this vice kept him a small town actor and finally caused his death. In his company was his wife, a beautiful, intelligent and cultured woman with wonderful ability; his two daughters, Helen and Stella. These girls were fine types of young actresses, clean and sweet and I fell hard for Stella and unknown to my father "joined out." We played Rip Van Winkle and Will Carleton's Over the Hills to the Poor House. In the former I was Rip's son and Stella was the daughter and thus I was closely associated with the one girl in all the world. In the scene where Rip returns we were playing on the green in front of Dedrich's house. The latter had married Rip's wife. I thought it would add to the effect if we danced and asked A. O. Miller if it would not be an improvement. He replied, "I think if you and Stella follow the script and business you will do all that is necessary." I wanted to have the chance to put my arms around her but A. O. was a wise bird. When we played in my home town I appeared as son John in Over the Hills and I came on stage with a cigar in my mouth. Tobacco was taboo in my father's family and when my dad saw me with the cigar he yanked me from the boards and my career as an actor came to an end. He claimed that this act saved me from ruination. Perhaps it did, but gladly would I have been ruined if I could have married Stella. I have never seen the Divine Stella since but another girl came into my life and I soon forgot. In a few years I took over the "Opry House" and one of the first engagements was that of James Owen O'Connor, a tragedian of the Shakespeare line. Had he lived he would have gained the world's recognition but, alas! he died insane. In his room he would recite portions from Shakespearian scenes by the hour. He had a marvelous voice, full, rich, penetrating, musical. In the scene where Yorick's skull is dug up and he says, "Alas! Poor Yorick, I knew him well," he hesitated, finished, stammered a moment and then went on with the lines. Some one had printed on the forehead of the skull, "This is not Yorick. It is what is left of Bill Jones." Among other attractions were Marie Carlyle, a violinist. She got in bad, for the church folks found out that she smoked. Then came The Only Zack, the Russian Four and many others, among them Belva Lockwood, the only woman who ever ran for president. I think today of the enjoyment and pleasure of meeting this woman. One time in the early ninetys I was present at an after-the-show affair with Joseph Jefferson the honor guest. He told tales of his early life when he traveled with his father's troupe in wagons. One night they drove through miles of mud and rain into Springfield then a small village. The powers that be refused to allow "play actors" the use of the town hall and quite a heated argument took place in the town tavern. At last a tall, gaunt, skinny man arose and said that they should have the opportunity to put on their show and he had a stable fixed up and the slow went on. That man was Abraham Lincoln. During the time I lived at the Hollenden Hotel, Cleveland, Adalina Patti sang in that city. Several times I stood by her side as we ascended in the "lift" and it gave me opportunity to observe her off stage. Her private suite consisted of a dining room, reception room, two bedrooms and baths. The rooms were finished in ivory and gold and all the furniture was upholstered with brocade with gold wood work. How did I know this? If you promise never to tell, will say that I took a bath in Patti's tub. While in Cleveland at the same hotel I met Anna Held--she of the glorious eyes. I do not know whether she met me but I do know that I met her. The elevator stuck between floors while we were passengers and in the jam she was thrown against me and, as I was always gallant, I put my arm about her (just a moment) and as soon as the excitement was over she turned her wonderful lamps on me and said, "Zank you." O, boy! O, joy! and when the car at last reached her floor she turned and again said, "Zank you." This was in the days when she made the song, "Ta-ra-ra boom de aye" a riot. One day God turned the light out of those beautiful, expressive eyes and Anna passed over the river. She was a little "divil" here but I bet money she plays with the angels over there. While a time I lived at the Criterion Hotel in New York and Dave Montgomery of Montgomery and Stone also lived there and for a time had the adjoining room. I saw him every day or rather every night for he was a night walker. Flashily dressed and always leading a fine bull dog. Guess Dave drank to excess for he was an easy and generous spender and a great favorite among the class he associated with. I first knew this team in the Wizard of Oz days when Fred Stone was the Scarecrow and Dave was the Tin Man. I never thought Dave was in the same class as Fred Stone and had he lived, in my opinion, he would have been left behind. He, like many others, who went the pace, died too young. I first knew Rose Stahl when she put on the skit, "The Chorus Lady." It made her a star. In 1913 she played in Dallas and as she was always my favorite I went to the show taking my little girl then three years of age. At the entrance Miss Stahl's manager stopped us and informed us that we could not take a child into the theatre as children always annoyed Miss Stahl. I told him that my girl was different from others and that she would not cry or in any way cause a disturbance and finally she was allowed to pass. Before the first act hardly started Mary Louise was asleep in my arms and slept until the final curtain. On that account we were invited back stage to meet Mrs. Stahl and for several years she sent gifts and letters to "the little girl who was so good." Many times I have been back stage when Hannie Ingham (Mrs. John B. Stetson) played. She was young, talented, beautiful, ambitious, hard worker but married to a man thirty years older, who because he could not go with her on contracts which were offered, kept her down with those he could make. Stetson looked like an Indian with his black hair, eyes and disposition, but he loved her and babied her and was kind and gentle until she, also, died too young and it broke Stetson's big heart for he only survived her a few months. Most everyone remembers Alba Heywood who made a fortune in oil in the early Beaumont days, settled in San Benito, became one of the Valley's prominent citizens and finally died there. Alba Heywood was born in Paw Paw, Mich., and was a finished actor, always giving a cultured and refined show. His troupe often came to my old town and I came to know him well. One time he found his troupe stranded and my father supplied the cash that enabled him to move to his next date. A few years ago I met him in San Benito and he recalled the incident and said, "Those were the good old days of my life and I enjoyed every moment." At that time he was a slender, dapper fellow weighing about 120 pounds and he was one swell man in his dress suit. In his days in Texas he weighed around 190 and carried a rather heavy forecastle but he was always full of joy of life and love for his fellow man. God rest his soul. Space will not allow more of these recollections but I have met many of the best and seen them all "where every man must play a part." Among them are William Faversham, Gertrude Elliott, Drew, Ethel Barrymore, Edwin Booth, Sara Bernhardt, Robert Edeson, Willie Collier, The Four Cohans (Jerry, Helen, George, Josephine) Nat Wills, Rose Mellville, Richard Mansfield, Dustin Farnum, Sol Smith Russell, Wm H. Crane, Frizi Schiff, Marie Wainwright, Lillian Russell, Fay Templeton, Rose Coghlan, Eddie Foy, Frank Daniels, Fanny Davenport, Wolfe Hopper, Francis Wilson, Maude Adams, Laurence D'Orsay, Will Hodge. Some are dead, others retired, a few still delighting the public.
I am sorry that the moving pictures have so taken possession of former lovers of the speaking drama for there was something very impelling in seeing the living, pulsing human, walk the boards and play upon the emotions of the audience. It gripped me, still does, and to this day I would go many a mile to see the only John Drew giving his wonderful portrayals or to see the beautiful legs of Marie Wainwright as she used to show them in The Fencing Master. Ye gods! such legs. "Legs is common now but her's were uncommon.
The audience leaves the house. The lights dim. The janitors and charwomen take it over. The carriage calls number 236--185--79--137 and the horses champ the bits, the harness rattles, my lady steps in followed by her gallant, the footman springs to his seat, the driver cracks his whip, the carriage rolls away. A few stage Johnnies linger at the stage door. The house is dead until tomorrow night.
"The play's the thing. Wherein I'll catch the conscience of the King." --Shakespeare's Hamlet, Act 2, Scene 2.
Matagorda County Tribune, January 21, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp.
"And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took the fruit thereof and did eat. And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons."
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This proves the antiquity of the fig. It is the first tree named in the Bible and from remote times it has been cultivated and used for its fruit. It has been named as many as eighteen times in the Bible, the first time in Genesis and the last time in Revelations, so it is the Alpha and Omega of fruits. Solomon says that it appears in the early summer, Joel complains that something barked the trees and caused them to turn white and die. Lake informs us that they are planted in the vineyards. The Egyptian, found famished by the brook, was given by David a cake of figs, while Isaiah said, "Let them take a lump of figs, and lay it for a plaister upon the boil, and he shall recover."
Matthew, Luke, James mentioned the fruit and Jesus used it in his parables. In Revelations you will find the last mention. "And the stars of heaven fell unto the earth, even as a fig tree casteth her untimely figs, when she is shaken by a mighty wind." Here is revealed to us the many uses of this wonderful fruit for it not only was used to cover nakedness, but in a fruit cake, as a fruit to be eaten from the tree and its medicinal qualities were well known in the treatment for boils. One can not fail after reading the Biblical history of this fruit to be impressed with the fact that since the beginning of man it has enjoyed a prominent part in man's life. So far as I know, no man can tell how and when the Magnolia fig was introduced into the Texas Midcoast, but the story goes that once upon a time a fellow went through this section selling Magnolia trees. The natives bought, planted and, lo, when they grew they produced figs and they called it the Magnolia fig. I guess this is as good evidence as any that may be produced.
Some time ago I wrote, "Wish Geo. Serrill would send me another beautiful calendar." Guess he must read The Tribune for in a few days along came the calendar. It was just six inches long by three and one-half inches wide. As I turned the pages I found that dire things would happen to me, such as fire, windstorms, skidding of my auto, (only I do not own one, neither do I owe for one), explosion, lost baggage, roof leakage, failure to collect rents, and so on unless, I took our protection. Fainting catfish! I have not been able to sleep since. On the last page George wrote, "This is for you. A larger and prettier one reserved for the madam." It came last night and was forty inches long by thirty inches wide and a beauty. This is one of the reasons, only one, why George stands in solid with the women. Well, what has this to do with figs? Come back, my thoughts, come back. It has this to do. George will insure your figs against hail, bugs, worms, the trouble Joel howled about and actually insure you a big crop and a generous price. This is enough about the fellow who turned me down. It seems almost useless for me to spend any time thinking thoughts about the fig, for so much interesting and instructive matter has been written about this fruit. Of course much of it has been theoretical and some of it has amused those who from actual experience knew how to grow the plant. We, who live in the Texas Midcoast are favored, for while the Magnolia fig will grow in many places, its habitat seems to be in the two tiers of Texas counties on the coast and from the western borders of Louisiana to the Nueces River. Commercially this gives us a monopoly and it is almost an axiom that it will never be overproduced and therefore will never call for gluttonous powers of deglutition. I found this word in one of my farm papers and it is such a dandy word that thought I would use it. I suppose it means that one will never have to be a glutton to deglut the fig. Well, any way, 'tis a dandy word and I shall use again some time. Greatest growth and production seems to come when situated in rather heavy black land although it will and does grow well in the more sandy soils. At Collegeport we are blessed by having considerable areas of the soil that this fruit loves best and for that reason, here, as well as in other portions of Matagorda County the commercial growing of this fruit offers great advantages over other sections not so generously supplied with the ideal soil. Excuse me, just looked up and saw a dainty pair of legs passing. They carried "ze pairfect ankle, 'n est-ce pas, oui, oui." Don't know what this means, but they were swell legs and as I am always rubbering at legs, since they are so common, had to let my thought leap the garden fence just a moment. When any of you fellows get too old to look at beautiful legs notify Taylor and he will do the rest. Careful preparation of the land is necessary and for this reason it seems best that an experienced person do this work. As the fig produces, except in rare cases, no seed, the planting is done by using slips which have previously been started in the nursery row. So rapid is the growth that much fruit is gathered in the first year. As I write, I can look across the road at a fig orchard, grown by the Collegeport Fig Orchard Company, which, with one year's age, has trees four feet high and the last season produced fairly well. Unwise promoters tell prospective buyers wonderful tales of the yield per acre. The writer knows of but one man who has taken as much as $1000 from an acre. Perhaps three or four have secured a revenue of $800, several have taken $600 but many have cashed in at the rate of $350 to $400 per acre. As I think these thoughts I wonder how much is required to satisfy man. Even at $100 per acre the fig beats any crop that may be grown in the South. This figure can be realized year after year and the best part of it is that it comes within the minimum labor and expense. One man writes that his four-acre orchard paid him $168 gross and after deducting all expenses including his own labor he netted the sum of $127.60 per acre. Still men are crazy over cotton. The fig is a generous feeder and while it lives long, survives enemies and is a lavish producer, the nutritive properties of the soil must be replaced if production is to be maintained. Of all the figs grown in the South the Magnolia has the distinction of being the choicest, and scarcest of all market fruits. The limited area, the unlimited market and the steadily increasing demand makes the growing of this fruit an attractive proposition. Here in Matagorda County we can justly claim to be not only "The Heart of the Texas Midcoast but the Heart of the Magnolia Fig Industry." We hold the key and we own the keyhole or in other words, "We have the bull by the tail and a downhill haul." So pleasing were the results during the last season that the local fig company is planning extensive improvements in packing facilities and I predict that the 1927 crop will be more than double that of the past season. Well, it is 12:39 p. m. January 18, 1927, and Texas has a new governor in the person of Dan Moody. No cleaner man ever took the oath. No man ever occupied the governor's office with more friends, hoping and praying that he may come out as clean and unfouled as he is this day. I wish him all the good things that God can heap up for him. If John Sutherland was an Episcopalian, a republican and if he was not so strong against Volstead I would begin boosting him for the next mayor. John Sutherland is about as near O. K. as God makes men except for these three things. He may reform. If I lived up north, which God forbid, and had a little coin rattling around in my vest pocket, I sure would tie up an acre or two of this good fig land while the tying is good. Looks to me as though fig lands would be worth several times the present price and that, too, in the not very far future, S. B. Sims earned a vacation and he took it. When he left croakers said, "The last we will see of Sims." "The fig company is busted." "Too bad for the people who bought this fig land." Well, Sims is back on the job and things are beginning to sizzle where he is. Sims is not a perfect 36 by any means. He has his limitations, but no man can say that he is lazy, averse to labor, slothful, inactive, inert, supine or some of the other things along that line. He is a "hell-hound" for work so let all the croakers stand aside and let him work. If the fig company amounts to a picayune much of the credit belongs to S. B. Sims.
Here's a good one on Doctor W. W. Van Wormer, president of the Collegeport Fig Orchard Company. It seems so the report goes, that the doctor was engaging a new maid, a recent arrival from Germany, and he asked, "Do you pet?" And she replied, "No; once I pet $1 on a horse race und I lost." The doctor thinking she did not understand again asked, "I simply want to know if you pet?" And the reply was, "Necks come arouse." Thinking she was a safe one, I am informed that he signed her up. Doctor wanted to be safe. As a last word will say that no one need fear to use the word, deglutition, in connection with figs for Noah Webster defines it as "The act or process of swallowing food; the power to swallow." Glad I looked this up as Carey Smith fears to use such long words.
Matagorda County Tribune, January 28, 1927 |
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Collegeport, Texas, Feb. 3—Visitors from afar came to this place last week, some of them came to see and hear, some had interests here and some evidently came to be interested. Those visiting were: Mr. and Mrs. Orvil La Bounty, capitalist and wife, interested in Collegeport Rice and Irrigation Company; Sam Jennings, Land developer; and Mr. Beard, insurance man, all from Chicago. R. R. Stafford, land developer and builder; William Han, brick mason; John Cragg, farmer and Mr. Walker, café man. Are Interested. All were enjoyable entertained on Monday night with an oyster supper at the Community House sponsored by the Collegeport Commercial League and with a negro minstrel Tuesday night by the young ladies of the community. The proceeds of Tuesday night’s show went to the Young Men’s Club, of the Monday night’s dinner to the League. Of their stay here many nice things were said but speaking officially for the party Mr. Stafford, spokesman added: “We are not contemplating early development of the Collegeport country under present conditions. “We have not found a morale in the country among the people that will justify the extreme expenditures of time, money and labor necessary for such an enterprise. “Until such a time as the people of the community shall come together as a whole economically to support the development of your community we can do little. “We like your country very much—we believe your assets are such as to justify any effort to develop it—we are delighted with our visit here.” Here Three Days The party remained here for three days leaving Wednesday morning for a trip to Gulf Hill there to see the sight they will tell about to folk back home. “The biggest sulphur mine in the world.” Build New Office. S. B. Sims and his men are tearing down the old brick building that was located between the post office and the depot and the brick will be used in building a new office for the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company and for foundation for other buildings Mr. Sims said. Fire In Car. Mr. and Mrs. Geo. Welsby had an exciting time the other evening when their car caught on fire just as they arrived home and threatened to be burned and to destroy the garage, two bales of cotton if not the entire place. The gasoline can had been filled with gasoline so that the fire was considered very dangerous. After having pushed the car out of the garage where it was ignited from the exhaust, by the use of wet sacks and water the blaze was spread and then smothered. It seemed that Mr. Welsby, for a time would lose his car if not all of his property nearby. Sermons Sunday. Rev. H. Paul Janes who was ill last week with the “flu” has gotten well and is about again. Services were announced this week for Sunday morning and evening. Themes that have been announced before will deal with the “Necessity of Having Christian men to fill the big places in the world that we are calling to them.” The evening illustrated service for young people it was announced will be “Moses, who made the Golden Serpent.” New Church Drawings have been submitted for the new church which it is planned will adorn the two lots givien to the community by the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company. The drawings were submitted by Architect Stayton Nunn of Houston, famed builder of the Y. W. C. A. building in Galveston. The plans are simple and dignified and designed to blend with the plains country and the scenery about it. This building, when completed will finish the public group of the Collegeport Community. Now constructed are the school building of red brick, a library which is especially creditable and a Community House, adequate for the purposes of the community for many months. Church services of the First Church of Collegeport, the oldest Community organization of its kind in Texas, are now being held in the Community House building. Paint Up. Dr. W. W. Van Wormer, president of the Collegeport Fig Orchards Co. sent a check last week to cover the expenses of painting the Community House. Superintended by Carl Boeker, the job was speedily and well accomplished but it is not quite finished.
Palacios Beacon, February 3, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
Collegeport has a new bank. Don't know just what kind of bank, but it handles money and like most banks keeps it carefully. Dance at Midfield tonight and one little girl, just cuz her parents will not allow her to go, wishes it would rain so hard that no person could attend. A bit childish but what can one expect of children? If our local preachers desire to know what a busy man does, it will be illuminating to read the monthly diary of Bishop Quin published in the Texas Churchman. These local boys have one soft snap, compared with the bishop's job. Truck men buying seed. Boy fell through the post office window. Seth [Corse] chased him, but lost him in the crowd. Paul Janes, pastor of the church, urging men to plant cabbage. Women in the woman's club breaking their own rules. Many times have wondered how many times one squeezed the teats when milking. Counted the other day and found it required 1018 squeezes to produce ten pounds of milk. Man who milks a cow has no use for Walter Camp's daily dozen. That pretty, beautiful and useful bird, the quail, is having a rest. Mary Louise all dolled up for the Boeker-Sims dance, with the Bay City Owls as musickers. San Antonio Municipal Organ Recital heard plainly through the radio at Hugo Kundinger's Pharmacy. One man was sure that he listened to an orchestra. Mrs. Ora Chapin feeding clabber to her darling chix. Hope she invites me to eat one of the white rocks some day. Fire siren at Palacios blowing at noon. No fire, just a practice blow. Fine to set clocks by. Thank you, Palacios. Just read an "ad" in Houston Chronicle. Man wants to farm on shares and states he can finance himself. Would like to see such a rare bird. Man and woman parked in auto. Married? Who knows? Carl Boeker enjoying the shingles. Boy selling St. Louis Post-Dispatch. Lots of bunk for ten cents. Full of divorces, murders, educations. Plenty of good reading at the library. New York City has all telefone wires underground while Collegeport has them in the air. This is one difference between the two cities. Winter clouds, heavy, damp, cold, covers the sky and the air from the seas chills one to the bone. E. R. Allen, the oyster man shucks oysters at our door while you wait. Some nine inches long. Have eaten oysters to repletion and I am full, overful, well found, well stocked with brain growing food. Can't notice that my brain is any larger. The windows of our three dead stores stare at one like the glazed eyes of a corpse. They look accursed, detestable, diabolical, damnable, disgusting, repulsive, revolting. Wish some men would breathe the breath of life into them. Then the windows would smile, glisten, scintillate and fill one with joy. My wife, miserable wretch, has often threatened to leave me and now says she is going to Dallas. The man is younger and handsomer, so she says. Says she is tired of beans. Suppose she means "has beans." But she'll come back with her curly hair hanging down her back. Glad she never got the bob-hair craze. Ina Gillespie is developing into a real writer. Her story on the Schumann-Heink concert was a classic. Her style is easy and natural. Mesdames Sims and Boeker collecting plants and seed with which to beautify the library grounds. Fleming Chiles going to San Antonio to complete his education. Wonder what girl will be the "queen of hearts" while he is there. The pastor of the local church announces plans received for a new church building to cost $10,000. Hope the plans realize into brick and mortar and that it will be a building designed for southern uses. It will be a splendid addition to our civic center. According to the reports of the United States Department of Agriculture since 1921 cattle have decreased 17 per cent in Texas and 13 per cent in the U. S., while hogs have decreased 54.5 per cent. Both kinds of live stock have shown a decrease in all Southern states. Looks as though the cattle and hog business is on for a boom. E. L. Hall's Dodge roadster axle deep in a mudhole but like the true Christian that he is, he never swore a swore. Like Viola in "Twelfth Night." Act 1, Sc. 4. "She sat like Patience on a monument, smiling at grief."--Shakespeare. Emmett Childs with his caballada, about twenty in number. Don't see how he can use so many growing truck. THE GREATEST THING OF ALL is that when a man dies he shall leave behind something of inspirational value to those still living. In the passing of Judge Norman Kittrell this has been done to the superlative degree. His death is an irreparable loss to all who have enjoyed his "Layman's Sermons" and the last one which appeared in Sunday's Chronicle, "Help to the Needy--Test Laid Down by the Master," should be read by all. It is typical of the man, always singing his song in music, that could be understood by the masses. Only last Tuesday did he give up his work, leave the halls of legislation and return to his home to render unto his Maker his sweet soul. I met this man only once, but have always loved him, and so will say God take his soul and give him rest.
The "male work wanted ads" in the Houston papers reveal some pitiful stories. One man advertises, "Must have work to support my family or else." Or else, what? Does he mean death by his own hand? I am astonished at the number who need "any kind of job," adding that the advertiser is a college graduate. What does this mean? Gustavus Adolphur, Sweden's Great King, established a Swedish Colony in 1638 on land which is now a part of Delaware. Peter Stuyvesant, the Dutch governor of New Amsterdam, resented this intrusion and in 1654 sailed with a fleet to conquer the Swedes. In this he was successful and the Dutch flag flew over the Swedish fort. Today no trace of the fort remains but the little gray stone church still stands as a reminder of the Dutch-Swede battle. This reminds me, when I read of wars and rumors of war, that after wars are no longer fought, the Church of Jesus Christ will still stand. "So fleet the works of man." D. C. Powers, an old resident, down from Houston looking over his property and collecting back rents. Say the burg looks as though it had a bad case of the dumps. Probably meant mumps. Mumps indicate a swelling.
The Son now rises in San Antonio. There is no man, probably in the state, who understands the idiosyncrasies of the Colorado River as does A. J. Harty, and for this reason it seems good that he is back in the irrigation harness. I never saw a man who could with so little visible evidence of work or worry, handle so many things at one time as Victor LeTulle. With these two men in charge rice growers should have much faith in the future of the industry. Gertrude Arhteton has written some splendid historical romances among the best being the Conqueror (Alexander Hamilton) and Josephine, Empress of the French, but I am not much impressed with Black Oxen and I wonder how it got by the local board of censors for the Woman's Club Library. To me it is a bit too salacious, striking, beating, throbbing, especially for young readers. The Denver Public Library through the influence of Mrs. Burton D. Hurd, sent our library some books which although unfit for use in that library still were readable. Each book was stamped "CONDEMNED." Several were classics but hearing the word condemned; our local censors threw them out as unfit reading. They came very near discarding a copy of the Bible for that reason. Joke on the censors. According to reports from the U. S. Department of Agriculture the Texas pecan crop for 1926 was 100 per cent against 30 per cent in 1925 and for the wild pecans the average price was 11 cents for 1926 and 17 cent for 1925. Looks as though Carey Smith's advice about grafting was mighty good.
Matagorda County
Tribune, February 4, 1927 |
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Collegeport, Texas, Feb. 10—With the announcement of the Gulf Coast Shell and Cement Company of Palacios, that it will bring a harbor with 6 feet of water to Collegeport, business began to take on new life this week. It is considered that this development is the biggest that has come to this section since the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company began operation here. Ship Shell. The establishment of the new industry to handle 1000 yards of shell a day thru’ Collegeport means many things for this section. First it means the establishing of a new industry shipping out of this place. It means deep water with adequate harbor __ _____ to handle freight by boat to all points along the Intra-Coastal Canal. It means the establishing of a land locked harbor at Collegeport with turning basin and adequate docking space for all boats needed, with complete landlocked protection from storms. It means the development of the railroad by improving the roadbed a development justified by the new business for the local line. It means the bringing of road building material at cheap rates to Collegeport. It opens the way for water-rates over the railroad by making shipping by boat to Houston and Galveston possible. It will encourage the establishing of new industries. The new canal will enter the Collegeport harbor at the mouth of Pilkington Slough and will run northeast to the west line of the H. A. Clapp farm. At that place and west will be established 900 feet of loading track, a turning basin and docks for boats will be built and a loading equipment that will handle 1000 years of shell per day will be installed. 10,000 Hens. Wm. Broughton, farmer of Citrus Grove, recently announced the establishment of a hen farm with 10,000 hens this year. This is the biggest single development of the poultry business here. Members of the Delta Egg Association established the fact of the profitableness of the egg producing business last year when an average net profit over other markets of $2.40 a case was realized on the eggs they handled. This year many more are taking part in the Associations shipping. The last shipment brought 32 cents per dozen when eggs are 20 per dozen on the local market. The establishing of the new poultry farm will add considerable interest in this section in the poultry business. Accept Plans. Officials of First Church of Collegeport accepted as a working basis the drawings of the new church submitted by Addison Stayton Nunn, architect of Houston, as their regular monthly meeting held last Monday night. The new building is designed simply but will take the lines of the country church architecture so well liked and highly recommended for such buildings by architects over the country. New Curtains. Material for the new curtains at the Community House is here and ladies of the community are busy preparing to install them. Mrs. Frank King, president of the Women’s Club has been the active head of the movement to install the curtains. Services for Sunday at First Church of Collegeport were announced to include special male quartet music and the service in the evening to include an illustrated talk for young people on “Moses, who made a golden serpent” Improve Landscape. Sponsored by the Woman’s Club, a movement to beautify the grounds about the Community center took for its duties of the week the improving of the grounds about the Library. Shrubs and flowers are being planted in an effort to make the landscape about the building more pleasant. Mr. and Mrs. Walter have been suffering for the past week with bad colds. They are both better now. John Carrick announced that already he has ½ acre of his tomatoes in the ground. Numbers of other farmers are ready to plant their vegetables. The Collegeport Rice and Irrigating Company is preparing its ground for 100 acres of vegetables. 2000 Cartons Ordered. A shipment of 2000 more egg cartons for the use of the Delta Egg Association was ordered out of Chicago last week. Workmen for the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company are replanting trees and making arrangements to trim their orchards. The work of wrecking the old brick building between the post office and the depot is being completed and the new office of the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company will be put up soon. 2000 trees from Albert Law’s Nursery in Palacios are being set out. L. Douglas of Bloomington, is being transferred to Collegeport to take the agency of the Gulf Coast Lines here. He succeeds H. L. Braley who goes from here to the Valley.
Palacios Beacon, February 10, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
"For his chaste Muse employed her heaven-taught lyre None but the noblest passions to inspire, Not one immoral, one corrupted thought, One line which, dyin, he could wish to blot." --Lord Lyttelton, Prologue to Thompson's Coriolanus.
Our good friend, Noah Webster, defines Muse as "To be absent; to be so occupied in study or contemplation, I observe that this burg is in one respect like Hell as described Hell needed was water and people." We are blessed with the finest water ever given to man, but O, how we do need people. The Fig Orchard Company has sold much fig land and I wish some of those buyers would move in and take possession and build and become a part of the community. The other day on the street I passed a good friend without speaking. I was musing on a pair of peachy legs just ahead of me and so forgot the presence of my friend. I know he will pardon me, when he reads these lines for he loves beautiful legs, although he never lets his wife know about it. The Gulf Coast agent at Buckeye, is also a lover of legs, but he also keeps it quiet from his wife. Tuesday night, the girls put on a minstrel show that was a dandy, and in some respects for above the average amateur performance. The gags on local people taken from a new joke book were all funny and many were original. The chorus was a real feature. Great credit to the director. Monday night the Collegeport Industrial League tendered an oyster supper to about fifteen northern men who were looking the country over. It is reported that the Chicago and Alton Railroad will give a rate every two weeks of $39.50 from Illinois points to Collegeport. Ought to bring many lookers and homeseekers. Wednesday night, prayer meeting; Thursday night telefone meeting; Friday night a public mass meeting and the usual dance. I know where I will be. Who says nothing doing in this burg? One can eat, dance and pray during the week. What more does man desire?
The activity in the growing of truck is a move in the right direction. The country around Hitchcock has long been known as a producer of vegetables and for many years that place stood first in express receipts. We can grow as much and as good stuff here as they can. Everything in the vegetable line grows well and produces in abundance. So far as a "muse" can see, the only problem is that of selling. It is always easier to grow truck than to sell. Harry Haines put up a good, but losing, fight in his campaign for governor, but it looks as though a thankful party is providing for him, as president Coolidge has sent his name to the senate as a member of the Interstate Commerce Commission. Harry has spent years in the study of traffic problems and is well equipped for the position. The newly organized South Texas Chamber of Commerce deserves the support of all local organizations, even the smallest should chip in their mite. Seth Corse took a trip to Bay City the other day. Maybe he sold all his stamps. Oscar Chapin has put in scales and will begin taking cream. Hope that receipts will be generous. The Fig Orchards Company plan the erection of a "modern office building" of brick, so says Sam Sims. But what's a name? Results count. Some one has said that we need more spenders. What we do need is more people who will produce. Spending follows production, never the reverse. Mary Louise using my Corona, as secretary of the District Christian Endeavor. She wrote eleven (count 'em) official letters yesterday. She is a good grocery clerk as well. Fine thing to have such a talented daughter. Paul Janes recovering from vaccination. Good to see him around once more. Gus Franzen shoveling dirt on the library lot and Mesdames Nelson, Boeker and Walter elbow-deep planting flowers and shrubs. Mrs. Liggett, first-class oyster cook stirring the pot as the luscious bivalves steamed. O, boy! That was some soup. My wife, the miserable wretch, dealing it out and Ora Chapin washing dishes. Wonder where Mrs. Corse was. She is always present when there are eats. Seth Corse out of R. J. R. Doggone it, why won't our merchants keep R. J. R.? Can't live without it.
If the ground hog was out at the noon hour yesterday we are bound to have some nasty weather. Hope he got up early, took a look at the fog and retired to his hole. I welcome spring.
"Spring the sweet spring, is the year's pleasant king; Then blooms each thing, then maids dance in a ring, Cold doth not sting, the pretty birds do sing, Cuckoo, jug-jug, pu-we, to-witta-woo!
The fields breath sweet, the daisies kiss our feet, Young lovers meet, old wives a-sunning sit, In every street, these tunes do great, Cuckoo, jug-jug, pu-we, to-witta-woo! Spring! the sweet spring!" --Thomas Nash.
Tom agrees with me. We are both tired of the winter. Don't know as Tom Nash ever lived with northers or not but he loved the spring. I have just finished reading a splendid story, "The White Nun," by Marion Crawford. It is not only a sweet and beautiful love story but is full of interesting information about the relation between the Vatican and the Italian government. Informs one on the laws of marriage, entailment, inheritance of titles, rules of the Italian army and of special interest is the description of convent life and the organization and business of hospital work carried on by the sisters. Worth reading just for this but if one loves, lovers, it is a rare treat. It is clean, sweet, decent.
The French Academy of Science by a large affirmative vote has decided that animals have souls. I am glad this matter has been decided. I have long contended that animals do have souls. No man who really loves dogs, cats, birds, cattle, horses, can really look one in the eye and deny that these animals do not possess a soul or spirit. I never have believed that God would waste such a precious thing as life, whether it be human or animal. Wonder why Noah did not kill the two boll weevils he took aboard the ark. Man in this burg bought a two-pants suit and says he will never do it again for they come darn near smothering him. Say, did you ever put high life on a cat? Try it some day if you want to see perpetual motion. Man fell off roof of the old bank building other day and dislocated his shoulder. Good way to dislocate. Always wondered kind of apple Eve ate. It was a delicious one. Connecticut's corn crop cuts very little ice as a national product, yet this state produces the highest yield per acre, being 47 bushels with Iowa second, producing 37. L. E. Liggett grubbing out Osage orange on library lot and planting rose bushes. E. L. Hall trying to teach his bird dog to fetch and carry. Dog got sore and laid down on the job. A. K. Eaton, the man who keeps the Texas Creamery supplied with cream, wondering why Oscar Chapin does not ship cream. Eaton says the creamery company depends on Collegeport for the cream from which they make Morning Glory. John Carrick shipping some more eggs and promising one dollar for every bad one. Some day some fellow will take John up on this. Mrs. McCune's baby has a chin just like the cherubs in the "Madonna di San Sisto." I see by the advertisements that dresses may be bought on the installment plan. Two young girls attended the Boeker-Sims dance Friday night wearing the first installment.
Matagorda County Tribune, February 11, 1927 |
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Published
by Official Organ of the County Department of Education. Edited by Claire F. Pollard Volume II. Number 21. Among the Schools. Heavy rains
materially affect school attendance in (Collegeport information taken from a longer article.)
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
S. B. Sims in wrecking the old bank building, found many curious things, among them being three woman's garters. Now he is looking for a three-legged woman. If she can be found it will be a great boon to men who like to look at legs for 'tis as easy to watch three legs as two. If the members of the present legislature are human beings with one spark of love for their fellowman they will defeat the bill which proposes a 10 per cent tax on tobacco. The present tax is so high that only a few of us can afford to use R. J. R. If the proposed tax goes into effect, it will be a real NUISANCE TAX and many of us will have to look for bootleg juice for solace. Members of the legislature should "Remember the Alamo" and die in their books before they surrender. There are some folks who would be very lonesome if the devil took a vacation. The grass is growing, the birds singing, the wind blows sweet from the southern seas, the trees are budding, the scent of burning garbage is in the air, young calves gamble so I guess spring is here.
Another good book is "The Way Home" by Basil King. While the "White Sister" tells of Roman conditions, this book informs one of the troubles and difficulties encountered by a priest of the Anglican Catholic faith. In this country it is called the Protestant Episcopal Church and yet if one reads the Apostle's Creed it says, "I believe in the Holy Catholic Church." Some day, so-called Episcopalians, will have the courage to eliminate a name which never meant a thing and does not now. I was confirmed in the Episcopalian Church, but I am not a protestant for I have nothing to protest against except a meaningless name. Anyway, "The Way Home" is delightful reading and a fit book for old or young. It is clean and wholesome. Wonder why it was not "condemned" by the censors. E. L. Hall buying a cold drink and Hattie [Kundinger] selling yeast. The latter is still boss of the Collegeport Pharmacy. Harry Haines' chance for an appointment on the interstate commerce commission looks dark since the appointment of Pat M. Neff to the U. S. labor board. Changing the time card of the S. P. Railway has injured the dignity of "The City by the Sea." Dignity means "Rank, character, conduct." Wonder how many of the Palacios delegation who attended the protest meeting at Bay City bought tickets and rode the rails to Bay City. It takes a good man, a man with courage, to repair a wire fence and thus far I have only cussed a few times. That's nothing for even preachers cuss, especially when they lose a fish off the line. Last week I introduced a Spring Song by Thomas Nash and I must ask the pardon of my readers. I sang the song too soon for the thermometer stands at 42 with a cold rain and stiff wind. Spring is a flirting dame but we will welcome her just the same. The Rev. Dr. Harry Emerson Fosdick, pastor of the Park Avenue Baptist Church, New York, says, "I view the Catholic confessional as an amazing service for the treatment of sick souls." He regrets that it has been "thrown out of the back door by protestants" and confesses that for eight years he has conducted a confessional. Will wonders never cease? What is strange about a confessional, the remission of sins? A governor pardons a criminal under authority given by the state. Why should not a priest given authority from Jesus hear confessions and grant absolution? Can any one answer. Many call it bunk and say, "The idea of confessing sins to a mere man and believing that he can issue pardon." The man does not give remission, any more than does a governor, except with power from a higher authority. If one will attend services at the church of St. Mary the Virgin, or St. Edward the Martyr, New York, or St. James, Cleveland, or St. Johns, Toledo, or The Church of the Ascension, Chicago, one will find that the confession is a weekly and semi-weekly service, available to all communicants and furthermore it is used for the purpose of healing and directing sick souls, giving them comfort, easing their burden. Of course in the Episcopalian Church, confession is not compulsory but it is there just the same and no priest of that church would refuse this office to a supplicant. Of course priests have the power to remit. Jesus Christ instituted this office and it has been used ever since the beginning of the Apostolic Succession. I believe in this succession from Jesus Christ in an unbroken line down to our own Bishop Quin just as I believe that Calvin Coolidge is the successor of George Washington in an unbroken line of presidents. "Whose soever sins ye remit, they are remitted unto them; and whose soever sins ye retain, they are retained." What did Jesus mean when he said these words as "He breathed on them and saith unto them, Receive ye the Holy Ghost?" A local Negro Don Juan came into Chapin's store the other day wearing a rather sporty shirt and Oscar asked, "How many yards does it take to make a shirt?" The Negro replied, "I got three shirts like this from one yard." Did not require a meeting of the school board to burst up the proposed minstrel show at Blessing next Saturday night. Nature did the work. One of the best things ever produced by local talent was "School Days," produced under direction of Dena H. Hurd. Wish Dena would come back home and bring Burton with her. Those were happy days, Bill. Wonder why we have few such days now? Different people, I guess. Everybody has heard what the governor of North Carolina said to the governor of South Carolina. But that was before the war on John Barleycorn. Now comes another governor of North Carolina who says, "If I were czar of North Carolina, instead of governor, I would issue an edict declaring from and after five years from date any man who imported into North Carolina any corn or meal, wheat or flour, beef or bacon, should be hanged forthwith benefit of clergy. Of course, in the beginning, I should be denounced as an infamous tyrant, but after the law had been in effect for ten years, the Richest State in the Union would build a monument to me as the financial redeemer of the people. This statement is good for Texas. Such a plan would solve the cotton problem and bring prosperity because of crop diversification. Isn't it the truth? The visitors from Illinois who were here the other week told those who attended the oyster supper given by the Collegeport Industrial League some good and wholesome truths. Wholesome, if heeded. They said that the community lacked morale. It is God's truth for if there is another people in the state with so little of this virtue I never heard of it. We are a bunch of fault finders, knockers, croakers, back biters and seem to enjoy finding fault with each other, knocking the country, croaking about what we could do under other conditions, biting each other's backs. Each group willing to absorb the other, neither willing to make concessions. Some day all of our people will discover Collegeport and at the same time acquire morale. Prescription for Collegeport: Develop acquaintance, understanding, fellowship. This will cure the ills of this burg.
"Ah, make the most of what we yet may spend, Before we too into the dust descend."
Some say that the great Ben Hur Chariot race was fixed. Wonder who knows. Anyway, "It’s a long time between drinks." I go the fence fixed all right but the old cow broke through the first night. She likes to graze in the fig orchard and S. B. Sims don't like it. Hard to please both.
"Ah, my Beloved, fill the cup that clears Today of past Regret, and future Fears: Tomorrow!--Why, Tomorrow I may be Myself with Yesterday's Sev'n Thousand Years."
Matagorda County Tribune, February 18, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
Hush! Hush! Don't let a word of this get out, but here is a secret which I share with Tribune readers. Certain things point to great development in and around Collegeport. Listen! the other day three mysterious men came up the Collegeport Ship Channel and spent several hours snooping around in the rear of my farm. They looked like Francois Villon's pals in John Barrymore's "Beloved Rogue," One of the stooped and tasted the water of the slough and that makes me think they intend to build immense salt works. This will be fine for us. We need salt.
Mrs. Oscar Chapin is slated to become the Chicken Queen. Mrs. Chapin is very modest in her statements and said that she intended to be conservative, but planned to run her present herd of twenty birds into a fifteen thousand hen ranch. She intends to build slow but sure.
"Sitting all day in a silver mist, In silver silence all the day, Save for the low, soft kiss of spray And the lisp of sands by waters kissed. As the tide draws up the bay.
Suddenly out of the shifting veil A magical bark, by the sunbeams lit, Flits like a dream--or seems to flit-- With a golden prow and a gossamer said And the waves make room for it."
At last the sunshine, the beautiful warm, glowing sunshine comes from the shifting veil. The earth rejoices, man takes on new encouragement, birds begin to sing and build their nests, dogs bark, calves gamble. Once more the world looks good and fair. I was doggone tired of fog, fog, mist and rain and earth saturated with water. Hope hens will begin to lay for we need and want some eggs. Everybody excited over the shell prospect. Hope it will not turn out to be another shell game. I well remember Soapy Smith who in the early Cripple Creek days worked the three nimble shells to his financial advantage. Soapy was a philosopher in many ways and I enjoyed talking with him. This shell business that seems to be arriving in Collegeport does not use three shells and a pea but as report goes will handle 250,000 yards of shell for the Missouri Pacific Lines. If they handle 1000 yards per day it means a thirty-car train loaded every day and to handle 250,00 yards will require a full year's work. Such activity ought to and probably will be of considerable advantage to this community. The only fly in the ointment as I see it is the fact that headquarters will be maintained in Palacios. The Portsmouth Special operating on the Collegeport Branch now sports a solid, steel train. Wonder when the M. P. will put on a parlor car for E. L. Hall to ride in.
The letter from F. W. Ives, St. Louis, which was printed in The Tribune last week brings memories of E. L. Ives whom I presume was the brother of F. L. Ives. E. L. was one of the original members of the Collegeport Industrial League and was often a guest in my home. He rode in on a buckskin pony. I enjoyed discussing local, state, and national affairs with him for he was a man who could talk intelligently on many subjects. One time I visited him in his Bloomington home. Since the Palacios Beacon has announced a 10,000 hen ranch for Citrus Grove, Mrs. Oscar Chapin has revised her statement and now says that having no desire to glut the egg market or in any way interfere with the shipping of eggs by local association she plans to cut her hens from 15,000 to 10,500. She adds the 50 extra hens so that Collegeport will have a larger ranch than Citrus. Some of the good women of this burg have taken occasion to resent some of the things that appear in this column. My advice to those who have no sense of humor is to forgo reading this column. One lady resents the fact that I mention my wife as "the miserable wretch." I advise her to widen her reading. When did the gods ever forbid a man calling his wife a miserable wretch? For several years I called her "my little black devil" but that was before I had tamed her. I have lived happily for 32 years with the miserable wretch who is my wife and she has lived considerable of that time happily with me. Of course I was not at home all the time for my efforts to keep her in feed and clothes required me to travel. I do not claim that these thoughts are strictly truthful, some are enlarged, broadened, amplified, extended, dilated. Wonder if this soaks in. Anyway they are this week just "Thoughts as I Ramble." If I were manager of the Bay City Chamber of Commerce I would invite all county commercial organizations to meet for the purpose of organizing a county federation of commercial organizations. The purpose to be the holding of regional meetings during the year, so that men could get together and discuss matters of county-wide interest. The women have these meetings. Why should not the men have the same opportunity? Palacios is interested and so is the Collegeport Industrial League. Full week for Collegeport. Let's see. Tuesday night the seventeenth annual Washington Birthday banquet, Wednesday night, prayer meeting; Thursday night, regular monthly meeting of the Collegeport Industrial League, and one night a dance given under the patronage of Mesdames Boeker and Sims. And yet some folks say "nothing doing." Wrecking of the old bank building delayed by an injunction cuz of back taxes. This also delays the building of that modern office building. Too many of us go through life with our tongues in high and our brains in reverse.
E. L. Hall has discovered a new method for discharging his car battery. Men setting out fig trees. Mr. Isle (Eisle?) figuring out how to sell the truck crop. Paul Janes having visions of the new church. Hope the dreams come true. Mr. and Mrs. Brazil (not from Brazil) just arrived to take over the Mopac station work. Seth Corse distributing a big bunch of mail order catalogs. John Carrick figuring how much he will make on eggs this year. John Heisey starting a fig orchard. School truck goes past with kiddies glad school is over for the day. Bank building looks like a ruin. That's nothing for we have three store rooms looking same way, thanks to out of town buyers. Sad days for country merchants. Forgot to state that there will be no cover charge at the banquet. Always like to see Burton Hurd eat. He always absorbed his rations with relish, gusto, savor, pleasure. On the contrary G. M. [Magill] seemed to make it a business and appeared glad when the ordeal was over. In many ways I always considered myself the biggest in this burg but I now yield to S. B. Sims. At midnight Thursday while that terrific storm was raging and hail the size of hen's eggs falling S. B. went outdoors barefooted, clad in pajamas and picked up hail stones. Take the toga and the crown, old boy, for you are more interested in weather than I am. Because Mrs. Liggett is to be the mail push in charge of the banquet Tuesday night those who attend are assured of wonderful eats and splendid service. For many, many years she has been a dependable person in all civic affairs. Well, enuf for these rambles for must train for chicken pie. With Burton Hurd was here to help.
Matagorda County Tribune, February 25, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
"Lo, the poor Indian! whose untutored mind Sees God in clouds, or hear Him in the wind; His soul, proud Science never thought to stray Far as the solar walk of milky way.
But thinks, admitted to that equal sky, His faithful dog shall bear him company." --Essay on Man, Epistle I.
There is grief at Homecroft for Pietertje is dead. He was just a little dog and most people would call him a cur but to us he was a loving and lovable companion. He was a black and white dog, a regular Holstein and he was named Pietertje. Ever alert when stray cattle were about he saved me many a step and for that alone I shall miss him. I understood his language and he mine and many a long talk we had and sometimes for a half hour he would stand, eyes bright, head cocked, tail a wiggle and answer every word I said to him. He never missed a milking, always going to the barn at milking time and laying down back of the cows would watch until the task was done and then with leaps and strange barks and throat noises he would preceded me to the house. No man who does not love dogs can ever learn their language but once learned it is as expressive as in English. Does a dog have a soul? French Academy of Science says yes. Pete had a soul and spirit and it showed from his intelligent eyes. I don’t believe that God wastes and therefore I believe that Pete and his soul are somewhere in dogs' heaven waiting. Pete was a great fellow to forage and he will be missed at the backdoor of nearly every home in Collegeport. To many he was only Clapp's cur, to others simply a dog, but to us who loved him and understood him he was more than a dog. Often in an overflow of his exuberant spirits he would leap into the air turning a complete summerset and lighting on his feet repeat the performance. This exhibition was only for those he loved for he never indulged in these pranks in the presence of stranger. He never courted familiarity but encouraged caresses. I have owned many dogs and loved them all. I remember Prince, Curly, Zack (named after Zack Chandler, Michigan's senator), two Queens, both Lewellyn Setters of splendid breeding, Gyp, Thunder, Lightning, NoCola and now I have only Pete's son, Junior and a well bred dog, Sport, a boarder [border] owned by E. L. Hall. At one time we had 21 dogs which, dog lover that I am was a plenty, sufficient, enuf. I could do things that would cause my wife, daughter, sons, sister to turn against me but nothing could turn Pete. In richest raiment or poverty rags he would still love me, lick my hand, and press his head against me begging for affection. Doggone it, why is a dog?
The U. S. department of agriculture is authority for the following: Taking 100 as a normal price, from 1919 to December, 1926, grains declined in price from 231 to 120, fruits and vegetables from 189 to 137, dairy and poultry products from 182 to 161, cotton and seed from 247 to 81, all groups from 209 to 127 and the relative purchasing power of farm products declined from 105 to 80. Some one has said that Rain-in-the-Face sometimes got soup but had he been present at the eighteenth annual Washington birthday banquet given Tuesday night by the Woman's Union he would have filled his face with real chicken pie, mashed spuds, salads, coffee, ice cream and other good eats. The affair was managed by Mrs. L. E. Liggett which was fire, wind and rain insurance of splendid service. Whenever this lady is in charge things move smoothly and guests are insured of enjoyment and pleasure. Mrs. Liggett and Mrs. Roy Nelson make a team that can not be excelled. Of course others helped and they did excellent work but I refer to the management from kitchen to table which was way above par. The features of the program were the talks by Paul Janes and Sam Sims. Both were brief and pithy, full of good cheer and information regarding the man we honored. In both cases "brevity was the soul of wit." County Superintendent Claire F. Pollard was present and although she had no advance knowledge of being a part of the program delivered a splendid address. She was followed by Louise Walters who spoke on Washington as a Man, Misses Thompson and Holtz, both teachers, entertained with readings while Dorothy Crane acquitted herself in her usual manner at the piano. Among those present from outside were J. C. Carrington from Bay City, Mrs. Braden and Paul, Arthur Mathis and Ruth with their baby, Mrs. Wright, Mrs. English, the Meyers family from Citrus, Kay Legg and family from Gulf, and Terence Pollard. About 150 were served and all voted that of all the banquets of the past none excelled and few approached this one. I saved for the last mention the fact that Homer Goff acted as toastmaster which insured a snappy program.
The men who bought the old bank building and started to wreck it for the purpose of building a new and modern office building obeyed the court's injunction and ceased their work but Dame Nature obeys no injunction issued by man and last Thursday blew down the remaining walls and leaves it a complete wreck and eyesore which I hope will remain for years as a remonstrance to those who are responsible for the issuing of the injunction. Some people "o'er leap themselves and fall on tother side." Why stop improvement in any burg that craves it as does Collegeport?
"Beasts of each kind their fellow spare; Bear lives in amity with bear." --Juvenal
"The world," says Locke has people of all sorts." Collegeport has them, Bay City has them, Texas has them. The fancy dress ball in honor or Washington's birthday, given by Mesdames Boeker and Sims, was a riot of color, attendance and conduct. It was a very gentile [genteel] affair and the music of The Owls supplied a tintinnabulation that was pleasant to the ear. Any person who knows the ladies who act as hostesses may be assured that these dances will be managed as high class in every respect. Some good people object, which is to be expected for the most difficult thing in the world is to satisfy all persons, in eating, drinking, deportment, religion, politics, amusement. These objections make me think of Dr. Samuel Johnson's essay entitled "Injustice of Frivolously Encroaching on the Rights of Others." In this essay he says, "When Diogenes received a visit in his tub from Alexander the Great, and was asked according to the ancient forms of royal courtesy, what petition he had to offer: "I have nothing," said he, "to ask but that you remove to the other side, that you may not be intercepting the sunshine, take from me what you can not give." In other words, get on the other side of the tub. Heard the sound of hammer and looking up found the Wilkinson building was being wrecked. Nother chance for injunction. Oscar Chapin setting out figs; Mr. Brazil, the new M. P. agent, playing at station work. E. L. Hall driving a Ford. Says the durned thing needs oil. Mr. and Mrs. Haisley at the banquet posing as Millet's Angelus. J. C. Carrington surveying the property of the Rice and Irrigation Company. Some one stuck in a mud hole. Wonder why George Harrison won't come over and fix a few worst places. Burton Hurd was not present at the banquet but I ate enuf for both. That grave was sure some slumgullion, rich, tasty, salubrious. Mrs. Emmitt Chiles watching her kiddies at the dance and Emmitt doing his stunt. Mary Louise [Clapp] weighing out sugar. Not for herself for she needs no sugar. Roberta Liggett nursing her sick doll with a telefone close by so she could call the doctor. Seth Corse setting out mulberry trees. Oh, yes, I hear the tinkle of bells. Can't be sleigh bells for there is no snow. Anyway, bells are ringing and a shower is coming. George Harrison, county commissioner, making special trip by boat at night to confer with Industrial League about road conditions. Promised to fix 'em up. Twenty present at League meeting Thursday night. The first strawberries of the season were served, the gift of President Hall, went fine with Holstein cream. Disraeli was a great Jew but a greater egotist. If there ever was a greater I have never read of him. He made Queen Victoria Empress of India but when time came to die he "thanks Jehova, God of his fathers, that he leaves no offspring--because the woman fit for his mate and equal to mothering his children did not exist." Am I right? If short skirts and low necks are only for safeguarding health, how long would a woman live if the limits up and down were taken off? According to the Beacon, Mr. and Mrs. Paul Braden attended the banquet. Did not know Paul was married, but one can't tell these days when infants marry overnight, without the knowledge of father or mother. Many find matrimony a place of eternal punishment. 'Tis easy to get into but hard to escape. Well, anyway, here's congratulations to Paul Braden and his wife.
President Coolidge gave an exhibition of courage when he vetoed the so-called farm relief bill. His paper returning the bill to the congress was an able document and gave good reasons for his action. This bill was first-class, class legislation. It did not provide relief for the farmer as a class but for groups of farmers specializing on certain definite crops. The old boy who did not raise crops as specified in the bill is left without relief. Before farmers begin to cuss the president they better read his veto. Well anyway, it would have been of no benefit to the Collegeport egg circle or to the prospective truck growers and for that reason we are for Cal.
Matagorda County Tribune, March 4, 1927
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Miss Mildred Holtz, primary teacher of Bay View School, Collegeport, was married Friday night to young Mr. Chiles of that place. Mrs. Chiles will continue her teaching work until the end of the term while Mr. Chiles returned to San Antonio to complete his studies in Draughon's Business College. We wish the young couple much happiness.
Matagorda County Tribune, Friday, March 4, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
"The stormy March has come at last, With winds and clouds and changing skies; I hear the rushing of the blast That through the snowy valley flies." --W. C. Bryant
March certainly came in like a lion. Gee whiz it was chilly after the fine days we had enjoyed. I was amused as I overheard two wise prophets talking. They both agreed that with this north[er], winter was over, and I thought of Act. 3, Sc. 1 Julius Caesar in which Caesar says, "The Ides of March are come." And the Soothsayer replies, "Ay, Caesar; but not gone." And so I say that March has come but it has not gone and we may have two or three severe chilly periods before April showers. I hope not. Here comes Jim Hale with three bags of R. J. R. priced now at eight cents, which means the country is saved. Hugo Kundinger unpacking a box of tonics, sedatives, vermifuges, laxatives, shaving cream, buttermilk tablets and other dope for black and white. Corn meal with weevils sold at the local store, also oatmeal with same brand of protein. Lots of rumors about the shell game but even the "wiseheimers" know nothing. Up to date not one visible move has been made except the dispensing of heated air. Junior, the son of Pietertje, is dead. So now I have no dogs. Junior fell a victim to the same disease that carried off his father.
Ora Chapin offered me a little cat, But I don't think much of that. I would rather have a bow-wow-wow.
This last with apologies to Eddie Foy. Jack Holsworth
leaving for a job on the road. Some say he will sell abracadabras. I
know nothing about it. A. K. Eaton here looking after cream receipts. He
says that while the Texas Creamery Company can make Morning Glory,
without Collegeport cream it is a difficult task, for the butter lacks a
quality which may be called subtle, delicate, refined, ethereal,
sublimated. With Collegeport cream, Morning Glory becomes the true
Aristocrat of the Breakfast Table. Too bad this fine business must go on
the rocks because of the indifference of our local dairymen. If I should
hear a whimper some night and going to the door should find a collie
puppy I would not be one single bit mad for I do want a nice little
bow-wow-wow. One of the pleasures of writing this string of dope is
receiving letters from Tribune readers, some being bouquets, some
brick bats but all welcome. Don't expect to please every one. Last week
a letter from a reader in Kansas and last night one from a reader who
lives in Illinois and the latter is a WOW. Spasmodic sharks, but how I
did enjoy that letter. Listen to what she writes, "Thoughts while
reading thoughts that too much thoughts are spent thinking of legs. If
my husband spent half as much time watching legs as you do, I'd surely
put blinders on him." Gosh, all hemlocks, think of that poor man wearing
blinders. Here is the second spasm, "Your wife must be a martyr to have
lived and loved so long, miserable wretch, indeed, I heartily agree with
the old hens, censors, who took issue and I'd miserable wretch you with
a broom stick." Wow and a dozen more wows. She winds up her letter with
this parting advice, "Look to the skies--keep your mind above your
shoulders and scorn such frivolous things as limbs." I have never yet
been guilty of looking at limbs. I do enjoy rubbering at a pair of
snappy legs and I'll bet the husband of this lady rubbers whenever a
pair heave in sight. Avast rubbering! Well, well, well, who comes here?
It is the bride. Have often wondered how the local egg association could
offer one dollar for every bad egg found in a carton. I have just
learned that it is because every egg is contemporaneous. Those who rush,
into marriage without thought, regard, serious consideration will find
that it is not all applesauce. Listen to this: According to the
Palacios Beacon Collegeport items, quite a novel stunt will be
pulled off in the colonization of a certain tract of land. Its location
as given, is three miles due south of Palacios, across the Tres-Palacios
Bay and seven miles southwest of Collegeport. This land is to be cut up
and sold to truck farmers. The novelty consists of the fact that
according to the location, the land is in the middle of Matagorda Bay.
Might make good sales as oyster farms. The Beacon is full of
humor. Hugo Kundinger, treasurer of the Presbyterian Church, in sending
out an appeal for funds with which to carry on the church work,
mentions, "during the crisis through which our community is passing." We
are not passing through a crisis, we are simply down to normal standing
on our own bottom, not depending on an itinerant population. We have
enjoyed about three years of inflation and now we suffer from deflation.
But it's good medicine and we shall survive, recover, rebuild and let us
not forget that the Pope still lives in the Vatican. Open wide the
windows and let the sunshine in. All crabbers, grouchers, knockers,
backbiters move down to the bottom of the class, and this includes
injunction servers. Shades of Burton D. Hurd come down and breathe some
of you optimistic spirit into these people. 'Tis a heluva time to talk
about a crisis. L. E. Liggett filled up the morass, bog, quagmire, that
for many months has existed in front of Homecroft and supplied a reef on
which many a craft has been wrecked. He did this usual good job and WE
ALL THANK HIM and we also thank George Harrison for ordering the work
done. We shall vote for George next primary. Not necessary for him to
visit us for our vote it secure. For the benefit of the readers of this
column, I will repeat that it is not intended to adhere to the truth. It
exaggerates amplifies, enlarges, overcharges, dilates, expands, never,
never called a limb anything but a leg. Well shaped, well clad, they
always look good to me. Legs is legs. Tastes differ, for instance, I am
very fond of butter milk, but my wife, the miserable wretch, thinks it
nauseous, sickening, offensive. Wonder who Dr. Warren H. Wilson is. Must
be a great and a good man. This is the first week of Lent. It is a time
to forego worldly things. One thing I promised and that is that for
forty days I would not recognize R. J. R. anytime anywhere. 'Tis tuff to
pass up an old friend. If you don't believe it, try it. Egg circles,
dairy circles, bull circles are good stuff but what we need in
Collegeport is a few spirals. A circle simply runs around a ring while a
spiral as opposed to a circle ever mounteth upwards. A spiral means
progress. The Beacon in an excess of egotism says that Palacios
sold Collegeport. This is true but she had the help of some of the
latter's leading (?) citizens. She offers to sell Bay City and she can
do it provided Bay City's leading citizens co-operate as have those of
Collegeport. If you want the "high up" and the "low down" on our war
loans, read the article "Truth About Our War Loans" by Mr. Garrett
Carrett in Saturday Evening Post, issue of February 12. Instead of being the world's Shylock, we are the world's greatest sucker. It is reported that one of our young men on asking a father for the hand of his daughter in marriage received the answer, "No," and looking the father in the eye said, "What's the matter with her." S. B. Sims busy setting figs, pruning, cultivating. John Merck making a survey of the Pilkington Slough. Is the new station agent's name Brazil or Franzen?
"With constant motion as the moment glide, Behold in running life the rolling tide, For none can stem by art or stop by power, The flowing ocean or the fleeting hour; But wave by wave pursued arrives on shore And each, impel'd behind, impels before; So time on time revolving we decry; So minutes follow, and so minutes fly." --Ovid.
"Life," says Seneca, "is a voyage, in the process of which we are perpetually changing our scenes; we first leave childhood behind us, then the years of ripened manhood, then the better and more pleasant part of old age." With these words Dr. Samuel Johnson begins his essay of "The Ocean of Life."
Space forbids further mention but it is well worth reading.
Wonder who is blocking the shell business this week. Oscar Chapin working on Sunday, cutting hair and whiskers. John Carrick with his horsemobile going to church. Mary Louise [Clapp] all dolled up for Sunday School. If she keeps on shortening skirts it will not be long before all she needs is a string of beads. Do not worry about my other daughter for she writes "Myself, I'm in favor of ankle length skirts--trailing ones, once again." Glad I one decent female in my family. She evidently believes in the doctrine of "half conceal, half reveal." Something to that after all. What one can't see one can dream about. Nuf sed, but don't you all think I have done pretty well this week just watching L. E. Liggett work? Almost forgot to mention a most touching, heart-rending scene entitled E. L. Hall's farewell to Lizzie.
Matagorda County Tribune, March 11, 1927
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Collegeport, Mar. 15.—Mr. R. G. Hobbs of Springfield, Ill., secretary and treasurer of the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company, has been spending several days here inspecting the orchards and the spring work being done. He expressed pleasure at the outlook. Canning facilities will be enlarged to care for prospective increased production, he said. Hobbs is interested in the building of a causeway across the bay to connect Collegeport with Palacios.
Matagorda County Tribune, Friday, March 18,
1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
" 'Tis better to have loved and lost, Than never to have loved at all." --In Memoriam, XXVII, Tennyson.
I am perfectly aware that in writing on such a personal subject that I am running into great danger but my thoughts this day wander back to my youth and I am thinking of my boyhood sweethearts. Perhaps these thoughts will start the memory of some of my men readers and cause them to think of the girls they loved. I was about six months old when I acquired my first passion. My mother used to trundle me down to my father's store and the girls would gather around and say, "What a sweet baby," and "how beautiful," and lots of such silly dope but one, named Hattie, used to kiss me so she became my first sweetheart. Little she thought that twenty years later, when she was thirty, that she would find herself seated in a hammock, on the shore of an island lake, with the moonbeams sifting through the trees, that I would return her kisses with usurious interest.
After I had paid the debt, Hattie passed. When I was about six years of age we lived in Chicago at 112 Boby Street. At that time all south and west was undeveloped prairie and a band of Indians came from time to time with baskets for sale. One time among the band, was a beautiful little Indian girl and I fell for her and vowed that soon as I was a bit older I would join the tribe and marry the daughter of the chief. It was years before I gave up the idea of taking for my bride an Indian princess. Years passed and then came Emma. How I loved her was evidenced by the fact that one time when my heart overflowed with love I bought from my savings a stylografic pen and gave it to my Emma. One day in school when she passed my desk she laid the pen before me and I knew that all was over. It took several days for me to recover but Kittie with her blue eyes and golden hair appeared before me and it was not long before I was worshipping before another throne. Many a time I have hung over her father's gate, both to leave my queen but the time came when she gave me the conge or in plain English the gate and it was not the father's gate either.
When Stella arrived, my dream girl. Heaven held no further delights for me. She was the daughter of A. O. Miller, the actor, and as I was a member of his company I was afforded plenty of opportunity to love and be loved, but, alas and alack, Stella was too wise a bird for me and refused the hand and fortune offered her. I think she might have done worse and hope she did. It never took much time for me to recover and so my eyes rested on Flora. Flora wore beautiful curls, had blue eyes, dark brown hair and was a beauty in form and character. The daughter of a preacher and of a woman who was a dreamer and writer. I shall never forget Flora's sensitive nostrils for they were a prominent feature. She possessed a rare soul, full of romance and responded to my advances in such a manner that I was soon head over heals in the love broth. In 1880, a cousin of mine became engaged to a man named Elwin and for an engagement ring he gave her one on which was engraved, "From Elwin to Katy, June 4, 1880." That struck me as something unusual and on June 6, I asked Flora to be mine and she consented. She knew a good thing when she saw it. I tried to devise something for her engagement ring similar to the one Katy received but for the life of me could not arrange June 6 to rhyme with Flora and great was my disappointment. When Flora returned the engagement ring my heart broke and it required at least ten days for a complete recovery. Mary Louise has the ring now for she is my last sweetheart. It must have cost at least $6.50 but that was a stupendous sum in the days when it had to be saved from a ten-cent allowance. I never spent good money from that time for engagement rings for I found that I could hold them, long enough, without such generous spending. About the time I reached the age of 16 a woman came to our town, Mrs. Ba, divorcee, from St. Paul, sensual, voluptuous, beautiful in form and much above the average in intelligence, for she was world wise. She was sweet 27 and she fixed her lamps on me and began her courtship. She called me "my little gallant" which swelled me considerable for none of the other guys received such attentions. In about "three weeks" she asked me to run away and marry her. This proposition sure skeered me and I shied with the result that she took over another little gallant. This is the only time I have ever been proposed to.
"O the days are gone when beauty bright My heart's chain wove! When my dream of life, from morn till night, Was love, still love! New hope may bloom, And days may come, Of milder, calmer beam, But there's nothing half so sweet in life As love's young dream! O, there's nothing half so sweet in life As love's young dream! --From Irish Melodies, Thomas Moore
There was Alice. Don't you remember Alice, Ben Boldt? Alice was distinctive, exquisite, lovable, loving and would have made a wonderful wife as in fact she did for another. I fell in love with Alice in the fall which was a bad time of the year, for she lived about a mile from town and the walk home all alone in the cold winter nights cooled my ardor and Alice only lasted a short time. Hot love requires warm weather. While going to school at Poughkeepsie, N. Y., I met three quite wonderful girls: Ida, the daughter of a saloon keeper. I remember to this day the ravishing clam chowder her father used to serve every Friday and as the old man liked me I was a welcome guest at his free counter. Ida's mother did not approve of students and that romance did not last long. Then there was Mary, a fine girl, of unusual beauty, but a trifle chilly. I might say frosty and that attitude chilled the blood in my veins so that circulation was poor. One Saturday, I, with about ten other students, had permission to visit Vassar College. As we strolled over the campus we passed by a dormitory and a note fell at my feet. It had been thrown by a brunette girl from the third story. Many a time after that I met her in a clandestine manner and although I was engaged to Flora, remembering the rule of "out of sight, out of mind," I proposed to Ruth. This time had I enjoyed good business sense I would have stuck for Ruth was the daughter of a very wealthy banker in New York City. They all looked the same to me in those days and I gave no thought to the possibilities of an alliance with Ruth and left her when I finished school and went back to my Michigan home. There was Lizzie, Libbie, Caroline, Anna and perhaps others. Who knows? I do not, for I lost my date book many years ago. Space forbids description of them all. This is only the chronicle of a boyhood's sweethearts. From the age of twenty the book is closed for soon after that time I undertook more serious obligations and who would expect one to disclose all that happened from that date. Suffice it to say that at this date I have two sweethearts in Chicago, three in Elkhart, Ind., one in Goshen, one in Dallas and two in Collegeport. I shall not mention any of them by name for 'tis not always well to write of the present.
Of all my boyhood girls Flora stands out as the wonder girl. Of them all she was made from finer fibre. She was not only intellectual but spiritual, beautiful face, splendid character, full of romance, a writer of no small ability. I spent many happy hours with Flora. Some readers of this column will no doubt say, "This is not news," but using the definition of news, as given by the famous journalist, Dana, it must be news. He said, "It may be news when a dog bites a man, but it is always news when a man bites a dog." Make your own application. It this story causes one man to look back with fond memory on the days of boyhood sweethearts it has filled its mission. The man who has not had those experiences is not a normal man. There is something wrong with his make-up, something lacking, something missing from his life. O, make me a boy again just for tonight. No brickbats this week and one bouquet from the North, the writer telling me, "We greatly enjoy your "thoughts" in The Tribune each week. Deep it up, you're doing fine." Certainly glad some fellers like to think thoughts. One sick man in Markham has "thoughts" read to him as soon as the Trib is received. I had about decided to quit thinking but these appreciations cause me to re-think.
Matagorda County Tribune, March 18, 1927
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Mr. H. G. Hobbs, of Springfield, Ill., president of the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company, who spent several days in Collegeport last week looking over the fine fig orchards of the company across the bay, was in Palacios last Saturday in company with Mr. S. B. Sims, local manager of the company, and made the Beacon office a pleasant call. Mr. Hobbs expressed himself as being well pleased with the work that has been done at Collegeport and says that men are now busy getting the company’s fig orchards in mighty fine shape. He is a great booster for the Hug-the-Coast Highway, and thinks it will be one of the greatest and most popular highways in America provided they do the sensible thing and hug the coast wherever possible, as tourists will take this route in order to see the water as often as possible. Collegeport and Palacios should be built connecting the two towns, which would give Palacios merchants the trade of the rich delta section across the bay, as well as giving the people of that community access to a great trading point, and one of the most beautiful residential and liveliest playground cities to be found in South Texas or anywhere else.—Palacios Beacon.
Houston Post, Friday, March 25, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
Well, all I know about the shell business, is what I read in the Beacon. What I know, is just about as much as anyone knows on this side of the bay. We all hope for results, but thus far have nothing on which to hang hopes, except the Beacon. Experienced a sad accident last week. One of the girls (mention of name forbidden) wore her skirt so short that she nearly choked to death. Her life was saved, by the presence of mind of one of the boys who cut the skirt with his knife. The udder of a cow is a wonderful laboratory. The cow eats green grass and passing it thru her machinery produces white nectar and yellow butter. The ruins of the bank building make me think of the fingers of a dead man protruding above the skum of a death pond. "Out damned spot," or something like that. "The idea that one must become strenuous in order to do things should be eliminated completely, because it is the opposite of truth." Some of us delight to bask in the bright high lights, forgetting that it is down in the valley that things grow. We who have lived years in Collegeport begin to realize that to remain in a serene state will accomplish more for the wholesome growth of the community, than to become over excited from glittering promises of things to be. Let us do the work that the valley offers and let us not forget to look to the heights for inspiration. The Salamander, by Owen Johnson, depicts a true story of life in the city, lived by a certain group, but I do not understand how the local censors allowed it a place on the shelves of our library. Not fit reading for the youth of the community. Now take the cow for example, what a friend of man she is. Think, if possible, of one animal that from birth to death supplies man with so much of his necessities. Milk and meat, leather, g___ medicinal preparations and a score or two or three of other things ____ mean comfort and luxury to the human race. Mr. R. G. Hobbs, secretary of the Fig Orchard Company inspecting the orchards and the work of S. B. Sims. Of course not having come in contact with grouchers, crabbers, knockers he makes a favorable report. There be men a plenty who could tell him wherein Sims has failed. They have given advice which has not been used, hence they be disgruntled. I once witnessed a play, one of Mrs. Leslie Carter's early attempts, in which one of the characters was always being asked for advice. His reply was, "When advice is asked, ascertain what kind is wanted, then give it." If our local advice givers would use this rule it would save much grief. Anyway, the fig trees are budding, putting on fruit and soon the harvest will be on. Wish the fig company would begin work on the hotel. We need that much more than we need a causeway. Burton Hurd has for years been interested in growing things and is now interested in preserving things. He is the main spinnaker or sheet or boom or some other thing in The Vac-Dri Food Company of Chicago. They take vegetables that otherwise would be wasted and passing them thru a dry vacuum, which Webster says is "a space unoccupied by matter" produce a produce "bone dry." He sent me a box which contained several cans of the produce among then being onion powder, sliced onions, garlic powder, and O, boy! how we do enjoy garlic. These cans were packed in a liberal quantity of what looked like shavings, which my wife, the miserable wretch, said looked good to eat and so she proceeded to add water and boil it. Adding some seasoning and sich she produced a delicious vegetable soup. We recognized onions, carrots, (don't let Uncle Judd read this), cabbage, beets and several things we could not name but the resultant soup was a slumgullion worth slinging into one's face. I have since learned that this packing stuff contained eight vegetables. Last trip Burton made to Texas he scattered pills all over the state and I wonder if the will now fill Texas full of dried vegetables. While milking this morning I thought that a squirt or two of milk would improve the soup. Guess we will try it. My wife is tired of living with me and is packing her grip for trip around the world taking in Houston, Corsicana, Dallas, San Antonio, Victoria but like other miserable wretches, she'll come back to the only man in the world. Ahem! Avast heaving! Doctors say that Lander's disease or sleeping paralysis is a rare disease which has never been cured. This disease is common in this burg, but thus far it has only affected the head in some, in others the arms, in others the legs (not limbs). Thus far, the gods be praised, it has not affected tongues for this organ still wiggles at both ends. I am mighty glad that it has never troubled the legs of women for I know of nothing so sad as a pair of paralyzed legs. Legg to be attractive must be active, nimble, supple, agile, seductive, in other words worth rubbering at. Hope my woman friend from Illinois reads this issue but she must remember that I refer to legs and not to limbs. Cecil McNeil home for a few days enjoying life. E. L. Hall with his sport Dodge all dolled up in a new dress. If it costs $1.80 to drive an auto to Palacios how much must one spend in groceries to save the cost of the trip? Seth Corse decorating his house, wonder why? Not necessary for me to buy an auto, for Mary Louise always has a chauffer or chifinier at her beck. All she has to say is "home James." Have just finished reading Mary Queen of Scots and while I think Mary was not exactly as virtuous as she might have been I also think her "god cousin," Elizabeth, "The Virgin Queen," was some she hellhound. She hounded poor Mary from the cradle to the time her head was on the block. I choose Mary every time for she was at least faithful to her church. Some people in every community are like a chiliahedron. Not content with being the chicken queen, Mrs. Oscar Vernon Chapin plans to be the guinea pig queen of the county. She starts with two pigs and as near as I can figure she will have at least one thousand in ninety days. At $2 each this runs into money rapidly. One of the boys writing to his best girl adds this postscript: "Kiss the back of mother's neck for me." He knows the value of a stand in with Maw. Swan Anderson en route home from visit in California stays here a week. Likes this climate better than California. Says Edna and Amandus Pfeiffer have three boys and a girl. Allen with oysters which he shucks at your door.
"Books can not always please, however good: Minds are not ever craving for their food." --Crabbe.
With all the splendid books in our library, covering fiction, history, biography, travel, I can not understand why women like to read the filthy, slimy, disgusting, moral destroying sex stuff which comes through news dealers. I refer to True Stories and the rest of the klan. I find much to admire in Barnarr McFadden but never could understand why he should delight in selling the salacious. Thinking about cows, will say that one of mine is coming along fine. She is a jim dandy, good figure, good teeth, heavy feeder, always in fine physical condition, but the best of all is that she has udder accomplishments. And yet we can't help sighing for the good old days when were men and women weren't. Glad to see my wife, the miserable wretch, doff knickers and appear in a dress even if it does half reveal. Burning grass sends a cloud of thin smoke across the ruins of the old bank and lo the ruins disappear and in their place I see an old Spanish mission. I can hear the tolling bells, see the peons falling on their knees in adoration of the Blessed Virgin, see the incense ascending from the altar, hear the priests intoning the mass. God forbid that the wind should change and bring back the ruins. It has, it has, and now I see only the fingers of a dead man protruding from the skum of a death pond. On this, the 17th of March, 1909, we took possession of lot 50, in block 1, of the subdivision of the Ace of Clubs Ranch. Since that date all over the land people have displayed green flags and worn green emblems. They may have done so before, but I know they have since electric washers are fine tools, but they don't give the local gossip. Here is a thought I picked up in my reading: "Happiness does not come from having much, but from being much. And he who is much will inevitably possess much." Fine thought and you notice it works both ways. Mrs. Welsby selling hamburgers, Mrs. Hunt running a blacksmith shop, Hattie Kundinger selling yeast. King's Daughters eating good eats and dispensing latest gossip. Marie [Mary?] Louise planting poppies in the library yard.
The Bable.
Nae shoon to hide her tiny toes Nae stockin' on her feet; Her supple ankles white as snow, Or early blossoms sweet.
Her simple dress o' sprinkled pink, Her double, dimplit chin, Her puckered lips an' baumy mou' With na ane tooth within.
She is the buddin' o' our luve A giftie God gied us; We maun na luve the gift owre weel. 'Twad be nae blessing thus.
We still maun lo'e the Giver miar, And see Him in the given; An' sae she'll lead us up to Him, Our babie straight frae Heaven. --J. E. Rankin
She is here, the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Emmitt Chiles. Arrived the day before St. Patrick's Day and that's why she did not wear a green dress. Eight pounds of sweetness, happiness, joy. Bobby Mildred is her cognomen. Collegeport is sure a growin'.
Matagorda County Tribune, March 25, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp
"A change came o'er the spirit of my dream." A dreamer came to the land between Matagorda Bay and the Colorado river and he too dreamed, dreams of a settled, prosperous community, a country of happy homes, laughing children, waving grain, lowing herds, trees loaded with fruit, schools and churches. Strange to say, some of his dreams came true. Bob Thompson must have been a dreamer else he would not have driven a big tractor into a deep bar pit and buried it to the axles. Wonder of whom he was dreaming. Dr. Van Wormer, up in Springfield, dealing out prescriptions to his patients, daily dreams of a new Collegeport. Every little while the miserable wretch who is my wife, thinks of a bright thing. Here is her latest thought gem "while encouraging the march of progress let us see that it does not run over and trample on joy, happiness, peace and contentment." Pretty good coming from a woman. EH? I have always enjoyed dreaming and some of the happiest things that have come into my live have been the results of dreams. When I came to Collegeport I dreamed of a church of my faith and the dream came true, but life and death combined until the time came when the little Grace chapel in which we worshipped was deconsecrated and re-erected across the bay in Palacios and there it stands this day, as St. John's Chapel a replica of Grace Chapel of St. Mary's Mission. The same timbers were used, the building reerected on the same scale, same windows and doors, rebuilt with same material and in same form and style. We Homecrofters, thanks to George Harrison, took passage on the good boat Slopoke and were present at the reconsecration of this building. It was Sunday March 20th 1927 and the building was packed to capacity. One Baptism, one Confirmation and seventy-five participating in the Holy Eucharist. The Right Rev. Clinton S. Quinn, Bishop of Texas Celebrant assisted by Rev. Paul Engle of St. Mark's, Bay City, Texas. The procession consisting of the Crucifer, a vested choir of twelve, the Rector of St. Mark's and Bishop Quinn was most impressive. It was a happy day for us "three of a kind" on this side of the bay and every moment gave us reconsecration to our church. As I entered into the spirit I could see Theo Smith, his wife and daughter Grace and John Harrison as they used to accept the invitation to the communion. Every timber and board is saturated with sentiment and memories. We are sorry that it could not have remained here but we are glad that it stands just across the bay, close enough so that sometimes we may receive the benefits of our Church. Palacios ought to be proud of this handsome, churchly building which stands in their midst, by all means the most beautiful structure in "The City by the Sea." Church folks were present from Matagorda, Gulf, Bay City, Markham, Blessing and Collegeport. After the service all repaired to the Pybus home where a regular banquet was served. I was invited to a luncheon but when I saw this table I was glad that Sunday was a feast day. We had everything from roast chicken to apple pie smothered in cream and coffee and it was a real gathering of our big family carrying out the lesson of the bishop's sermon. About 5 p. m. we started home via auto with George Harrison and you all know why it required four hours to reach Collegeport and then in another auto. The carborundum, or perhaps it was the centifolious, refused to squirt gas into the cylinders and so we stayed right there in the mud. George said "darn" once but when ever he slammed down the covers to the hood they shrieked "damn." Wellanyway after while along comes Tom Hale and Emmitt Chiles and we were on our way. Those two boys looked good to me. No wonder for there was I, dressed in Palm Beach clothing wearing summer PDQ's and shivering and shaking. Talking about dreams. Paul Janes is having a dream about a trip to California in June, I hope his dream will come true.
My wife, the miserable wretch, has often dreamed of leaving me and now her dream has arrived. She left me Tuesday the 22nd and the Lord only knows when I will see her again for she was quite snippy about the matter and informed that she would return, if she did, in about eight weeks. Here is where I advertise in Cupid's Mirror. Heaps of women in this world and many good fish in the sea. Soon as I have a good bite will let you people know about it, there may be some other men in the same fix. If so, wish they would communicate with me for we might save some money in advertising at the same time. Ora Chapin dreaming of the dollars rolling in, soon as her Guinea Pigs begin to Guinea. Wonder if we ever thought that if we could look at the things with a child's eye, the world would be very different.
Heavy shower on Thursday, but local, only for it only showered in the home of Mrs. S. B. Sims and then for the benefit of Miss Lena Corse, who is to be married in the near future to--well I was asked not to tell, but I know the lucky fellow and I have known him for many years. Any person interested may receive name and address by writing me. I have known Miss Lena Corse for some time and she has been a real daughter to her parents, a valued member of our community. She is a good house keeper, a capable woman in many ways and a substantial character. The man who gets her could travel many miles and never have found her equal. Hope it pours during this shower. Just found out that Fred Robbins enjoys reading this string of demulcent. Will order a medal for him. Mary Louise riding a wild horse. Frank King moving cattle. Wonder who will be the next Czar. Community house looks fine in its new coat of white. The Allens with oysters, some nineteen inches long or about that. Which is the worse for morals, going to a dance at the Boeker home or driving alone with a boy down to Portsmouth and returning at 2 A. M.? So long as the girls or boys do not attend wicked dances they can do many strange things and still pass muster. I prefer the dance under the bright lights to the closed auto and the doused lamps.
I almost forgot legs this week had I not seen a dream pair last night. Stockings rolled down so that the dimples on the knee could be seen and tell it not in Gath or in Palacios but the knee (the one I saw) had been rouged. Gosh oil leaping lizards, but this is going some for a little burg like Collegeport. I was so occupied looking at this dimple that I forgot the other leg but the one I looked at was certainly a dreamy knee or leg I mean. Ask any of the old boys who were rubbering at the same time. We find one great advantage in this trip the Queen of the Homecrofters is making and that is the big saving when we buy oysters. With her at home we bought three pints. Cannibalistic in nature, like Boscoe, she eats 'em raw inhales them fried, and sucks them up in her soup. Now that she has left our bed and board Mary Louise only buys eleven gills. Wonder how Fred Robbins likes this week's string of sedatives.
"Come, Sleep, and with thy sweet deceiving Lock me in delight awhile: Let some pleasing dreams beguile All my fancies, that from thence I may feel an influence, All my powers of care bereaving!
Though but a shadow, but a sliding Let me know some little joy! We that suffer long annoy Are contented with a thought, Through an idle fancy wrought: O! let my joys have some abiding! --John Fletcher From Valentinian
When we arrived home Sunday night about 9 o'clock we found that some one had broken into our house; milked the cows and washed the milk utensils. Put everything in A. P. order. That meant the town held two more Christians. We now have seven in all. Ora and Oscar plead guilty for I found their tracks and they were obliged to 'fess up. Well seven Christians in a burg this size is coming along mighty fine.
P. S. Instead of a shower it was a heavy rain and extended from Collegeport to Blessing.
Matagorda County Tribune, April 1, 1927
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Mrs. S. B. Sims, of Collegeport, entertained Thursday afternoon with the loveliest party of the Lenten season, a complimentary shower, for Miss Lena Corse, whose marriage to Mr. C. E. Duller, of Blessing, will take place soon.
Mrs. Balker greeted the guests at the door and Miss Corse assisted Mrs. Sims in receiving.
A green and white color scheme was manifest through out the rooms, in the bowls of brides roses and white wisteria.
As the strains of Lohengrin's wedding march, the door opened and little Miss Jeddy Chiles, dressed in white, wearing a bridal veil entrain with a wreath of orange blossoms, solemnly marched to the honoree, Miss Corse, and presented her with a white flower bedecked basket laden with many gifts.
A refreshment course consisting of Bavarian cream, cake, coffee, nuts and mints featuring the chosen colors, followed.
About thirty ladies partook of Mrs. Sims' hospitality, and pronounced it a most delightful affair. Mrs. E. A. McCune, Miss English and Mrs. Morrow, of Houston and Mrs. Jerome Kimball of Palacios, were out of town guests.
Matagorda County Tribune, April 1, 1927 |
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Whereas, L. E. Liggett was one of the incorporators in 1909 when the Collegeport Industrial League was organized under the laws of the State of Texas; and, Whereas, ever since that date he has been a faithful and loyal member, paying his dues, serving as an officer, giving his time, advice and counsel and willingly assuming his share of the League work; and, Whereas, on the 29th day of March, 1927, while engaged in his usual vocation he suffered a serious accident; Now, Therefore, Be It Resolved, by the Members of the Collegeport Industrial League, in Regular Session Assembled at the home of Frank King, Thursday Night, March 31, 1927, That we hereby pledge ourselves as individuals and as a League to render such assistance to our fellow-member as in our power during his illness and we ask God to grant him speedy and safe recovery, and we also tender to him and his family our heartfelt sympathy and that we, grateful for his services in the past, renew our faith in him and his good wife, and it is ordered that a copy of these resolutions be spread upon the minutes of the League, that a copy be furnished to the press of the county, and a copy be delivered to Mr. L. E. Liggett and one to Mrs. L. E. Liggett. H. A. Clapp, Carl Boeker, Frank King, Committee. The above resolution was passed without a dissenting vote and the secretary was appointed as chairman of a committee to prepare the resolutions and give them publicity.
H. A. Clapp, Secretary |
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Collegeport, April 5.--The election at this place passed off without any excitement but with much interest, the following men being selected:
The only contest was between Evans and Boeker and Carrick and King but an analysis of the vote shows that there really was no contest. The district now has a board, everyone of whom is the parent of school children and interested in a nine months school.
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
To me, "when the lights are lit," is the happiest part of the day. It is the time when the work and trials and tribulations of the day are past. The time when one may take a book and roam to the Arctic regions, to the tropics, to the Alhambra, to Rome and the Vatican, to the great battlefields of the world. In fact one may roam where one pleases.
"Who hath a book, Hath but to read, And he may be a King indeed. His kingdom is His inglenook, All this is his, Who hath a book." --W. B. Nesbitt.
When the lights are lit is the hour when one may commune with oneself, and for that reason I am jealous of the hour "when the lights are lit." Well, all I know this week about the shell business is what I read in the Beacon and as that sheet is silent, I know nothing, but I am wondering who is blocking the shell game this week. The department of genetic psychology of a Western State college is authority for the statement that a kiss causes such a palpitation of the heart that the extra beats of that organ shortens life at least three minutes. It states that 480 kisses shortens life one full day. I knew that kisses caused palpitation but I did not know until now that my life had been shortened many, many years. If you boys wish to live long years better cut out kisses. But, "what the hell, Bill, what the hell!" What is life without a few palpitations? For me, give me palpitations, and a short life. St. Mary's Mission is no more. The Bishop has transferred us "three of a kind" to St. John's Mission, Palacios. I don't like John as well as Mary. Mary was my mother's name and it is the name of my last sweetheart but what's a name? Another dream gone bust. Glad that Viola likes this religious column. Seth Corse having his incubator boiler fixed on Sunday. All right if he went to church. Well, what do you think of this: the same two Christians who milked my cows last Sunday invited us Homecrofters to dinner. Thought it would be a Guinea pig dinner but it proved to be one of Ora's delicious chicken dinners with gravy eneverything. Our faces and hearts are full and so are our tummies. I looked at Ora's Guinea pigs but they haven't Guinead yet. Among my reading this week is The Mysterious Rider by Zane Grey, and like all of his books there was plenty of cattle rustling, broncho busting, heaps of gun pulling with accompanying killing, some good love work and wonderful descriptions. Zane Grey is a master painter when it comes to descriptive work. As I have lived in the mountains and camped on the trail many a day I appreciate his work and like to read his stories. Another book is The Right Way by Gilbert Parker. A story of Montreal and Quebec and a little town called Chaudiere. It is a religious story carrying a fine love scene. Both good stuff fit for young and old. Then for Lenten reading I have read What a Churchman Ought to Know, by the Reverend Frank E. Wilson, rector or Christ Church, Eau Claire, Wis., and The Church and Her Ways, issued by the Diocese of Minnesota. Right good for churchmen and would do no harm for others to read. E. L. Hall, fishing on Sunday and catching them in bundles. Mary Louise giving a fish breakfast on Monday. Reverend Janes Sr. here to see how his son, Paul, is hitting the ball. If all preachers in the world were like Janes Sr., we would have a better world. Wonder why C. E. Duller of Blessing visits Collegeport so often. Some say he is looking for a place for a number two grocery. Jack Holsworth getting up the milk cows Sunday morning and singing in the quartet at night. Hugo Kundinger closed his store Sunday and went to church. Poor business closing a cold drink place on Sunday. The young men getting a feast at Homer Goff's. The Industrial League meeting at Frank King's. The Taste of Apples by Jennette Lee is full of humor and good sense. Rather a homely story of common folks but splendid reading from "kiver to kiver." Grass and weeds growing fast in the orchards. More men needed it appears to a roadside observer. One of the school kids defines "unawares" as what you take off just before you put on your nightie. Some folks are dull but some are duller, and others will become duller.
"That light we see is burning in my hall. How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in a naughty world." Merchant of Venice, Act V, Sc. I--Shakespeare
One of our substantial citizens called me down good and hard the other night for writing these thoughts and requested that I desist, discontinue, abstain, cease, leave off; in other words, quit thinking. He told me that it was silly stuff, foolish, not fit to read and then some more. I told him that he did not have to read my column, but that if he did, to use a sieve and allow the silly and foolish things to escape, only keeping the good things. Of course some of it is silly, I intend it to be, some of it does not adhere strictly to the truth, I do not intend that it shall, some is exaggerated as I intend it, but some of it is mighty good stuff that would harm no man to read. Well, anyway, I can't please everybody and so long as Viola and many others like it we will continue to think. Some one has said that a man may be hanged for thinking, so let's remember that in this column I am only thinking.
"To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow, Creeps in this petty pace from day to day, To the last, syllable of recorded time; And all our yesterdays have lighted fools The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow; a poor player, That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no more: I is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing." --Macbeth, Ace V, Sc. 5--Shakespeare.
Why should the devil have all the good times? Foolish women reading the Bible and predicting that this country is about to the plunged into a world war. Some men dispense the same fool talk which only proves that some men are also foolish. L. E. Liggett is one lucky boy escaping from a turning tractor with a broken leg. I don't enjoy the idea of Burton Hurd going through this country and not stopping off at Collegeport. Mary Louise making a Peach Betty and it was peachy food. Two boys and two girls shooting craps. Actors and actorines strutting the boards, rehearsing for a local play. Girl waiting for the mail with royal purple lips. Wonder why they can not use natural tones. "Mr. Corse I done lost the combination to my box." One of our leading politicians is now drinking his coffee from a cup. "Men of limited intelligence generally condemn what is above their power of understanding."--La Roche. Anyway the safest place on the train is on the cowcatcher. Allen opening oysters while you wait the last of the season and some nineteen inches long or about that. It will require some patience to wait until September but by that time some may be twenty-nine inches long. Bonita, wife of the late Pieterje, has given birth to four posthumous bow wows. The trouble with some people is that their reading is confined to the Semi-Weekly Farm News and Farm & Ranch. Never do they stick their nose inside a daily or a first class book. Ask them if they know Glenn Frank and they will reply that he must have moved away before we came. Ask about Dr. Frank Crane and they will reply that they always call Doc. Wagner. Ask about Oscar Odd and they will ask if he is kin to the McIntyre who bought the Joe Diggin place.
"And lately, by the Tavern Door agape, Came shining through the Dusk an Angel Shape, Bearing a Vessel on his Shoulder; and He bid me taste of it; and 'twas--the Grape!"
Enough of Omar or I will be called for that. Paul Janes changed his Overland into a comfortable ambulance in which he moved L. E. Liggett to the Bay City Hospital. Tommy Hicks doing fancy stunts with the riata. Worshipping girls looking on. Bunch of young people on the beach enjoying roast wieners with Ora and Oscar as chaperons or chiliarchs. Ben Mowery studying blueprints of the Ralph Wright League subdivision. Gus Franzen and Frank King discussing school election affairs. "Why don't you go to the dances at Mrs. Boeker's?" "I never could learn to dance," was the reply. "You could, too. It's easy," replied the first. "All you have to do is keep turning around and wiping your feet." Pretty good description of the modern dance. Just received another bouquet, this from a reader in Chicago. Listen to this spiel: "I enjoy your articles in The Tribune and my wife gets a great kick out of this leg stuff. As for me when I get too old and decrepit to a well turned ankle in silk hose and good shoes, I'll be ready to cash in or be shot as utterly worthless." Maybe I have gone too far with this leg business as my Collegeport critic stated. Here is a man willing to be shot at sunrise. I dunno. The mocking birds are inspecting the plum tree, orioles are looking over apartments in the willow, blackbirds are beginning to build. It won't be long before we shall have the pleasure of watching the young birds. Scat you cat. I rather have my birds. Mrs. King turning the eggs in her incubator. She also knows how to make delicious sandwiches. Mrs. Fleming Chiles dropping weines in the ashes. Louise Walter looking on with dripping lips and expressive, significant, sympathetic eyes. Hugo trying to sell his auto. "It ain't how legs looks, it's how they does," crisply retorted Henley. "A pair of wooden legs that keeps goin' the straight road, and don't tote you into trouble, is a heap better than them kind that look like statues and always take you to places where you don't belong. Why?" My wife, the miserable wretch, wants to come home but she must stay until she will really appreciate a good man.
"Night candles are burnt out, and jocund day Stands tiptoe on the misty mountaintops! --Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Sc. 5
My candle sputters, sputters, its light goes out, a thin column of smoke ascends, dissolves. Time to retire. Good-night.
Matagorda County Tribune, April 8, 1927
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Lieutenant James M. Hutchinson, air service armament officer, had a narrow escape from death Monday morning when a Voight single-seater plane in which he was carrying out a reconnaissance mission developed engine trouble while at a low altitude and crashed to the ground in a rice field near Collegeport, five miles east of Camp Palacios. Lieutenant Hutchinson was uninjured, but the plane landed nose down in a deep ditch and was destroyed. Other planes from the air went to his assistance after residents of the town of Collegeport reported the crash to division headquarters by telephone.
Matagorda County Tribune, Friday, April 12,
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Lena Corse and Charles E. Duller were married by Paul H. Janes Sunday, April 10, at 6 p. m. in Collegeport, the home of the bride's parents.
The wedding was a quiet one, the guests being Mr. and Mrs. James Lee Gregory of Houston, daughter; Charles E. Duller, Jr., of Houston and Dorothy Weaver, Blue Island, Ill., sister of Mr. Duller; Mr. and Mrs. S. B. Sims; Mrs. Janes, and daughter, of Collegeport.
Matagorda County Tribune, April 15, 1927
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Thoughts When the Cow Put Her Foot in the Milk Bucket By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
The ship only stopped here long enough to take on four new passengers. Anyway "the King is dead. Long live the King." It's one damn thing after another as the man said watching two curs fight. I am glad that school election is over and that the country has been saved.
"Ay, me! what perils do environ The man that meddles with cold Iron." --Hudibras, Part I, Cant. III--S. Butler.
About that milk bucket. Remember when these are only thoughts, not words and this is what I thought: ? ? ? ! ! ! xzxywax ? ? ! ! ! xcbtedzy ? ? ! ! ? ? What would any of you think I should think? Oscar Chapin getting new tubes for his auto. Paul Janes conducting a revival at Garwood. Homer Goff makes a good preacher. People better hire him. Emmitt Chiles and Frank King grinning broadly. Tom Hale in Bay City all day Saturday. Jim Hale and wife voting early so they would not be late. Sam Sims has planted 117 shade trees on the streets. Some Sims or Sams. Wonder when Royal Dixon will begin hunting bugs and flowers. An Arkansas paper states that he will locate in that state because he has never found a place so well suited for the study of birds, bugs, animals and flowers. Said the same thing here. If the young baby's mother objects to being kissed--then kiss the baby. A porcupine has many fine points. Dr. Frank Crane says that the liquor business is about as easy to regulate or make legal as it is to tame a hyena. He told the truth as we are finding out. A town is built on a triangle. Spiritual, educational and business, but most chambers of commerce spend their talents on the business side. Some day a chamber will tackle the other two sides and then that lucky town will pass all their neighbors. Die-hards are always with us but never mind they always die. One of the pupils was asked what he thought of the idea of girls developing themselves in the high branches and he replied, "You gotta admit they have done a lot as far as the lower limbs are concerned." Not bad for a rural pupil. Eh? You see even the boys know something about legs. Observation is a great thing, but for me, I find that rubbering is easier and gets results. A woman found a strange hair pin in hubby's auto. Isn't that turrible? An advertisement says, "I had indigestion so bad that I was even afraid to eat rice. Adlerika has done me so much good that I now eat anything." I get a great kick out of reading advertisements. John Carrick wondering why? John Heisey and wife going to the polls. Mr. P. A. Rogers of McAllen, speaking before a farmers' meeting, stated the tax receipts show that farm land in Hidalgo County is now taxed at from $15 to $35 per acre including all taxes and depending on improvements. And yet they flock to the Valley.
A church advertises, "Come worship with us and we will do thee good." Much truth in this for some of them do do you good, and plenty. Wonder how many of the present-day girls could take the title role in Lady Godiva. Seth Corse says, "The government does not require me to lick the stamps I sell." Strange. Wonder if my Collegeport critic will approve of these philosophical dialectics this week. John Heisey peddling meat. About fifteen wondering how it happened. "On their own merits modest men are dumb." "The principal difference between a cat and a lie," said Mark Twain, "is that a cat has only nine lives." The first lip painting was done by Eve, who used a cherry for the purpose of winning Adam. Nowadays white girls use Negro colors because they know no better and they look slovenly, untidy, disorderly, unattractive, reckless. Busy town this week: Show practice Monday night, Tuesday one may pray and then dance or dance and then pray, Wednesday night choir practice, Thursday night prayer meeting, Friday night picture show and Saturday night I hope we can go to bed at 7:30 and rest. Mrs. Welsby hunting a hamburger stand in Markham and Oscar Chapin looking for a barber shop location. This burg is certainly shrinking. The Industrial League has ordered water for the Library. Just another little thing but in a year it does many little things. If I intended to pray for Collegeport, I would say, "O, Lord, put it in the hearts of Dr. Van Wormer and his associates to send some people down here." About all we need is folks.
"We're wondering what the knock-kneed will do? Those with fatted calves can diet, they can even exercise awkward ankles, but just what can anyone do about rejuvenating knees?" Now, please do not jump on me for this. I copied it from an advertisement issued by the D. P. Moore Dry Goods Co. I have known D. P. for many years and never suspected that he was interested in legs or knees. It only proves that so long as men are normal, they are never too old. I welcome D. P. into the grand army of leg rubberers. When that miserable wretch of a wife who is now in Dallas was looking at Vesuvius in eruption she remarked, "It looks just like hell," and a Frenchman standing near said, "Ah, zee Americans! Where have zey not been?" Mary Louise has me pretty well broken in as a dish dryer. Of course I do not do it willingly, but I am afraid of her right arm. Now that she is planning to leave me I have a place open for some sweet, pretty, loving, beautiful legged damsel. Make application through Seth Corse who has been appointed my agent. A Chicago girl names Nancy promised to come down and take the place but she broke her ankle. Hope it will not be enlarged when she recovers for I do not like big ankles. Looks as though Cashway had gone into auto accessory business. People eat food, not tubes. Wish some fellow would buy, rent or take possession of one of our empty stores and put in a stock of eats and notions. I would rather have it than another church.
"Well, let us take them! What have we to do? With Kaikobad the Great, or Kaikohusru? Let Zal and Rustum bluster as they will, Or Hatim call to supper-heed not you.?
Omar Khayyam was born in the latter half of the eleventh century and died in the year 1123. Khwajah Nizami, one of his pupils, related that "I often used to hold conversations with my teacher, Omar, and one day he said, "My tomb shall be in a spot where the north wind may scatter roses over it." "Years after I visited the tomb, and lo! the boughs stretched over the garden wall and dropped their blossoms upon the tomb."
"Rest in thy grave beneath the crimson rain, Of heart desired roses. Life is vain, And vain the trembling legends we may trace Upon the open book that shuts again." --Justin Huntley McCarthy.
Why is "shoppe?" Isn't shop good enough? Jack Holsworth loading out a car of rice. Vernon Bowers cleaning grocery shelves with one hand and with the other informing me that they had no corn meal. I have a new motto on my wall. "What is home without a female parent?" It is almost as bad as one without a child. I have both. Wonder who invented the one wife idea. It's all bunk. If I had several, one could go to Dallas and the others could keep the home fires burning. Great things for cotton farmers. Why raising cotton would be a cinch if a cotton farmer could have several wives. The Mormons had one good thing to their credit. I always liked the Mormon church.
Some of this dope may be like anaphylactics to some but portions of it is good for any man's gizzard. Carl Boeker with a bunch of fishermen and poles loaded on his truck after fish. Hope he brings me a good one. Shorty handing out pecans. William Riley sporting a new Dodge Sedan. Tommy Hicks imitating Gilpin. People reading Paul Janes invitation to attend services during Holy Week. Seth Corse shutting the delivery window and folks going home. Anfractuousity is a dandy word and I must find a place to use it. Sounds good to muh. Berries are ripe and if a rain comes there will be a big crop. Go good with Holstein cream and Imperial sugar. Mighty sick of living all by myself. If Mary Louise does not return promptly will have to look for some other girl. Those who failed to read President Coolidge's veto of the McNary-Haugen bill are hereby invited to read the exposé by Garet Garrett, in the Saturday Evening Post of April 2, 1927. It is a clear, lucid, easily understood, limpid, sober and sound explanation of why the passage of this bill would be of little or no benefit to the farmer. And so I thought "zcyxwv??"!!mterezxywt??" but mostly ????." Hope the Lord will forgive me for thinking these thoughts. "Ex nihilo nihil fit [Nothing comes from nothing]."
Matagorda County Tribune, April 15, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
"Every life is its own excuse for being, and to deny or refute the untrue things that are said of you is an error in judgment. All wrong recoils upon the door, and the man who makes a wrong statement about others is himself to be pitied, not the man he vilifies. It is better to be lied about than to lie. At the last no one can harm us but ourselves."--Fra Elbertus
About the silliest thing one can do is to stop a newspaper subscription because something is printed one does not like. One of my Collegeport neighbors stopped his Tribune because he did not like the story I wrote about the death of my dog Pete. He says it is all bunk and a lot of other things. Carey will get The Tribune out this week as usual but about next week I have my doubts. I dunno. No editor can possibly expect to please all of his readers.
"When Bishop Barkeley said, 'there was no matter,' And proved it--'twas no matter what he said."--Byron.
Listen to this from a well known woman, a well educated woman, a woman who reads, who loves music and flowers: "So glad you re-read my writing correctly about your newspaper articles. We want to see every one." Which is right in their estimate of these thoughts? Which is applause and which is apple sauce? "Vexata quaestio."
"Then said a second--'Ne'er a peevish Boy Would break the Bowl from which he drank in joy; And He that with his hand the vessel made Will surely not in after Wrath destroy'."
Nuf sed, except that no person has told me to "let them alone if he wants to keep out of trouble." That's just plain fabrication, manufactured, invented, produced, framed up, forged, coined, or in other words it's not true. If I take this man off the list of Christians there will only be six left. Better look out--name deleted by censor--for ef you don't the booggie weeggies will git yuh.
Well, anyway, Mary Louise returned home at 2 a. m. Monday and I was sure glad to see my kiddo once more. The Rev. Paul Engle, rector of St. Mark's, Bay City giving us "two of a kind," a 7:30 a. m. communion. From here to Blessing for same service, then to Palacios for 11 a. m. service and back to Bay City. This week he holds fourteen services of the church, not little Lenten talks but complete communion and morning prayer and even song. In this way the church takes her service to every communicant in Matagorda County during Passion Week. What a beautiful old building is the Cathedral Amiens. I have a picture of this building before me, a fine example of the Gothic. Several times during the past week as I passed a big ant hill I destroyed it as much as possible, but lo, when I visited it again in a few days it was restored. I destroyed the hill five times and five times the busy ants swarmed out and began the restoration. This passion for restoration of the ant hill caused me to think of Amiens Cathedral for it has been destroyed, once by the Vikings, twice by fire and at last demolished by lightning. Each time the patient lovers of this beautiful building swarmed out of their homes and shops and raised the beautiful towers to heaven once more. It contains many sacred treasures, among them being the head of John the Baptist. This relic is shown during some of the religious ceremonies. Benjamin Disraeli, England's great premier and egotist, says, "It has been my observation that the most successful man in any undertaking is the man who has the widest information." The other day I saw three women or mayhap girls picking berries and their position made me think of "Gleaners" by Millet, now hanging in the Louvre. On Washington's Birthday I saw posed "The Angelus." One may see pictures any day, if one only has a bit of imagination. Calves blating. Perhaps they want water. They did. E. L. Hall after air. Seth Corse driving to Citrus Grove for our mail put off thorough error or carelessness. Wonder what they drink on the Portsmouth Limited. John Heisey with a broken finger. Tried to make a calf go his way. Never has been done. Sometimes I think "isn't it wonderful to be so popular and then I think it's hell." Anyway, Mary Louise sticks with me. Two weeks ago I wrote that "some would be duller" and now it is Mrs. Charles Ethan Duller. A long and a happy and a prosperous life is my wish for these two people. Berries are ripening fast and in the absence of that miserable wretch who is loafing around the pobster [lobster?] palaces in Dallas, it is up to us two to can them. We start in this very day. Does a hen sit when she sets or does she set when she sits and if so what happens when she sat? Put-put-put-put? It's Oscar Chapin leaving for Markham to open a tonsorial parlor. Thus the burg shrinks. Looks as though us men would have to join the House of David. A few doses of tetrachlorethylene would do some folks a heap of good. The McNeal family preparing to move to Kingsville. Fine family for any town. A Tribune reader in Cocoa, Florida, writes that "Thoughts" give Collegeport News and he likes to read it. Helps to prove that "a prophet is not without honor except in his own country." Brickbats at home and bouquets from abroad.
Miss Bobbie Mildred Chiles driving in her Dodge touring with her sister, Ella Mae, at the wheel. Tommy Hicks practicing ditch jumping in the dark. Ora Chapin shipping some fat fryers. Nothing doing with Guinea pigs as yet. The library is a cool spot on a warm day in charge of Mrs. Crane is neat and clean. If the Mr. Harkey, recently employed as manager of the Bay City Chamber of Commerce, is the Doctor R. M. Harkey I used to know when both of us were in the extension service of the A. and M. College, they made a very wise selection. I have known Doc for several years and know that he is a hustler, a go-getter and I believe that Bay City enters upon a new era as soon as Doc hangs his hat on a Bay City nail. Just call him Doc. Well, it is Saturday, the last day of Lent, and I just saw my old friend, R. J. R., coming down the road and was glad to see him and give him hearty welcome. He is a brother or uncle of my lady nicotine. J. B. Heisey buying baby chicks. Ladies of the Woman's Union holding a bake sale. Recalling the story I wrote some weeks ago about my dog Pete I have just read something that may be of interest to dog lovers. It concerns Archdeacon Wilberforce who was one of the earliest foes of the evolutionary hypothesis of Darwin. As the story goes, the Archdeacon was visiting Sir John Tare at his seaside home at Overstrand and Hare who was a lover of dogs asked, "Do you really believe, Archdeacon, in a hereafter for our dogs?" "Indeed I do," said Wilberforce. "But do you mean that I shall really see my dog again?" asked Hare. "Undoubtedly, if you are good enough," was the reply. Say, fellers when the cow comes in, in the morning after a night of heavy dew and her tail soaking wet and when you sit down to milk and she wraps said tail around your neck, say isn't it a grand and glorious feeling? No fun milking a cow with a split teat. It means a fight twice a day. Plenty of opportunities to say, "??()26(!!!??-)" but it being Easter I only said damn once. More of those contemporaneous eggs being shipped. Good stuff. Hope the hens will continue being contemporary, coeval, coexistent. We had colored Easter eggs for breakfast, thanks to some good people in San Antonio. They also were contemporaneous. My wife, the miserable wretch, writes, "I will be on my way home in a few weeks." Guess I'll have to kill a hen or a guinea pig the day she arrives just to show my appreciation of the woman who has been a loyal and satisfactory wench for more than thirty years. Nuf bunk for this week.
Matagorda County Tribune, April 22, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
That imaginary zone, sometimes called the waistline is to be raised this season. If the skirt follows the zone, suffering cats and kittens, but what will happen to us fellers who are not blind? Nearly every spring I have noticed myriads of flying ants, that filled the house, and have often wondered what they were, and what was their business. This year they came into our house in countless multitudes all flying in one direction. As they fell on the floor I swept them out and I am inside the truth when I state that in one hour I swept up six quarts. Here is the reason for this remarkable flight. It is the time when ants marry. They are on their marriage flight and honeymoon. There are three kinds of ants in this section--the workers, the winged males, whole life is short and merry and the young queens. When favorable weather arrives the winged males and young queens leave the nest and start their marriage flight. The queens lead the way and are followed by the males who in thousands are devoured by birds, some drop from weariness but the young queen flies on until the strongest of the males catches up with her and mating begins. The lucky male, is also an unlucky male, for he dies soon after the mating and the queen returns to her nest, where she eats off her wings as they are now useless for she never again leaves the nest. Her sole business now is to lay eggs for a few hours are the mourners left the meaning of the pest of flying ants. It is their marriage ceremony and the winged ants that infest our homes for a few hours are the mourners left behind. While I lived in Mexico I was much interested in a species of ant which made periodical raids on our corn bin. They came in countless numbers and carried away considerable grain. One day I caught one of them and weighing it found it weighed one-half grain and yet it was carrying, left aloft free from the ground a kernel of corn that weighed two and half grains. This was five times its weight and in man terms means that a man weighing one hundred and fifty pounds could easily carry seven hundred and fifty pounds. Isn't life wonderful? The past week I found two quail nests, three dove nests and one nest the eggs of which I was unable to identify. Two of the dove nests were made in the low ground bordering Pilkington Slough and the high tides of the past few days have of course destroyed them. The tide is perhaps three feet above normal with a stiff soeaster blowing and this gives Collegeport a big lake. Mocking birds are building, also orioles, red winged blackbirds, scizzor tails and two different kinds of wrens. English sparrows are chattering and fuming because I destroyed a nesting place they selected in my fireplace. Isn't life wonderful? Here is a new one on me. It is said that a ring around the moon means there will be doughnuts for family cats. I shall watch for rings. When Mrs. Charles Judin lived here I could smell her doughnuts and when I told her about it she often brought me a mess. Wonder where the Judins are now. Oscar Chapin spent Sunday at home but Ora is a widow once more. John Bunyun wrote "Pilgrims Progress" more than two hundred and fifty years ago. Wonder if he knows that one of the copies of the first edition sold for $34,000.00? The Allens caught a red fish the other day that must have weighed close to twenty-five pounds. E. L. Hall says that is nothing for he caught one that weighed fifty-eight pounds. The Allen fish was good eating. Wonder when the new grocery stock will be ready for customers. Have enjoyed communion with my friend, R. J. R., all this day. Seth Corse is also his friend. Wish every Protestant and Catholic would read Al Smith's letter published in the Atlantic Monthly. It is a clean cut, lucid, easily understood, sane, sound and intelligent statement of his position as regards church and state. Governor Smith is a high type of an American citizen and would make a most excellent president of the United States. I have little patience with the voter who refuses to vote for a man simply because he may be of a different religious faith than the voter. Be he Jew or Gentile, Catholic or Protestant, the only measuring stick should be, is he clean, honest, capable, is he a good American. I am for Cal but I can't have him give me Al. I admire Al Smith. "Ankles Preferred" is now playing at the Majestic Theatre in Houston. "Ankles Common" would be a better title. That wonder woman, my second mother, Phoebe Ann Van Ness, used to say, "Always speak the truth, but it is not necessary to talk all the time." The world would call her a "mother-in-law" but she was more than that, for she was a real mother to me. A boy asks, "If a toad has a tail would it keep him from jumping or help him to jump as a tail does a kangaroo?" Send answers to Puzzle Department, Tribune. Cowards write letters to which they attach no signatures. An anonymous letter is a cowardly, filthy vicious thing. Some folks ought to be built like a Buick, "valve in the head." Merit often turns up in unexpected places. Lots of women would like to settle down in Lapland. The Owls playing at the Boeker-Sims dance Tuesday lost a perfectly reliable, efficient trap drummer. Searching party here early Wednesday morning. Maybe he eloped for this is the fashion these days. Anyway, the high tides brought plenty fine fish up Pilkington Slough or rather, Collegeport Ship Channel. As the Mopac has recently renewed its contract for shell with the Seadrift people there is no probability for any shell business at this port. The dream of a channel, a turning basin, a loading track, of several families coming in here is all bust. It now turns out that no one blocked the shell business and here is where I find use for the word "anfractuosity" which Webster defines as "a state of being full of windings and turning." Macauley says, "the anfractuosity of his intellect and temper." Some one was troubled with anfractuosity. That's all. Cecil McNeil home for a few days. This young man is bound to make the Mopac a splendid engineman one of these days. Cecil was practically brought up in this burg and all are interested in his success. Hugo Kundinger trying to get Bay City on the fone. Hugo fishing. Isn't that like a man? I found three contemporaneous eggs yesterday, my boarder Sport found the nest. Mrs. Oscar Vernon Chapin entertaining The King's Daughters. They went home well fed. Wonder what was done for The King. Fig orchards are beginning to look clean. I have just read the speech delivered by Frank McManamy of the Interstate Commerce Commission at the 34th Annual Convention of the Traveling Engineers Association and he told many interesting facts among them being this: "In 1925, there were but 171 killed and 4952 injured while traveling on the railroads of America." Then he says, "To state it in another way, in the year 1925, one passenger was killed for every 311,569,782 miles travel and one was injured for every 7,379,331 miles travel." He further states, "In 1925 there were 19,954,000 automobiles registered and there were 2206 killed and 6555 injured." Interesting statements. Dr. Darwin, in his "Botanic Garden" published in 1791, anticipated the invention of the locomotive by writing--
"Soon shall thy arm, unconquered Steam! afar Drag the slow barge, and drive the rapid car."
Isn't life wonderful?
April
"Then tender greening of hill and plain, The driving, pelting rain; Then turquoise skies, and golden suns; For April's here again."
I do not know the author of this but we have experienced the driving, pelting rain and now are ready for the turquoise skies and "damned by the man who cries, hold enough."
"O life! thou art a galling load, Along a rough, a weary road, To wretched such as I!--Burns
Let's all get busy now and aid in promoting the county-wide bond issue and it will not be long before there will be no "galling load, along a rough and weary road" between Collegeport and the balance of the world. The extra cost is nothing for life is too short at best. Let us enjoy good roads here for we know nothing about the roads overthere. One of my readers said, "Mr. Clapp must love animals for he wrote such an interesting story about his dog Pete." She told the truth for I do love animals, birds, flowers, women, children. I love God and all the wonders of His creation. I have been 14,640 feet in the air, 1800 feet underneath the earth and always have I found something to love, always something pointing the way to God. God rest Pete's dog soul. They found the drummer. This means "The Owls" will come again. The other day a woman said, "Where did you buy that steak?" And the answer was: "I got if off the butcher." Getting a steak off of a butcher is a new thing for me, yet it might suit a cannibal all right. I rather have my steaks off of a beef critter. Found a baby killdeer this morning. It was taking its first flight lesson. As I picked it up the parents swooped close to me and began ugly talk which continued until I placed the baby on the ground and withdrew. The killdeer belongs to the plover family and its food contains largely of insects such as grasshoppers, crickets, and boll weevils and for this reason should receive protection. Please don't shoot the fiddler. He is doing the best he can.
Matagorda County Tribune, April 29, 1927
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The following letter, although immensely appreciated, came to us yesterday as a distinct surprise. We know Mr. Clapp will, also, appreciate it:
Central & Southwest Utilities Co. 1100 Allen Building Dallas, Texas
April 19, 1927
Mr. Carey Smith, Editor Bay City Tribune, Bay City, Texas
Dear Sir:
Through the files of the Central Power and Light Company which is affiliated with our company I have had the opportunity to read your publication. I have found in its pages regularly a literary gem, "Thoughts," written by Harry Austin Clapp of Collegeport.
I have always been much interested in the specialty columns and feature aspects of newspapers but in this contribution I am sure there is more of human interest than in efforts of a similar nature in metropolitan publications. The thoughts are surely true to life, expressing honestly and with conviction the things which are so much a part of modern community life.
I am indeed sure that this feature adds materially to your readers' interest as it has to mine, and I commend you for its inclusion each week.
I should like to know Mr. Clapp as much as I should like to know George Ade and his contemporaries.
Very truly,
C. C. Harmann, Treasurer
Matagorda County Tribune, April 29, 1927
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Matagorda County
Tribune, April 29, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
Ordinarily there is only one head on the shoulders but the other night I saw two heads on one shoulder. In an auto at that. How ignorant some people are. A woman reader up in North Texas did not now what I meant when I wrote that I was enjoying communion with my old friend, R. J. R. At last she found out and she informs me that "Prince Albert is running to catch up with R. J. R." The Prince will never catch up so long as he is fifteen to ten. Ask Seth Corse. Say wasn't that some splendiferous bouquet that feller in Dallas sent me via Carey Smith? Send me flowers while I am living and can enjoy their sweet perfume. Hens cackling. At the request, nay, order of Mary Louise, I went out and brought in two lovely contemperaneous eggs. L. E. Liggett sent out about twelve dozen of same kind Friday. All white outside and in with a yellow center. Egg yolk always looks good on whiskers. Shows what a man "et." Oscar Chapin down again for a visit with his wife. His put, put, like all Fords "takes him there and brings him back." Picture show last night, Jim Hubert and his friend Lee from Houston fishing, taking girls to the show and catching skunks. I have the skunk nailed up in a box. Wish some one would take him off my premises. He stinks or stanks or something that smells worse. Offered him to Ora Chapin and suggested that she cross him with her guineas. The word "skunk" is really a misnomer for the gentleman's name is just plan "spilogale putorius." Under either name he smells the same so what is the diff? Just finished reading The Gentleman from Indiana, by Booth Tarkington, an interesting and vivid portrayal of a small town in the late eighties and how it was revivified by a young newspaper man. Full of every day humor of American rustic and small town life. One of our young girls said she would not read it because not enough conversation. Conversation is the sauce and trimmings of most fiction but descriptions are the solid meat and this book if full of wonderful descriptions that cause the characters to live and breathe. My third reading of this splendid story. I shall read it again some day for it is so clean and wholesome, just like the sweet breath of Spring's first breeze.
"Hush! 'tis he! My Oriole, my glance of Summer fire Is come at last. --Lowell
The orioles are building. What beautiful birds they be, clad in ruddy gold and black. It is said that Lord Baltimore, discouraged by the troubles of his settlements, saw vast flocks of orioles, and being struck by the beauty of their plumage took the colors for his own and they therefore ever after bore his name. Before mating the male calls, "Will you? Will you really truly?" Isn't it a beautiful love song? In nest building the female is the weaver and with consummate skill she weaves gay, colored threads and scraps of cloth into her nest and hangs it high on the top-most branch. Ever examine the nest of an oriole? I like cats but I kill those that kill birds. Every bird killed by cats is an economic loss to our section.
"Do you ask what the birds say? The sparrow, the dove, The linnet, and thrush say, "I love, and I love!" In the winter they're silent, the wind is so strong; What it says I don't know, but it sings a loud song. But green leaves, and blossoms, and sunny warm weathers, And singing and loving--all come back together, But the lark is so brimful of gladness and love. The green fields below him, the blue sky above. That he sings, and he sings, and forever sings he, "I love my Love, and my Love loves me." --Coleridge.
I don't know whether Doc Harkey is an M. D. an L. L. D. or a Fiddle Dee Dee, but I do know that he understands how to doctor many of the ills that affect the farm. He has stored in his coco many prescriptions that taken according to directions will alleviate, allay, pacify, assuage, soothe, mollify and palliate. Farmers, poultrymen, truck growers, dairymen, will do well to call Doc. Men will do well when writing to a wife not to address her as "my dearest wife." She might ask how many wives he has. "Friend wife" is safe. Picking berries gives "pulex penetrans" a great opportunity to work on me. He is often called "chigger" but no matter results are what counts and he obtains them. It is the female that does the work, proving that "the female of the species is more deadly than the male." Listen to this: "The tall, distinguished-looking man stood with his back to the rail, his hands thrust deep into the pockets of a tweed coat. His thin, handsome face was calm, though he stared down at the pale gold hair, the violet eyes of a famous beauty, he appeared unmoved." For the Lord's sake tell us why they all wear tweed coats and the women have violet eyes. A vast heaving. I have looked into black eyes, blue eyes, brown eyes, and all sorts of eyes, just never into violet eyes. You bet your life, when I have a chance at violet eyes, I shall not appear unmoved. I'll follow up. Ora Chapin received the first communication by "air mail" the other day. I was written on a postal card while it should have been written on fly paper. Plantus says, "We lose things [certain] by pursing things uncertain." A sure prevention from divorce is soft speech. This is not meant for this burg for there are no men here to be divorced. It is an Adamless Eden. About the only difference between Collegeport and New York City is that the latter has more buildings and more people and some of the buildings are higher. That's all so let's cheer up. The Allens bringing bread and ice but no Ostrea Virginianas. It's tuf but to become immortal we must die. Cecil McNeil all dolled up in railroad clothes reporting at Kingsville for work. If we really believe what we profess to believe, why fear death! If we believe, then it becomes the door to a greater and finer life. Death is a natural transition and God in His wisdom and mercy prepares us for the change. If there is adventure in this life, there is greater over there. Commencement Thursday, school program Friday, and Saturday a big school picnic, and same night a picture show. Great week. Paul Janes back from Houston. Bud Conover going to prayer meeting, says this is the dullest place on earth and that he will pray for something to liven it up. This morning I observed three spider webs, span between the fence wires. They looked like beautiful lace doilies and with the dew glistening in the sunlight as though sprinkled with diamonds. Gosh, but I'll be glad when that miserable wretch, who is my wife, gets back. I feel sorry or Joe. Carl Boeker, taking his little son out for a ride. John Heisey the proud owner of a little colt. Plenty of people will assist a man to make a fool of himself. To those who believe this burg is fast on a reef we advise the reading of the 36th verse of St. Mark, chapter five. No man is ever great until a cigar or hair tonic is named after him. I know men whose names should be on tooth paste and tooth brush. Francios Villon, one of the three rogues, says, "I know everything except myself." We have a new musical prodigy in the person of Les Craig. He sure can make a piano moan, groan, talk in musical tones that are pleasing to the ear. The more good music we have the higher standard of life. Music hath charms, etc. A man passing with a predatory nose and acquisitive chin. Telegram, ”Barbara Jane arrived last night, weighs seven pounds, both doing well." Old residents will be interested for the mother is Anna Davis Van Ness. This makes me a Grand Uncle. Isn't life wonderful? I am a Grand.
"On parent's knees, a naked newborn child, Weeping thou sat'st when all around thee smiled; So live, that, sinking in they last long sleep. Then then must smile while all around thee weep." From the Sanscrit of Calidus by Sir William Jones.
Speaking about chiggers, a feller said, "Parasites take; they never give." He knew not of what he talked for they gave me the itch. A woman reader of this column, living in North Texas, sent me a bag of P. A., hoping I would throw down my good old friend, R. J. R. The odds are too great. Ask Seth Corse. Mrs. Emmitt Chiles and Bobby Mildred 10 1/2 pounds, going to the school picnic. In Mexia, they have organized "The Nestli? Company." Room for such a concern in this burg. Gus Franzen enjoying his daughter's paper at the graduation exercises. Louie Walters pulling on his crooked stem pipe.
Jack Holsworth is good to the young people. He gave them another party the other night. Mrs. Merck sitting in her auto and writing letters. Mr. Sam Sims with his men cleaning up the library grounds. Fine work. Mary Louise having yeast for her celebrated Parker House rolls. Hens cackling. More contemporaneous eggs. John Carrick getting water. New school board begins its term. When John Heisey goes out at night with his horsemobile he obeys traffic rules and carries lights. Saw no license tag on his machine. Wonder why? Several years ago a woman sent me for a gift a suit of pajamas and never have I received a gift that brought me so grief, regret, woe, tribulation, anguish, misery, distress, for I never to this day have been able to explain to that miserable wretch who is my wife. Now I must go all through said grief, etc. etc., etc., again for a woman Tribune reader in Texas in her exuberance, superabundance, lavish, profuse, delight in these poor Thoughts, sent me the other day a suit of pajamas. Shivering flounders, how will I square myself this time? Mary Louise believed my tale but that miserable wretch--gosh! when she comes home and I attempt to wear the said pajamas, I believe she will again leave me. I guess I will call them "majamas" and perhaps that will fool her and I can get by. If any of the men who read this column have suggestions, for the sake of men standing together, send 'em along. Just now all I can cry is, Help! Help! O Hell, where is thy sting? Until trouble begins I thank the lady who was so thoughtful, after that, I dunno.
"We hear it calmly, though a ponderous woe, And still adore the hand that gives the blow." --J. Pomfret.
Matagorda County Tribune, May 3, 1927
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At 6:30 I heard Herbert Hoover speak over the radio on the flood conditions and an appeal for the Red Cross and it was fine. Immediately following his address Al Jolson broadcast for the first time from Chicago (Mr. Hoover from Memphis). Mr. Jolson did it for the flood sufferers asking every one who heard his voice to give ten cents. He told stories and sang songs, among them being What About Baby, April Showers, What Does It Matter, Me and My Shadow. This last song he composed on Thursday and this was its first presentation. I was so thrilled that the feeling will last forever. His singing is beautiful, a wonderful voice and I took it all in. Following that the radio stations in Dallas broadcast request programs, each request to be accompanied with a check for the Red Cross.
The announcer gave the name of piece, person and amount of check and I declare, they came fast. After Al Jolson's entertainment the announcer was busy giving names and nearly every one said that Al Jolson's recital was worth much more than ten cents and amounts ran up to $25. The Farm Bureau was in business session and phoned in for a piece to be played and would send a check for $125.00. You may be sure a selection was played. It was very exciting and interesting to me. This is May Day Mercy Day and all churches and theatres give total receipts to the Red Cross. One ice cream firm gave their total receipts for the day and a representative of the Red Cross will be at the Crescent ice cream place all day to receive the receipts announced by radio. The Central Power and Light Company sent a check for $250.00. Mr. Hoover told of the exact situation and it made my heart ache.
Matagorda County Tribune, May 6, 1927
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Jimmie Murry, Mamie Franzen, Francis Isle [Eisel], [and] Lery Hunt were graduated from the grammar grade to high school. The community house was beautifully decorated for the occasion. The salutation was delivered by Milburn McNeil in a creditable manner and Jessie Murry delivered the valedictory address. Both were well rendered and the subject matter showed that much thought had been given to the subjects. It is not known what the plans of these young people are but it is understood that each will seek higher educational advantages. Matagorda County Tribune,
May 6, 1927 |
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Collegeport, May 7.--The Collegeport Industrial League held its nineteenth annual meeting last night and elected the following board of directors: E. L. Hall, president; S. W. Corse, vice president; Geo. S. Welsby, treasurer; H. A. Clapp, secretary; S. B. Sims, L. E. Liggett and Frank King, directors. The secretary reported a satisfactory sum in the treasury. Among the activities of the past year are the building of two culverts on the road to the cemetery, placing a cement walk for the Woman's Club Library, putting water on the Library lot, turning over $11.25 to the King's Daughters which organization has charge of the cemetery, building a toilet for the Library, taking out a membership in the Gulf Coast Good Roads Association, planting trees and shrubs on the Library lot and many other "little things." The secretary reported that for the year he had received 487 pieces of first class mail and sent out 612 and of second class mail he had received 62 and sent out 197. At this meeting steps were taken to encourage and foster truck growing and a committee was appointed to make an attempt to secure contract between some good truck growers and land owners. This organization is in full accord with the Bay City Chamber of Commerce and welcomes its aid and will give complete co-operation.
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By Harry Austin Clapp
Collegeport, Texas, May 11--A critic says that I am a liar and that this stuff is a bunch of lies. He told the truth for once in his life for I am a liar and some of this pardentar? grist is a bunch of lies. For instance a young lady purchased two pounds of beans from Verner Bowers and asked how long it would require to cook them and Verner being well posted on housekeeping quipped "three? hours." "Too long," said the lady, "take out one pound and then it will take only one and half hours." If you don’t believe this ask Verner. A fellow asking for work said "I don't suppose you don't know nobody who don't want to hire nobody to do nothing, do you?" The bull-bat (chordeiles virginianus) is a bird with little attraction and yet is of great economic value for it feeds largely on air insects, devouring mosquitoes by the millions. Flying ants, killed when they are preparing to propagate the species, grasshoppers, potato bugs, chinch bugs form a large per cent of his diet. It never eats grain or fruit. He is not fit for food. These things make him a valuable aid to man. I have counted as many as fifty-seven between this place and Bay City perched and often wondered why the peculiar position. If you have never observed a bull-bat perching do so at next opportunity. You will find that he always sits lengthwise of the perch. Instead of crosswise as is the case with all other birds.
A preacher addressing his congregation the first time said, "I have come here to heal the dead, cast out the sick, and raise the devil." Must have taken a dose of home brew. The windows of the empty stores still look like the glazed eyes of a corpse and when the sun strikes them they seem for a moment to have life and to beg for resurrection. Well, anyway, that miserable wretch who is my wife, writes that she will soon begin trekking homewards and in the language of Joe, "I don’t' know what to do with myself." It would be great if she came walking in unexpectedly.
I miss your voice, your laugh, your song. I miss you at night and all day long. I know that without my wonder, sweet wife, There would be little charm in my life. Come back, come back to me, I say. And let us love again one more day.
Didn't know I was a poet did you? Doggone the ground is hard as well as hard as, O, hell, how can I describe the hardness.
"For I remember a man stopped by the way Watching me dig holes in the hard, hard clay; And with his all-obliterated tongue He murmur'd--"Gently, Brother, gently, pray!"
For this I apologize to Omar for the liberties taken, but it tells the story. Oscar Chapin on milk diet and bumming couple of drinks from muh. Brought in fifteen contemporaneous eggs. Fine scrambled, fried, poached or medium boiled.
Judge Jones of Bay City rubbering about the burg. Mary Louise buying R. J. R. Mrs. Fleming Chiles leaving for Houston to meet Fleming. Hattie giving pedestrians a ride. E. L. Hall loading up with his usual rations for daily lunch. Monday night, organization new school board. Tuesday night meeting of the Egg Association. Wednesday night prayer meeting. Thursday night Industrial League annual meeting. Friday night picture show. Saturday night rest? Dunno The Perilous Adventures of Prince Charles Edward in his attempt to recover the throne of his ancestors rivals any modern fiction. Landing with only nine companions, in nine months he gained possession of the capital and part of the kingdom. At last beaten, his escape furnished thrilling stuff for the reader. No less thrilling is the story of Charles II to regain the throne lost by the execution of his father, Charles I. These stories are not only true history, but as exciting as those written by Zane Grey and they are educational and appeal to the imagination.
"Active in indolence, abroad we roam In quest of happiness which dwells at home; With van pursuits fatigued, at length you'll find, No place excites it from an equal mind." --Hor-Elphinston's Trans.
Thus begins an essay entitled, Discontent a Principal Cause of Unhappiness, by Samuel Johnson, L. L. D. I have recently read this essay and it is so full of thoughts that just fit local conditions that I wish everyone of our burghers might read it. Dr. Johnson writes, "The general remedy of those who are uneasy without knowing the cause is change of place; they are writing to imagine that their pain is the consequence of some local inconvenience and endeavor to fly from it, as children from their shadows; always hoping for some more satisfactory delight from every new scene, and always returning home with disappointment and complaint." Isn't this truth. how often we have seen this in our own community. Calves blatting, hens cackling, cows lowing, horses neighing. Must be rain a coming. The ruins of the bank building still point skywards white accusing fingers. A Texas woman writes me, "Was wondering why you were not thinking this past week for I was mighty impatient for The Tribune to get here but it came at last so I was made glad. The Thoughts were fine and enjoyed by all of us. I am cutting them out to send to some friends." Isn't that a fragrant bouquet? I always called him Joe and never knew until Monday night that his full name was Joe Green. "Why, hello, Mr. Green, it's nice to see you again." Party of Goliad and Collegeport kids to Portsmouth, Sunday for one of Mrs. O'Neal's famous chicken dinners. Fried chicken, new potatoes, cabbage with cream sauce, preserved figs, 'n everything. That he never repented that he held his tongue, but often that he had spoken. Funny things in many advertisements. Here is one, "Any person who can prove, that my tapioca contains anything injurous to health will have three boxes sent to him free of charge." Melvin Spoor taking two of the fair sex to the show at Blessing. The peas in Seth Corse's garden afflicted with some new and unknown disease. The Allens with a lot of Cranyon Vugarts for sale. Big fellows, some weighing two pounds or perhaps much less, I guess the latter. Over at Palacios they are caning them under the common name of shrimp.
"Patience is a remedy for every sorrow." Publilius Syrus
Mrs. Carl Boeker opened her home Tuesday night for a dancing party with fifteen young people present. Music by the Craig Orchestra. Hugo's refreshing ice cream with Mrs. Boeker's cakes served. Ben Mowery is now president and Mrs. L. E. Liggett, secretary of the school board. Oleanders are blooming today. Tomorrow the cape jasmine will fling its fragrance to the air. Pastures covered with wild flowers of every hue. "They help to make a bit of Eden, in a corner of God's room." Isn't life wonderful? I enjoy reading that golf gargle. Tom Hale fixing windows in school house. The gray dawn of a new day. The red on a white face looks garish. Two color lips. Wonder why? Each day fig orchards are cleaner, leaves bright green showing health, promising a goodly crop. John Carrick shipping beans. Ben R. Mowery driving to Palacios. Paul Janes running the drug store as assistant to Hattie. Hugo mulling over his account books. The Collegeport Industrial League was represented at the Bay City "pep luncheon" by Ben R. Mowery and H. A. Clapp and we are glad we went for we were not only well fed, treated royally, met old friends and enjoyed the talks by Erickson, Harkey, Smith and Mattison. These talks were pithy, terse, concise, forcible, illuminating. E. L. Hall started but suffered from a flat and was lost on the way. Glad to know that under the new management the Bay City Chamber of Commerce is ambitious to reach out and cover the county with its influence and attempt to persuade, lead, incite, arouse a spirit of co-operation especially for projects of county-wide interest. Kimble Roberts with his wife visiting the Chapins. Jack Holsworth taking a bunch of girls to Palacios for the movies. Doctor Harkey booked like a regular practitioner in his new suit. Often wondered why tack the word "City" onto Bay for up to this good time it has been nothing but a provincial village. Today, thanks to the progressive folks who live in the town far from any bay it has earned the right to use the word City. With the paved streets, bright lights, beautiful trees in the square, nifty up-to-date store fronts it sure looks what it is a progressive promising, growing young city. When I looked at the beautiful trees, their branches waving and bending in the breeze I thought:
"The shadows of the trees! Therewith what visions come! there the soul sees, No man's world, but the good green earth, and bears Strange sylvan melody dreamlike that strays Content among the shadows of the trees."
Anyway Bay City is a beauty at night. From the sky it looks like diamonds sprinkled on green plush.
A portion of the credit is due The Tribune for Carey Smith has pounded away for years about paved streets. "It is a good thing to remember and a good thing to do work with the construction gang and not with the wrecking crew."
A boy went into the First National Bank the other day and asked for Mr. Lewis and on his appearance with his usual smiling face in front, the boy said, "Mr. Lewis I want a check book for a lady what folds up in the middle." Mr. Lewis said, "I'll furnish the check book, if you will supply the lady." Wonder what she looks like. The only way to regenerate this burg is to do the thing which lies nearest us, and not hunt after grand, far-fetched ones for ourselves. Collegeport day will be observed by a community dinner and barbeque. Bring your baskets of grub and throw in and
"O! it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an 'Tommy go away; But it's "Thank you, Mister Atkins, when the band begins to play." --Kipling
A fair good time for May 25 is what we want. "When the band begins to play."
That miserable wretch, who is my wife, is coming home and I've "lit a light" for her. Isn't life wonderful?
The Daily Tribune, Thursday, May 12, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp
"He that many bokes redys Cunninge shall he be, Wysedome is soone caught; In many leuys it is sought; But sleuth, that no boke bought, For reason taketh no thought; His thryfte cometh behynde. --From "The Kaleder of Sheperdes." 1528.
I wonder how many of us would enjoy going back and living in the time when there were no books. As for me, take away my books, deprive me of eyesight and the blessed privilege of reading and life would lose most of its charm. What story more thrilling than that of King Alfred, who started the world's first agricultural school at Ox-ford, now the great Oxford University. Then for us is the story of that great Swedish King, Gustavus Adolphus who saved Germany from Catholicism. For solid, hard to digest stuff, we can read the essays of Doctor Johnson. The life of Peter the Great and how he worked as a common laborer in foreign shipyards, in order that he might know how to build a navy for his own country, furnished an example of constancy to an ideal that we all might emulate. I could name many more of this character, all of which I have read, but--
"For why, who writes such histories as these Doth often bring the reader's heart such ease, As when they sit and see what he doth note, Well fare his heart, say they, this book that wrote!" --John Higgins
I have often read of mermaids and wondered how they really looked, how they lived, what language they spoke, how they made love. I saw four of them yesterday. I suspect they were brought into Matagorda Bay by the high tide. One was green, one black, one brown one gray. They sported in the waves that washed our shores and I heard them laugh joyously. I saw them shake the brine from their heads and at last they came to land and I asked them from whence they came and what names they bore and they replied, "Mary Louise, Louise, Mamie and Minnie Lee." I shall watch the shore again in hopes of seeing these fascinating mermaids some other day. Not all preachers are good business men, but Bishop Quin is a great business bishop, because before he took orders he was in successful business. Have been reading some of Sherlock Holmes' adventures by Conan Doyle and I must confess that they become quite tiresome. They have a sameness that bores me. The Heart of the Hills by John Fox is splendid and clean fiction. A tale of the Kentucky Hill people, probably the purest stock in America. Some shooting, because a feud is woven into the tale, romantic love, sweet and clean. Good for young and old. Inez, a tale of the Alamo by Augusta J. Evans, is, to use a vulgar term, "far-fetched," at least the way I judge it. I can not imagine any one using the language of the conversation which is a considerable part of the book. Not good stuff for Catholics to read for 'tis pretty much anti. Allens bringing bread and ice to the beleaguered Collegeports. Mary Louise teaching the Vacation Bible School. Ah! There is Garibaldi, born in 1807. He loved peace, but was ever ready to fight for it. A soldier of fortune, aye, I might say a pirate, a stealer of a woman, a liberator of Italy. If one wished a romantic love tale read how he won his wife and how she followed him in his campaigns. His heart was sealed in a casket and on it was inscribed "Open this casket and there you will find engraven on my heart Italy." To come back to this generation, what more thrilling fate than that of Booker T. Washington. A man any race might be proud to claim. A wonderful tale, fantastic, full of sentiment, the craving for the completion of a living ideal. Fredrick Froebel, one of the world's greatest teachers, was born in a Thuringian village, April 21, 1832. Some one said in derision that "Those who can, do; those who can't teach." Some truth in this but Froebel had a passion for teaching and he taught. "The same savagery, chilled with fear, that sent Richard Wagner into exile, crushed the life and broke the heart of Fredrich Froebel." In spite of this his name and works go on and on. Mr. Percival going with the mail. Cow men branding cattle. Girls looking on. Tommy Hicks throwing the rope for their amusement. Robert Murry, the old-timer, slings his string and catches them every throw.
"The readers and the hearers like my books, But yet some writers can not them digest, But what care I? for when I make a feast I would my guests should praise it, not the cooks. --Epigrams by Sir J. Harrington
It is true that our national rubber resources are rather limited and 'tis a pity, for with short skirts we have more use for rubber that ever before. The other day I read that an aviator said that now man can do everything a bird can. Wonder if that includes laying an egg? One of our girls asked, "What did Harold Bell Wright?" The same thing that made Oscar Wilde. Well, anyway, the way to secure information is to ask. The Mercedes Tribune says, "Figures need not frighten us. Texas alone could feed the world and have much left over." Mr. Madison speaking at the pep luncheon, said, "Put a wall about Texas and we would starve to death in thirty days, because we are now sending out of the state $123,000,000 each year for things we ought to produce." Wonder which is right. I think we all brag too much. In the last analysis, we are, as individuals and as a people, living on a mighty fine margin.
"The lamp in the living room was burning Quite low, and in my heart there is a yearning For a sight of the Queen of my heart From her I never, never will again live apart." --Fragments from Hack.
As a real friend of the farmer, the quail probably has no equal and on the contrary man is the quail's worst enemy. As the young birds are fed insects to the exclusion of every other food the quail is especially valuable during the nesting season. As near as I can estimate, about 100 "Bob-Whites" live on or near my place and of all the birds that I see from day to day in none do I have more pleasure. It is estimated that in the states of Virginia and North Carolina there are 354,820 quail and that from September 1 to April 30, they consume 1341 tons of weed seeds. Who is able to estimate the value of this seed destruction to the farmer? This day I have seen three different waders, brought in, no doubt, by the high tides, red winged blackbirds, mocking birds, oriole, tree sparrow, sizzor tail, red bird, killdeer, quail, mourning dove, meadow lark, cardinal, humming bird. In spite of this, a woman of this town, has said she never could like Texas, because there were no birds. No birds! look! they are here, there, everywhere if one will only use one's eyes.
"Children are the anchors that hold a mother to life." --Sophocles.
Doctor Sholars is one of the few men who can tell a woman to open and shut her mouth and get away with it. Seth Corse selling stamps, thirteen for a cent, and a quarter. Wonder when hotel building will begin. Mrs. Merck going to Palacios.
"The gifts of a bad man bring no good with them." --Euripides.
Woman's Club meeting with Mrs. S. B. Sims. This means a good time for all who attend. A crooked scam on the hose means a crooked looking leg and if a man persists in looking at such views he may expect a permanent distorted vision. A well shaped leg with finely molded ankles is something worth looking at. I enjoy the sport and so do all the boys although some may say, no, but they are only common liars. For the sake of suffering catfish I hope the girls will see that seams are straight and thus avoid the appearance of boy legs. Not satisfied with skirts that are nearly necklaces a ballet master from Chicago suggest that those favored with shapely legs, slash the skirt from knee to waist. If this suggestion is adopted we will have little to guess about. John Sutherland and Charles Yeamans here in the interest of good roads. Meeting held at Citrus Grove with Judge Harris and other good roaders. I enjoy historical romances like The Conqueror, Blennerhasset, Josephine Empress of the French, Alice of Old Vicennes, Mistress Joy, a Tale of Natchez in 1798. These tales not only appeal to one who enjoys love stories but they feed to the reader history in sweet doses that are easily absorbed. Dorothy Crane, our young musician, teaching a pupil, said, "If f means forte what does ff mean?" and the answer came eighty." Smart kids, these Collegeporters.
Friday evening Library Day, Mary Louise drew some books and one of them was Mistress Joy. On the first blank page is inscribed these words: "For Mr. Richard P. Hobson, with the compliments of Annie Booth McKinney, Knoxville, Tennessee, October 19, 1901." This is the Captain Hobson who blocked the harbor of Santiago during the Spanish-American war. The book should be handled lovingly.
"A book of Verses underneath the Bough, A jug of Wine, a loaf of Bread--and Thou Beside me singing in the Wilderness-- Oh, Wilderness were Paradise now!"
Ho! Hum! Glad this grist is off my chest.
Matagorda County Tribune, May 20, 1917
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Thursday I was the honor guest at a luncheon given by the Pierian Club with Mrs. John Wesley Baird, editor of the Woman's Page of the Semi-Weekly Farm News, as hostess. The luncheon was given at the Dallas Country Club, a very exclusive place and the swellest in the city. About two hundred ladies were present. The tables were beautifully decorated with the club colors, green and white, tall green candles, green glassware, white flowers massed as centerpieces. The menu was: green and white paper baskets filled with salted peanuts, celery, olives on small plates, fruit salad on head lettuce, the salad molded and colored green, half broiled chicken, asparagus with butter sauce in cases, rolls, coffee, ice cream bisque in cases covered with whipped cream.
The program was fine, every performer in the musical portion being an artist.
This was the program:
Invocation - Mrs. J. J. Lans To Our President - Mrs. Lloyd Smith Response - Mrs. Eugene Bullock Early Days of the Club - Mrs. J. C. Muse The Junior Pierians - Mrs. R. H. Shuttles Our New President - Mrs. Bullock Response - Mrs. W. W. Mannin Barcarole - Rubenstein & Humoresque - Leschetizky - Mrs J. B. Rucker Reading - Selections from original poems-- Mrs. Margret Bell Houston Probert a. Water Boy - Robinson b. May Magic - Stratton - Mrs. Ella Pharr Blankenship
Nell Gwyn Dances - Edward German - Mrs. Perry
Davis, Mrs. C. C. Jones, Mrs. J. B. Rucker Mrs. Baird looks fine and she is some personage and very popular. One lady present who lives on Mocking Bird Lane (very swell street) has invited me to a luncheon at her home with Mrs. Baird as the other guest.
Matagorda County Tribune, May 20, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
"In the spring a livelier iris changes on the burnished dove; In the spring a young man's fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love." --Tennyson.
Of all the birds that grace our fields there is no more attractive one than "zenaidura macroura," or the common mourning dove. In an economic sense it is a great friend of man for it is a destroyer of insect life and weed seeds. It ranges from Panama to Ontario. The nest is a frail one, in this section usually placed on the ground. Eggs are pure white and glossy and as a usual thing two in number. An examination of 237 stomachs was found that 99 percent consisted of seeds. In one stomach was found 7500 seeds and in another 6400. In many sections this harmless and valuable bird is considered game and many are slaughtered. Figuring in dollars and cents it is a foolish farmer who will kill or allow killing of this beautiful and valuable bird.
"Every sound is sweet; Myriads of rivulets hurrying through the lawn, The moan of doves in immemorial elms. And murmuring of innumerable bees." --The Princess, Cant VIII--Tennyson.
This year I have found several nests, in none more than two eggs ad in one nest only one egg. The Portsmouth Limited running special to Vanderbilt on Sunday. Mary Louise and E. M. C. (full name omitted by request) teaching in Bible School. Too modest. Revival services at Citrus Grove attracting good crowds. Why is it necessary to revive religion? Must be many backsliders. Well, that's the way with man. He makes many promises to be good and falls. Just like Adam. There are more than 500 kinds of humming birds but only sixteen are known to live in the United States. She lays two eggs which are hatched in fourteen days and in three weeks (not the three weeks Eleanor Glynn wrote about) they are ready to leave the nest. Wonder when the new grocery store will open for business. Hattie fiddling with the fone and selling yeast. Some used for bread but perhaps not all. Bond election this week. Wonder how most of the Rubes will vote. Old Creole Days by Geo. W. Cable. Eight splendid stories of old New Orleans. Interesting, historical, full of tragedy, plenty of loving. The Palacios fire siren blowing for noon. My clock a nickel slow. Thank you, Palacios, for the time, this time.
"At seven o'clock when the day is done I think of you, And wonder if when you are through, You dream of home and when you will sit here too." --Fragments from Hack.
The girls who attend Camp Allen this year may expect to use the new three-season beds. No spring. One of Dr. Wagner's patients asked, "Doctor, what are my chances?" and Doc. replied, "Oh, fairly good, but don't start any continued stories." Last night the moon rose about the time the sun disappeared behind Palacios. It rose in all its majesty, like a great red yellow orange, and as the sun sank in the west one could see across the face of the moon "sunkist." That is one with imagination could see. Isn't life wonderful? When I looked at the moon I saw God. It is said that when Judge Harris sat on the bench trying his first case he was very much annoyed by the confusion and rapping smartly on his desk he said, "Order gentlemen, order." And a juryman, just aroused from his nap said, "Egg sandwich and cup of coffee." Do not vouch for the truth of this but "they say" it is true. Maybe not. The kiddos are much pleased with the daily vacation Bible school because pictures are used. The awning in front of the School block being wrecked. Wonder if this is further destruction or beginning new construction. Seems as though disintegration in this burg had gone far enough towards sufficiency, capacity, plenty, abundance. E. M. (full name omitted by request) trying to dress make and so far a good job. Wish Betty Hart would tell us how to sit, or set, or sat a hen so she will stay sit, sat or set. Miss Mayfield, our capable county nurse, rubbering about to see how our health averages up. E. L. Hall on his way to the Galveston Girls Revue. Hope he catches one of those Spanish or Italian beauties and he will if they get close enough. L. E. Liggett and Gustave Franzen going to the good roads meeting at Bay City. E. M. C. (full name omitted by request), Lera Hunt, Dorothy Crane, and Minnie Lee McNeil won a trip to the state C. E. convention at Fort Worth because they were the four highest in Bible study during the school year. They will be accompanied by Mrs. Paul H. Janes. Paul Janes' dream came true and he left Thursday for California. Hope he has a happy and prosperous time. Don't see how we can have good coffee the 25th, if George Braden does not make the grade. The girls want Paul to come also. Some of our boys playing poker. Wonder who got dusted. Improvements order of the day. A new galvanized awning for the Sholl block. Thank Seth Corse for this. The bathing girls revue is with us once more but now comes the "perfect lip" color. As I have had many years evidence in lip work and consider myself a connoisseur hope I can work in as one of the judges. 'Tis pleasant work.
"I think the Vessel, that with fugitive Articulation answer'd once did live, And drink; and Ah! the passive lip I kiss'd, How many kisses might I take--and give! --Omar.
I care naught for passive lips. Give me the moist, quivering, ripe red lips of the passion flower. Lips that give back all they receive and plead for more. It's a great game, boys, if you know what I mean.
"What is love? 'Tis not hereafter; Present mirth hath present laughter; What's to come is still unasure; In delay there lies no plenty,-- Then come kiss me, Sweet-and-twenty, Youth's a stuff will not endure." --Shakespeare
Obliged to give this stuff in small doses, in order to get by the proletariats.
Not long ago the Bay City council turned over city affairs to the boys for the day and shortly before that the council of Kingsville did the same thing. Probably none of the officers realized what danger they incurred when they did this. Listen: the first time such authority was delegated to another was about 1950 years before the Christian era, about 400 years after Noah's flood and about the time of Abraham. Ninus was king of Assyria and it is recorded that one time in the extravagance of his ardor for his Queen, Semiramis, he granted for, a day, absolute sovereignty of his empire to Semirais. He seated her on the throne, placed his signet ring on her finger and issued commands that for a day all of her orders should be obeyed. Her first act was to order Ninus imprisoned and strangled. She then declared herself the successor and retained the supreme power until her death. She is the first female sovereign recorded by history to have held an undivided empire. Pat Thompson and his councilmen better take warning from the fate of Ninus. I am not going to the Galveston bathing beauty revue. Can see some peachy legs at home and any night can see a bathing girl revue down on the beach. No use of me going to Galveston to see legs. Mrs. Jim Hale selling eggs at 15c. Has 235 chickens. No excitement over election. Woman's Union having a bake sale. Frank King buying a beef for the barbecue. Ben Mowery in Houston. George Welsby coming early to vote. Minnie Lee and E. M. (full name verboten) riding horseback.
Arthur Matthes selling gas, lube and kero. Bob Thompson riding a tractor and cultivating figs. Back and forth, back and forth, all day he goes like a shuttle thrown in the loom. The figs seem to appreciate the service for they look up and laugh, the while putting on their green and setting the young fruit. Hope the canning factory runs night and day this season and it will if Sam Sims has his way. The high tide yesterday drifted in four mermaids and three hemaids. One of the beautiful mermaids cut her tail, no I mean her foot, on a shell. King's Daughters meeting with Mrs. Liggett. Wish I was a King's Daughter. Jack Holsworth advising how to build the awning on the Sholl block.
"Bowed by the weight of centuries he leans Upon his hoe and gazes on the ground." --Edwin Markham.
Saw four of them this day gazing on the ground. A member of the present legislature stated that in Dallas 8,000,000 bottles and in San Antonio 30,000,000 bottles of home brew were made last season. If malt syrup is taxed $5 per gallon it's bound to bring much sorrow to home brewers. Then there is the misguided wretch who plans to tax tobacco. It seems that when a feller just gets to sitting pretty and enjoying some of the necessities of life some smart aleck jumps in and knocks the joy business. With a pipe of R. J. R. and a bottle of home brew any fellow may be quite content. In a few days a tax on coffee will be proposed. Lots of people in this world who delight in laying down rules for the lives of the others. If I don't like dogs, forsooth, no one may own a dog. Doggone such argument.
It is history that Queen Isabella of Spain was the first to institute military surgeons to attend an army and be present on the battlefield. She also provided six large tents, furnished with beds, and all necessary things for the sick and wounded. This expense was all paid from her private revenues. L. E. Liggett's broken leg does not interfere with his duty as an election judge. Tom Hale moving into the country. Hubert Boeker driving a swell Cadillac. It has lots of defiddles on the instrument board. Hugo Kundinger very dignified as presiding judge of election. Watching an ant hill the other day I observed that they had cut a road from the hill out into the tributary territory for about 150 feet. It was about four inches wide and clean and hard and over it they transported provisions and supplies for the inhabitants of the hill. As I looked at it I thought if even the ants build roads why should not human beings have roads which will give access and exit? "Hateful to me as the gates of hades is he who hides one thing in his mind and speaks another."--Homer. Teacher enjoying a country school teacher's salary. "Children, each of you will bring an egg tomorrow I will show you how Columbus made one stand on end. And if you can not bring an egg, why just bring some ham."
"Come back, come back, my Honey Chile, I'm so lonesome all the while. Don't you know I want you here And look in your eyes so dear?" --Fragments from Hack.
Dr. Samuel Johnson in an essay entitled Memory Brings Satisfaction, has this to say, "As the satisfactions, therefore, arising from memory are less arbitrary, they are more solid and are indeed, the only joys which we can call our own. Whatever we have once reposited, is out of the reach of accident or violence, nor can be lost either by our own weakness or another's malice."
"Be fair or foul, or rain or shine, The joys I have possess'd, in spite of fate are mine, Not Heaven itself upon the past has power, But what has been, has been, and I have had my hour." --Dryden.
Matagorda County Tribune, May 27, 1927
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In the junior polo race Leslie Chiles took first place and in the senior event Roy Nelson. Tommy Hicks won the horse race. Bob Thompson won first in the relay race.
People were here from various
parts of the county, the Bradens,
This makes the nineteenth time the people of the community have assembled for this purpose and it is considered a fixed event.
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
Someone has said, "Nothing in this world is so cheap as a newspaper, whether it be measured by the cost of its production or by its value to the consumer." I am writing now about an American, daily and county weekly of the first class like The Bay City Daily and Weekly Tribune. It's so good and so cheap no one living in Matagorda County and in this day of progress can afford to be without it. There are other county papers possibly as good, but none better, and none just like it. It prints all the real news of the city of its publication, of the county, and lots of world and national news--the news you care for--every day and then collects the cream for the weekly. You can read it every day and do your day's work, too. It is edited by a democrat, but is independent, gives all political news free from party taint and its columns are open to all who desire to express their views on any proper subject. In a word--it's a complete, condensed, clean, honest country and family sheet and it not only circulates in Matagorda County but in nearly every state of the union and some foreign countries. It comes as near being the ideal home paper as we are likely to find on these "mortal shores." What a void there would be in life, if we were deprived of the daily, weekly home papers, the farm journals, the monthlies? Using the usual rule I estimate that more than 3000 people read The Daily Tribune every day. Don't you wish you were one of that 3000 who keep in touch with county affairs? Suppose it does print things you do not like. What difference does that make? Did you ever read any publication which you could not criticize?
"I saw a smith stand with his hammer thus, The whilst his iron on the anvil cool, With open mouth swallowing a tailor's news." --Shakespeare.
Methinks Gus Franzen knows what I wrote about a few weeks ago for I found him this morning digging holes in the hard, hard clay and close beside him stood Louie Walter, observing the hardness of the clay and smoking his crooked stem pipe. Sam Sims rushing gas to his tractor. As you read this--
"That miserable wretch is in San Antonio And our hearts are singing soft and low. The King and Princess are waiting here, For the wife and mother who is so dear." --Fragments from Hack.
Anyway, it's been a heluva a long time and we are glad her time is up. We hope she won't get pinched while in the town of Saint Anthony. A newspaper is only good for today. Yesterday it wasn't. Tomorrow it was and only good for waste paper. "How fleet the works of man." At times it seems a pity to set up type for a day's use and then, bang, it all goes in the melting pot to reappear as new dope on the morrow. A continual building up and tearing down. With all that it's the lever that moves the world.
The other day I was reading of the past when newspapers were unknown and the only printed matter circulated were pamphlets setting forth the views and ides of the author only and that is the reason why I am "thoughting" this week about newspapers. I much rather live now--this day--the best of my life--the day when an American flies across the Atlantic in a day and half--and we all know about it within an hour. Newspapers render this great service. Well, the mail is in and in a few minutes I will have my daily letter which satisfies the day. Girls rehearsing for the "Society Circus" to be given Friday night. Lera Hunt on the bill as a clown. Bet she makes good. E. L. Hall home from the bathing girls revue. Miss Denver caught him. Hoped he would land the "Eyetalian" girl. Oscar Odd says that the trouble with New York is that one can't keep away from folks. We Collegeports have the same trouble only ours is getting next to people. The two towns are very much alike. The former has more people, a few more buildings and some are taller but that is about all the difference.
"There never was in the world two opinions alike no more than two hairs or two grains; the most universal quality is diversity."--Montaigne.
Now that the bond issue is settled comes a diversity of opinion as to the route which the Collegeport lateral shall take. Instead of spending valuable time in argument, why not tell the engineer to build this lateral on the shortest and cheapest route? This will save lots of unnecessary rag chawing. Just found a new word, "chenopodiaceous" and you fellers better look out for I intend to spring it some of these days. Don’t know yet what it means but its something about eating. Perhaps we have all been eating this "chenopodiaceous." Pat Richmond smoking a boy size pipe. Says his rice is fine. Louise Walter going to Austin for summer study. Mary Louise is on the circus bill as snake charmer. If she is as successful charming snakes as she has been charming me, she will have a very docile snake to handle. The Collegeport Fig Orchards Company has sent from Florida 106 hibiscus which have been set out around the library grounds and in front of the community and school houses. These shrubs cost about $30 delivered and is another example of the interest the company has in beautifying Collegeport. Emmitt Chiles in his role as barbecue cook. He has made up a spicy mess for a basting. The Society Circus will be sent two very interesting features in the persons of the "rubber skin" ladies. One of these attractions I interviewed and asking how she discovered that her hide or perhaps skin was elastic she replied, "When I was about eight years old I found that I could stretch my skin several feet and practice has increased my ability." Some nifty cake Mrs. Boeker fed the Leaguers on Thursday night. Two "jiners" and so grows the organization which does "little things." I feel sorry for the home into which no newspapers go and I often wonder how the inmates of such homes are in touch with any event outside their own little circle. Every family should read the county weekly, take at least one daily, several farm or trade papers, the splendid monthlies should be liberal patronizers of the public library. Supplied with these it is easy to meet other folk and join in conversation along most lines.
"And the Cock crew, those who stood before The Tavern shouted--"Open then the Door!" You know how little while we have to stay, And, once departed, may return no more." --Omar
And, once departed, we return no more. This seems to be a very good reason why we should employ every medium by which we may cultivate our minds, keep ourselves in touch. We know what we have here. No one knows what we will have over the river. Do they have daily and weekly newspapers over there? I think they do for souls that can progress to a living in heaven certainly will use the press. Those who go to hell will have no use for it except to keep the fires burning. No time to read. Jack Holsworth and Ora Chapin playing the rubes at the circus. E. M. C. (full name verboten) doing the ballyhoo for the fortune teller. Raymond Roth borrowing wash boards and tubs at 9 p. m. Wonder if he found a woman to go with the outfit. Some persons have the ability to speak in Italics. We have one or possibly two in this burg who can do it to perfection just as though they were native born Eyetalians. Great art but it never brings in much bacon.
Every person who attended the Collegeport birthday dinner felt a keen disappointment in the non-presence of Doctor Harkey. I suspect the threat of rain restrained, constrained, limited, prevented, prohibited, in other words prevented the trip. When we have that nine foot sidewalk this will not occur. When? John Heisey hunting pipe with which to run water onto his estate. I am ashamed to give the particulars of one exhibit at the circus. It was marked for men only and for this reason was well patronized. It was simply awful, dreadful, fearful, horrible, frightful or to make it very plain, if you know what I mean, scandalous. Tom and Barbara Hale moving to Wadsworth. Hate to lose two such fine young people. Verner Bowers putting a new spring in his auto. He carries too heavy a load for a Ford. Two daily papers, several weeklies and monthlies, breed papers come to me each month and I enjoy them all but say, when my daily fails to appear I feel as though a good friend has passed me by without recognition. The library yard is beginning to be a beauty spot. Looks to me now as though next Wednesday will be a great day. Isn't life wonderful? I'll say so. The other day I burned a lot of old newspapers and as the flame started, grew, roared and romped I thought, "So fleet the works of man, back to their earth again. Ancient and holy things fade like a dream." I felt no sorrow at their passing, for had they not carried the message and served man well?
Advertisers take notice that the nine-foot sidewalk about which we have heard so much discussion runs by the Matagorda farmers' front door. Increase your space, change copy often, make the text snappy and above all else give prices and tell the truth.
"Why," said another, "some there are who tell Of one who threatens he will toss to Hell The luckless Pots he marr'd in making-- Pish! He's a Good Fellow, and 'twill all be well."
Matagorda County
Tribune, June 2, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
In recent reading I find two men for whom I am sorry. One is the man who seduced Lucy Hanks. Lucy was a beautiful girl, with a character that was filled with loyalty, for never did she reveal the name of her betrayer. Her parents used force and argument but to no avail. Lucy was the mother of Nancy Hanks who was the mother of Abraham Lincoln. No one knows the name of Lucy's lover but he must have been a man of splendid qualities and a strong character for together through Nancy Hanks they bred a man who is known throughout the world. This man might have come unknown as Mr. X, the unknown quantity of Abraham Lincoln but he is only known as Mr. X, the unknown quantity. What opportunity he missed by failing to measure up as a man. The other was also a white man, but like the other Mr. X, by concealing his identity, he threw away his chance for immortality. The mother in this case was a slave and three times she had stood on the auction block and sold. The result of this romance of a white man and a slave woman was the birth of a little half white Negro boy also a slave. The Negro kids with whom he played called him Booker because he loved an old spelling book and they added the name Washington so he became Booker Tallaferro Washington. All the world knows Booker T. Washington and the great work he established and all the world knows Abraham Lincoln but who knows of the men who were responsible for their existence. It is assumed that they were both happily married men so called respectable citizens, but we know not their names, their position in life or their character. All we know is that they became Messrs. X and so I say, "Messrs. X, I wear crepe for you this day, for you sold immortality for a moment's passion." I would enjoy writing a story about these men but my space is limited and have other thoughts.
"Men at some time are matters of their fates; The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, But in ourselves, that we are underlings." --Shakespeare
Emmitt Chiles praying for me. Thank you, I need prayers. Mr. Janes, Senior, preaching while his son is on vacation. Oscar Chapin here for Sunday and drinking with me. Salud Oscar! Mighty nice when that nine foot sidewalk runs in an interrupted line to the City of Diamonds. Ask John Sutherland about the diamonds. Mary Louise looks fine bending over a washboard. Good exercise. Leslie Craig leaving for Port Arthur where he will join a ship of the Merchant Marine. Wonder if he will have a piano to use. Hope so for he is some tintinnabulator on the ivories. "The pessimist says, 'Business is not half as good as it would be if it was only half as good as it is.'" The optimist says, "Business is twice as good as it would be if it was only half as good as it is." Mr. Fralely of the Houston Packing Company selling meat and butter and beating to Matagorda for the night. The Allens bringing a load of ice, feed, groceries to Collegeporters. This they do twice each week. Burt Hunt looking for a new home for his family. Mr. Swansey buying the Herbage place from Seth Corse, agent. His brother moving here from Riviera with a car of fine dairy cows, farming implements, household goods. He moves onto the Olson place. Emmitt Chiles and Geo. Welsby turning carpenters.
"Last night the train brought home my Honey Chile And I intend to keep her here for quite a while. She talked and talked and talked so fast I wondered when she would be through, she was at last. It's wonderful to have her here For all is joy and not one tear." --Fragments from Hack.
Ben Mowery taking Emmitt Chiles out to view the Colorado River. Louie Walters selling cucumbers, I mean giving them away. John Carrick threshing dried beans. Mrs. Chiles and Bobby Mildred taking the air via auto. Sam Sims hauling water with which to irrigate the trees set out the last week. Mary Louise looking up rates to Camp Allen. Samuel Johnson, L. L. D., wrote many essays and among them is one entitled "Promises of Secrecy Should be Inviolable." It is good stuff, a trifle difficult to digest but once assimilated enters the mental circulation.
"And let not wine or anger wrest Th' intrusted secret from your breast." --Hor-Francis' Translation
"It is related by Quintus Curtius, that the Persians always conceived an invincible contempt of a man who had violated the laws of secrecy; for they thought that, however he might be deficient in the qualities requisite to actual excellence, the negative virtues at least were in his power; and though he perhaps could not speak well if he were to try, it was still easy for him not to speak." In other words, as my Mother Van Ness used to say, "When you speak, tell the truth, but it is not necessary to talk all the time." 'Tis a wonderful thing to be able to intrust a friend with your confidence and know it will never be violated. The miserable wretch who is my wife has been home two days and is still unpacking her trunk. I knew she would grow tired of that Dallas man. She confessed that she loved him but that she loved me more. Isn't life wonderful and as John Billings used to say, "Wimen is queer critters." My niece (Anna Van) sent me a copy of The Sea Hawk by Rafael Sabatini. I saw the movie at Fort Worth and because of that was glad to read the story. It's a red hot, sizzling tale of the sea in the time of Queen Elizabeth. Lots of fighting, selling of slaves, loving and being loved and all through is woven historical facts which but add to the interest. Well worth reading and I thank the mother of that wonderful baby, sweet little Barbara Jane.
"Genius is nothing more than our common faculties refined to a greater intensity. There are no astonishing ways of doing astonishing things. All astonishing things are done by ordinary materials."--Hayden. This sort o' knocks the romance out of the statement that a man was born a genius.
They say that the new orchestra at the dancing pavilion, Palacios, is not at all like "Chesterfields." I have always liked Senator Bailey of Cuero. He is a dandy good sport but his defense of Dan Moody makes me almost love him. While that miserable wretch who is my wife was in Dallas she learned to make drop biscuits. They are delicious and I have names them "Kenos." Recipe will be supplied by the cook editor, Tribune. Most of the boys who call on girls are unable to walk from the car to the front door and ask if the young lady is at home. Having lost the use of their legs they indolently idle in the auto and honk the horn, expecting the young lady to hike out in the dark and meet them. A gentleman will call at the door, ask for the young lady, step in, meet Pa and Ma and make known his wishes. When they pull this stunt at Homecroft they may honk till hell becomes an icy pond. No self-respecting girl will leave the shelter of her home to answer the honk of an auto whose drive lacks the first instincts of a gentleman. No, Pauline, the Newspaper Thoughts were not written at the request of Carey Smith. Just my "Thoughts" and I do not know if Carey Smith agrees with them or not. Mr. Paul Janes expected home in time to take the Bible student girls to the Fort Worth convention. The rising sun this morning was a beautiful spectacle. It rose behind a bank of clouds that looked like a great grim castle with battlements surmounting the top and as the sun peeped over the castle its rays coloring the tops of the clouds as though an artist had taken a gigantic brush and dabbling it on a great palatte, splashed the colors of a rainbow across the sky. And then I thought--
"Wake! For the Sun who scattr'd into flight The Stars before him from the Field of Night Drives Night along with them from Heav'n and strikes The Sultan's Turrett with a shaft of Light."
"Before the phantom of false morning died, Methought a Voice within the Tavern cried, 'When all the Temple is prepared within, Why nods the drowsy Worshipper outside?'" --Omar
Two much reading is like too much eating, useless unless digested. One of my readers objects to the comparison I made between New York City and this burg. Said it gave a wrong impression. He did not explain which village was wronged. Here is another comparison: New York City has a hotel while Collegeport has none. Outside of this there is very little difference. Same air, same sea washes the shores of each. The people of each wear clothes, eat food, drink water, milk, home brew, and bootleg whiskey and shoot craps, children go to school, people attend church, lovers pass fond glances. O, yes, they are quite alike. Mrs. Welsby handing out hamburgers and coffee. Hugo Kundinger putting away some new stock. Ora Chapin visiting the Homecrofters. Wonder if the high tide will not at last bring rain. John Carrick and Mrs. Welsby shipping eggs. The nine-foot sidewalk should be routed as defined in the election call, from Collegeport, via Citrus Grove, to connect with the east and west highway by the shortest, cheapest, route, and the exact location should be left to the engineers. This is no time to squabble or fuss over routes. And, again, we have no money to squander in round about ways. The layman knows nothing about modern road building. Better leave such things to men who know. Citrus Grove and this burg should stand together on this proposition and resist any efforts to change the route. If it is changed the road is open for injunctions and the Lord only will know when we will have the sidewalk. Kipling said, "The strength of the pack is the wolf and the strength of the wolf is the pack." This applies to road construction and should appeal to the reason of all our citizens. Let's stand together. Isn't life wonderful?
Matagorda County Tribune, June 10, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp. Collegeport, Texas.
I had about made up my mind to quit thinking about legs, much as I admire them, but The Independent, a national weekly, uses considerable space on the subject and some of it I object to. The writer states that 90 per cent of all feminine legs are ugly, or in other words, ill-looking, unsightly, hideous, unlovely, and in defense of legs I feel sure that the writer never saw the legs we have right here in Collegeport. It is true, we do have some of the styles described as "grand piano," "channel stake," "salt sack," "bandy," " bow," and "knocked kneed," but we also have the style known as "beef to the hoof," "slim lizzie," "slippery cat." But the gods be praised of these classes there are only a few. The vast majority of legs in this burg are refined, polished, genteel, elegant, classical, exquisite, chaste and delicate. In other words if you know what I mean, they are easy to the eye and leg lovers delight to gaze upon them. Some legs are hideous to look at, ghastly, grisly, dreadful, shocking, but these only reckon up about 10 per cent, leaving 90 per cent lovely to gaze upon, contributing the joy of life, giving opportunity for exercising the "neckel" muscles. Oscar and Ora Chapin leaving on a truck for Markham, the truck carrying their chickens, guinea pigs, cats, bed and other household goods. Bonita and her two children left in care of Mary Louise. It is related that once upon a time Mr. Barnett of Bay City cut a customer's hair and charged fifty cents which the customer paid, remarking, "Your charge is shear robbery." As with many other thoughts, I do not vouch for the truth of this statement but you my ask Barnett. What would Collegeport do without the Allen ship line operating between the City by the Sea and this busy port? Little Barbara Jane is developing into a very precocious child. She sent me a tracing of her hand. Something remarkable for a five weeks child, but then look at her parents. Emmitt Chiles taking two young ladies to a dance at Palacios. It is related that an artist was asked how he developed a beautiful statue from a marble block and he replied, "Simply by cutting away the marble I do not need." Some legs are like that. If we could cut away the surplus, excess, remainder, we would have a beautiful leg. This day I have seen the two types--one pair that would stand considerable cutting away and the other, to my notion, the finished product. I never miss the chance to rubber at a nifty pair of legs but with it all I agree with The Independent that skirts should be longer but not for the same reason. The Independent desires them longer for the benefit of the producer of cotton and the textile manufacturers while I wish they might be longer so concealment would leave something for the imagination. That miserable wretch who is my wife had a gorgeous time in Dallas and San Antonio but she developed an independence which I do not enjoy. Every time I attempt to use my authority as her lord, she informs me that if I do not like what she says or does she will return to Dallas. Shivvering flounders, what is a man to do? The only way to handle a woman is to keep her under subjection for once she gets away from discipline she is a lost gosling so far as the head of the house is concerned. Therefore, I say, "I dunno about these trips to foreign parts." Mary Louise is planning to leave me for two weeks at Camp Allen. Wish Nancy B. was here to go along. Nancy loves carrots and they serve them twice each day. That's why Uncle Judd does not visit Camp Allen. Dorothy Crane, Minnie Lee McNeil, Lera Hunt and E. M. C. (full name verboten) under chaperonage of Paul Janes en route for Fort Worth Christian Endeavor convention. If fifteen eggs are placed under one hen and the result is three live chickens, how many hens must one set so as to produce one hundred live chicks? Ask Betty Hart. Some one said, "There's many a slip between the cup and the lip," but 'tis nix as between the modern girl and the gazing eye. The Misses Helen Hudson, Lois Bullock, Blanch Howard and Tylene Gentry are four very beautiful girls and in one piece bathing suits show figures to suit the most fastidious but as we are "thoughtening" about legs and must use our eyes we have with these girls something considerable like "murine." Yes, I said, like "murine." It is difficult to choose between eight so near perfect legs but as I have had years of experience it is my judgment that one of these has legs about as near perfect, finished, unblemished, blameless, faultless, exquisite as may be grown. They simply are dreams.
According to figures given by the U. S. department of agriculture, milk cows in every state of the union showed an increase in value of from ten to twenty per cent over 1926 and the average for 1926 was $65.65 while for this year it is $71.98. Milk prices have been rather stiff, especially for the better grades and for certified. Each state has shown a decline in price of eggs over prices of 1926. Last year the average price is .203. I suspect that deducting transportation, cartons, crates, the producer receives about .045 less than prices given. The reader will wonder what this has to do with legs. A cow has four legs ad a chicken two legs and without them there would be no milk or eggs. Yes, legs are of much importance.
"I have read of legs divine, Have heard of legs refined, I've seen them superfine, But none so beautiful as thine.
To me they are so sweet, Molded in lines so neat, In winters cold or summer's heat, To gaze upon them is a treat." --Fragments from Hack.
Francis Bacon in an essay on Of Vainglory has this to say, "It was prettily devised by Aesop, the fly sat upon the axle-tree of the chariot wheel, and said 'What a dust do I raise!' So there are some vain persons, that, whatsoever goeth alone or moveth upon greater means, if they have never so little hand in it, they think it is they that carry it." The essays of Bacon and Johnson are mighty good stuff to read during wet weather for one is sure to keep dry. But say, don't they tell the truth? People in those days were just about the same as present day folk. In every burg we have the fly sitting on the axle-tree. I must qualify by excepting Collegeport for here we have no axle-trees but we do have a few flies. According to reports by the bureau of agricultural economics of the United States department of agriculture the per capita consumption of milk and cream for the year 1920 was 43 gallons and for the year 1926 55.3 gallons. With this increase in milk consumption there has been a steady increase in health conditions. Isn't life wonderful? More milk drunk, better health.
Serenely full, the epicure would say, "Fate can not harm--I have dined today." --Sidney Smith.
North Cable painting up the iron work at the canning factory. Guess the company getting ready for the season's canning. Good work anyway. With a good rain, figs will look up and promise a fair crop. Bud Conover buying stamps. If you are interested in the Chinese muddle and want the high and low on this international problem, read Imperialism: War Inside Jobs, by Richard Washburn Child, in the Saturday Evening Post of June 4. Very interesting, readable, and carries the conviction of truth as told by a man who has been on the ground and knows. I am aware that some folks think The Post is full of trashy stuff but 'tis not true. Read the editorial, The Winning of the West, The New Science of Exporting, and you will have substantial reading and no trash. Hugo Kundinger bringing in a big string of trout and croakers, and a 17-pound drum. Jack Holsworth operating a taxi for the benefit of girls. Goldsmith said, "The best way to please one-half the world is not to mind what the other half says." Within a few years linen may sell for less than cotton. The fibre and stalk of the flax plant is gummed together tightly and it requires much hand labor to separate the fibre. Now they have successfully bred a plant with a long fibre so lightly stuck to the shive that it may be separated by machinery. Flax produces more fibre per acre than cotton and for every square mile on the earth's surface adapted to cotton culture there are twenty square miles on which flax may be grown. This breeding stunt may change the plans of agriculturists and manufacturers. After weeks of dry, dry ground and plant life struggling to hold on comes rain, blessed fain.
"The thirsty earth soaks up the rain, And drinks and gapes for drink again; The plants suck in the earth, and air With constant drinking fresh and fair." --A. Cowley.
The good God sure looks after His children in His way, in His time, but He always looks after His children. Isn't life wonderful? The Woman's Cub meeting with Mrs. Ackerman. The secretary making a special trip from Markham to attend. Lepus sylvatica, sometimes called rabbit, raising hob with Carl Boeker's ten acres of melons. E. L. Hall running on two cylinders. Tom Shivers going along as mechanician. When the Bay City Chamber of Commerce makes us the good-will visit they will be well fed under direction of Mrs. Carl Boeker. The visitors may be assured that "Ab uvo usque ad mala," the supper served by Mrs. Boeker, will be a satisfier. Nuf sed. Guess this is about all the flapdoodle Tribune readers can assimilate this week.
Matagorda County Tribune, June 17, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp. Collegeport, Texas.
"What does our flag stand for today?" Thousands of people are ready to say! "She stands for country, the best on earth; She stands for progress, from the time of her birth." --Cornelia M. Dowler.
June 14 having been set aside by executive order as Flag Day, good Americans naturally think of the flag but I wonder how many know anything about its history and how it came to be the flag of this great nation. Several years ago I attended a meeting of a chamber of commerce in a town not far from Bay City. The principal business was concluding arrangements for a Fourth of July celebration and various committees whose business was the building of a float to represent Betsy Ross making the flag, rose to report and the president of the chamber asked, "Who the hell was Betsy Ross?" And the reply was "Betsy Ross made the first flag." The president then said, "Well for God's sake let's us have the float and tell Betsy to finish the flag."
It does not seem possible that a leading business man, president of a chamber of commerce in a Texas city of 2000 people could be so ignorant but 'tis true. Too bad to destroy a romantic story but the fact is that Betsy Ross did not make the first flag. There is no record of its birth; it simply grew. The first record we have is a flag designed by Benjamin Franklin and Messrs. Harrison and Lynch. This was a committee chosen to design a national flag and as a result the flag they adopted used the British Jack as a union, with thirteen stripes, alternate red and white to show that as a union united with thirteen stripes they still acknowledged the sovereignty of England. This was first thrown to the breeze at Cambridge, Mass., January 2, 1776, and received a salute of thirteen guns. The first legislative action for the establishment of a national flag was taken Saturday, June 14, 1777 as follows: "Resolved, That the flag of the thirteen United States be thirteen stripes, alternate red and white; that the Union be thirteen stars, white, in a blue field, representing a new constellation." This action was officially promulgated by the secretary, September 3, 1777, and the first time the flag was hoisted was August 3, 1777, over Fort Schuyler, on the site of the village of Rome, N. Y.
Oscar Chapin here on Sunday to shave the town mugs and cut the flappers' locks. Carl Boeker brought me a curious fruit the other night. It grew on a cucurbitaceous plant and was mighty palatable. Green on the outside, but on cutting the fruit we found the inside to be bright red and very sweet and juicy. Some folks call the fruit watermelon but 'twas fine eating by any name. No wonder Lepus Sylvatica eats a half dozen each day. Esther Schubring taking in the gulf breezes. The construction of the flag, as a design was under the personal direction of General Washington, at the residence of Mrs. Betsy Ross, No. 239 Arch St., Philadelphia, between May 23 and June 7, 1777. After Mrs. Ross gave up the business of flag making for the government the work was carried by the daughter of Clarissa Claypoole, who on joining the Society of Friends relinquished her inheritance for fear work would be used in war. The admission of Vermont and Kentucky caused congress to allow fifteen stars in the union and fifteen stripes and on January 20, 1817, by resolution, the flag was altered to thirteen stripes and "hereafter to add one star to the flag whenever a new state shall be fully admitted." The act was finally approved by President Monroe April 4, 1818, and the completed flag was first hoisted on Congress Hall at 2 p.m. April 13, 1818. Illinois was the first star to be added, Mississippi was the twentieth.
"When Freedom from her mountain height Unfurled her standard to the air, She tore the azure robe of night She mingled with its gorgeous dyes The milky baldrick of the skies; And striped its pure, celestial white With streakings of the morning light."
Once upon a time I stood on the bridge of a foreign vessel on the Pacific and saw approaching a strange ship. When it came close I saw it break out the Stars and Stripes and I must confess that this was the first time I had felt a thrill at sight of my flag. I can not describe the feeling but it seemed as though I had suddenly been transported home. I had not seen the flag for ten months and it looked beautiful to me and it has ever since looked beautiful to me. It means more.
Emmitt Chiles making Sunday afternoon calls. The school board inspecting the school house and grounds. Louie Walters shipping fine cantaloupes to Joplin, Mo. Tommy Hicks riding about with a young lady in a spiffy auto. Homer Goff in charge of services Sunday. E. L. Hall having trouble with auto valves. Every year, every man passes a mile stone in his life and this 16th of June I pass one more stone and today I am thinking of the woman who almost gave her life that I might live. I think of her wonderful sweetness, her Christian life, her tenderness, her loyalty, how at the most critical time of my life she stood by, how she never failed me at any hour, how God took her from me when I was 27 years of age. And as "thoughts" come to me I feel sure that I will see her again, talk with her, hold her close in my arms and love her as I never loved her on earth. My mother.
"While a man is growing, life is in decrease; And cradles rock us nearer to the tomb, Our birth is nothing but our death begun." --Night Thoughts by Dr. E. Young.
The flag was saluted by a foreign power for the first time, aboard the Ranger Captain Paul Jones, at Quiberon, France, February 14, 1778. It was first displayed at Constantinople on the frigate George Washington. First displayed in British ports on the ship Bedford, February 3, 1783.
Robert Murry riding a prancing horse and dressed like a Mexican Vaquero. Percival sporting a new slicker. Seth Corse handing out parcel post packages and collecting the C. O. D. Bless the man who invented parcel post and C. O. D. Misty rain falling from gray skies.
The flag was displayed in Japan for the first time on the ship Franklin, December 14, 1798. First trip around the world on the ship Columbia, leaving Boston, September 30, 1787 and arriving home August 16, 1790. First shown on an old world fortress April 27, 1805, at Tripoli (the fifteen star flag). First around Cape of Good Hope by the steamer Midas, left New York November 4, 1844. First to go by steam to England on the Massachusetts from New York, September 17, 1845. Until 1866 all flags were made of English bunting and the first flag made from American materials, by American workmen was flown over the capitol at Washington, February 21, 1866. This flag was twenty-one feet fly, by twelve feet hoist, made by the United States Bunting Co., Lowell, Mass., and the gift of Benjamin F. Butler. I have never been on an operating table and when I hear women telling about their numerous operations I almost envy them. Some of them have had nearly all their organs removed, scraped, renovated, sewed up, sterilized, made aseptic and put back for further orders. Seems to me that some people have all the glory in this world. "Those who always speak well of women do not know them sufficiently. Those who always speak ill of them do not know them at all."--Pigault-Lebrum. Boys taking the girls out to Gus Franzen's for a watermelon feast and brought one to me. Thank you. The sun rising a big globe of red gold coloring the clouds in a most extravagant manner. A sight worth rising for and enjoyed mostly by cow milkers. If Thomas McM. Clark reads this, it is to tell him we wish he would come home and open his store. I would mean a well needed service to some of his old friends. Emmitt Chiles telling bout his visit to Matamoras. According to his story he saw some strange sights. Mary Louise has gone and went to Camp Allen and how we miss her whistle and singing voice in the house. It is a wonderful thing to have such a splendid daughter and we daily thank God for the gift. Minnie Lee McNeil back from Christian Endeavor Convention and says she had a "Perfectly glorious time." In some recent "thoughts" I mentioned that New York had a hotel while Collegeport had none and at that time I thought it was a rather unique situation but I find that we can no longer enjoy the publicity of being the only burg without a hotel. We must share honors with Covington, Ky., a city of 70,000 with not one hotel in its limits. We welcome Covington to the grand army of "hotelless" cities. Maybe sometime, in the future we shall be honored with a hotel. Quien sabe? Well, the old hen came off to day twelve chicks from a baker's dozen eggs. Ask Mrs. W. (name verboten) about it. She knows. The coat of arms of the Washington family consisted of "argent two bars, and in chief three mullets (stars)." This was carried to America by the great grandfather of George Washington and always used by him. This arrangement no doubt was the inspiration that caused Washington to use it in the design of the flag for the young United States. His innate modesty forbade him to refer to it but it seems so obvious for argument. Thirty years ago President McKinley said, "Our flag has never waved over any people save in blessing," and this statement is as good this day as then. During the last few years it has waved beside the tricolor and the Union Jack. It has flown from the mast of British vessels and raised over St. Paul's Cathedral but always in blessing. Next to God it means more to us than any other symbol.
"My country, 'tis of thee." Sweet land of liberty, Of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, Land of the Pilgrim's pride, From every mountain side Let freedom ring."
Matagorda County Tribune, June 24, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp
Collegeport, Texas, June 28.--Francis Bacon was known
as Baron of Verulam, Viscount St. Alban's and Lord-High Chancellor of
England. This all happened during the time of Queen Elizabeth. "The
Queen" says the Earl of Essex, in a letter to Bacon himself, "did
acknowledge you had great wit, and an excellent gift of speech, and much
other learning. But in law she rather thought you could make show, to
the utmost of your knowledge, than that you were deep." Against this
judgment of Queen Elizabeth may be recorded the fact that none of
Bacon's decrees as chancellor were ever set aside. Among Bacon's
numerous essays is one Of Plantations. The reading of this essay
struck me as about the same line of dope as is being given to farmers by
our present day advisors. He strongly advises that the farmer should
grow his food and feed and says that no man can be a success unless he
does so. Here is what he wrote in part, "Then consider what victual or
esculent things there are which grow speedily and within the year, as
parsnips, carrots, turnips, onions, radish, artichokes, maize and the
like; for wheat, barley and oats, they ask too much labour; but with
pease and beans you may begin, both because they ask less labour, and
because they serve for meat as well as bread; and rice likewise cometh a
great increase and it is a kind of meat. Above all, there ought to be
brought a store of biscuit, oatmeal, flour, meal, and the like, in the
beginning, till bread may be had. For birds and beasts, take chiefly
such as are least subject to diseases and multiply fastest, as swine,
goats, cocks, hens, turkeys, geeses, hose-doves and the like. And then he adds, "The victual in plantations ought to be expended almost as in a besieged town; that is, with certain allowance. You see that Bacon was giving his people the same "live at home" advice that is so freely being offered this day. He also wrote a most excellent essay on planning the home grounds and building the house and he says that "a house is not always a home."
That charming, I mean miserable wretch who is my wife, left me alone while she visited the Negro "teenth" day barbecue and rodeo. Dorothy Crane and Lera Hunt back from Fort Worth and confessed to a "perfectly gorgeous time." E. M. C. (name verboten) has not reported yet for she is still in Houston. Emmitt Chiles buying stamps. Mrs. Merck writing letters while waiting for the P. M. to arrive. Mr. and Mrs. Elgee C. Van Ness worshipping at the throne of Barbara Jane. Welcome to the great order of grandparents. Isn't life wonderful? The road bond issue carried. Most everyone crazy to have the bonds carry and now kicking at a raise in taxes. Men is queer critters as well as some wimmen. Because the Gulf Sulphur Co. is a great big business is no reason why they county court should require of them more than a fair and honest tax rate. Some folks seem to always have it in for any big and successful business. Nuther hen came off Sunday with twelve chicks from a "baker's dozen" supplied by Mrs. Frank King. I like to have my hens hatch on Sunday for such chix grow larger and make the pot small? stronger. Sunday is a good day for most any project. They say, there is a new man in town as handsome as Frank King. Who has seen Jim? John Heisey digging pipe. Cloud covered sky. Looking across the fig orchards I see the home of L. E. Liggett framed in waving green trees and 'tis a pretty picture.
"To most men experience is like the stern lights of a ship, which illumine only the track it has passed."--Sterne.
If any of you fellows have never partaken of a green tomato pie you have lost out in life. The reason why all angels look fat and sassy is because in heaven they serve green tomato pie. Ask the cook editor, Tribune, for recipe. Never hear of a man catching cold from leaving off his bad habits. Miss Willard Baird of Weimar will superintend Bay View Consolidated Rural High School the coming year. Miss Baird is a graduate of an Iowa college, and holds a degree, and this should suit those who have been asking for a degree teacher.
Love will subsist on wonderfully little hope, but not altogether without it."--Scott
Just read a paper that during the year 1926 and thus far in 1927 not one application has been filed to build a residence in New York on Manhattan Island. You see the two burgs are very much alike.
"Then, with deep sonorous clangor Calmly answering their sweet anger, When the wrangling bells had ended, Slowly struck the clock eleven, And, from out the silent heaven, Silence on the town descended. Silence, silence everywhere, On the earth and in the air, Save that footsteps here and there Of some burgher home returning, By the street lamps faintly burning, For a moment woke the echoes Of the ancient town of Bruges." --Longfellow.
O, yes, the two towns are very much alike. Quite alike. Not much difference in the people either. All human beings.
I enjoy reading the advertisements and often find something interesting and funny for instance: "Free-Free! Four dozen catsup bottles with every Kelvinator purchased this month." What is the answer? What is the joke? The San Antonio Express in its industrial number uses 172 pages to express its thoughts. About 90 per cent of the matter is historical and if set up in book form, would be a valuable reference and study volume. Splendid piece of work and reflects much credit on the Express. Sam Sims bringing home stray bottles. Not catsup bottles either but more like small jars. Mrs. Oscar Vernon Chapin the guest of the Ackermans for the week. The King's Daughters meeting with Mrs. Heisey. Merrill Heisey and wife of Texarkana visiting his parents, Mrs. and Mrs. John B. Heisey. Paul Janes taking the boys on a hike in an auto. New kind of hike. After nine years of trial Jim Gibson and Della (Negroes) decided that they would marry and so procuring a license they were married Wednesday night. Reverend Paul Janes officiating. Hope Judge Lindsey reads this.
"Wedlock, indeed, hath oft compared been To public feasts where meet a public rout, Where they that are without would fain go in, And they that are within would fain go out." --Sir J. Davies.
Mr. Brazil pulling in a red fish 65 inches long or about that. Hattie and Hugo [Kundinger] enjoying flounder. "When Solon was asked if he had given his countrymen the best laws, he answered, 'The best they are capable of receiving.'" This is one of the profoundest utterances on record; and yet like all great truths, so simple as to be rarely comprehended. It contains the whole philosophy history. We in these days often criticize the acts of our lawmakers, feeling that we could have done better but perhaps after all those we have are all we are deserving of. The Allens bringing hog fish, dog fish, catfish, bloater fish, trout, turbot and several other varieties. We tried a hog and a dog and found them good eating. This grist of flapdoodle has been ground out with pain for all the week I have suffered from a bad acting tooth. It seems as though ten thousand devils were hammering on that tooth and I thought of The Raven.
"While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, As if some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door. ' 'Tis some visitor,' I muttered; 'tapping at my chamber door; Only this and nothing more.' "
Well, anyway, there has been a tapping and rapping on my tooth for a week and something more. I shall have it out and then will be croaking, "Nevermore." Folks are howling about this being the hottest day of the year and yet the thermometer on my back gallery registers 88. Why, folks, we do not know what hot weather is. Ought to be in "good old Chi" or sizzling New York these days. Bay City is given to much bragging but she can't brag about what happened at Markham Friday night. Bay City claims 5000 population and yet only 55, about 1 per cent were interested enough to make a good will visit to a neighboring town. Hope Bay City peps up a bit before she visits Collegeport. We can round up 55 any old day and don't have to invite neighbors in either. So long as I have my eyes I shall use them and so I have been looking at the pictures of the entrants in the Sylvan Beach Revue. None of them were modest, chaste, retiring, becoming, decent but one girl was dressed (?) in a skin tight, white, one piece bath suit, that concealed nothing. Concealed nothing? I should say revealed everything. I can't imagine what the parents were thinking of to allow a daughter to expose herself to the gaze of curious women, vulgar men and rogues. I quite agree with the Honey Grove Signal that womanhood has lost something. There was a time when woman was God's sweetest product and she is yet when she wishes to be, and there be some who wish to be.
"Women may err, woman may give her mind To evil thoughts, and lost her pure estate; But, for one woman who affronts her kind By wicked passions and remorseless hate, A thousand make amends in age and youth, By heavenly pity, by sweet sympathy, By patient kindness, by enduring truth, By love, supremest in adversity." --Ch. Mackay.
Ora and Oscar [Chapin] throwing in with us for Sunday dinner. Carl Boeker with cantaloupes that exhale, emit, give off, breathe out, pass off delicious odors that cause the buyer to buy more and more.
"I thought I heard a gentle rapping, rapping on my chamber door But 'twas naught but those devil's tapping, tapping on my tooth so sore."
Am still waiting for Nancy. The trains run every day between here and there.
Matagorda County Tribune, July 1, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
Went to Bay City the other day for the purpose of visiting with Doc Sholars and he charged me one dollar and grinned when he asked for it. All he did was to inject a little dope, introduce a pair of ice tongs into my mouth, twist to the right, twist to the left, give a tug or two and yanked out that bothersome tooth. He cared not for what I underwent and said one buck and he got it. Doctors are sure hard-boiled but God only knows what we would do without them. Glad to pay the dollar for now. I can enjoy R. J. R. once more even if Ben Mowery does refuse to sell three bales for two bits. Verner Bowers sells it three for two bits to that miserable wretch who is my wife but sticks me with ten cents straight. Many a man has fallen for a woman. Think what happened to Sampson. Well, anyway, I am ahead of the game for although I have lost a tooth and Doc Sholars is cuddling my dollar I am on good terms once more with R. J. R. Called at the print shop and sure was glad to see those print boys and they acted glad to see me. They are a fat and sassy bunch so guess setting up The Tribune agrees with them. Have known them off and on for fifteen years. Saw Carey and he is getting to be quite virtuous. Has cut out the old jimmy pipe. He still tries to look dignified but all editors try the same effect and to appear hard-boiled but they are all human beings under the skin. What do you think about this? Going to start a "Do You Know" column in The Trib and here is the first spasm: How many miles of railway was built in last two years? How many states took a census in 1925? How many postoffices were established in the United States in the last half of 1926? How many were discontinued? How many had their names changed? How many new railway stations were opened in the last half of 1926? How many were abandoned? How many railway stations were renamed? This is all new stuff. No ancient history about this. Send answers to Puzzle Editor, Tribune. Don't know what you will get for first prize, maybe nothing, but you will have learned a few things. No man will invest cash in a creamery in Bay City unless he knows that he can produce raw material. A creamery is like all factories. It must have raw material. For this reason if the cow milkers of Matagorda County care for a market at higher prices for their sweet cream they must co-operate sufficiently to let the proposed creamery investors know how many cows will be milked. This is too good an opportunity to pass up. If a sufficient number of cows and their product can be pledged a creamery will be built. If not then "ND," which being interpreted means "Nothing Doing." Just now the first step is up to the milkers. No creamery can possibly be a success unless it handles a large volume of output with a small overhead. The annual meeting of the Holstein-Friesian Association of America has just closed and the report shows a net worth of $431,361.28 of which $310,415.85 is in bonds of the United States and balance in cash. The income for the year was $499,975.21 and disbursements were $418,435.70. Some business but remember this is the largest and richest breed organization in the world. The breed supplies 75 per cent of the nation's market milk. It is "The Breed That Leads." O, yes, I called on Doctor Harkey. He is a wise old bird for he places the most attractive goods in front. When one enters, one sees first the sweet young girl who does the typing and after one glance, one forgets to look at Doc's map. One listens, of course, to Doc's chatter but one's gaze is directed to the northeast corner. If one could put a plate of glass in the top of Doc's head he would see is brain working, working, well just like a batch of home brew. I use this example because so many Tribune readers will understand just what I mean. Well, anyway, one of the Doctor's bugs is a creamery for Bay City and I am telling The Tribune readers that if the farmers who milk cows do not co-operate there will be one disappointed hombre in Matagorda County and when he sits, which is not often, it will be in a chair three spaces west of the beauty in the N. E. corner. Doc Harkey will not be content to simply hang around and draw his pay. When that time comes Bay City will be hunting another manager. The only thing Doc wants is results.
"Then will I raise aloft the milk white rose, With whose sweet smell the air shall be perfumed." --King Henry VI, Part II, Act I, Sc. 1, Shakespeare
Doctor has an acute attack of psycho-astral poise. It is not a fatal disease. It only means he has the ability to correctly gauge the passing of time. He knows that now is the time for Matagorda County. After Doc Sholars had my tooth out and my dollar in his picket he said, "Pardon me, Mr. Clapp, but you understand I need a lot of pull in my business." I agree with him but I still do not sabe why he needs so much twist. Here is a new one for me and I wonder if it is new to others. We have a nation within the United States. A nation of free and sovereign people. Six thousand Indians of the Six Nations hold 87,000 acres of land by the Treaty of Peace and Friendship of 1795. The treaty was signed by George Washington and gives the Indians the right to have their own government and to collect taxes from white men who come to live in its borders. The treaty reads, "As long as the sun shines, grass grows green and water runs down hill," and it goes on to state that "on the ninth day of every August the United States shall pay to the head of every family four yards of calico cloth and nine dollars in money." This is actually done by the United States each year. Here is another recipe from The Tribune Cook Department. When eggs are scrambled, just before serving, sprinkle with some bran. Try it out--it's a bran-new dish. Emmitt Chiles eating green tomato pie and smoking R. J. R. V. J. Swansey moving his dairy cows to the Green Ranch.
"For thirty-five years she has given me loyalty As could only come from a Queen of royalty, Receiving such loving, royal love, Comes only from Heaven above. --Fragments From Hack
One thing can be said for Sam Sims and that he is a gentleman. For example, the other day my bull got out and in his wanderings uprooted a palm tree. Did Sam Sims say *?*+----@! He did not. He simply said, "Mr. Clapp, the next time your bulls gets out please ask him to respect our palm trees." I talked the matter over with Senor Toro and he gave me a tentative promise that in the future he would uproot some other variety of tree. Anyway, I think, as I always have thought, that Sam Sims is one fine gentleman. I must confess that I am not, for I would have said, "zx$@%!-?'"xzytc@" and then some more along same lines. Would not have blamed Sam Sims had he sworn out a warrant and sent me to the county jail. Most fellers would have been like a baby with a boil. Gentleman Sam, I salute thee. Many funny items are printed in newspapers and here is one: Mrs. Jones let a can opener slip last week and cut herself in the pantry. Ben Mowery, Sam Sims, and Seth Corse giving excuses for not attending League meeting Sunday night. All were poor stuff but accepted provided it does not happen next time. Jim Hale has been "bumped" and that means losing a good sized family. By and large Emmitt Chiles was the handsomest man at the League meeting. Saw his brother next day and he is not in same class for looks. Mary Louise leaves Camp Allen Saturday after a most happy time but she will visit in Houston some time, more or less. Without her home loses its bright light.
"We love her laugh. We love her song. We love her the day long. Words do not spell by half The love we give our B. F. E." --Fragments from Hack.
Well, anyway, I guess Barbara Jane is taking her first railway ride and making a visit to Grandpaw and Grandmaw. Gee whiz, wish Nancy would start on a railroad ride. Mrs. Welsby shipping eggs. Hattie [Kundinger] selling yeast. Hugo gone a fishing. Mrs. Ackerman in the hospital. Mrs. Oscar Vernon Chapin visiting in Bay City. Cream station opens Tuesday. Good news for cow milkers. Carl Boeker rushing melons to Gulf. Sims and his merry crew cleaning up the sidewalks. Fine work. Guess he is getting ready for the "Good Willers" from Bay City. Hope they bring more than fifty-five. We have no use for such a small bunch. The Woman's Club needs the money so bring on your "Good Willers." Nothing nicer or more soothing to the eye than a pair of legs crossed and clad in shimmering silk. One time it required the wool of ten sheep to clothe a woman but nowadays it requires only one silk worm and he doesn't have to put in overtime. Mrs. Holsworth taking a morning ride. Collegeport boasts of a new mail carrier in the person of Milburn McNeil. I predict a great success for he has had considerable experience carrying females. The McNeil boys are two good hustlers, always ready to tackle a job. Cecil is on the way to be the engineer of the fast express and I can vision Milburn as postmaster general some of these days. Oscar Chapin was playing with Ora's favorite cat and it scratched him on the veranda. Have been reading Close-Ups, by Norma Talmadge. Very interesting. Carl Boeker with a load of watermelons that will average one hundred and twenty pounds, perhaps less, but they are big fellows. He has promised me a seed for next season's planting. Mrs. Allen making an extra trip on the Slopoke and taking cream back to Palacios. I saw her poking a "Sandy Ann" into her face. Ever eat one? Ask Carey Smith. E. L. Hall buying some of those one hundred and twenty pound Boeker melons. Someone will accuse me of lying about the weight but remember I said "perhaps less." Oscar Chapin back to shave mugs. Hope he stays for we need Oscar.
"We need his smile, All the while. He shave the mugs Of the town pugs. He takes in cream Measured by the ream." --Fragments from Hack.
Sunday is a very good day for fishing. For some reason I never could understand why fish bite more freely on that day. Possibly it's because humans bite the bait fed to them by the preacher. Very little difference baiting a hook for a man than for a fish for we're all fish in a way, if you know what I mean. Anyway give me a Sunday caught fish., broiled within the hour and let it be followed by a sweet old cob pipe filled with R. J. R. But to have complete joy it must have been bought three bales for two bits. Miss Merle Wainner is Ora's bodyguard for this week. Wonderful protection. Everybody but meme getting ready to go to Palacios. Mary Louise writes she will stay in Houston for ten days and visit some of her Camp Allen girl friends. She has been promoted to the position of fielder for the girls' baseball team. The land breeze is slight but it brings the breath of heated air to us and we long for the cool breezes from three thousand miles of sea. If God ever made a bigger damn fool than a hen with chickens I never met himitorher. Ask Betty Hart. By the way, Betty is pulling off a poultry and dairy exhibit the fifteenth and wants me to send her one of my Holstein cows and I have promised to do so. I am sending a pure bred, registered animal, which is as gentle as a girl with her first lover. This cow has never to date done one mean thing and O, boy! Such milk. She will be exhibited in one of the show windows and Betty will milk her three times each day. Don’t miss this. Farmers are queer boys. Just now they say that fat at 30 cents per pound is worth nothing. What else do they raise that brings thirty cents spot cash for every pound? It's easy money and they all know it.
"We figure ourselves The things we like, and then we build it up As chance will have it, on the rock or sand; For thought is tired of wandering o'er the world. And home bound Fancy runs her bark ashore." --Phillip Van Arteveide, Part I, Act I, Sc. 5, Sir H. Taylor.
Matagorda County Tribune, July 8, 1927
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Rev. H. Paul Janes asked to be released from services at First Church of Collegeport this week. Pending release from his work here, Mr. James has accepted the position of direction of the department of budget collection of the Board of Christian Education of the Presbyterian Church, U. S. A. Mr. Janes expressed regret at leaving Collegeport where he has spent three years as pastor of First Church of Collegeport, the oldest Community Church in Texas. “I am leaving for three reasons,” Mr. Janes said. “First the church is in the best of condition. The years of greatest struggle and past and with the certain development of the country here a new man would have a better opportunity to take hold of the work now. It would be unwise to change administration of a church in the middle of a rapid period of growth such as is soon to follow to Collegeport. “Second, it is impossible for me to do the graduate work in the university that is necessary, if I stay in the regular ministry, and remain at Collegeport through this period of growth. “Third, the position I am about to take up entails a great deal of publicity work to which I have given most of my training and in which I have had most experience. “The opportunities of the new position are great and the need urgent. Many ministers would be glad of the opportunity of serving in a community united in its religious work, hence it should not be difficult to secure a new pastor. “I want to express my deep gratitude to the people of Collegeport and to those at Citrus Grove, whom I will also ask to release me, for their staunch support of my work here and for their exceeding kindness and graciousness to us in the past three years.
Matagorda County Tribune, Friday, July 15,
1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
Of all my reading, historical romances are the most fascinating. I refer to such stories as The Conqueror, Blennerhasset, Josephine Empress of France. They are not dry bones of history, but have the breath of life breathed into them. They present living, pulsating, breathing life and they are written with such power of description, that one regrets when finis is reached.
One of the best ways to teach history, so that a child will remember, is to encourage the reading of historical romances. I have just finished reading The Refugees, by A. Conan Doyle. It is a tale of two continents in the time of King Louis of France and gives one a close-up view of court life in those times and a new idea of the life and character of the man who owned and ruled France for more than fifty years. He was a man of dual nature, a big-hearted, generous, selfish, rogue?. When he died he called his retainers to his side and said, "Gentlemen, I desire your pardon for the bad example I have set for you. I have greatly to thank you for the manner in which you have served me, as well as the attachment and fidelity which I have always experienced at your hands. I request from you the same zeal and fidelity for my grandson. Farewell, gentlemen, I feel that this parting has affected not only myself but you also. Forgive me! I trust that you will sometime think of me when I am gone."
It is a tale of the persecution of the Huguenots and their flight to distant lands. The scene changes from the brilliant court of Versailles to Canada and New York, come Indian fights, tortures, death, but love over all wins as it always does. It tells in a forcible manner what men will endure for the sake of religious belief. Good stuff for old and young. If one wishes to read of a country painted in words, with all of its glory, read The Country Beyond, by that wonderful writer, James Oliver Curwood. He is a master at description. Gobs of fighting, slathers of love, a dog with a soul worked in and with all refreshing, instructive, clean, wholesome. Much better than True Stories for the boy or girl. How I detest such vile stuff. Stuff that destroys the taste for reading and leads on to destruction. And yet men and women who should know better buy it, read it and take it home for young boys and girls.
"If there's a hold in a' your coats, I rede ye tent it; A chiels amang ye takin' notes, And, faith, he'll prent it." --Burns.
Oscar Chapin down from Markham getting ready to move back to God's town. Tommy Hicks selling cattle. He is also some bull catcher. Ought to be with Will Rogers. Some rain, what? About twenty inches, more or less, probably less, yet, much less but still some. Two farmers in same community shipping cream to same creamery in Galveston. One states he receives 33c per pound of fat f. o. b. Galveston, the other states he receives 33c per pound f. o. b. his station. Which one tells the truth? Look for answer on page 42. Margaret Holsworth returning from her Chicago school work for the summer vacation. Wonder if autos will operate today in the mud. Guess so for auto owners no longer know how to walk. Ask Seth Corse. E. L. Hall sporting a new straw dickey. Makes him look like a youth. Yes, autos operate in mud. Ora Chapin's guineas have guinead and she now has five, so carload shipments will soon begin. Does an oyster suffer? Read on. Read on. It is possible for a man to be educated but not cultured. Culture is the keen edge of the knife of life.
"Its proper power to hurt, each creature feels; Bulls aim their horns, and asses lift their heels." --Pope
Opening the cream station means quite a saving to local producers and I hope they give it generous patronage. Tommy Hicks selling 480 head of cattle at a good round price. Delivery this week. Mrs. Janes' auto refuses to auto. The Allens bringing fish, ice, bread, groceries to the besieged Collegeporters. Mary Louise elected "honor girl" at Camp Allen and now having a fine time in Houston. Although the summer White House is 32 miles from the roost of the reporters, news from the silent one seems to slip out. Dr. Frank Crane says, "Study to find out what the law of average is and follow the law." According to the bureau of agricultural economics, 36 of our leading cities took 500,152 cars of sixteen leading fruits and vegetables out of a production of 899,431 cars. Of this number New York took 125,253 cars while Chicago was second with 59,349 cars. Salt Lake was last on the list with 1250 cars. Dallas took 3004 cars while Fort Worth took 2224. Wonder what the final consumer paid and what the producer received. There certainly was a big spread as there always will be until some wise boy discovers a plan which will eliminate much handling and local hauling. The old lady said life was pretty hard and that she had only two teeth left, one in the upper jaw and one in the lower and then she smiled and said, "But thank God they meet." That's optimism. When George M. Bailey passed on, Texas lost a man with a soul filled with human kindness. There has been few like him and there will be a few in the future. I am glad I have had the pleasure and privilege of meeting him in his workshop and the opportunity to see him at his craftsman bench. I don't believe George Bailey ever willingly hurt a human being. His heart was too full of love. I met him in the days when R. M. Johnston, G. J. Palmer, A. E. Clarkson, Harry Warner, Judd Mortimer Lewis and the only George M. Bailey meant the Post. Then "Mefo" was struggling with the Chronicle. All splendid men, good newspaper fellows, approachable, ready for a visit, a talk or a story. Lord, give the balance longer life than was meted out to George Bailey. Then the Galveston News was considered the best NEWS paper in Texas. It had a large circulation and one reason was because S. M. Lesene who wrote human stories which he gathered in the field. When I think of Lesene I think of one of God's noblemen. Did a farmers' meeting congregate, there was found Lesene and he brought with him the News and he wrote in a human way and the News prospered and as it does not at this time. But S. M. Lesene answered the call just as did George Bailey and they are both turning in copy over there. George Bailey died too young. He should have been spared at least twenty years but like most other men in his profession he burned himself out, giving his energy, life and talents in generous measure until the fount dried up and then came the passing of the river and we know of him only in memory but 'tis a sweet memory. "Requiescat in pace."
Norma Talmage writing Close Ups discloses the fact that she weighs only 103 pounds and that she goes to the studio in her "nitie" because it saves so much dressing and undressing. Makes me think of a niece who after washing dishes hangs the dripping dish rag on a faucet and says, "Drip, darn you." Norma says her "tummie" is concave instead of convex. Always wondered why she had such a queer looking figure Give me nice, plump, round, convex tummies. I feel sorry for Norma. "The dog that dropped his bone to snap at its reflection in the water went dinnerless. So do we often lose the substance--the joy--of our work by longing for tasks we think better fitted to our capabilities." Jack Holsworth mailing packages. Dorothy Crane buying stamps. E. L. Hall getting his noon-day drink of home brew buttermilk. Keeps him young. Ora Chapin taking in cream. No breeze and another scorching day with temperature 'round 90. God save those who have 100 or more. Along with the first of this week's grist a slumgullion I wrote "But love over all wins as it always does." When I wrote those words I had not read The Mighty Atom by Marie Corelli or The Half Hearted by John Buchan. In neither does love win out. Both have horrible endings. The first is a protest against the modern thought that there is no God, Jesus was a myth, there is no life beyond; in fact, a protest against atheism and for that the lesson is good. Wish I had not read these books, but they both passed the censor and are in our library. Mrs. Emmitt Chiles with her family back from a visit at Lane City. Paul Janes and Emmitt Chiles taking a bunch of boys on a fishing trip down the bay. Someone caught 186 fish, mostly trout. There are many kinds of bootlegging. Booze, fish, craps, and using profane language is all bootlegging for all may be violations of the law.
Carl Boeker brought me another of those queer cucurbitaceous fruits. This one must have weighed 160 or 165 pounds with the rind, but perhaps less, considerable less for I only judged by the way that miserable wretch, who is my wife, lugged the fruit. He charged nothing for the fruit and only a nominal sum for trucking it in. The outside was a clear, cool green, shading to almost white on one side while the inside was a bright scarlet and it was exceedingly juicy and full of sweetness. A monstrous, strange fruit. Wonder why other fellows do not obtain a seed of this strange fruit and raise one or two of them. I shall have them next year for Carl promised to save a seed for me.
Light "Be not troubled about many things; Fear often hath no whit of substance in it, And lives but just minute. While from the very snow the wheat-blade springs; And light is like a flower That bursts in full leaf from the darkest hour; And He who made the night Made, too, the flowery sweetness of the light. Be it thy task through His good grace to win it." --Alice Cary.
Took this poem from LABOR. It has an appeal to me. I like it and hope others will. An advertisement in The Tribune under date of July 7, says, "We will be closed July 4th." Wonder what is the idea of advertising one year in advance. One of our citizens while harnessing a mule was kicked just south of the corn crib. Silvery tarpons, what's the matter of Nancy, she is a girl I fancy, and I wonder why she does not take a railroad ride and hasten to my side.
Sorry, but have to cut out questions this week. Too many answers, especially from Collegeport. Here are answers for last week's question: Almost 3000 miles of railway built; nine states took a census; 295 postoffices established; 371 discontinued; 43 had their names changed; 588 new railroad stations opened; 452 abandoned; and 129 new ones renamed. These are the thoughts that came to me when the "moo-moos" came up with their udders and teats caked with mud and their tails as heavy as a baseball bat. Yes, if he is a married oyster.
Matagorda County Tribune, July 15, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
When the local merchants no longer have R. J. R. in stock a town degenerates. It slips back. The joy of life is taken from the inhabitants. This is the situation in this burg today. A good story, an easy chair, a bright light, a clean cob pipe filled with R. J. R. and if there is anything on earth nearer heaven I know it not.
"And when the smoke ascends on high, Then thou behold'st the vanity Of worldly stuff Gone with a puff; Thus think, and smoke tobacco.
And seest the ashes cast away, Then to thyself thou mayest say, That to the dust Return thou must Thus think, and smoke tobacco." --Anonymous--Before 1689.
And Byron says:
"Sublime tobacco! which from east to west Cheers the tar's labor or the Turkman's rest Divine in hookahs, glorious in a pipe, When tipped with amber, mellow, rich and ripe; Like other charmers, wooing the caress More dazzling when daring in full dress; Yet thy true lovers more admire by far Thy naked beauties--Give me a cigar!"
Well, anyways, let Byron have a cigar but give me my old jimmy pipe packed full of R. J. R. Yesterday Tousie Head was married and now Uncle Judd has two daughters married and gained two sons. Eyes of Blue and Tousie Head. Watch the Post-Dispatch for some new poesy from the only Uncle Judd. Hattie Kundinger, Carrie Nelson and a merry crew of about twenty more damsels spent the night on the gulf beach. They went down on the Slopoke, one of the ships of the Allen line of ships. Ships? Aye! Aye! Sir! Why call them just boats when we all know they are noble ships. Carrick made it in '67. No, no, this does not mean John Carrick, but refers to the great golf player. Hope he does not discontinue his Tribune. Mrs. W. (name verboten) making a flower garden in front of her store. Auto full of newcomers looking the Van Ness place over. Pretty girl in the bunch and so I hope they rent it. Would enjoy having a pretty girl for a neighbor. Oscar Chapin making contract to operate school truck. One of our citizens climbed on the roof of his house the other day looking for a leak and fell, striking himself on the back porch. "The man who threatens the world is always ridiculous, for the world can easily go on without him, and in a short time will cease to miss him."--Dr. Johnson. The modern American flapper is a sure game sport. It makes no difference how skinny or unattractive her figure may be she grins and "bares" it. Wish rains would cease long enough so that Sam Sims could clean up the fig orchards. Saw a girl with skirt three inches above the knee and thought "what's the use of a skirt when a belt would conceal as much." Seth Corse is one of the mourners. Has only two pipes of R. J. R. left but as he is a good friend he offered to share with me. Paul Janes announces that he will leave these fields of work for other pastures. He is full of pep and ambition and Philadelphia will know he is town. Cream coming in to the local station in good quantities and that means more "Morning Glory" will be made. I bet my money that the Texas Creamery boys are congratulating each other. Having read several editorial comments on Henry Ford's apology to the Jews, I must confess that "Mefo" has them all skun. It is a little classic and even at that 'tis nothing for most everything he writes is in the same class. Henry Ford performed a brave deed. It required guts to make such an abject apology, to eat crow as he did, but the world holds him in higher estimate for it. It came just in time to sell thousands of the new model to Zion. When John Drew passed away the American stage lost its greatest actor. I have heard him many times and always went away charmed. No matter what the charge at the box office one received a generous value received. John Drew was a finished, polished gentleman, on or off the stage. 'Tis a pity he could not appear in a picture so that new generations might witness his portrayals. Miss Merle Wainner still protecting Ora Chapin. George Welsby shipping guineas. L. E. Liggett sending out some contemporaneous eggs. The Hesson Pige [Pipe?] Company offers one pound cherry honey for $4. At 25c an ounce I rather have R. J. R. for four dollars will buy forty-eight bales of that solace at three bales for two bits. Four dollar tobacco is not for plebians. Cherry honey listens good but R. J. R. smokes up mighty well even if one is obliged to buy it in Palacios. As I write these words my "BFE" is home for a long vacation.
"She is home with her eyes o' blue, In them I see the rainbow's hue, For thirty days I've missed her charm And thank God, he saved her from all harm." --Fragments from Hack.
Anyway, what is home without our girl, our wonderful daughter. Nada. God grant that she may grow into a sweet, wholesome woman, a capable wife, and mother.
Writing about ships, I recall that one day in San Francisco harbor, with my son I visited the ship Kenelworth, 146 days out from New York. She was a five-master and the cabin boy was showing us about when I turned to Tod and said, "Some boat, son," and the cabin boy saluted and said, "Beg pardon, sir, but the boats are in the davits. This is a ship." The true university of these days is in a collection of books.--Carlyle. "Instead of making a fool of a man, a woman furnishes the opportunity--and lets him do the rest." Robert Murry trucking cream. Seems like olden times when Thomas McC. Clark used to send our 12 to 15 cans each week. Oh, yes, there is money in butterfat at 30c. Remember 30c is 30c. If you wish something luscious put your face in one of those cucurbitaceous fruits raised by Carl Boeker and called "Darby-Kelly." Darby-Kelley? You said it. He brought in a new load Thursday, just because Mary Louise was coming home and left four at our house. I was glad to pay him for hauling them in. Each one weighed, well that miserable wretch who is my wife weighs 107 pounds and as she carried one of these fruits they just balanced. I advise the other local growers to make reservation for a seed. Nothing like 'em in these parts. Jack Holsworth riding a prancing steed. Looks like a Major General. The army was a great thing for our fellows. Monkey Chiles is some cowboy with his horse hair riata. Hattie [Kundinger] selling "BM" tabs. Hugo putting in new fish poles. Cap Allen of the Allen fleet of ships bringing in a load of groceries for the hungry Collegeports. Contemporaneous eggs bringing 24 1-5 cents per dozen. Not baker's dozen, just ordinary dozen. Glad they get the fifth cent. John Heisey cutting grass. Hope he mows the town streets. Women going to Frank King's for the monthly meeting of the Woman's Club. There is always room at the top; the elevator doesn't run that high. Emmitt Chiles breaking the speed law with his truck. Mrs. Boeker from Illinois visiting her son Carl and eating that monstrous strange fruit. Mrs. Homer Goff back from a trip to the land of the Illini. Pictures of Barbara Jane with her grandsire and granddam. All three look pleased with each other. Miss Barbara weighs twelve pounds and can say, "ello." Bright kiddo. No wonder for her mother said "ohello" when she weighed but six pounds. Friday I went to Bay City to be present at the "big day" put on by Doctor Harkey and Betty Hart. The Doc had his hands full trying to keep everyone in line and steer the program so there would be no slip. First time I have seen the good Doc in action for some time and I admired his patience:
"Patience, my lord! why, 'tis the soul of peace; Of all the virtues 'tis nearest kin to heaven; It makes men look like gods. The best of men That e'er wore earth about him was a sufferer, A soft, meek, patient, humble, tranquil spirit, The first true gentleman that ever breathed." --The Honest Whore, Part I, Act I, Sc. XII.--T. Dekker.
Once more I gazed on the beauty portion of Doc's establishment but he has moved her over to his side of the place and it is no longer possible to listen to Doc's chatter and keep one's gaze on the N. E. corner. Wonder why Doctor is so squincey, selfish, so unwilling to share the good things of the Chamber of Commerce. Anyway, I do not blame him. The salary he receives is nothing compared with perquisites. The short course so far as I could observe was a success. Seldom does a community have the privilege to listen to such an array of talent as Doctor Harkey assembled. Everyone was an ace in his line. Too bad the local merchants were not present. They came out to the luncheon but their faces were absent when the talks and discussions began. They like to feed their bellies but care naught for the mental stuff. This county should have at least three short courses each year. Sorry I could not stay all the day but cows must be milked so "I et and run." Well, well and three more wells. Mr. Tom McNeil getting tired of doing the express messenger work all by himself has procured an assistant. The new man arrived Friday, the 15th, and weighed in just eleven and one-half pounds. At present he is handling dairy products only but it will not be long before he will take hold of those contemporaneous eggs. Have not seen him yet but think he must look like Cecil. Who was the third man to make a non-stop flight across the Atlantic. It was Lindbergh. Alcock and Brown were the first two. Such is fame, renown, glory, reputation, celebrity, honor."
"And if his name be George, I'll call him Peter; For new made honor doth forget men's names." --Shakespeare.
Matagorda County Tribune, July 22, 1927
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“Now the serpent was more subtle than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree in the garden.” This is the first record we have of snakes and that this reptile was common in biblical times is evidenced by the fact that in nineteen different passages it is referred to. The snake has always been held in abomination by man. Most snakes crawl on the belly but some walk erect on two feet and of the two varieties these are the most despicable for they seek to destroy character of others and destroy confidence in still others. Often they will make statements calculated to destroy the peace and contentment of an entire community. These are commonly called “knockers” but ‘tis an ill term for it does not in the least describe the vileness of their attempts.
“Then, at last and only
couplet fraught Emmitt Chiles taking his family and a friend to the medicine show at Palacios. Hope they bought medicine that would cure all ills. Mrs. Crane operating the cream station. From what I know about her, believe she has a good stock of sticktoitness. Homer Goff circulating a referendum to support the action of county commissioners selection of an engineer. I know nothing about the squabble and most of the local signers knew no more. Some political snake is no doubt at work. We all have confidence in the County Court and in the State Highway Commission. Why not let them settle the matter. As far as I am concerned, would prefer Gustafson, for he is a good engineer and well known in the county. Being in profound ignorance of the affair I refused to sign until I obtain light. Anyway we want that nine-foot sidewalk and want it “muy pronto.” According to the Post-Dispatch, during the encampment at Palacios, automobiles will run out in every direction each day for the purpose of bringing in women and girls as dancing partners for the soldiers. Wonder how many fathers and mother will allow their daughters to take to trip for such a purpose. As far as we are concerned, no auto need stop at Homecroft for such an object. Mr. Stafford of Springfield, Ill., is here making a survey of the local situation for the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company. Some say he will move three thousand people in, some say only thirty, but even if he induces three to move here we will hold special prayer services asking God to shower blessings on his head. So far, he has concluded that we will have rich soil, unexcelled climate, generous supplies of the purest of artesian water, good fishing, hunting, bathing but like hell, we need people. Let us turn in and aid him. No place for human snakes just now. John B. Heisey the champion cow milker. The Mayo family moving into the Chapin house. Mrs. Crane operating the cream station with increased receipts. Hope she sticks for we need the station, and the Texas Creamery needs the Collegeport product so that they may make the highest quality of Morning Glory butter. The burg full of auto salesmen taking orders for the new Ford. One of my admirers from West Texas sent me a beautiful calendar call “Puffs From an Old Pipe.” Guess she has read about R. J. R. Hope some one who reads these thoughts will send me three bales of R. J. R. and a nice little pooch. Here is one of the wise sayings, “half of one per cent beverages are about as filling and satisfying as the middle of a doughnut.
“A sorry tale was told to
me
And yet I doubt if all the
jails Pilday says: “There are some who bear a grudge to those who do them good.” Such is the work of the snake which walks on two legs. We have a few in this burg, in this county, in the state and nation. They attack any person from our president down to the humblest person. ‘Tis bad enough when they hurl their vile stuff at an individual but it is much worse when the attack is directed at an entire community. Some of the readers of this column will wonder why this spasm of snakes. The reason is that some member of the Ophidia family takes time to write people who propose to move to Collegeport, warning them that it is an undesirable place for living. At least one person has heeded the warning and decided that this is not the place where folks can live in peace in comfort. “For himself does a man work evil in working evil for another.” Jack Holsworth sporting around in a new auto. It’s not a “coop” but one of these new “cabarets.” Always with a bunch of girls hanging around, he will now be obliged to employ a bodyguard to keep them away. Wednesday about twenty-five victims waited two hours for Commodore Harkey and Captain Walker and their merry crew of agricultural pirates. Guess they thought the sea was too heavy and so they missed the pleasure of making the victims walk the plank. Our people are interested in the bean and cabbage deal but they all want to get in early for “tempus fugits.” Fair and clear down in these parts. Sam Sims busy as the proverbial one-armed paper hanger suffering from the itch. Just spraying the fig trees and the trees look up and smile at the green bath, toss their leaves to the breeze, put on new wood and set figs. Looks as though after all there will be a fair but late crop. If Doctor Van Wormer could find a couple more Sam Sims, things would hum down here. Only a few like him. If one wishes to read a romantic tale, peruse “The Battle of the Corn Borer,” By Forrest Crissey, in Saturday Evening Post, July 16, and the editorials are well worth while. Carl L. Mitchell says, “There are some people who need no friends. The cemeteries are full of them.” Our local fishermen seem to be out of luck or rather out of fish for the pescados refuse to bite.
“His angle-rod made of a
sturdy oak, No sixty-inch trout this week and no twenty-seven pound croakers either. The League met with Frank King Thursday night. Good attendance, much interest and one new member. Mrs. King as usual served dainty refreshments. Always sure of a good time at the Kings. Ruth Mowery is a dainty little lady. Roberta Liggett still another. According to a report recently issued by the U. S. department of agriculture, if 500 pounds of cotton is produced on an acre the cost per pound is 9c, three hundred pounds 12c, one hundred pounds 25c, and sixty pounds 47c. The average cost of producing a bushel of wheat is $1.12, a bushel of corn 70c, and of oats 53c.
“One by one in the
light-house A ship? Yes, a ship for we have no boats on Matagorda Bay. This one was the Clara M and was not from the celebrated Allen fleet of ships. It was manned by Commodores Hall and Brazil and a merry crew of pirates bound for Pass Cavallo and the fishes waiting there. A bottle of rum on a dead man’s chest and plenty of grub for all the rest. Good way to spend Sunday way out on the clean, cool, waters of the gulf, where God is present and man is infinitesimal. Hope I get a fish sixty inches long. The local burghers giving a farewell reception to Paul Janes. Seth Corse collecting box rents. Ora and Oscar [Chapin] expected tonight for they can not keep away from the “Town of Opportunity.” O, yes, she’ll come back with him a trailing along behind. John (full name verboten) while harnessing a horse last week was kicked just south of the corn crib.
“Complaining oft gives
respite to our grief; “It is common to distinguish men by the names of animals which they are supposed to resemble. Thus a hero is frequently termed a lion, and a statesman a fox; an extortioner gains the appellation of vulture, and a fop the title of monkey. There is also among the various anomalies of character, which a survey of the world exhibits, a species of beings in human form, which may be properly marked out as the screech-owls of mankind.” Thus saith Dr. Samuel Johnson and I might add that at times man takes the form of a snake for as Francis Bacon writes “suspicions among thoughts are like bats among birds, they ever fly by twilight; certainly they are to be repressed, or at least well guarded; for they cloud the mind, they lose friends and they check business, whereby business can not go on currently and constantly; they dispose kings to tyranny, husbands to jealousy, wise men to irresolution and melancholy.” As for Collegeport, now is the time for all good men to defend the place in which we live. Our business is to mix with, to absorb and to influence others and this means growth. Thus endeth “Thoughts About Snakes.”
Matagorda County Tribune,
Friday, August 5, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
Emmitt Chiles put on quite an imposing parade when his rice harvesting outfit left town. Ten red wagons, each with a black boy in charge, harvesters, threshers, tractors. "The easiest way to get back on your feet is to get rid of your car." Ask Seth Corse. Jack Holsworth with a couple of dancing partners going to Palacios. Hattie Kundinger entertaining Arthur Matthes at lunch. The Paul Janes family left Monday morning for the new station, Philadelphia. Hope Queen Marie forgets her idea of entertaining a nunnery.
New family in town named Ash from Springfield. Hope Mrs. Ash likes the people and the location for we need folks like hell. Guess they intend to stay for they have rented a box at the P. O. I will be glad when the soldiers camp is over. It may be a great commercial asset for Palacios but I doubt about its being a moral asset. Already some of the girls are bragging that they will pick out a soldier boy. Wonder why the strong odor of sulfur between Homecroft and the bay, especially noticeable when there is a southwest wind. Can it be that under the flats bordering Pilkington Slough there is another big bed of sulfer? Worth investigating. Have made quite a reputation as a plumber the past week. Not plumber's wages, however. Ora and Oscar [Chapin] down for Sunday. Ora drives a Ford touring while Oscar has a sport model runabout. Well named for it just about runs about. Ten thousand acres of rice for next year listens good. Means more people and we have everything but people. When Commodore Hall returned from that fishing excursion he brought me 67 inches of trout. Some trout but then he always lands big ones.
Collegeport, too, is progressing as witness the new gas tank being
installed by Hugo Kundinger. Hugo will now enjoy free gas. Of course, he
will tip Arthur Matthes from time to time. Carl Boeker has not been
around with more of that cucurbitaceous fruit for some time. Maybe it is
past the season and perhaps it's because he is saving the balance for
seed. Who knows? The Liggetts and Holsworths going to Houston to attend
the wedding of Howard Morris whom all the old timers will remember.
Pasture getting a bit short so hope we have a shower or two. It will not
be long before Thomas McNeil Jr. weighs 50 pound for he is a lusty young
man. E. L. Hall getting his daily drink of butter milk. Keeps him young.
A letter from my only son. On his way to Havana. Our good friend, Noah
Webster, defines, choose as: "to make choice of; to select; to take by
way of preference from two or more objects offered; to elect; to choose
the least of two evils." Maybe Calvin Coolidge is wiser than we all
think. He at least has allowed a loop through which he may yet be the
next president.
The "Bug" who writes "gulf" stuff for The Trib starts a definition like this: "man is a creature who will spot a shapely ankle three blocks away." Wonder why allow eyes to linger on ankles these days when one can easily see more wonderful sights higher up. Albert Dorris, one time Collegeport school boy, visiting his friends and taking luncheon with The Homecrofters. Albert is a credit to the county and one of these days ever inhabitant will be glad to know Albert Dorris.
"God's angels drop the grains of gold. Our duties, 'midst life's shining sands. --Anon.
Matagorda County Tribune, August 12, 1927
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The regular monthly meeting of the Collegeport Woman's Club was held at the home of Mrs. Crane Thursday afternoon, August 12, with Mrs. Harry Austin Clapp in charge of the program. The usual business was transacted which included the resignation of Mrs. Oscar Vernon Chapin as secretary and the selection of Mrs. S. B. Sims to fill the vacancy. The special feature of the program was a paper on hymns prepared by Mrs. E. C. Van Ness who used to reside here. Mrs. Van Ness is now organist for the Central Christian Church, San Antonio, and secretary of the San Antonio Chapter of the Guild of American Organists. (The paper Mrs. Van Ness read for the program is included in the original article.)
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
"What though no friends in sable weeds appear, Grieve for an hour, perhaps, then mourn a year, And bear about the mockery of woe To midnight dances and the public show!" --Pope.
Last Friday when the S. P. train pulled into Palacios it unloaded, so the tale goes, sixty-five "dee-gees." Their arrival caused much excitement among young and old and it is related that every superannuated old boy in the town was present to rubber and feast his eyes on the display of loveliness. Some belonged to the order of "bx" but some were fresh as daisies and evidently had not been on the road many moons. These gals were brought in for the purpose of entertaining the soldiers during the encampment at what is called "the tent city" located on Oliver's Point across the bay from Palacios and about two miles south of Collegeport. The old boys stood around trying to renew their youth and absorb inspiration and all joined in singing that famous old hymn, "Backward, Turn Backward, O Time, in Thy Flight--Make Me a Boy Again Just for Tonight." Well, anyway, this burg is not puffed up much because the "tent city" is located on its shores. We much rather it be across the bay where "The City by the Sea" sits. Mrs. Emmitt Chiles and family accompanied by Mary Louise spending a week at Lane City. Oscar Chapin down to cut the hair and whiskers of the town burghers. Wonder what became of Ora. Anybody know? The Christian Endeavor Society endeavored to hold its usual service Sunday night but with poor success. Some of the members were playing ball while some were visiting the army camp, some fishing. Rev. J. Marshall Janes conducted services Sunday and report says he bore down pretty hard on the smoking habit. I don't like the idea of a preacher knocking R. J. R. for that is what the knowing ones smoke. If he would only urge Ben Mowery to sell three bales for two-bits I would join in the chorus. Several wondering what has become of [the] Beacon. Better ask Paul Janes. He knows and Seth Corse does not.
Will Rogers says, "A poor family is one which owns but one automobile" comes another who says, "The poor we have with us always and aren't their flivvers a nuisance." That puts me in the pauper class. If you find a small black spider in your house it may be "latrodectus mactains," a death dealing insect. More than a dozen persons on the Pacific Coast have died from its bite this summer. Get rid of it.
Dancing girls at Pleasure Point (nee Oliver's Point). Mrs. Crane testing cream. Some patrons kicking at test. Autos sputtering. Five cent pooch with a five dollar collar. Girl with fine skin ruined by use of paint. Spindling legs. Outrageous looking bobbed hair. Why will they try to improve on nature? Little short man smoking crooked pipe, the pipe gurgling joyously. Palacios fire siren screeching. Wonder who's afire. Tall man wearing a helmet. Carl Boeker waiting patiently for the Beacon. Tom NcNeil trying to lead a cow. John Heisey with his comfortable and safe surrey. Boys filling gas tanks at dad's expense. Verner Bowers dancing in white. Pastures dry, cows also. Oscar taking cotton classing lessons. Airplane wrecked but pilot all right. George Welsby putting up hay (?). Dorothy Crane receiving oil news. Cap Allen bringing ice in his ship Slopoke. New engineer on Portsmouth limited. Fish not biting except for Cal. Robert Murry erstwhile cowman, now milker. Tom and Barbara Hale living in Bay City. A small reddish snake running through the grass. Girl trying to read the message of a writing spider. Woman's Club meeting with Mrs. Crane. One, two, three, four airplanes droning overhead. Sport at his evening rations. The moon a ball of silver hanging in the eastern sky. Mrs. Welsby selling eggs. Mrs. Carrick and Mrs. Crane sitting on stools and drinking koke. Hattie [Kundinger] selling yeast. The "two carloads" of men seeking land developed into two auto loads. We all wish "two car" loads of homeseekers had arrived. Friday we will hear seventeen guns fired in honor of Governor Moody, commander in chief. Wonder how many know about salutes? The national salute consists of 48 guns, one for each state and is fired no July 4th. The salute for the president is 21 guns. Why did this nation adopt a salute of 21 guns for the presidential salute? No one really knows but several reasons are given: One is that 21 guns were fired to notify England that the colonies had reached the age of majority; another is that the numerals comprising 1776 when added together 1-7-7-6 equal 21; another reason is that for many years 21 guns had been used as the salute to kings, emperors and other potentates. Anyway Friday, the 12th, Dan will receive a governor's salute of 17 guns. He deserves it. To celebrate the operating of the new gas pump, Hugo has consented to make a special price of twenty cents in five gallon lots. O, before I forget "dee-gees" is only another name for dancing girls. I know that some of the readers will appreciate this explanation. Seth Corse wants to visit Pleasure Point. This proves the old saw that "a man is only as old as he feels." As an old friend, I would enjoy seeing Seth waltzing around and around. The soldier boys are having plenty of amusement on land and sea. When Coolidge said, "I do not choose" cotton slumped five dollars but recovered and went five better when the crop reporting board reported an estimated crop of 13,492,000 bales. Indicated yield per acre 156.8 pounds. This is one reason why the growing of cotton is not profitable. Too small production, too large an overhead. Wonder if Doctor Harkey has forgotten that he owes a visit to the Collegeport truck growers. The girls who roll their hose give plenty of sox appeal. The beans brought to me by the Roth boys certainly were fine fruit. Did not realize that such beans could be produced. Thank you, and bring another mess some other day. Carlyle says, "Clever men are good but they are not the best," and Phaedrus says, "Whoever has even once become notorious by base fraud, even if he speaks the truth, gains no belief." Two skinny, slinky young things teetering on peg heels at least four inches high drifted into a local cold drink place the other night and pivoting on stools absorbed kokes. Wonder if they came from Pleasure Point. If they did, God help the pleasure seekers. Did I say Pleasure Point? Pardon for it is now once more Oliver's Point. A. K. Eaton, territorial supervisor for the Morning Glory Creameries, here for the purpose of installing Mrs. Crane in the new cream station and urging farmers to bring in that selected Collegeport cream without which the highest grade of Morning Glory can not be made. I am not much impressed with the modern dance. To me it looks like a destroyer of morals. No girl can go through the peculiar, "hootchy-kootchy" motion some of them indulge in, and keep the bloom of innocency. The music, just a blare and blast of harsh screaming instruments has no appeal to me but it may excite passion and emotion in those who dance to it. I would go miles to hear once more a dance band of string instruments and listen to the low musical growl of the bass viol that always present, never intruding, marked the time perfectly.
Give me the warmest red and green, A cornet and a tambourine, To paint my jubilee! For when pale flutes and oboes play, To sadness I become a prey. Give me the violets and the May, But no gray skies for me."
Dancing for the love of dancing is a graceful and healthful amusement but some of the dancing I saw the other night was disgusting, distasteful, repugnant, abhorrent, nauseating. Pleasure Point is once more just plain Oliver's Point, the place where Burton D. Hurd once planned to start a large duck ranch. The "dee-gees" shipped back to Houston and all is quiet once more on the shores of Matagorda Bay. Thus endeth the second lesson "N'est-ce-pas." The soldiers camp is well worth looking over and is a credit to the army. To me it seems a pity to spend so many thousands of dollars just for a two weeks of play. Those who visit Palacios at night seem to care little for the various games of chance, the rodeo, the vaudvil, but how they do fall for the hamburger, soda pop and the dance at the pavilion. Wonder why some fellow does not put in the "hotdog?" It is a delectable fruit, with a daintiness and delicacy that pleases king or pheasant [peasant]. I craved to absorb a few and hunted high and low but was forced to satisfy my craving with hamburgers.
Found "Pearl" for sale but 'twas an imitation of an imitation and my thoughts wandered back to the time when one could bury one's face in a foaming mug of genuine at five cents per schooner. Those were happy days, Bill. In all this gloom there is one bright spot--Ben Mowery is now smoking R. J. R. Seth Corse is with me in hoping that Ben will sell three bales for two-bits. Rev. M. A. Travis, organizer of the First Church in this place, is here for about two weeks. Sleeps in the "manse" and bums his eats from a very willing people for all are glad to have him back. Sam Susie Hoffman at Palacios but she has taken on a liability and goes under name of Susie Dawson. Just the same bright, attractive girl as of yore only she has grown into a very handsome young woman. Always did like Susie but now I--well I dare not go farther for that miserable wretch who is my wife will read this. The girl who can wipe the dust off her shoes, on the stockings, in a place where it will not show is some acrobat. Some of 'em can do it.
Matagorda County Tribune, August 19, 1927
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Mr. Homer Goff has been cutting rice this week. Mr. John Carrick has just finished harvesting 16 acres of Hegars. Mr. S. W. Corse, postmaster at Collegeport, was a business visitor in Bay City Saturday. Mr. and Mrs. Tom Hale, former Supt. of Schools here, are the proud parents of an eight pound boy. Mrs. Carl Boeker and son, Kent, left last week for a visit in Illinois and will be accompanied home by her son, and daughter. Mr. James Hale and family, former engineer out of Collegeport on the Missouri Pacific Line moved to Mission Tuesday. Mr. H. C. Houston, formerly of Edinburg, has taken Mr. Hale’s place and expects to move his family here soon. The Kings Daughters were entertained last Thursday by Mrs. C. E. Duller of Blessing, about 15 ladies were present and a great time enjoyed by all. Mr. C. G. Eisel and wife of New Orleans, La., and Miss Kate Dwyer, of Marshall, Texas, who have been visiting their brother, H. L. Eisel of Collegeport, have returned home. The Collegeport Fig Orchards Co. has recently installed a 40 barrel oil tank as they are converting their engine into an oil burner, preparatory to opening the Cannery for preserving figs. The Cannery will open around the 1st of September. Mr. and Mrs. Clifford Ash and Mr. Adna E. Phelps, formerly of Springfield, Illinois, are new residents of Collegeport. Mr. Phelps and Mr. Ash are employed by the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company. This piece of poetry was written by Adna E. Phelps, who came to Collegeport three weeks ago from Springfield, Illinois. Mr. Phelps is a graduate of the American School of Landscape Architecture and Gardening of New York, New York, and is now employed by the Collegeport Fig Orchards Co. Mr. Phelps state that he is very well pleased with Collegeport and is going to stay and watch it grow.
Palacios Beacon, August 25, 1927 |
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The Bayview School will open September 4th. Mrs. A. G. Hunt left on a business trip and visit to Mt. Belvieu, Texas. Mr. Pat Richman has just finished threshing this year’s crop of rice which amounted to some 6000 sacks. Verner Bowers will resume his duties with the Collegeport Rice and Irrigation Company Store after a two weeks vacation. L. E. Liggett and family have returned from several weeks visit by auto to Dallas, Texas, Wichita, Kans., and other points north. Miss Myrtle Fulcher is expected home this week after an extended visit to Garwood, Mt. Belvieu, Ganado and other points in north Texas. Mr. Emmitt Chiles has returned to Collegeport on a short visit from El Maton, where he has been busy with his rice threshing outfit in that vicinity. The Collegeport Industrial League met at the home of Mr. Ben Mowery in their regular monthly session. Many items of importance were handled, three new members were taken in and delicious refreshments were served. The Collegeport Fig Orchards Co. townsite orchards and are getting ready for the fall crop of figs which will open soon. They estimated a good crop for the two year old trees. The farmers and truck growers are interested in the co-operative movement with the Bay City Chamber of Commerce whereby shipments of Giant stringless green beans and Copenhagen cabbage can be shipped in car load lots from this vicinity.
Palacios Beacon, September 1, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp
Collegeport, Aug. 30.--M. A. Travis visiting The Homecrofters. Girl with peg heel shoes teetering along. Makes one think of Chinese women with bound feet. Engineer Huston mailing letters. Salright for Seth [Corse] needs the money. Bunch of girls fishing for crabs with poor luck. Bud Conover sparking. Some one stealing chickens. Wonder if he realizes it is now a criminal offense. Wonder if twelve soldier boys did die from drinking wood alcohol colored with iodine. Children getting ready for school. Robert Murry turned detective. Figs putting on fruit. Truck men buying seed for fall crop. New shade of hose so near like "au natural" that hose seems unnecessary. League holding regular meeting at Ben Mowery's. Several real estate deals pending. Looks like good time for Burton Hurd to return. R. J. R. still ten cents per bale a local store. Our prayer still unanswered. Business picking up at the P. O. Train four hours late. Couple of birthdays this week. John Heisey laying water pipe. Beacon on time this week. Wonder where Ora [Chapin] is? My miserable wretch don't look to be--dare not give figures. Why will bowlegged gals wear short skirts? Gambling games, rodeos, vaudeville, hamburger stands at Palacios fading away until next year. Lots of whistling, bell ringing, puffing as trains move 6500 soldiers homeward. Palacios fire siren blowing the time and we know it is noon. Man buying can of malt for bread making. Tom Hale Jr. has arrived. Bet Barbara is a sweet mother. Folks waiting for evening mail. Some for the evening male. Barbara Jane and Tommie have returned to their home in Dallas. Nancy in New York. Wonder when Doc Harkey will bring his bunch of "good willers" to Collegeport. Can't keep those good eats forever. Jack Holsworth selling insurance. Pastures drying fast. Rangers searching a Negro's house. Found nothing. Should have known this is a virtuous burg. Reading the Post-Dispatch I learn that Gustafson has landed the county engineer job and I am glad that he has done so. Hope he gets busy on that nine-foot sidewalk. The Slopoke of the Allen Line brought a heavy cargo of ice and provisions this day. All I know about the Chaplin tragedy is what I read in the Houston papers and I read that the woman who was his wife receives close to a million dollars as a subsidy. I would enjoying seeing the miserable wretch who is my wife extract a similar sum from me. If she could do so would be willing to split fifty-fifty with her. Now what's the use of our commissioners' court dallying any more. They have Gustafson as engineer and why not turn the lateral roads over to him also. What's the use of using two engineers? We all know Gus and we know he is a good engineer and a good fellow. Let's get busy for we want those nine-foot sidewalks. Little girl weighing about 90 pounds carrying about 20 pounds of paint on her face. A good washing with an antiseptic soap might clean her up and reveal a sweet mug. Some paper says that women will wear more clothes. About time. Doc Harkey and Walker were here Tuesday and held an enormous meeting consisting of five folks. They gave their bean and cabbage talk and we were glad to see them but sorry they made the trip. Takes more than such a turn-out to discourage the good Doc and his crew. Lost my girl in the fracas for Doc carried her away for a day or three. The little fat man with the crooked stem pipe has reformed and now smokes one with straight stem and it also gurgles joyously. Lots of fine Collegeport staple going out. About 250 acres planted here and from what is said twice that will be planted next year. Need a gin--not Old Tom--but one that will separate seed from lint. Cream patrons kicking about tests. This is the usual thing among producers. Keeps their minds off other things--bond issue--county court--school--Church. Days getting shorter.
"I knew a very wise man that believed that if a man were permitted to make all the ballads, he need not care who should make the laws of the nation."--Andrew Fletcher of Sattoun.
Swift told a truth when he said, "The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet and Doctor Merryman." What a change there would be in this world if each of us would employ these doctors. It is not each to choose but of the three I suggest we here in Collegeport try a prescription from Doctor Merryman. If it worked there would not be so many long faces. An American tourist asked if the Pantheon wasn't the place where they kept the panthers that ate the people in the Coliseum. Well, anyway, whether they did or did not, the main thing for us in this county is that Doctor Harkey puts across his plan for a sweet cream station. His success in this plan means many an added dollar to those who are milking cows. It means about 33 1-3 per cent more money than producers are receiving at present.
"No sooner is a temple built to God but the devil builds a chapel near by."--George Herbert.
The sun rose Tuesday morning just as it did the day before and it found Justice still standing holding the scales by which she judges men. Milburn McNeil going to Bay City High School. Mrs. Welsby selling some of those contemporaneous eggs. Hattie Kundinger developing into a Sherlock Holmes. Hope she finds the chickens. The Liggett family returning home. Robert Murry riding a prancing horse. The Country Gentleman for August begins a story entitled The Silver Fleece which is a cotton story, and judging from the first installment it provides some real thinking stuff for every grower of cotton. It rips the romantic robes of royalty from King Cotton and lays bare the real truth. Business, love, hate, mixed with good doses and from a reading of the first installment I anticipate several interesting reading moments. Hugo [Kundinger] dishing out that "Sodelicious Ice Cream" to be had only at the store of Hugo. Did I say Hugo? Pardon, I mean Hattie's store. Mrs. Welsby feeding the faces of hungry fellows. Mrs. Mowery has made a reputation as a maker of ice cream. It was mostly nuts and fruits incased in frozen 40 per cent cream and was "Extrasodelicious." The good Gulf people digging up the gas tank at Chapin's. Anyway, we don't need it now for Arthur Matthes has twenty or thirty, perhaps less, gas pumps in this burg. The wife of the mayor of Portsmouth making a visit to Collegeport. There is no better place to spend a week-end. Jim O'Neal guarantees peace, rest, security, good food, a generous bed, free baths, a romp on the beach with petting allowed provided she will stand for it. A. E. Phelps has arrived from Illinois and so the burg grows but we still, like hell, need more people. The ruins of the old bank building still pointing accusing fingers to the sky. The past week I read two books, both of which I recommend to young and old, Order No. 11, by Caroline Abbot Stanley, is a gripping tale of the Civil War, depicting the trials and troubles of a high class Southern family caught between the armies of the South and North. The Leopard's Spots, by that interesting writer, Thomas Dixon Jr., tells of the reconstruction period and its scene is laid in North Carolina. It is difficult to believe that men could do the terrible things described in this book, but knowing Dixon as I do I must accept the story as a true account of conditions during that period. Both books present an appeal to the lover of lovers for a beautiful love tale is woven in them. Doctor Luke of the Labrador is another clean tale describing the land of Labrador. Its people and, written in their quaint language, is a bit difficult to understand, but it's good, and clean and wholesome. All three are most fascinating, engrossing and picturesque, depicting strong characters. They are the kind you can't drop 'til you have turned the last page and then you are tempted to glance through them again. Girl sitting in an auto, her jaws active on a "cud" of chicle, her face looking like a blank wall but with less intelligence. I know of no one who secures more ease and comfort from an auto than Jack Holsworth. Fine figure, handsome face and has all the appearance of a millionaire. No wonder the girls fall hard. The present manner of feminine dress makes only one eye necessary, so why keep up two eyes? I advise my men readers to read a good cook book. You will find many stirring passages. The mortality of Collegeport is very low. For years it has only averaged one for each person.
Matagorda County Tribune, September 2, 1927
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Mrs. Jessie B. Richter left for Marshall, where she will spend the winter with her sister, Mrs. N. T. Womack. Miss Francis Eisel left this week for Marshall, where she will attend the winter term at Marshall High School. Miss Margaret Holsworth left Saturday, Sept. 3rd, for Chicago, where she will resume her regular duties in the schools of that city. Mrs. C. L. Boeker and children returned home Sunday Sept. 4th, after an extended visit with friends in Illinois. Mr. Bob Thompson has returned to Collegeport and resumes his job driving the school truck. Dr. W. W. Van Wormer, president of the Collegeport Fig Orchards Co., of Springfield, Illinois, is visiting here this week and looking over his interests here and at Palacios. The Collegeport Fig Orchards Company has mowed the grass and weeds along the main thoroughfares this week, also have tested out their new oil burner and cannery equipment, preparatory for canning the fall crop of figs. The Bay View School opened this week with an attendance of about 40 pupils. The teachers are: Miss Crystal Thompson, of Tom Bean, Texas; Miss Louise Walters, Collegeport; and Miss Willard Baird, Principal, of Weimar, Texas. Miss Elizabeth Hill, who has been visiting her sister, Mrs. Harry L. Eisel, here at Collegeport, has returned to her home at Marshall, Texas.
“Friendship alone all ties does bind the heart, The County Federation of Woman’s Clubs met at Gulf, Saturday, Sept. 3, and those attending from Collegeport were, Mrs. Frank King, Mrs. S. W. Corse, Mrs. Roy Nelson, Mrs. S. B. Sims, Mrs. Crane and daughter, Dorothy,. Mrs. Sims was the official delegate from Collegeport.
The citizen of Collegeport and Palacios who dies not mingle with the crowds that congregate at various places, especially in street corners, drug stores and various places, on Saturday nights, misses the best part of his life. There, are gathered are leaders of our communities, people who are in the forefront of progress, some are business men, some are rice and cotton farmers and many are stock raisers. But whatever their vocation, they are people whom it is pleasant to know. There should be a more marked disposition among these people to be more profuse in praise for their twin cities. Whatever you do and wherever you go, you should talk for the improvement and growth of these two cities. Folks, we no longer want to be called a village, we want to outgrow that, make these two cities by the sea take on a Metropolitan appearance. Now, with our praise, work and almighty help we can make the twin cities, two of the best looking cities of their size in the south. Do you know that the friendliness, hospitality and the attitude in general of Palacios and Collegeport toward strangers is commented on frequently. I am sure if the people in these two communities will work together, that in several years to come they will simply be repaid for the time and money and they are investing for the development of modern ideal cities by the sea. --By Adna E. Phelps.
Palacios Beacon, September 8, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
A meadow lark sitting on a fence post, his yellow vest gleaming in the sun, like old gold. An armadillo lumbering along. His efforts to escape are amusing as I attempt to catch him. I let him go his way for I have no desire to sacrifice his life. A big brown rat scurrying through the grass. Two jack rabbits coming from the fig orchard. Four cottontails playing and frisking in front of the house. A bunch of quail feeding at the back door. A few ducks flying high. Guess they are going to see Jim O'Neal and mayhap do some petting on the bay shore. Tiny field mouse sitting on a bunch of grass. Mocking bird feeing its young. Some gulls flying from the bay their white wings flashing in the morning sun. Some killdeers running bout the barn lot. A scizzortail sitting on a fone pole. A pretty bird with fine coloring. Redwing blackbird, its throat bursting with song. Several English sparrows having a family fuss. Just like humans. A road runner strutting across the road to be lost in the grass. A long-legged crane standing in a bunch of rushes. Reminds me of a Japanese picture. Big red fish jumps from the water and falls back with a splash. Rather have him on the table. One goose flying south. Must be an advance agent. He, too, is going to see Jim O'Neal. Just a few morning observations. The man who delights to say untrue things about the community in which he lives will probably always be with us. He is often called a "knocker" but 'it's an ill term for a good knocker is a thing to be desired. He is a builder and a necessity. As for the other bird I have made up my mind that I will no longer waste any esoteric ratiocinations on him. Let him go his way. He never can harm truth. Austin Jenkins home from the wild and wooly west. Wonderful improvement in this fine young man. New family arrives. Room for more, for like hell, we need people. Nine East Texas farmers here looking for locations. Guess they heard of our great cotton crop. Bale to the acre is common. This means more then $120 gross income from one acre of land. Enough to pay for the land three times. What more does man want? Figs howling for rain and Sam Sims joining in the chorus but still spraying the trees and incidentally himself. He is nowadays something of a bluebird. Last week my copy read, "Robert Murry turning detecative." The printer evidently thought I could not spell so he corrected it to read detective. Just spoiled one thought. Quite a difference between a "detecative" and a detective. Frances Eisle and Elizabeth Hill leaving for school at Marshall. Girl with a face of pearly whiteness down to the jaw line and then a black stringy neck. Suppose she painted in sections so as to show a contrast. I advise painting to the waistline for then it might fool some people. Louise Walters and Miss Thompson home from a summer of study at the Texas U and ready to fill the young idea full of new ideas. Bob Thompson will escort the kiddies from home to school and return. How time flies. In a few days us box renters will find a slip, "Box Rent Due." Vernor Bowers back on the job after a splendid vacation in foreign parts.
Collegeport Woman's Club going to Gulf to attend the County Federation meet. Wish Dena H. was here to attend. Wonder why the men do not organize a county federation of commercial clubs, meet with each other, discuss county problems and have enjoyable affairs. Gosh, but it is hot this day. Wish I had some of Mrs. Mowery's "Extrasodelicious" ice cream. I enjoy criticism but not always with the same enjoyment do I receive compliments. Criticism most always is sincere but compliments often are mere adulation, praise, flattery, laudation, encomium. This week I have received some compliments and some criticisms as for instance while Mary Louise was in Bay City a woman reader of the Trib asked if she was the daughter of Harry Austin Clapp and on receiving an affirmative reply says, "Tell your father that I enjoy his column and read it first." A woman from San Antonio writes, "We thoroughly enjoy 'Thoughts' and clip them out and send to friends who share our enjoyment." And now comes from the land of the Illini a wow. It makes me think that the writer must be a descendant of the defenders of starved rock. The envelope was addressed to Mr. H. A. Clapp, Collegeport, Matagorda County, Texas, and in the lower corner was inscribed these words, "Expert on Pedal Extremities." You see how impossible it is to keep fame down. I am recognized as an expert. That gives me a real kick. This woman wrote, "We get a great kick out of The Tribune and I cut out all the leg editorials to send you but I never seem to have enough gray matter to send them off with some brilliant remark, but we do enjoy your column. If I should be fortunate enough to ever visit Collegeport I will most certainly cure you of gazing. It isn't decent anyway--where the charms are so boldly displayed they lost their lure--they are much too obvious and when there is no joy of the quest--there is no pleasure in the flaunting. It would seem that the Chinese custom should prevail--that I should go to you for advice--not giving you such necessary counsel, but this is an inverted age. Oh, for the good old hoop-skirt days when Grandads were Grandads, not peeping Toms." I leave it to the Tribune readers if this isn't a regular wowwow. It is impossible for me to vision this woman as having skinny, bow legs or even one leg so am betting money that she has at least two perfectly beautiful legs and I hope she will visit Collegeport and give me opportunity to do some more gazing. It will be good for my failing eyes.
"Gratitude is a fruit of great cultivation; You will not find it among gross people." --Johnson
The first day of school Louise Walters said, "I take pleasure in giving you 81 in Spanish," and the pupil replied, "Make it 100, Miss Walters, and thoroughly enjoy yourself." Pythagoras, when asked what time was, answered that it was the soul of this world. I read in one of my papers that there need be no worry about the decreasing supply of wood for if our politicians will get their heads together the state of affairs will be remedied. Solid mahogany. Eddie Foy used to sing, "Daddy wouldn't buy me a bow-wow. Daddy wouldn't buy me a bow-wow. He bought a little cat, but I don’t' think much of that for I rather have a bow-wow-wow." I sang the same song but no one answered until this morning when E. L. Hall brought me a dandy pooch. It is from the celebrated Liggett kennels and is out of Queen and by Rusty which insures extra fine breeding. Mostly white with black points, fat as butter and lazy as any regular royal bred bow-wow has a right to be. I have named him "Hell" just because he is a helluva fine pup. He already knows his cognomen and yawns when he hears it. This shows intelligence and the ability to absorb education. I expect him to develop into something more than remarkable, for he has four sturdy legs and a tail. If he does develop I shall write another "Thoughts about a dog" and incur the criticism of one of my good neighbors and perhaps Carey Smith will lost another subscriber. Who knows?
"It’s the running expense that keeps father out of breath."
Jack Holsworth taking a fair one in his "cabaret" to the Gulf game. Tuesday we celebrated a double birthday. Mary Louise was sweet seventeen and her mamma was--I dare not tell, but she has more years to her credit than Mary Louise. We used the birthday gift of a set of new dishes and had guests and good eats and a happy day, but the letter we looked for never came. Suppose Havana is too far away. Well, to make a long story short, two boxes of delicious candy and Doc sent special to me some extra fine seegars. Guess he wanted to get my mind off R. J. R. but the only thing that will do that is for Ben Mowery to sell three bales for two bits. I read in the papers that twenty dollar gold pieces are being put into circulation. There is only one man in this burg prepared and that is Sam Sims. His canvas money pouch is two feel long and strong enough to hold half the treasury reserve. Charles Knot and Elizabeth Bow were married recently. Won't be long before we will have some little bow-knots. Another family moved into town this week but still like that other place we need people. Mrs. Chiles taking her family and some friends to Palacios. E. H. Holsworth being tired of hanging round this burg takes a trip to Galveston. Guess he wants to visit Miss Galvestone but, anyway, he came back and reported a good time. We have a woman in this town with a wonderful sweet face unadorned by artificial paints and powders. She weighs maybe 140 pounds, well formed, sweet, gracious, hair bobbed, of course, but allowed to hang as nature intended it should, in graceful curves. Her bearing is dignified but affable. I notice that as she passes along the street every man stops smoking or chewing his cud for a moment and allows at least one eye to wander, for she is good to look at, the personification of health. Her name? O, guess. Better look in the Trib's educational column. Her name appears at times in the personal column. Better subscribe.
Matagorda County Tribune, September 9, 1927
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Mr. Jack Holsworth sold his herd of some 80 or 85 head of cattle this week. Mrs. Tom Hale and baby are here visiting her parents, Mr. and Mrs. Fulcher. Mr. and Mrs. Robert Mundin from Topeka, Kans., are new residents of Collegeport. Mrs. Holsworth of Collegeport and her guest, Mrs. Morris are visiting Portsmouth this week. Mr. Berryhill, from Wrightsboro, Texas, is here looking over the field for prospective Pastorship. The recent rains which we have been having in the last week will be a great benefit to the fig orchards here in producing a heavy fall crop. A Few Jokes From Collegeport The early settlers started this country, and it’s those who settle on the first of each month that keeps it going. Sleepy Girl (to her small brother:) Willie, put Bob Thompson’s hat down; you might damage it. Besides, he will want it in a few minutes. Cecil McNeal says his automobile was made to carry only five passengers, but it will carry seven in a pinch if they are all well acquainted. Jack Holsworth of Collegeport says now is the time to take out your insurance. He says, “Take out a policy. One of my customers broke her arm last week, and we paid her $98. You may be the lucky one tomorrow.”
Many a home in Collegeport is like a radio,
Palacios Beacon, September 15, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
"Heart on her lips, and soul within her eyes, Soft as her clime, and sunny as her skies." --Byron.
There is no doubt in my mind that when Byron wrote these words he was thinking of Collegeport else where did he get the inspiration? Climate is the one great and unchangeable factor in the development of any country. We can build up poor soil, we can get along fairly well with poor water but climate such as is enjoyed in the Texas MIDCOAST and especially in and about the town of Collegeport is the greatest blessing which God can grant to any people. Our good friend, Noah Webster, defines climate as "the condition of a place in relation to various phenomena of the atmosphere, as temperature, moisture, etc., especially as they affect animal or vegetable life."
Shakespeare says in his poetic way that climate is "a place to dwell."
Doctor Van Wormer, president of the Collegeport Fig and Orchards Company, visited here this week inspecting the work of Sam Sims and the orchards and expressed himself well pleased. I talked with him for an hour and was impressed with his modesty, honesty of purpose, conservatism, sincerity. He is ambitious for the community but his ambition is not the sort that "o'er leaps itself and falls on t'other side." He has a big contact on his hand, the largeness of which he fully appreciates but he intends to pull through and that means better times for us burghers. He caught a red fish four pounds. Anyway, it was a whale of a fish for it bent his pole double and almost pulled him into the bay. Springfield folks are hereby advised to take a good dose of salt when they listen to his fish stories. He will sure tell some whoppers. He hung onto a gar six feet long but it bit one of the piles in two places and ran away. We have nothing to lose and some good things to gain. Wish I might repeat many of the items he mentioned as being on the card for the progress and development of the Collegeport district. Said he met Burton Hurd and Burton told him that while he was forced to live in Chicago his heart was in Collegeport and he intended to come back and the Lord hasten the day is my prayer. Of course we want him to bring Dena H. along. Climate is immutable. God made, God given and without the wonderful climate none of us would care to exist in this country. Thank God that under his law it is unchangeable, guaranteed for every day and every year.
Any man can build up the poorest of soils and this fact has been proven by the Illinois experiment station. Any man can utilize water, poor as it may be in quality, and manage to exist but no man can handle these factors unless he has a climate that matching his own intelligent powers will enable him to change these other conditions. Milton writing about climate has this to say, "Immutable, immortal, infinite, Eternal King," and 'tis the truth. The writer has lived here for nineteen years and has carefully observed climatic conditions, for several years being a volunteer weather observer. The past summer he has watched the thermometer closely. Three times, perhaps four to be safe, the temperature has risen to 94. This, of course, taken in the shade. These temperatures all the time being tempered with the salty, cooling breezes from a thousand miles of smiling seas has given us this wonderful climate that makes us believe that we are favored by the gods. Who can live here summer and winter for several seasons and desire another climate? When people of the North are shivering in 15 below we have balmy skies and very seldom does the temperature fall below 25 above. Sometimes it goes below, not often, but when it does it is for a day or two and quickly swings back to normal which in the winter season runs from 35 to 50 or more. Oh, yes, God has been good to us in climate and that is one reason, aye the principal reason why we raise a bale of cotton to the acre, why figs grow to the greatest perfection, why tomatoes acquire a color and flavor unknown outside this particular one, why cotton has a longer and stronger staple, why grass grows the year round supplying pastures when less favored sections are devoid of feed or any sort, why watermelons and cantaloupes are juicier, sweeter and acquire wondrous size as proven by the melons grown by Carl Boeker that weighed almost but not quite, one hundred pounds of sugary, honeyed sweetness; why roses and flowers of all kinds bloom the year round; why semi-tropical plants thrive and in many cases fruit. In a few words, 'tis a wondrous climate. The climate supplies air so clean, pure and clear that we have high visibility with the present style of female dress. This alone should appeal to the grand army of rubberers who live in the North.
"Sweet is the breath or morn, her rising sweet With charm of earliest birds; pleasant spreads When first on this delightful land he spreads His orient beams, on herb, tree, fruit and flower, Glistening with dew." --Milton.
E. L. Hall hunting for a knock in his Dodge motor which is elusive, baffling, frustrating, thwarting, foiling. Any one knowing how to find such a knock kindly send information to E. L. Hall and receive generous reward. Mary Louise buying groceries. Oscar Chapin down Sunday to shave the town. He said that so far as he could observe cotton and rice farmers got their money easily but he had to do considerable scraping to get his. Guess we have others who do the same. Wonder where Ora is? Woman's Club holding a reception for the school teachers at Mrs. Liggett's. Around 140 pound of fat coming in twice each week. Pretty fair but not enough to supply the public with Morning Glory butter. Eight farmers from East Texas have found locations in and near by Collegeport. R. H. Munden arrived with family and will build a house and barn on the farm owned by Dr. H. M. Hittner, of Kansas City. Several other buildings projected. I do not know whether there are any houses in hell or not but we need not only houses but people to dwell in them. A woman of this community, a recent arrival, told me the other day that this was the most God-forsaken place she had ever seen. The poor woman knew not of what she spoke. God never forsakes any portion of this globe. He is at the north pole and the south, at the equator, in the temperate zones, in every clime and He is certainly in Collegeport as most of us can testify from abundance of evidence.
Everyone sympathizes with the chronic grouch when he has to be by himself. Mrs. E. H. Holsworth giving an afternoon reception in honor of Mrs. T. C. Morris. Ben R. Mowery installing a fountain in his sunken garden. All the boys and girls are singing "will you meet me at the fountain?" This week we lost one family and Houston gained one. After weeks of dry weather we have the welcome rain and I think of "The Midnight Mass" by Longfellow.
"The hooded clouds, like friars, Tell their beads in drops of rain."
The other week I wrote that the death rate for Collegeport was very small being only one per person and now comes a local Dumdora with the remark that the percentage of airplane accidents is also very small--only one to a person. If she don't watch out she will be pinched some day for snuggling. This wonderful climate also produces smart folks. Some of my Springfield readers do not understand about this "nine-foot sidewalk" and so I will explain that the term is used in a metaphorical sense, in other words figurative, allegorical, symbolical, if you know what I mean. The nine foot sidewalk means a concrete slab nine feet wide with a shoulder on each side made of gravel and four feet wide thus giving us a seventeen foot road. Rest easy, good people of Springfield, some of these days you can ride into Collegeport on a cement roadway. We hope Gustafson will soon be busy on our nine foot sidewalk. F. L. Jenkins has located eight farm families during the last few weeks and turned seventeen families away because of the lack of housing. The climate, the soil, the water, brought these people to this section and we hope that all make extra good crops in this land of super-superlative climate. F. L. Jenkins is one first-class farmer who year in and year out makes good and as Montaigne says, "The only good histories are those that have been written by the persons themselves who commanded in the affairs whereof they wrote." Hugo [Kundinger] still owns his lots on Central Avenue and better put his pharmacy on wheels and move back. If he does it will mean increased sales of the "sodelicious" ice cream. Good as it is, not all will walk ten miles to obtain it, when that "extrasodelicious" grows on the bay shore. Mrs. Welsby making deviled eggs. Naughty, naughty they must be to have such a name. Sam Sims with his truck stuck in the mud. Wonder if he said xyesazftd? These rains sure make the figs look up and smile and that means extra heavy fruiting and gobs of that most delicious of fruits for Northern folks to enjoy. Thermometer stands at eighty this day.
Has an echo in my heart; And a thousand dreamy fancies Into busy being start, And a thousand recollections Weave their air-threads into woof, As I listen to the patter Of the rain upon the roof.
Now in memory comes my mother, As she used, in years agone, To regard the darling dreamers Ere she left them till the dawn; So I see her leaning o'er me, As I list to this refrain Which is played upon the shingles By the patter of the rain." --Contes Kinney.
Matagorda County Tribune, September 16, 1927
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Mrs. G. S. Welsby has rented her farm and will live on the Van Ness place during the next few months. Mrs. Emmit Chiles and children drove to Lane City where she will visit her mother for a few days. Collegeport Jokes All men are born free and equal, but some get married. If women wore trousers, they’d get up in the middle of the night and steal money from themselves. John Merck wants to know what a hero is. I guess we will have to tell him. A hero is a man who will kick his mother-in-law on the shin and not run. Miss Crystal Thompson, while attending the ball game at Palacios Sunday afternoon, unfortunately got in the path of a struck ball and was hit on the bounce.
Quite matchless are her dark brown iiiiiiiiii,
Palacios Beacon, September 22, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Editor's Note: Mr. Clapp writes that he thinks his readers will agree that "Thoughts on Silence" is about the best thing he has offered. Matagorda County Tribune,
September 23, 1927 |
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Collegeport, Sept. 27.—Recent rains have caused the rapid ripening of figs and the cannery of the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company opens Monday. Officials of the company state that the entire pack has been sold in advance and will be shipped in Illinois in five-gallon cans.—Bay City Tribune.
Palacios Beacon, September 29 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas.
[Portions about Joseph in the Bible and Joseph Garibaldi deleted.]
Mrs. Merck sitting in her car writing to her children. If Dean and John would take the jump all of her kiddos would be safe on the sea of matrimony. Mrs. Chiles taking her family and Mary Louise to Lane City for the week-end. Bob Thompson bringing in the school kids. Nine more East Texas men here looking for locations. Geo. Welsby rents his farm and will join the ranks of agriculturists. The church congregation undecided as to who they will call as a pastor. Oscar Chapin scraped up several dollars Sunday. Children's party at the Ackerman's Saturday. Mrs. Chiles driving to Palacios to trade. Wonder why the Lord don't sick some man onto us as a groceryman. We need a gin to care for the big cotton crop that will be put in next season. Carl Boeker building several houses on the river lands. Sam Sims and his crew with Mesdames Sims and Boeker as bosses beautifying the library grounds. It is already the beauty spot of the burg. Mr. Crane handing out school supplies and taking in the coin. Every time one breaks an arm or leg, Jack Holsworth pays $98.00. Business should be good for there are many who would break both legs for that sum. Mr. and Mrs. Corse spending the weekend with their daughter at Blessing. Too far to walk so they auto. The fig company truck all dolled up with a new coat of paint. That's nothing for Sam Sims always looks after equipment. Figs this season although late have taken on extra quality, seem to be sweeter. Guess it's because of the extra care given them by the management, spraying, pruning, hoeing. I know of no fruit tree that loves individual attention as does the fig. It enjoys petting and in this it is shared by some of our other babes. Almost had a tragedy in my home the other day. The miserable wretch who is my wife found a note which read, "With a world of love, Anna." Diving dolphins, what a time I had explaining that it was written by a niece. Sam Sims brought me a bucket of those "figues" as the French would say and as I absorbed a few of them I thought how is it possible for so much honeyed sweetness to be wrapped up in such a small fruit but knowing that with God all things are possible I spent no more time thinking. Shakespeare said, "A fig for Peter," but in this case it was a bucket of figs for Harry or Sam. All things come to the fellow who waits and now I have been accused of being a knocker. Ye gods! what must a man do to be saved? Regardless of criticism I shall continue to write the truth as I see it for it is my belief that truth never harms any person, any country, any people. Mrs. Ashe's auto stalled. The train crew absorbing their morning stimulant at the Terminal café. A big sow running loose and rooting up the flowers and plants recently set out by Mesdames Boeker and Sims. The laws of Texas provide a way to stop such destruction. Paul Braden and Mary Louise delivering kerosene and gas. A. D. Phelps is some poet. Fig company giving the orchards another combing and tickling the trees which they enjoy as is shown by daily improvement. If a finer, sweeter, more profitable fruit grows I have never see it. Wish our Northern folks could come down here, take a stroll through the orchards and eat the fruit fresh from the trees. Am waiting patiently for criticisms on "Thoughts about Silence." Some guy will find fault with it. Carl Boeker getting ready to supply wood. Bout time, is my guess. Heard the fig whistle blow and thinking a fire had started went over only to find North Cable cleaning up after Friday's run and Sam Sims licking the sweet syrup out of the cooking vats. I had some of the lickings and 'twas good dope. Sunday School gave stunts Friday night and some were funny enough to cause a person to laugh. One did not reach the audience until all the characters were off stage, then it took. Better to be took late than never to be took. Mrs. Mowery spoiled a batch of that "extrasodelicious" cream with salt. Sixty days in jail for such crime would be mild punishment. Whenever Oscar Chapin needs extra money he runs his gas buggy down here and scrapes it up. E. L. Hall having a birthday party at Mrs. Liggetts. Ice cream and among the trimmings a big angel food cake with, O, I can't say how many candles but more than sixteen.
Last week a cow swiped my glasses from my face with her tail switching and slamming them up against the barn door I was blind for six days. This caused me to write that wonderful inspiration, "Thoughts on Silence," which appeared in last week's Trib. I told Carey that it would not peeve me if he considered space too valuable. He replied that he considered it one of the best things he had ever published and I agree with him. If most of us would read that story and practice its teachings the world would be saved heaps of strife, heartaches and there would be fewer divorces. This week's offering is dribble compared with it. Anyway, we put up at home with the help of the miserable wretch forty-eight jars of figs and Sam Sims with the help of a half dozen ladies put up many gallons. The fruit this year is excellent and ought to please the dainty palates of those up North who will absorb them. Mrs. Liggett making a mysterious drink at the Sunday School entertainment. Frank King said it had quite a tasty taste and took another. I joined him for 'twas good liquor even if Mesdames Carrick and Clapp seemed not to agree with me. Wonder what has become of D. P. Moore. Don't see his big "ad" any more. It appeared in same place and looked like a friend to me.
Matagorda County Tribune, September 30, 1927 |
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Mrs. Tom Hale has returned to Collegeport after a weeks’ visit in Bay City. Mrs. S. Gaines of Ganado, was a visitor of Mr. and Mrs. S. B. Sims last week. The Collegeport Industrial League held its monthly meeting at the home of Mr. Gus Franzen Thursday evening and Mr. Bob Thompson was taken in as a new member. A style show and wedding was giving at the Community House by the Woman’s Club Friday evening, the proceeds being used for the benefit of the Library. A record crowd attended and a pleasant evening enjoyed by all. The Collegeport Fig Orchards Co. opened their cannery here Sept. 23, and have continued most every day since that date. The tonnage of figs are turning out very satisfactory considering the age of trees which are only 2 years old. The figs are being canned in one gallon cans for hospital trade in Illinois and other points north.
Palacios Beacon, October 6, 1927 |
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This is to give you notice that I hold under lease from Collegeport Rice and Irrigation Company, seventeen thousand Eight Hundred (17,800) acres of land located on and adjacent to Matagorda and Tres-Palaciso Bays in Matagorda County, Texas. No hunting of any kind or character will be allowed on said premises. For your better information the lands leased by me include what is known as Mad Island, Portsmouth and Oyster Lake, all of the above mentioned places are within my inclosure. With this notice you may expect to be prosecuted should you hunt upon said land. Yours truly, G. A. Duffy
Palacios Beacon, October 6, 1927 |
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It just so happens that in my daily personal contact with the people here in Collegeport that we have some “knockers” here. All this has led me to certain conclusions—things that are worth thinking about—things that you ought to know. Is it not true many people born and raised right here and are satisfied here, but are continually “knocking” this community? Is it not true that these people feel that one is robbing the other and so on? All this is purely a state of mind that has its destructive effect in this community as a whole. These tactics only defeat your own purpose and make the task of building up this community much harder for everyone. What does all this mean? It means the tearing down of this community, and that you are defeating your own ends by causing a general disbelief, on the part of the buying public. My observations have naturally led me to think of what really could be accomplished if a closer co-operation of everyone in the community could be had. In as fine a community as we have here as present, it can easily be remedied. To begin with, I would suggest and recommend that everyone, as far as humanly possible, join and attend the monthly meeting of Collegeport Industrial League and let people know you are a “square shooter” and that you are for the betterment of OUR community. Such contact as the League will offer, will allow you to give and receive new ideas for a greater and better community. The next thing I would recommend would be a greater and friendlier exchange of ideas in regard to cotton farming, vegetable growing, rice farming, vegetable growing, rice farming and many others. In fact, you will find that often these so-called “farming secrets” don’t really amount to anything, and if you were to interchange them, you and your neighbor would both profit by them. This is not theory—it is fact. It has worked out in other communities where they have combined and given each other the advantage of their ideas on the successful farming methods. At first this may not sound logical but if you will think it over you will find it is very true. The most instructive thought I have it that you stop knocking YOUR community. By helping one another you will do more for yourself and for everyone concerned. 75% of the time in the League meeting is devoted to a discussion of the betterment of this community. The above suggestions are just a beginning. Co-operation is probably the greatest force today in building up this community of ours. Through co-operation you will increase your land sales, through co-operation you will raise better fruits, vegetables, cotton, cattle and rice. Co-operation is purely a state of mind—it means faith and trust in the members of this community. “ARE WE GOING TO GET IT?” By Adna Emerson Phelps
Palacios Beacon, October 6, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp
Mrs. Crane selling tablets. Sam Sims rounding up fig pickers. Seth Corse returning from a trip to Blessing and again selling stamps. Mary Louise expert fig canner. George Welsby moving to town. Hugo [Kundinger] trying to get his light plant to light. Being Treasurer of the church he is disbarred from using proper language. Bob Thompson bringing in a load of kiddies for school. Jack Holsworth taking a party of friends to Palacios. Wonder who sat in the hind most seat. Pretty cozy I guess. Miss Thompson and Mary Louise singing in church both using different keys. Wonder when Carl Boeker will cut wood. Mrs. Walters making extra fine yeast. Smoke rising from the stack at the fig canning plant. Looks good to muh. The burg sure is growing for one more person has moved in. We need ten thousand more so come on. I have a niece, in fact several. All are well educated, sweet, lovable, but his one has an accomplishment that the others lack. She can wiggle her ears. Years of practice has perfected this and now she can wiggle them in opposite wiggles at the same time. This puts her ahead of all other nieces and girls and makes her extraadorable. Hope she teaches the trick to her daughter. Homer Goff talking about the evil of strong drink. Wonder how much experience he has had. John Heisey enjoys drawing water from his new water works. One critic tells me that I should not write so much about Sam Sims and his fig work, another says I do not write enough about the fig industry at this place. Which way shall I turn. Will some one inform me how I can please both of these well meaning critics? Personally, I think the fig a very fine fruit and a profitable crop and I think Sam Sims is a most excellent manager for the company.
In a few days all members of the Collegeport Industrial League will be allowed to ride in Hertz, Drivur-self-autoes, thanks to the management. Some miscreant robbed the P. O. box of Emmitt Chiles, abstracted the mail, opened it, read it, tore it up and distributed it along the sidewalk between the P. O. and the schoolhouse so the thief evidently has his lair west of the P. O. Pretty serious business. Good-bye the circular garters over which the flapper rolls her hose. The Docs now say that their use ruins shapely legs. Nuf sed. We all know that girls would rather lose the sight of both eyes than to deprive the male of the species the opportunity to gazing at beautiful legs. They enjoy going as near naked as possible. If the scientific Docs that give farmers so much advice can inform him how to get $10 for the hog that cost $15 to raise he will be rendering a service. Noah defines anonymous as, "nameless; unknown nature; unknown authorship." Some low down hound is sending such letters to some of our good folks. The party is ashamed of such work or would sign his name. He is worse than the chicken thief who robbed the hen roost of L. E. Liggett. This guy left tracks but the latest thief seeks to rob character and leaves no trace. Ali Ben Abi says, "Believe me a thousand friends suffice thee not; in a single enemy thou hast more than enough."
No wonder the figs put up by the fig company have a sweetness that is extrasuperlative. Just glance in some day and witness the sweet faces of the canning ladies, neat, white dresses, clean hands. O, yes, they all have legs and one can see all varieties but they don't use them in any of the canning operations. The entire plant speaks of cleanliness and sanitary conditions. Hattie [Kundinger] mixing a lemon phosphate and a koke for a couple of heavy drinkers. Hugo taking his noon day siesta. Verner Bowers still holding up the poor men with R. J. R. at ten cents per bale. When will us fellows have relief from the oppressor? Mrs. Ackerman catching huge red fish, some of them weighing one hundred or less pounds, perhaps four pounds nearer right. At fifteen cents per pound makes cheap eating. Eggs at thirty-five cents not in same class. Big pack put up yesterday of those "Sweetheart of Collegeport" figs. All I know about this burg is what I read in the Beacon, and in the last issue I read that a certain farm woman will move to town. Wonder what becomes of her husband. Maybe he has departed this life. Butter fat advanced to 34 cents. By same mail I find that butter now sells for 48 cents. Too much margin. Our cow milkers should receive at least 38 cents for fat. A ten cent margin down here is enough for any creamery to operate on. Montreal creamery pays for fat the same price they sell butter for and does a profitable business but I realize that Montreal is way up in Canada and Collegeport is way down south and conditions are different. Eggs are selling at 35 cents but as usual the hens are not on the job. I advise every father and mother to read The Frightful Pace of Modern Jazz on page 22 of the October Ladies Home Journal by Judge William McAdoo, chief magistrate of New York City. The field he writes from is larger than the one in which we live, conditions are somewhat different, opportunities for slipping from God and His Church are more numerous but we have conditions right here in Matagorda County that fit the place. Read it and ponder well. Keep the kiddoes close to the Church and its teachings. Encourage them to affiliate with the Young People's Service League, Christian Endeavor and other such agencies. It means saving souls. It means retaining and growing of the sweetness of young girls' lives. A shingle nail is a very small thing. It has little value and yet the human body contains about as much iron as is found in a small nail. Eliminate it and death follows. I am very glad to know that somewhere in my body is a shingle nail.
Twenty thousand dollars of autoes were parked outside the community house Friday night while one hundred and fifty of our burghers laughed themselves into spasms as the witnessed the style show and Negro wedding presented by the Woman's Club under the direction of Mesdames Crane and Boeker. Many of the audience were eating ice cream cones and at times tears flowed down their cheeks and dropped into the cream but they seemed to like it salty and continued sucking the delicious "nueve de leche." The style show was presented first and depicted the styles for the last fifty years. There came hoop skirt, the long train, the hobble skirt, the skirt with a slash which party revealed and then the dress of 1927 which concealed nothing and proved the old saw that "legs is common." Miss Ruth Mowery was the announcer and carried her part to perfection. In the wedding scene Mr. Nubbins (Mrs. Sims) as father of the bride. Exzima Fertilizer Nubbins (Mrs. King) was easily the star performer. The groom Radio Akin Korn (Mrs. Nelson) confessed to have been married five times notwithstanding the confession Parson Reverend Hambone (Mrs. Boeker) pronounced them "man and woman." Mrs. Boeker had plenty of opportunity to display her ability as a comedian and was gotten up "fit to kill," but she survived and was allowed to go home to her family. Lize (Mrs. Clapp) and Mr. Nubbins sang that beautiful song, "Somewhere a Brat is Calling." As each sang in a different key the result was enough to start the tears in the eyes of many. A Negro wedding cake was cut which everyone seemed to enjoy an da cake walk finished the production. It was a scream from first to last but needed only a scream to enable the firemen to save the child. About $25 was realized by the producer which will be used to buy new books for the library. The troupe tried it out on the dog and the dog stood for it but it does not seem advisable to take it to the provinces.
Milburn McNeil back home for Sunday after a few weeks at Bay City High School. George Braden and his wife drove from Chalmers to see the wedding. Old timers will remember when Dena Hurd put on The District School, starring that wonderful English actress, Amanda Davis Van Ness. In this play Charley Judin fell into the well and Burton D. Hurd put eggs into the back pockets of Harry Clapp. Helen Holsworth was one of the pupils who was all the time asking the teacher, "Teacher, can I go out?" That was also a great production. If amateurs would only learn to direct their talk to the audience most of their stuff would go over but they always, as a rule, seem to think they are holding a private convention on the stage and talk to each other. Well, anyway, the show did not in the least interfere with the canning of figs for the factory is well stocked with bright shining gallon cans each full of the delicious product. The Allens bringing the first of the season oysters and as usual some of them nineteen inches long or perhaps less. The Industrial League held the regular monthly meeting at the home of Gus Franzen. After the business transacted Mrs. Franzen served ice cream that from its smoothness and quality must have been made from about 50 per cent cream. One of the most enjoyable sessions the League has ever had.
Wonder when Doc Harkey and his crowd will come down on that promised visit? Mrs. Boeker has had a menu prepared for many weeks and is wondering if she should consign it to the waste basket. I still hope Doctor will keep his engagements. If one will watch the cloud formations, and use just a trifle of imagination, one may see some wonderful pictures. Sunday night as I write these words a cloud north of the town shows a really wonderful likeness of the former German emperor. It lasted for about two minutes and then slowly faded away. I have seen horses, lions, giraffes, elephants, and many female and male figures, castles battlemented. George Welsby has sacrificed his bristling moustachios and thus disguised can easily go into the detective business for no one knows him the disguise is so complete. Old friends saw him yesterday at the Terminal Café and supposed another stranger had drifted into the burg. Pretty sporty for an old boy.
Matagorda County Tribune, October 7, 1927
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Collegeport, Oct. 10.--The fig canning plant has installed a fourth cooking steam jacket. The plant has operated every other day for two weeks. Figs are maturing rapidly, but the recent showers have caused many of them to split, such fruit being rejected.
Hubert Boeker is finishing the last of the rice crop which is turning out a good quality with a promising yield. It is reported that about 12,000 acres will be planted the coming season. East Texas farmers, who recently rented farms, are beginning to come in which promises a greatly increased cotton acreage with the 1928 season.
The Daily Tribune, Monday, October 10, 1927
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This is to give you notice that I hold under lease from Collegeport Rice and Irrigation Company, seventeen thousand eight hundred (17,800) acres of land located on and adjacent to Matagorda and Tres-Palacios Bays in Matagorda County, Texas. No hunting of any kind or character will be allowed on said premises. For your better information the lands leased by me include what is known as Mad Island, Portsmouth and Oyster Lake, all of the above mentioned places are within my inclosure. With this notice you may expect to be prosecuted should you hunt upon said land. Yours truly, G. A. Duffy.
Palacios Beacon, October 13, 1927 |
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Mr. and Mrs. R. G. Murphy will arrive here on or about Oct. 15 to start a store and build some new homes. Mr. and Mrs. Murphy are from Springfield, Illinois. A boat ride was enjoyed by the young people of Palacios and Collegeport, on Friday evening, October 7th. Seven from Collegeport and twenty-six from Palacios were on board when the Claire M, with Captain Richards at the wheel, slowly glided out toward the Pass. When several miles out, the hum of the motors ceased and the table was spread with delicious things to eat. The supper was greatly enjoyed by everyone. The boat left Palacios at 8:20 P. M. and returned at 10:35.
The “Claire M” left the pier at twilight,
The boat rocked by the captive breeze, Collegeport Joke List
(A small boy in Bayview School:)
Teacher: “Johnny, what are the two genders?” Mr. Ash wants to know if you ever saw “A man that lived long enough to do all the things his wife wanted him to do?”
Palacios Beacon, October 13, 1927 |
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A Little Boy
Once there was a boy. He went to the bay and went in
swimming. He got gravel and put it on the pier and he shoved it off. He
caught cabbage heads. Then he went home. The Three Puppies
One time a little girl and a woman lived in a house.
They had company. She told Herb to go out and play. He went to the door
and saw three puppies. He picked them up and began to play with them.
One of them went mad and bit Herb and she died.
Matagorda County Tribune, Friday, October 14,
1927 |
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The following telegram has just been received by the Collegeport Industrial League: "Am happy to inform you that Mr. and Mrs. P. G. Murphy are coming to Collegeport on or about October 15 to open a grocery store and put in a filling station and build some new homes. We have much to show people there and why not boom the place and watch it grow? Letter follows." This is good news for our people and the Murphys will receive a warm welcome and good support.
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Thoughts On Harry Austin Clapp's Silence By a Chicago Subscriber Thoughts on the silence of Harry Austin Clapp, as portrayed in a recent issue of The Matagorda County Tribune, was almost too much for one Chicago reader, at least, to bear. So poignant was the sting of disappointment that this reader implored, begged and commanded the other half of himself to "do something" about it. The writer scarcely knows what can be done about it at this late date. The "thoughts" of Harry Austin Clapp, in the mind and heart of this Chicago reader, go hand in hand with Arthur Brisbane; the "noise" of Dr. Frank Crane: "Once Overs by J. J. Mundy; "Listen World" by Elsie Robinson; "Letters of Will Rogers," and as to the "thoughts" of O. O. McIntype--these are often overlooked entirely, especially on Mondays, which bring to the evening lamp glow "Thoughts" by Harry Austin Clapp. The content of a worthwhile thought, be it sprinkled with some nonsense here and there, coming as it does from a part of the brain of a friend of other days that forgets not the days of "Auld Lange Syne," seems to hold fast that friendship formed when days were filled with toil and nights of rest beneath a southern moon held dreams of a land fair to look upon in dress of modernized development of the natural resources--rare rich gifts of a wise Creator, and keeps alive that fire of ambition and desire to make all dreams come true. Added to this, the coming of those "Thoughts" on Monday, the "silent night" for Radioland in all 36 of Chicago's broadcasting stations, sometimes brings into the Chicago domicile an occasional friend to listen in on DX programs from far lands--and always The Tribune, its editor and "Thoughts" bear comment worthy of a trained literary critic--On "silent night" the radio is tuned in on far distant stations and right well do we know that many beloved friends are too, listening upon the same waves that go murmuring through space and we seem not so far apart. This domicile has windows looking out upon the waters of the lake and at times seems most like "home" and brings many "thoughts" of the southland near the Tres Palacios Bay, but what the writer is trying to impress upon you is the writer has the same effect upon this fact that no other "thoughts" of any Chicago reader as those recorded in the column of "Thoughts" by Harry Austin Clapp. As to the subject most often commented upon in your column, it is noted that for two weeks past there has been nothing said. One week blank the other ignored the subject entirely. The absence of those comments do not disturb certain Chicago readers what-so-ever--there being some miles of beach presented in panorama to the North, the East and South, where, since the very early springtime thousands and thousands of every kind, length, breadth, girt, and shade have wont to amble forth in sheer display of extent and mingle with the waves and others--running, sitting, leaping, swimming, kicking and diving in such abandon of exposure that one can not distinguish the owner as to whether it be "he" or "she" unless trained by sight to know that the girls are they who wear the skimpiest suits and who are continually crowding the little remnant of hem called legs, while the boys and men, as if aware of the actual unsightliness of "some," are most often seen pulling at the hem of the "skirt" (!) in apparent endeavor to lengthen bottom line to a more modest elevation. No, the reader has not missed these comments enough to long for a return--besides from all "views" expressed by the enclosed late clippings, interest in the subject is lagging all the world over and apparently is being absorbed by the sterner sex called Man. The writer is glad you stopped in good season so as to not be called old fashioned by some 65 or 70-plus--modern flapper! Note the "views" expresses in clippings. If there were a better paper of its class than Editor Carey Smith's Matagorda County Tribune, if there were a better editorial page in any paper ever read of its kind, if there were a more interesting ramble of "Thoughts" than those of Harry Austin Clapp, the reader and writer of this world like to know "how come." If there are as many acres of beautiful land stretching across the horizon studded with more beautiful and brilliant blossoms and tall waving natural grasses ready to give their life to enrich agriculture; if there is a land where roses bloom and gardens give forth more abundantly; if there is a coast line where waves ripple more gently and give to man the products of the sea more generously; if there is a clime where summer's sun gives way to balmy breezes from the evening's deep incoming tide that lulls to rest man's tired nerves; if the universe holds one other spot where the moonlight is so purely silver; if there is a spot more deserving of the good that man can do, of a fullness of that virtue called brotherly love; if there is a place more deserving of all that man's work and wealth and time and talent and co-operation and his dreams can fashion, then would I were there to live for aye! Matagorda County Tribune, October 14, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp Collegeport, Texas
Hugo Kundinger unable to grow a bay window on his own princely figure builds one on the east side of his pharmacy. The help, female I mean, at the fig cannery were congratulating themselves on the fact that the steam from the vats, removed freckles and whitened their skin and now, that cold blooded Sam Sims put in a ventilator to remove said steam. Never mind, girls, Hugo sells freckle remover at reduced prices. A. D. Phelps absorbing a koke while Carl Boeker buys hinges. Three girls all using the same powder puff. One time girls were particular about such personal utensils but now days they swipe with the same old rag. Chicken stealing seems to be a safe and profitable business. Thirty-six disappeared from Ackerman's the other night. Ben Mowery, president of the school board, has a tractor and crew at work grading the school grounds. Verner Bowers taking lady friends for a ride. E. L. Hall has found the knock in his motor. The offered reward is withdrawn. I well remember the first time I witnessed the Black Crook and how shocked many people were. It was considered a man's show and not fit for ladies for the actorines wore tights and exhibited real legs, perhaps I should say limbs for legs were not the vogue in those times. Today, how different is everything, for legs is common and no man would give a penny to see girls in tights. Today they don't even wear tights for the flummiddiddies they were under scanty skirts are in no way a relative to tights. This morning I saw a girl standing beside an auto and as she leaned over her legs were visible--well, at least six inches above the knee. Who cares to see more? There used to be what is called "sex appeal," but that was long ago for it has been lost in the maze of crooked, bow leg, knock knees, beef to the hoof, and real beauties for there are many in the last class. Keep the spotlight on the beautiful legs with soft curves, well molded, artistic. Here is something refreshing: John T. Scott, president of the First National Bank of Houston, speaking of the craze for service charges that has struck the bankers, says, "We regret that we can not co-operate with the other banks in this matter. While it may seem strange, the purpose of a bank is not primarily to make money. While the stockholders are entitled to fair returns on their investments, we feel that a bank is in many ways a public institution." Mr. Scott pointed out the fact that many patrons of the banks who are now the heaviest depositors at one time had very small accounts. My father was a banker for forty years and I was in the business for fifteen years and we never refused an account because of its size. We figured that the owner of a small account was a friend and the more friends we had the better our business. The banks by putting on this service charge no doubt lost many close friends and incidentally considerable sums are withdrawn from trade. No bank does business on its own capital. They do business on the people's money and could not exist without it. Of course they render a service for its use, in most cases a generous service.
Well, anyway, I am glad that Gustafson is on the job and has secured such efficient aids. I hope that he will remember that the "nine-foot sidewalk" starting at Collegeport is as necessary to us as any portion of the county project. And, Gus don't forget that this sidewalk is to be nine feet wide and constructed of cement. Under a picture of a motor boat race, entitled, "A Water Thrill," is this explanation: "The start of the outboard motor boat race held in the waters of Lake Michigan at Detroit." The Chronicle better read up on geography. I don't blame Doc for not making that promised "good will" visit. He just can't move his people. Business men are damn glad to meet people in their stores but they won't give a damn to meet them in the home community. Undertakers will drive 35 miles to get a corpse but they refuse to drive a fraction of the distance to meet a live customer. Cackling chickens but 'tis a strange world. No wonder mail order business is good when one hundred dollars per day go to them from this small community. Bay City business houses could easily grab some of this if they would be a bit neighborly. One Monday I sent a mail order to a Bay City house and Friday night received the goods. The same mail took an order to Dallas and Wednesday night delivery was made. Dorothy Crane has decided to retire from the oil business and is now interested in Tennessee farming. A recent report showing the average production of cotton per acre for the last twenty seven years ..pounds per acre while in 1927 it was only 149.3 pounds. The greatest production was 209 pounds which occurred in 1904 and 1914. The lowest was in 1921 with 124.5 pounds. Cheer up, good people, for it will not be necessary to make frequent hikes to Palacios and Bay City for ten cents worth of coffee. Just received word from Dr. Van Wormer that Mr. P. G. Murphy (that's Pretty Good Murphy) will arrive here about October 15 and will open a grocery store and filling station and he will also build several new houses. Just as sure as you live Mrs. Murphy will come along and that's pretty good also. Hope he sells three bales of R. J. R. for two bits. The people of this burg should give him hearty support and giving him a warm welcome let him understand that we are sure glad to have him join us in making this place a bit better place in which to live.
Vernon Bowers taking a load of sweetness to the Port-Lavaca-Palacios football game. Party of young people taking a moonlight ride on the sparkling waters of the bay. V. R. Swansey buying a "Farmall" and will put in one hundred acres of cotton and fifty of feedstuffs. E. L. Hall now employs a "chiffonier" to drive his sport Dodge. I hope the first thing Pretty Good Murphy does after his arrival is to join the League. Mrs. Merck says that she knows how to start and stop a car and guide it when running but after that she does not claim to be an expert. Doctor Harkey has just issued a statement of the county cotton ginning that shows a possible production of 10,000 bales for the year. It is the best I have ever read of Matagorda County's cotton story. It is comprehensive, all-embracing, extensive, capacious, broad and bears the imprint of truthful conservatism. Emmitt Chiles home for an hour or two. Forgot his truck. "Monkey" Chiles with a crew of boys hauling sand and building a new tennis court. Something on the order of Boy Scout work. Wonder what Constance Talmadge will do without her MacIntosh. Maybe some stormy days ahead but she, no doubt, will find some other protector. Hope the next one will last longer, They say that (name deleted by censor) uses a shoe horn to ease into them. Suffering shrimps! can this be true? It don’t take much to make some men brag for Will Rogers writes that he bought a new car and did not pay all cash. That's nothing. I have never bought any car, and am not bragging about it either. Well, what do you know about this? The train last night brought in two men, seven mules and a car of household goods. When I made the trip from Chicago I was called a "Zulu," so guess these men must be Zulus. Anyway, they help the town to grow and like hell we need people. Room for a few more. Miss Aubyn Chinn, the nutritionist, writing in the New York World, has this to say, "The exhilaration of bouncing nimbly out of bed in the morning, before an open window, a brisk walk in the sunshine, a refreshing bath and a meal in which the vitamins of fruit, cereals and dairy products abound will increase anyone's stellar attraction." Miss Aubyn chinns too much and is one of the nuts that fill the columns of our papers with high brow stuff. I certainly bound out of bed and do it before an open window. I take a walk down in the cow pasture and sometimes the walk is a brisk run for the damn fools at times refuse to walk sedately to the barn. As to the morning bath, I am lucky to get it Saturday night if the miserable wretch and the sliver of the old block are out of the way. As to stellar attraction I dunno. Webster says, "stellar" means a star. If that is true, I often enjoy stellar attractions, especially when the old cow swipes me across my mug with a tail loaded with mud. Go on Aubyn and chinn some more.
Matagorda County Tribune, October 14, 1927
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Collegeport, Oct. 10.—The fig canning plant has installed a fourth cooking steam jacket. The plant has operated every other day for two weeks. Figs are maturing rapidly, but the recent showers have caused many of them to split, such fruit being rejected. Hubert Boeker is finishing the last of the rice crop which is turning out a good quality with a promising yield. It is reported that about 12,000 acres will be planted the coming season. East Texas farmers, who recently rented farms, are beginning to come in which promises a greatly increased cotton acreage with the 1928 season.
Matagorda County Tribune, Friday, October 14,
1927 |
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Mr. Tom Hale from Wadsworth is a visitor in Collegeport. Mr. E. Hultquist was a visitor in Collegeport Sunday, Oct. 16th. Miss Mary Louise Clapp left Monday for San Antonio where she will attend business school. Mr. and Mrs. E. Regnier from Los Angeles arrived this week and are looking over their interests here. An oyster supper, was given last Friday night at the Community House by the Woman’s Union. Oysters were served, with pie, coffee and sandwiches. The supper was enjoyed by everyone present. The Christian Endeavor held a Weiner Roast on the evening of Oct. 12th. A great many were present, the evening was spent in playing games. Buns, wieners, sandwiches and hot chocolate were served. The Weiner Roast was held at the home of Miss Louise Walters. The Collegeport Fig Orchards Co. continue canning figs for several weeks if weather conditions are favorable. The cannery and the canning of the figs has been a great success this season, though the trees suffered a set-back due to the extra dry spell during July and August. Mr. S. B. Sims, Orchard Superintendent, reports trees bearing well, considering them only two year old trees.
Palacios Beacon, October 20, 1927 |
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At last we can give a sign of relief when we know that Collegeport is growing and things are getting back to normal again. The story about Santa Claus may be a fairy tale, but there is something real about the rapid growth this little city is making. Just in the last week Bachman and Son of Bay City have opened up a grocery store in the east side of the Post Office. Mr. and Mrs. Harry Eisel are managing it for Mr. Bachman, they will carry a general line of groceries, fruits and feeds. Many families are moving into this community, five or six having moved in in the last week. Dr. Van Wormer can now settle back in his arm chair in ease, and can now proceed to dream of little things pleasurable here in Collegeport. And what imaginings are more delightful to indulge in than those concerning this fine community of ours. Fancy free are we on winter evenings and with spring looming up on the horizon, a bit of dreaming about this community’s activities is just the thing. The people of Collegeport should find it a joy in the planning and anticipation of the future development of this town. Spring is coming! Each day the sun is shining a few minutes later. Old King Winter appears to have the world in his grasp, but there is a revolution beginning silently to work. Little by little signs appear foretelling the rapid growth of Collegeport in 1928. Give Collegeport another chance and she will make a beautiful City by the Sea for us to enjoy. It is your city, a city for your home, your life, your health, and your fun. Plan now for the changes and improvements of Collegeport in 1928. --By Adna E. Phelps
Palacios Beacon, October 20, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp. Collegeport, Texas.
O, gee! O, gosh! O, geminy grimus! It seems as though I never could quit. It's just like all other bad habits. Hard to break away. Last week I made a solemn promise that this week's dribbling drool would eschew, shun, avoid, cut out, all reference to legs but Saturday night's mail brought a long letter from another Chicago woman who brings the subject all up and so I am obliged to comment, remark, observe, elucidate, expose. This woman informs me that she sees all sorts of legs cavorting on the sands of Lake Michigan and that it is difficult to tell by the undress the difference between male and female except the males look ashamed. She sends along with the leg dope a bouquet of flowers, sweet flowers, flowers I much rather have now so that I may enjoy their perfume than to have them rest on the glass top of my final overcoat. I have no use for flowers "after the ball is over." As for life,--
" 'Tis but a tent where takes his one day's rest, A Sultan to the realm of death addrest; The Sultan rises, and the dark Ferrash Strikes, and prepares it for another guest."
To make it more difficult for me to reform she sends several pictures of legs, seasonable legs, thin subjects, peaches before and after, see other side, slats. After viewing all these subjects and reading the comments which accompanied each picture I sighed and said, "What the hell, Bill? What the hell?"
"I sometimes think that never blooms so red The rose as where some Caesar bled; That every hyacinth the garden wears Dropped in her lap from some lovely head."
The flowers came from a lovely head and heart from a woman I know well, from a woman I have always admired and I love the flowers for the message they brought but, say, I wish she would come home, dragging the other half behind. If they would do this, the burg would be easier to live in. Mrs. Emmitt Chiles taking the miserable wretch to Palacios. Oscar Chapin here yesterday and just about cleaned up the town. Not a dollar left. Digging up old pipe is no easy job but it has to be digged or dug so I sweat and kuss at the kuss who laid it so deep in the ground. Jack Holsworth buying a fine bay hoss. Young man calling on Mary Louise Sunday night and wearing breeches, trousers, or pantaloons with bottoms at least 24 inches in circumference. Each leg would make a full skirt for some of our girls. Well we must keep up with the styles anyway. What the cotton loses by short skirts, the wool grower makes up in the larger consumption of wool used in such panties so guess the world evens up. Don't know as they were all wool but they certainly were a yard wide. All we ask is that Doc gives a week's notice and Mrs. Boeker will put up a feed that is appealing, elegant, nourishing, neat, fashionable, well prepared, delicious. When it comes to feeding guests this town double dares any community in the state. Many live customers down here and dead men are not common so it won't be necessary to bring an ambulance, except perhaps it may be useful in carrying home the overfeds. One of my critics calls "Thoughts" just common slush and as I read over some of the dribbles of the past I am forced to acknowledge that for once in his life he hits nail on the head. It is only small town stuff and I make no pretense, pretext, excuse, plea, claim, assumption, affectation, subterfuge, fabrication, that it is anything else. Not always truthful, at times a bit sarcastic, never knocking the good things, every trying to introduce a bit of humor, some little personality jokes which do not always take, but never, never intending to harm or injure any man, woman or child. I have too much love in my heart for this village and its people. The boiler at the fig cannery blew out another gasket Monday. Better quit that sort of business or we will need some caskets. Mrs. Cap Allen brought over a load of ice, eatables and some extra fine red fish the other day. One of the fish was at least sixty inches long, anyway half that and weighed perhaps two hundred pounds or maybe less. Anyway, I asked the price and she replied "fifteen cents if you take the whole fish but twenty if I have to cut it." As I did not need all the fish I told her to cut off two pounds and she handed me the knife and axe and told me to go ahead with the cutting so I cut my own fish and she taxed me twenty cents, just the same. Her relatives must have come from Jerusalem or some of those parts. It was fine fish and was enjoyed by the miserable wretch who is my wife as well as the rest of the Homecrofters. This fish was a brother to the one Doctor Van Wormer hung onto when he was here last month. Have been reading the past few days Tales from the Italian and Spanish. Very interesting a full of realism, romance, adventure and humor. These talks expose the soul of the Latin people, and are translations from the originals. Mexico always has been a "manana" country but from this time on they can put it up to Morrow. Ed Holsworth taking another passenger. Party from Freeport trying for red fish. We almost lost our postmaster Monday. It seems that he got mixed up in the crowd at the Buckeye station and missed the Portsmouth Special. His presence of mind bade him hire an auto and he arrived on time to give us the evening mail. But what I wonder is where he got the booze and why he did not bring me a quart or two.
Miss Mayfield, county nurse, making a friendly call on The Homecrofters. We are always glad to see May. Mary Louise going to Palacios to witness the movie Resurrection, and pronounced it good stuff but with an unhappy ending. Paul Braden has taken on a new partner in oil delivery. Mr. Pollard looking over Bay View Consolidated High School. The miserable wretch and Mary Louise refused to call my pooch "Hell" so I have named him Buckshot after Buckshot Lane of Lane City. If he reads this I know that he will be filled with pride. Buckshot Lane is a good fellow and the pooch is a dandy swell kloodle. Fare-you-well party in honor of Mary Louise at the home of Louis Walter with about fifty present eating weenies, sandwiches, cake and washing them down with cocoa. Woman's Club meeting with Mrs. Roy Nelson and figuring how they can spend the twenty-five dollars received from the Negro wedding. Woman's Union holding an oyster supper to hellup pay the preacher's salary. George Welsby building chicken houses on the Van Ness place. A. D. Phelps blossoms out a new suit of coveralls. The Terminal Café still handing out hamburgers and coffee. Hot dogs would be a welcome change I heard one patron say. The norther sent temperature clear down to 60 and everyone began to shiver.
"Leaves have their time to fall, And flowers to wither at the Northwind's breath And stars to set;--but all. Thou hast seasons for thine own, O Death." --Mrs. Hemans.
Stanley Wright delivering some extrasuperlative dry oak wood at a price that is fair. As for me, I am glad that Stanley and his mother are back here and anchored. Wonder how chickens escape from crates between this station and Galveston. Bet some one eats chicken. Looks as though we would soon be able to buy groceries in town. The Allens bringing oysters fresh from the bay and shucking them at your door. Some of them are nineteen inches long or less and run about 48 to the quart. Feel sorry for the poor folks who live on Lake Shore and Blackstone Avenue, especially during the season when Virginias Ostiones is in favor. The fig orchard opposite Homecroft is loaded with fruit which although late will be picked in time and put in those shining cans for Northern folks to absorb. A large hawk flying low and scanning the ground with its bright eyes. Suddenly it drops like a plummet and when it rises it talons hold a quail. It flies to a telefone pole to devour its prey but when I wave my hat it takes to the air, the quail feebly fluttering its wings. A snake skin complete from head to tail discarded by its owner and about five feet long. Burr-burr-burr, a covey of quail, perhaps thirty in number, whirl away from under my feet. A beautiful bull snake about five feet long hustles along to get out of the human's way. I let him go for he is a friend and destroys many field mice. One lone ant dragging along the trail a dead grasshopper. Along comes another ant, evidently from a rival nest for he attacks but is repulsed and leaves the field. In a few minutes he returns with several soldiers and with the combined strength he leaps on his foe and tears him into bits and then the victors seize the juicy plunder and drag it away to their own den. A long legged blue crane with a frog in its bill and I envy him for frog legs are good eating. A dead armadilla in the pasture. Some one had from the evidence struck it with a club simply to take a life. Harmless little animal. I like to see them lumbering along uttering their queer little hog-like grunts. Makes me think of army tanks with their armored covering. "We will drink deep of the cup of delight, my lover, and bathe in the wine of the gods. We shall feast on the tongues of nightingales, and rest on couches of flowers. And thou shalt cede me thy soul, beloved, and I will give thee mine . . ." The reader is left to imagine what the periods stand for. Just some of Eleanor Glynn's mushy gush but our girls read it with greediness. No wonder as Dorothy Dix writes, "Soon as the paint on the lips has been sucked off they quickly dob on the red so the lips may be ready for the next fellow."
"Eyes, look you last; Arms, take your last embrace; and lips, O! you. The door of breath, seal with a righteous kiss A dateless bargain to engrossing death." --Romeo and Juliet, Act v, Sc. 3.
John Merck taking a load of cotton to the gin. Dr. Pierre Higgins, of Fort Wroth, planning to fence his ten-acre lot and put it in cultivation.
Statistics recently released by the A. and M. experiment station reveals that while the average per acre production of lint cotton for Texas has declined since 1899 from 185 pounds to 113 pounds the decline in cotton grown on the black lands, which include Matagorda County have declined from 223 pounds to 135 pounds. This seems to prove that the heavy black lands of the coastal plains continue their productivity and it seem that with more modern handling that the production might be greatly increased. Nothing, it appears to me, can keep this section from being a great cotton field. Carey Smith works along sane and sensible lines, when he uses so much space to give publicity to the value of our lands for the production of this great cash crop.
Matagorda County Tribune, October 21, 1927
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Mr. Bachman and son from Bay City were visitors here Sunday. Mr. George Harrison has been repairing some of the culverts on Central Avenue. Mr. Hugo Kundinger has just completed a big fine bay window on the east side of his drug store. Hubert Boeker and Elmer Jones left this week by auto on a trip to Springfield, Illinois, and other points north. Mrs. S. B. Sims entertained with a bridge luncheon on Tuesday honoring Mrs. A. M. Weaver of Blue Island, Illinois, and Mrs. J. J. Gregory of Houston, who are the house guests of Mrs. C. E. Duller of Blessing. A tempting luncheon of several courses was served and a pleasant afternoon was spent in playing bridge. Other out of town guests were Mrs. Sisson and Mrs. Wagner of Palacios.
Palacios Beacon, October 27, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp. Collegeport, Texas.
When I was a lad living at home there hung on the wall a picture entitled "Leaving Home." It showed the room of a comfortable, homey hone, and the central figures were the father and mother, little sister and brother. The mother stood wringing her apron, tears coursing down her cheeks while the father stood with clinched hands, thus endeavoring to suppress his emotion. The sister and brother both held to the mother's dress and the boy who was leaving home stood with his back to the scene his body facing the great outside world, which was soon to engulf him, but his face was turned back with his eyes resting in loving wonderment on the figures of his parents. I was always fascinated with the picture but how little I realized what it all meant. The time came when I left home. I was bound for Poughkeepsie, N. Y., and my father took me to the train at 4 o'clock in the chilly October morning. He spoke little, and I wondered why, but now I know and I know now that I left at home my mother sobbing her heart out because she was losing her only boy and she realized that never again would the home be the same. My face was to the east and "The World Was Mine." I was ignorant of what I left behind but now I know and how I wish that God could turn back the flight of time and let me love my mother just once more. What a mother! I know now, too late, how she gave her very life's blood that her family might have comforts. I know now how she prayed for me and my future life. Is there anything in the world that approaches the love of a mother? If there is I have never found it. God bless the mothers.
This day is the anniversary of the day when my mother was gathered to her fathers. My little son not quite four years of age placed a pansy on his dead grandmother's breast. Today my turn comes, for Mary Louise leaves home to acquire a business education I know now how full of sorrow was the hearts of my parents for my own heart is full and that of the miserable wretch is full and overflowing. Other girls have had mothers, but no girl ever had a more devoted one than Mary Louise. She has given of her best every day, every year, and now while she is happy that her daughter has the opportunity to acquire additional education her heart sorrows. Mary Louise went away with head up and eyes facing her first adventure and all we can say is, "Please God be with her."
"I shall miss your laugh, your whistle, your song, I shall miss you all the day long, From early morn when I kiss open your blue eyes To see where the love light lies, Until I know you are safe in your pink bed And slumber comes to your tousled head." --Fragments from Hack.
I reckon most of the kids will miss Mary Louise just a little bit for they all liked her cheery ways. I reckon the C. E. will miss her in her work. I reckon the Sunday School will miss her presence. But it is here at home where something is gone.
"Her eyes Are blue as the Southland skies When Southland skies are bluest. Her heart, Ah, from that 'tis hard to part For such hearts are truest." --Fragments from Hack.
The Portsmouth Special came in Saturday night with two coaches. Guess biz must be picking up. To see the children climb over Tom Hale and cling to him gives the impression that they love him. No wonder for he is a fine young man. John Carrick's horsemobile ran away the other day dumping Mrs. Carrick and Mrs. Crane in the ditch and providing John with three broken ribs besides a choice variety of bruises. Ben R. Mowery with his grip starting a journey to foreign parts. Fig picking still going on and smoke coming from the canning plant. The King's Daughters meeting at Corse's this week. Guess I'll make a call and get a square meal for that is the sort they supply. Mrs. Chiles and family spending the week-end at Lane City. Hubert Boeker with Shorty for protection starting on an overland trip to California. Louis Walter shipping some of those contemporaneous eggs. The Fred Walter's and Shivers' places are now occupied by East Texas cotton farmers. George Harrison spent an hour with me yesterday and filled me full of dope about the "nine-foot sidewalk" and it looks as though work would begin sooner than soon. George is giving Collegeport good attention and will do some very necessary work at once.
"Sorrow's crown of sorrow is remembering happier things." --Tennyson.
Some one has said that in Europe they claim America is ruled by petticoats. If they will come to this burg they will see that it is not true. Robert Murry cutting hay. George Welsby getting ready to move into the Van Ness house. Myrtle Fulcher back from a long visit in Mont Belvieu. Cream still coming in at advanced price. Why does a cow break through a fence from a good pasture to graze on a poorer one? Any one tell?
Doctor Harkey spent Wednesday here culling hens for Mrs. Louis Walter. Doc is well equipped for this work for God gave him an x-ray eye, the left one, and all he has to do is to hold the hen up to the light and he can see the entire abdominal contents and count the little seed eggs and tell exactly what the end is able to do. The Bay City Chamber of Commerce is to be congratulated on being able to perform through its manager such wonderful service. The girls better watch out when he turns that left eye in their direction. Hattie Kundinger going to Palacios. Hugo keeping the home fires burning and serving cold drinks with or without. Interesting statistics recently released show the following facts about cotton: In condition per cent California was highest being 91 per cent, South Carolina lowest with 44 per cent, Texas per cent was 55. In yield per acre California led with 354 pounds, Florida lowest with a yield of 114 pounds while Texas showed 130 pounds. I wonder why Texas, a natural cotton country, could not equal California. Young Mr. Regnier here from California looking over the old home place. Cloud effects this morning as the sun rose from its bed were wonderful. For a few minutes one could see three stripes along the horizon, in the national colors of red, white and blue. The stripes appearing to be about 50 feet wide and several miles long. And then the sun peeped up and the waters of the bay moved by the east wind sparkled like a field of diamonds. Some pictures seen by those gifted with imagination. "Most men when they think they are thinking, are merely rearranging their prejudices."--Knute Rockne. Standing still means decay, going ahead means progress. The people of this community have it in their power to decay or to progress. Which shall it be? We are advised that Pretty Good Murphy left Springfield Tuesday morning.
Well, I went to the feed given by The King's Daughters and wonder how I ever walked home. The daughters certainly gave me a swell luncheon consisting of chicken with dumplings and wonderful gravy, rice with tomato sauce, potatoes in several ways, four kinds of pie, coffee. Just a simple luncheon, but, O, my, it was d-e-l-i-c-i-o-u-s. I wanted to join but my sex barred me out but I shall manage to sneak in again some day. The fig cannery operated until 1 o'clock a. m. yesterday. Figs coming in by gobs and splendid fruit. L. E. Liggett drilling a well for Duffy on the land leased from the Collegeport Rice and Irrigation Company. Be mighty fine if his drill would run into a brewery. It if does there will be no difficulty in settling up that section. E. L. Hall's Sport Dodge all dolled up with a new coat of duco. The village is growing fast for about ten new families have moved in and fall plowing is on. Looks as though some one would be interested in putting in a gin for it will be needed. O, joy, the surveyors are here making preliminary survey for our "nine-foot sidewalk." I read in the papers considerable gush about the Puritans and most of it is to me disgust. The Puritans were a bunch of religious fanatics who to escape persecution in Europe fled to the new America where they began a persecution plus. They put their fangs into happiness and joy and burned men, women and children at the stake because they would not or could not swallow the Puritans' religious views. My paternal ancestor, Roger Clapp, landed at Boston in 1630. I thank the Lord that in the history of his life I find little of the Puritan taint. He was a Godly man, a progressive man and a military man who for many years was captain of the Castle situated on the island which guarded the entrance to the harbor. I am glad that I am not a descendant of a rock-ribbed Puritan.
The San Antonio Express states that the hen of America lays 700 eggs every second. That's nothing to brag about for at that rate she only lays 22,075,600,000 eggs per annum and that means that each resident of the United States may consume only 184 eggs per annum or about three a week. Wonder if the Express in making this statement included the eggs produced by Mrs. Walter's fine rocks. If not I will be obliged to revise the figures. Well, anyway I look at it, the hen must get busy and lay twice the number else I will not get sufficient for my personal wants. As usual when we brag about farm production when it is figured down to a per capita basis we are startled to learn that the people of this bragging country are living on a mighty small margin of food supplies. Our per capita consumption of milk per annum is only 55 gallons which means less than a pint per day for each individual and that includes the milk used in puddings, cakes, pies as well as for drinking. Homer Goff says "the eyes of the world are upon us," and I wonder what good it will do us. What we need is the feet of the world, pressing the soil of Collegeport. No harm for the world to look but we need people just like hell. I rather have one man or woman come here to live than have the eyes of ten thousand turned this way. "The eyes of the world" is rather poetical and listens good but it is too much debunk.
"And, as imagination bodies forth The forms of things unknown, the poet's pen Turns them to shapes, and gives to airy nothing A local habitation and a name." --Midsummer Night's Dream, Act v, Sc. I.
Attended the Markham "Good-Will Trades Day" and must say that the local Chamber of Commerce did everything possible to provide nourishment and amusement for the visitors. They have two preachers in the town and each did his part. I think it an error for merchants to expect people to do much buying on such occasions. Ninety-nine and one half per cent go for pleasure and amusement and if these are provided, they go home pleased at having enjoyed a heluva a fine day. Every one I talked with enjoyed Markham's generous hospitality. The fig cannery runs until midnight, most of the time, so as to catch up with the fast ripening fruit which is brought in by Sims and his crew. Personally I like the idea of shutting down whistle blowing at midnight or possible at one a. m. for it wakes me from delicious slumber.
Matagorda County Tribune, October 28, 1927
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Arthur Grant, Negro, charged with killing another Negro with an ax at Collegeport some months ago, was put on trial today. A special venire of 100 has been provided for. Arthur Grant Given 10 Years for Murder Arthur Grant, Negro, was tried for murder this week and the jury, yesterday, gave him ten years. Grant was charged with killing another Negro at Collegeport, about a year ago, using an ax with which he all but severed his victim’s head. The verdict was returned quickly.
Matagorda County Tribune, Friday, October 28,
1927 |
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Rev. M. A. Travis is expected to arrive here this week on a business trip. Mr. Connor will preach at the Community Church next Sunday evening. Mr. and Mrs. S. L. Utsey are the proud parents of a nine pound boy, born Oct. 25th. The Collegeport Industrial League gave an oyster supper for its members and their families, Thursday night, Oct. 27th. The delicious oysters were served both raw and stewed. A very pleasant evening was enjoyed by every one. After the supper was served, several new members were taken in and a very interesting talk was given by Mr. George Harrison on the future development of the hard roads in this county. There is being proposed at the present time a plan for the construction of an Inn at Collegeport. It is to be of the Colonial design, all modern and arranged in suites to accommodate several families or individuals or tourists who wish to enjoy the wonderful sporting opportunities this country has to offer and for those who may come from other parts of the United States to look after their interests here. The Inn will be so arranged as to accommodate incoming visitors for any period of time they wish to stay, be it a day, week or a year.
Palacios Beacon, November 3, 1927 |
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Largest
Commercial Organization In Smallest Town in Thursday night was the regular
meeting of the Collegeport Industrial League and its members celebrated
with their annual oyster feast. Hugo Kundinger the greatest oyster cook
in George Harrison of Palacios was present and delivered an interesting talk on good roads plan. He gave information we are all interested in. He not only spoke fine words but he is at this present time doing some much needed work on our school road and is demonstrating that he is our commissioner as well as that of the entire precinct.
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By Harry Austin Clapp
Collegeport, Nov. 3.--Most people when they discuss the subject of a home, vision a building built of lumber, lath, mortar, perhaps of brick or stucco but to my notion a home is something finer. A home in the true sense is where your heart is and therefore my home is now in San Antonio for my heart has been there for almost two weeks and I begin to feel at home. It is quite a change from Collegeport, to be sure, but it is an interesting place, a place of romance, a place where one may dream of the glorious past, of the men at the Alamo, of those who built the missions, of the women who following their men had such a wonderful part in the building of what is now a great empire. I enjoy strolling along the crooked streets, peeping into old doorways, inhaling the odor of strange Mexican redolence, eating the food of the people, chatting with them and I enjoy the modern town to the limit, the pictures, the grand organ at the Auditorium, the service at St. Mark's and to drop into St. Mary's at any hour of the day and sit in the cool church is restful and one feels close to God. I expect this is my last move. Well, anyway, about all I know is what I read in the Beacon and in the last issue I learn that Mr. Regnier and wife are visiting here. Did not know he had a wife but if he has he must keep her locked up for she has never made her public appearance. Ben Mowery and Frank King courting this week and Mrs. Wright a witness on a murder case. John Heisey's cows have been out in the fig orchards from time to time but he has at last found a remedy.
"This little burg ain't laffed so much. For twenty years till now. When John Heisey came to town With a tail light on his cow."
Mary Louise while at home was very helpful in many ways, among them writing many letters for me. She was a good typist and I miss her for--
"My typist is in Aan Antonxzo My trpist's bein awau fpr a weak My typudt us in Swn Antiopio Wgile thse dajm keys play hude and seej.
Oy, brong boyk, bang, bzck, Brun beek mu b'onnie ti mi, ty mr; B(&any b$xk, b-6ng bick, Bjing bozk, m% beeline-o my, oh helk!"
The reader can imagine that it is pretty tough to lose a first class typist. I am writing these lines by the pick and peck system and wonder how the printer will set them up.
Mrs. Emmitt Chiles scratched her hand on some part of the auto, infection set in and the result is that she has a very painful arm. She goes to Palacios each day for treatment. The board of trustees evidently made no error when they engaged Miss Baird for she seems to know how to handle them. Mrs. Conover back on the cannery job. Seth Corse, Frank King, Tom Fulcher all in Bay City on a murder case. Tom Hale went out Sunday night and brought in twelve big flounders which averaged sixteen feet long, maybe it was sixteen inches. Anyway, when dressed they filled a big dish pan. If you doubt this, ask Tom Fulcher.
Have read Dr. Harkey's story of the Markham trades day romp and do not know where they could have employed a better reporter. 'Twas a good tale well told. Nice looking little girl chawing gum and snapping it, one finger in her mouth, a bright scarlet strip or gash where her mouth should be and all signs of intelligence lacking. I say nice looking and I mean that God gave her a fine body and face but she disfigured it with attempt to beautify. A marriage in an auto parked in the street. Wonder why a preacher would be an accessory to such a farce. A word would have awakened the young people to the fact that marriage is a solemn contract. Most people know that it is all this and more. Mr. Eisle laid up with illness. Several men bidding for the mail carrying job. F. R. Brazil tripping to Matagorda to buy oysters for the League supper and Hugo [Kundinger] preparing to make some of that extradelicious oyster soup.
Heavy fogs cover the land and veil the rising sun as if 'twas a bride coming to the altar. At last the sun peeps through and the land of the Collegesports is bright and glorious. These are beautiful days each one making winter shorter. Tractors putting the final touch on fig orchards preparing for the winter laying by. Girl asking for the address of Mary Louise. Guess she wants to send some news. The new store doing a fine business and will also carry feed-stuffs. George Harrison putting in several new culverts which were needed.
Mary Louise writes that she misses Daddy and Mamma and wonder if we miss her and I can do no better than to quote the beautiful lines of John Moultrie:
Girls all busy making paper dresses for the party Saturday night. More of that later for this is only Thursday. The first Collegeport murder case is finished. The murderer got ten years. Pretty cheap life is when one can with an axe cut another's head off. Expect the state needs another farm hand so guess it's all right. This morning I had the pleasure of listening in on a beautiful song fest. About thirty blackbirds perched on the willow tree and it seemed that their only business was to sing and how they sang. It was wonderful. Their throats fairly burst with the efforts and from their bills rippled their song usually ending in a clear, prolonged whistling note. At times they warbled as perfectly as any song bird, but always ending in the whistle. The chorus lasted for at least a half hour until a sudden movement I made sent them into the air. But they will return and I shall again listen to their song. My boarder, E. L. Hall's fine dog Sport can hardly wait until December first and never misses a chance to stand on quail. The other day I found him frozen on two dozen quail perched in an umbrella tree. There he stood like a statue, hardly breathing tail rigid, nose a point, the delicate nostril a quiver, eyes brilliant, hardly giving a sign of life, and I let him stand while I enjoyed the scene and wished I had a camera with me. At last some movement of mine startled the birds and away they flew. Quails do not as a rule take to trees and it was the first time I have observed them doing so. Wish every one would read the editorial in Tuesday's Bay City Tribune. A strong argument against the football game and 'twas timely for in the last two weeks this county has lost two fine boys as result of injuries while playing the game and it is rumored that a third is in a critical condition. Some fussy folks are making a great cry because films of the late prize fight are being shown. They claim the pictures lower standards of moral. Football goes on taking its yearly toll of our best young life but it disturbs not the fussy folks. Seems to me this censor business has gone far enough. A few old fogies and a few old cats tell us what pictures we may look at, what games we may enjoy, what we may eat, what we may drink, smoke or chew. Abajo el censor. As the clock struck mid-day I asked the miserable wretch if she would enjoy some fresh figs for luncheon. She would. I turned poacher on the company preserves and brought in a gallon of choice ones. O, boy! they sure went good with some of that thick Holstein cream sprinkled with imperial pure cane sugar. Well, the new store is operating but don’t see as it is of much benefit for they still hold us up on R. J. R. at ten cents straight. Luxuries like ham, bread, sugar, flour and such things are priced right but a necessity like R. J. R. they simply wring the blood out of us fellows. Hope Pretty Good Murphy gets here soon and delivers us from the oppressor. Bills advertising a revival appears, "Come thou with us and we will do thee good." I certainly believe in Truth in Advertising. The trouble in this world and this burg is too much religion and not enough Christianity. Men and women claiming to be Christians, say mean, nasty things about each other, back-bite, at times refuse to speak. They have gobs of religion but damn little of the spirit of Jesus. The regular meeting of the League come and went and every one filled themselves to the top of their sideboards with oyster soup and went away singing the praises of the official chef, Hugo Kundinger. This may be my last contribution to The Trib for listen, the other day I received a red envelope in the mail. I opened it with fear and trembling but found it was an invitation from Ruth Mowery to attend a Hallowe'en party Saturday night. Of course I feel greatly honored that such a fine young lady would invite me but I hesitate when I think I shall meet goblins, black cats, witches astride a broom stick, spooks, ghosts and all sorts of horrors. Jumping jeminies but I am skeered to go but know that Ruth Mowery will not let any of the hoo-hoos get me.
"What are these So withered, and so wild in their attire; That look not like the inhabitants of the earth. And yet are on't." Macbeth, Act 1, Sc. 2
Matagorda County Tribune, November 4, 1927
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Collegeport, Nov. 2.—Since the birthday of this town, May 25, 1909, its citizens have participated in many enjoyable affairs but none that would excel the party given by Miss Ruth Mowery Saturday night. The Mowery home, which old timers will remember, as the Theo Smith home on the Bay Shore, was elaborately decorated, the color scheme being black and orange. Cunningly concealed electric lights lended aid to the decorations. At the head of the stair stood a life-sized image of a witch astride the usual broom stick. Suspended in the entrance to the large living room was a large pumpkin, eyes aglow, mouth distended and calculated to dispense horrors to the guests. It was a children’s party but Ruth’s generous heart included the fathers and mothers, so about seventy guests were present. Perhaps twenty-five were masked and in costume which varied from simple ones to more elaborate. Among them could be seen a pirate with dagger in belt, a sailor boy, Felix the cat, Mexican, cowboy, clowns a plenty, one tall stately figure in a black ball dress attracted much attention. Little girls dressed in girls’ clothing the identity of each being cleverly concealed. Each guest was called upon to do some stunt and they did, much to the enjoyment of the gathering. We know now how to call Louis Walters, Gus Franzen and Tom Fulcher for their wives illustrated the method. Little Jeramay Brazil danced like a fairy and was awarded first prize while Charlie Giersache took first prize in the senior raisen race. After the program of stunts was over, Ruth Mowery with her assistants distributed hats in which were concealed horns and requested each guest to wear the hat until the refreshments were served. Refreshments were served on plates with a decorated border of Hallowe’en pictures and consisted of a salad, chicken sandwiches, pickles and banana marshmallows. Then pandemonium reigned for with a fonograf , a radio and seventy horns blowing everyone present was aware that the hour of midnight was approaching. Dancing the new day in finished a most delightful evening and the guests went home after thanking their sweet little hostess for the privilege of being her guest. Miss Ruth was a most dainty hostess, busy all the evening looking after the comfort and pleasure of her guests. Out of town guests were Judge F. H. Jones and Miss Margaret McConnell of Bay City, Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Hale and Master Thomas Hale Jr., of Wadsworth.
Matagorda County Tribune, November 4, 1927 |
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It seems that the little town of Collegeport is changing its rusty appearance fast, many of the houses in the town are being remodeled and made into real livable homes again to accommodate the people who are coming in every day, and if they continue coming in as they have in the last few weeks, more homes must be constructed to care for them. Many cotton farmers have already moved in and many more on their way. The Collegeport Industrial League held a special meeting last Thursday night at the Community House and many items of interest were taken up and agreed upon. Several new members were taken in. Mr. and Mrs. Homer Goff and Mr. and Mrs. Mundin left this week for a short visit in the Valley. The following pupils have made a monthly average of ninety or above:--
Jedie Frankie Chiles, 1st Grade.
Palacios Beacon, November 10, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp. Collegeport, Texas.
Guess Doctor Livengood thought a change of air and feed would be good for me so he invited me to take luncheon with the Bay City Rotary Club and so I happened to ride on the Portsmouth Limited with Captain E. L. Hall on the bridge. Fair weather and good sailing until we reached Port Buckeye where we had to dock in order that the south-bound liner might pass. Anyway, I arrived and the luncheon was a dainty affair as any one who knows Mrs. Mayfield may imagine. I enjoyed meeting the good fellows who make up the Rotary Club and if they had half as good a time as I had they certainly received their money's worth. Wanted to tell a story about Jim Lewis but he kept his glass eye on me so that I was afeared to start. Doc Harkey bothered me considerable with his X-Ray eye for I knew he could see how my brain was struggling to produce words for my mouth to utter. Doc Sholars gave me a cordial greeting but when I mentioned that I might be obliged to have another tooth drawn he was very effusive and said, "That's good come up any time and I'll get another dollar." Before he was through he almost kissed me. Well, anyway, "it's always fair weather when good fellows get together" and so it was a mighty pleasant day for yours truly. Saw a picture in the Post-Dispatch of "Mrs. T. H. Eggert, secretary and hardest working member of the Houston Censor Board," and it appears to me that some person should censor the length of her dress. It was extreme in what it lacked and showed pretty well up. She displays nothing to brag about for they are much too fat. O. O. McIntyre says he saw a sign reading "Conchologist." He adds that he did not know what it was and did not care. Here it is Oscar: a Conchologist is "one who studies conchology." If you do not get my meaning, will say that conchology is "the science of Mullusca and of the shells which they form." I feel sure Oscar reads The Tribune daily and he will no doubt thank me for this information. Mr. Jennings of Hotel Palacios taking a trip home via Collegeport so he could see the finest land in Matagorda County. Carey Smith still after the football game and I am with him. Not always, perhaps, but most always Carey is right in his editorials as time has verified so often. Why will girls mutilate what might be sweet lips by a coating of paint of unnatural color? Saw one at the postoffice with a bright scarlet gash where her mouth should be. Ruth Boeker buying stamps her face clean, sweet, wholesome. Ruth does not need dope with which to add to her attractiveness. G. A. Duffy looking after his cattle and Robert Murry going along. L. E. Liggett has not driven his drill into that brewery yet but we hope he does. Sims putting labels on those shining cans and then a carload of figs goes north. Sorry the whistle has blown for the last time. Sounds good along about 1 a. m. About the only progressive sound we have. George Welsby moving into the Van Ness house. Hope he will come to the League after this date. The Bachman store seems to be doing good business but it will never meet with complete success until it sells R. J. R. at three bales for two bits. Duck season is on but mighty few ducks. I mean ducks that fly in the air. Hope the commissioners court will go right ahead with road surveying and building and regardless of what people say build in the most direct route, saving as much money as possible, saving miles of travel for people and serve the greatest number. If this is done no person can honestly find fault. Impossible to build across every man's farm or start at every man's barn lot. What we want is that "nine-foot sidewalk" and we want it damn pronto or if you know what I mean, pretty soon. Bruce Barton writing in The Red Book says, "The visitor is the loveliest fellow in the world when you meet him on the golf links or at home, but his advent into the office is like a plague of seventeen year locusts. He sits and talks while you fidget in your chair and try not to look at the pile of unfinished work on your desk." I called on Doc Harkey in his office and I noticed that he pulled out a drawer and remarked about the mess of unanswered letters. I called on Carey Smith and noticed that he tried to talk with me while reading proof. I wonder it 'tis true. Woman's union meeting Thursday to decide on use of coffee can and some other very important business. Bunch of teachers and pupils going to Bay City to see the film, Ben-Hur. I saw it on the stage at McVicker's Theater, Chicago, when it was first produced with Maud Feeley as Lydia. Wonder where Maud is now?
Mesdames Nelson and Merck are good souls. Saw each of them give a foot-weary walker a lift in their autos. Hugo [Kundinger] collecting a bad account and handing out a big cigar to show his pleasure. Verner Bowers making out bill for the League. Wonder why the Terminal Café is closed? October 31 was a sad day in Newark, N. J., for that was the day the government poured 303,552 gallons of sixteen-year-old ale down the sewer. The United States is certainly a great business machine. They first tax the maker of the ale all he can stand and then confiscate the product and pour it into the sewer. Ask me another fashion question says Sarah Van Rensselar. "My dear Miss Van Renesselar: Could you possibly inform me when skirts will return to a decent length and when underthings will be more than shapeless wisps of silk? Miss P. M." And Sarah says, "Skirts are a decent length now--it has been proved that the present day skirt is highly moral compared with the long, swishy affair of former decades. Why not wear the slipper heel hosiery which slenderizes the ankle--then, you might enjoy the mode more." Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Miss P. M. of Boston. Looks as though Sarah did not like the looks of your dogs and leggies. Many times folks have called me names but none has attached to me such a string as did Carey Smith in Wednesday's Tribune. Looks to me as though the only way to wipe the matter off is swords and pistols at sunrise. This burg is sure having growing pains. Robert Murry has opened a meat market right in town and started off with the finest baby beef I have seen for many a year. Writing about meat markets makes me think a thought. I notice that The Alaskan is still urging people to "Try our home-make pork sausage these cool mornings." I reckon the sausage is all right if Mrs. Cobb had anything to do with its manufacture. Surprising the amount of money our school kids spend for candy. One store reported sales amounting to $11 one day. Seth Corse has been appointed to represent the League on the board of managers of the Community House. It is reported that Tulane University sent an expedition to Guatemala and it discovered a tribe of log worshippers. We have some wooden images in this country. Edward Gibbon says, "All that is human must retrograde if it does not advance." It is true of communities.
The village is full of newcomers, all intent on raising cotton in this great cotton section which last season produced three-fourths of a bale per acre. Gus Franzen planted 30 acres and baled 31 bales and many others did as well. Large attendance at the League meeting Thursday night and good business transacted. Committee appointed to survey the territory and report number of acres to be planted to cotton. May mean the building of a gin. The League also voted to buy a five-burner stove and 60 soup bowls for the Community House. The bowls will not be provided with strainers as many of the members wear strainers.
Of course the Fig Company has not put up a trainload of preserved figs but the season has been pretty good, thank you, considering the age of the trees. Guess Sam Sims will enjoy a rest for he has been a tireless, indefatigable worker. Heard at the postoffice, "ouren is bigger than youren." "lemme have some your gum," "seems as tho they hain't ever any mail in my box" "Mr. Corse, they hain't no mail for us is they?" "That man hain't never done nothin' " "I hain't never goin' to pay for nothin' I don't git." Our dog Sport, a boarder owned by E. L. Hall, sneaked into the meat market Saturday and escaped with a five-pound roast. Saves me lot of money for the next few days. For the benefit of enquiring readers of this column, will report that Buckshot is growing fast and developing into a very intelligent pooch. Carl Boeker selling and shipping German Police dogs. Have always read County Courier with interest and most always I agree with Mrs. Pollard but on this football argument we cross sticks. Her defense of the game is not very strong to my notions and had I the space am egotist enough to think I could pick it to pieces. I have seen bull fights, wrestling matches, prize fights and none of them present such brutality as is seen in most football games. Her argument that people are killed on railways is of no value for we must have railways. As a matter of fact, during the six months just past the railways of American carrying millions of passengers killed two of them. We do not need football and it kills annually a far greater percentage than railways, automobiles, airplanes, bull fights, prize fights, or any other necessity or sport. This county has paid a heavy toll this season in order that some people could witness football. If we owned the debt, it has been paid and for Heaven's sake, let's not incur another debt. Many East Texas farmers looking for places. Will call the attention of my Chicago woman readers that in this string of slum I have tried to forget legs and was successful--almost.
Matagorda County Tribune, November 11, 1927
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Miss Louise Conover, from Illinois, is visiting her mother here for a few days. The Annual Church Bazaar and Supper conducted under the auspices of the Women’s Union of the First Church of Christ [Collegeport], will be held Friday, December 2nd at the Community House. The Bazaar will consist of four booths, viz: Fancy Work, Utility, Parcel Post and Candy booths. All ladies in our community are asked to contribute some article for sale. Supper will be served at six thirty, price thirty-five cents. –By Order of Committee.
Palacios Beacon, November 17, 1927 |
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Nearly all I know, but not quite all, I obtain by reading the Beacon. In the last issue I read that an inn is to be built in Collegeport. This is old stuff for it has been promised for at least four years. The thing that is of interest to me is that it will be of Colonial design and I wonder why people from the North insist on building Colonial houses in this land where we have the Spanish mission style of construction which is adapted to our climate and conditions, much handsomer and besides such buildings tend to keep fresh in our memory the history and romance of the South. We need an inn all right but for the sake of flopping flounders, let’s not drag New England types to the Midcoast, if you get what I mean. Another item recounts the growing of a sweet potato that weighed 5 ½ pounds. The trade has no use for such potatoes and God pity the grower if his crop averages five pounds. With this I’ll drop the Beacon until I need a bit more inspiration. The Beacon is a dandy little paper even if it is printed on the wrong side of the sea. Emmitt Chiles with a truck loaded with shotguns, ammunition and grub. Hope he brings me a goose. By the way it makes me pretty sore to read in The Trib that Carey Smith lives on geese, ducks, turtle soup and no one sends me the makings. Why if Carey Smith should lose my column more than 95 per cent of his subscribers would cancel their reservations. So you duck, geese and turtle shooters come across and supply a little sustenance, maintenance, support, living, subsistence, food, supplies, provisions for the miserable wretch who is my life. If it is done I shall get my share. Thanks to the League, the P. O. did a very comfortable business Monday. When our dog Sport is well behaved he is our’n but when he turns thief and steals meat from the market, he is his’n. There is a word in the Spanish language that to me is wonderful. The word is “Sympatico” and it means something more than sympathy. It means the sense of understanding. When a Spanish speaking person says “el es my simpatico” he expresses something which the English language lacks. Would it not be a great thing if the people of this village, this county could be “muy simpatico?” If they could and would cultivate and acquire a sense of understanding. I believe it would solve most of our troubles just to understand each other. Most of our local troubles come from a lack of understanding, because we are not “simpatico.” It’s a good word to remember. Richard Rowland, writing in Photo Play says, “It was fifteen years before I got acquainted with my mother-in-law, and for more than fifteen years she was a real mother to me plus. She was a good bet and I am glad that I did not overlook it. She died in 1912 and every day I miss her love, her cheery ways, her faith. Everybody will remember that good old Godey’s Lady’s Book, that is all those who are old enough. It its time it was as solid and substantial as any of our modern family magazines but listen to this: “For Imperial Pop take two pounds of chopper raisins, four pounds loaf sugar, two gallons of boiling water. Mix and when cold add two lemons, and two pints of brandy. Soak in a covered vessel for five days, occasionally shaking. Strain and let stand in a cool place It will be fit to drink in ten days.” Fit to drink? Drunken dolphins! Guess it would be. Men rolling Bull Durham. Girls chawing gum. Girl with mended hose, seams on the outside. New boy leaning out of auto window and saying “hello” to passing girls. Terminal Café ought to move to the business center. Dogs sniffing about the market looking for five-pound roasts. New mail carrier in person of E. L. Ash. Three little girls. One with sturdy legs and arms, dull eyes, moddy skin. One drinks milk and eats butter, the other two never. Recess bell rings and children troop to the store and buy candy. Several new women in the burg. Great disappointment of some of us to see the carload of figs go out with Palacios labels. We can’t see why, if the figs were grown here, cultivated here and canned here they should carry Collegeport’s name to the consumer. Poor way to advertise a town. Prairie fires seem to be the rage and one of them caused V. S. Haisley to rage for it destroyed his pasture. Oscar Chapin down Sunday, scraped the town mugs and left the burg a financial wreck. Rev. Connor came over from Palacios Sunday night and preached to the villagers. Bad enough to have our figs go out with Palacios labels but worse to be obliged to get our religion from same source. E. L. Ash was the successful bidder for carrying the mail and will no doubt give quick and reliable service. Mrs. Utsey invited the miserable wretch who is my wife to visit her and promised fried chicken as an inducement. This is notice that I never allow the miserable wretch to go to fried chicken dinners alone, so she better fry two chickens. Buckshot has developed a taste for figs and daily visits the orchard to assess his rations. Shows that the pooch is not only intelligent but has extra good taste. When a pup enjoys figs Northern folks should go plumb crazy over the delectable preserved product that Doc. Van Wormer will spring on Springfield in a few days. We have a girl in our town that is what be called papilionaceous, she is so light, and airy, fairy like, sweet and gracious, face clean, cheeks reflecting health, light in step, active, vivacious. Wish all might be papilionaceous. A large vocabulary is not needed to speak the English language. King James version of the Bible uses only seven thousand two hundred different words. Guess the average man can get along right smart with considerable less. It is said that Mr. D. I. Ogenes used a lantern and searched the world for an honest man. He never needed to search for an honest woman. Too many all about in his own town. What do you think of this? Does it not show nerve or gall? One of the Chicago woman readers has taken the liberty to write the miserable wretch who is my wife and says, “I’d just love to know you and together, you and I should be able to put the miserable wretch with whom you live in his proper place. He’s much too peppy and observing and his remarks in the column—we’ll edit the column and show him the way.” The good Lord knows I have trouble enough keeping the miserable wretch where she belongs but such advice as this make her rankatanky. Guess I’ll have to beat her up one more. They say that a man went to Hugo the other day to have two prescriptions filled. One was for his sick cow and the other for his sick wife. After they were prepared he directed that Hugo mark them so there would be no danger in making a mistake for said he, “I don’t want to kill my cow.” The school kiddies with teachers and parents on a picnic Armistice Day. Wonder how many of our people thought to face the west at the eleventh hour on the eleventh day of the eleventh month. Woman’s Club holding regular monthly meeting with Mrs. Corse and dispatching much business and appointing Mrs. Roy Nelson to represent the club on the board of managers for the Kommunity House. Distributed poppies in remembrance of those who rest in Flanders Fields. I miss Collegeport more every day, but I confess that I am enjoying my life in San Antonio. Went to a Mexican café the other day for dinner and how I reveled in tamales, enchilades, aroz con chili, hueves con chili and adorable tortillas. Tay and a finish with dulce nueces. The real stuff. Of course in Collegeport I could eat Uncle Ollie’s hot tamales but at their best they are only an imitation. Passed a fire station one day just as the equipment rushed out on an alarm. Quite exciting but nothing at all like the good old days when horses added to the thrill. The new Milam Building is a magnificent structure as is also the Medical Arts Building, located on Alamo Plaza. Visited the Alamo and signed my name for the teenth time in the guest book. Enjoyed turning the pages back to gaze at former registrations. Don’t have an auto so Mary Louise and I just stroll about the quaint, crooked streets and window shop. Had tickets to a football game but did not go for am not much interested in such sport, rather see a good prize fight. Met Mrs. Flickwir and Mrs. Law, both old time residents of Blessing. Am going to visit the Buckhorn Saloon some day. Used to go there when one could get a tall cool, schooner of real brew and while absorbing, allow one’s eyes to wander over the greatest collection of horns in the world. Saw the Holman family at St. Mark’s Church. Well, to get back to earth once moer I wonder when Bachman & Son will take a tumble and see that it is good business to sell three bales of R. J. R. for two bits. Cashway found it out long ago. Another thing that bothers me is this custom of letting telephones stand around in the nude. It don’t seem right. Went over to Hugo’s Sunday morning and there was his fone as naked as the day it was born. We ought to put clothes on them. I was shocked and shall ask the board of censors to consider the matter.
Palacios Beacon,
November 18, 1927 |
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Collegeport, Nov. 19.--Collegeport has established commercial relations with Manila. Saturday, a full carload of fig preserves, the finest in this district, was shipped to the Philippine Islands by Sam Sims, manager of the Collegeport Fig Orchards. A full carload of the produce also was shipped to Springfield, Ill.
Daily Tribune, November 22, 1927 & Palacios Beacon,
November 24, 1927 |
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Mr. Arlie Brown left Monday morning for Galveston market with a truck load of Thanksgiving turkeys. Mr. Jack Holsworth is making an extended visit in Chicago. Jack had better come back to the land of sunshine. The Rev. Traverse [Travis], who formerly occupied the Pulpit here gave a very fine sermon Monday evening at the Community Church. Mr. Murry has opened up a Butcher Shop here in the rear of the Bachman Grocery and the people of Collegeport can enjoy both pork and beef. Mr. Murry is open only on Saturdays. Mr. and Mrs. Tom Hale and family are again residents here, Mr. Hale was formerly engineer here on the Missouri Pacific Lines and because of the sudden illness of Mr. Richard, of Houston, Mr. Hale retained the job. The Kings Daughters held their annual meeting at the home of Mrs. E. A. Holsworth, Friday, Nov. 18, to which the families were invited. A delightful Buffet supper was served and a very pleasant evening enjoyed by all. Mrs. Seth W. Corse entertained Thursday Nov. 17 at a bridge luncheon honoring Mrs. S. B. Sims, a luncheon of several courses was served after which the ladies engaged in several lively rubbers of bridge. Mrs. J. R. Wager of Palacios winning first prize, Mrs. Carl Boeker, the booby prize and Mrs. S. B. Sims won the guests prize. Among the out of town guests were Mrs. J. R. Wagner and Mrs. F. A. Sisson of Palacios, Mrs. C. E. Duller and Mrs. Powell of Blessing.
Palacios Beacon, November 24, 1927 |
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Sealed proposals addressed to the Commissioners’ Court of Matagorda County for the furnishing of all necessary materials, labor, and costs for the improvement of a county public road near Collegeport will be received at Bay City, Texas, until 10 o’clock A. M., December 10th, and then publicly opened and read. Description of Proposed Improvement:
Grading Approximately 12 miles; Plans and specifications of the work may be seen for examination, and information obtained at the office of George A. Harrison, County Commissioner, Palacios, Texas, and E. E. Gustafson, County Engineer, Bay City, Texas. Alternate bids will be received on several types for the new structures. A certifies check for five per cent of the amount bid, made payable to County Judge, Arthur Harris, must accompany each proposal. The right is reserved to reject any or all bids.
Palacios Beacon, November 24, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp
Wonder how many of us ever think what part a window has in our lives. What a life we would live without windows. Imagine living in a room without windows. Life would be mighty dull. Any room with windows provides pictures a plenty. As I look from the window as I write I see a picture no painter could possibly produce. The blue sky shades from turquoise at the zenith to a pale gray at the horizon and there it meets the green of the earth. The north wind blows and the grass nods, the trees wave their branches, a long string of geese wing their way to the feeding grounds south, a covey of quail rise in the air and float out of sight, the waters of the bay sparkle in the sunlight, fig trees shedding their last offering of fruit, a man stands leaning on his hoe resting a moment from his labors. All this I see from one window and as I move to other windows more pictures are for me to look at and enjoy. A room with windows needs no wall pictures and any person with just a bit of imagination can see pictures that will never hang on the walls of art galleries. Windows are of much more use than just to let in the light and air and sunshine. It's in the pictures they give us that makes them most valuable. We have some pictures displayed without the use of windows, for example the girl built like this () and then the girl built like this )(. These girls should have sense enough to wear longer skirts. Most of our girls, thank the Lord, are built like this ||, and it may be all right to display such charms.
When I hear men hinting that public officials are all out for graft and that they seek office with small salary for the purpose of grafting it is to disgust. Too often the man who is always crying that the country is full of graft, would be if he could. I like to believe that most of our men are honest, that some of them welcome the opportunity to serve regardless of pay. I like to believe that in this county of Matagorda our County Judge and members of the County Court are honest men and that they will earnestly and honestly handle the road bond issue funds as a sacred trust and that not one penny of graft will ever be traced to their pockets. Some one has said "The most astonishing achievement of the professional snouters is how much crookedness they can discover and how few crooks." Why even suggest that because a man takes the job of handling county funds and work that he is a thief or a grafter is just a thief and nothing more. We have a fine collection of county officials. Let us believe in them, trust them, support them and then let us demand efficient service. We have the right to do that but we have no right to perplex, entangle, embarrass them with suggestions of dishonesty.
To visit the Valley one is impressed with the fact that prosperity dwells therein. They have splendid roads, wonderful orchards, truck fields, flowers, beautiful homes, everything on a gorgeous scale, but at what a price. How do they get by with the almost confiscatory tax that burdens them.
A recent issue of the Mercedes Tribune informs us that assessed valuations of farm lands on the main highways have been doubled. It states that one landowner on the state highway on his 41.7 acres pays in County, State and School Tax in 1927 the sum of $550.56, and another farmer with 41.5 acres pays $549.33 tax. His valuation has been increased from $6,400.00 in 1926 to $14,480.00 in 1927. It is a high price to pay for what they have and I wonder how they manage to make both ends meet. The Commissioners Courts down there raise the valuation and decrease the rate and it listens good until time for paying and then--well, the song is sung in another key.
The norther that struck us Tuesday night sent the mercury way down to 50 and every one is freezing. Our people enjoy seeing a female carry the mail.
Oscar Odd says, "from the tenth story Broadway Building I listed the following noises: a shrill police whistle, a clanging ambulance, building riveting, a calliope, excavation booms, auto horns, a medley of "Extrees!," the rumble of surface cars, the rattle of the L and the toot of liner whistles." Oscar has nothing on muh, for today from the first story of the Homecroft building I listed the following noises: the put put of a boat on the bay, the honk of an auto as it passed, the noise of a saw as men worked on a new culvert, the bark of a dog, the screech of a crane, the heavy exhaust of a tractor, the shout of men driving cattle, the whistle of the Portsmouth Limited as it pulled out for Bay City, the whirring wings of quail, the honk of geese as they drove south, the report of a gun, the bellow of a bull, the song of a black bird, the hum of a mowing machine. All this in a period of ten minutes. O. O. seems to be continually trying to make me think New York is a place where unusual events take place. When he reads this issue of the Tribune he will know that other people enjoy noises. New York has nothing that this burg does not possess. It simply sings in a different key.
Heard at the post office: "I hain't saw him today." "They ain't no mail fur me, is they?" "She hain't so much." "Our'n is bigger than your'n." "I eat too much dinner." "I see him shoot twice." "They ain't no package fur us, is they?" "Gimme two stamped envelopes." "Wonder why that there paper don't come, and so on and so forth ad nauseum. The wonder of it is that many of them are in school, studying grammar.
The Bachman store is doing a splendid business but could easily increase it if they would sell three bales of R. J. R. for two bits.
Gus Franzen is butchering a fine hog.
Mrs. Walter visits the tooth doctor several times per week. Wonder why she quit making that fine yeast.
F. L. Hoffman of Houston, nee Harrisburg, visited the village, planning repairs on his property.
We may look for Doctor Alexander of Peoria, Illinois, about January 1st. He will be interested in growing flower bulbs but will also saw off legs if necessary.
Collegeport nineteen years ago-- "Large herds of cattle are daily roaming our streets and children should not be permitted to go far from home without a protector." "Fresh line of candles at the Collegeport Pharmacy." "Mrs. Theo Smith and daughter, Grace, were in Houston a few days this week." "The Jenny Wren club will meet on Saturday at the home of Anna Van Ness." "The Dena H., the popular launch, took a party of our citizens to Port O'Connor on Wednesday." "Mr. Ben Carey and family took dinner at the Hotel Collegeport Sunday." "The Midcoast Congress will hold its next meeting at Port O'Connor." "Mr. M. F. Bonner is getting ready to build on his lots near Avenue J and Third street." "Col. J. E. Pierce is a guest at Hotel Collegeport." "Mr. A. W. LeCompte is the proud father of a fine 11-pound boy born Sunday." "Mr. and Mrs. Roy Nelson visited at Citrus Grove last Sunday." "A list of our advertisers, Theo Smith & Son, lumber; John T. Price Lumber Co., Thos. M. Clark, groceries; D. H. Morris, groceries; F. D. Everson, drugs; The Ruthven Market, Hotel Collegeport, Avenue Hotel, Collegeport State Bank, Mrs. Lida Williams, millinery; G. A. Lake, contractor; Drott Bros., contractors; J. L. Logan, livery; Payne & Legg, draymen; Liggett & Knight, well drillers; Wm. Pfeiffer, cement contractor; J. B. McCain, notary public; J. H. Adams, books and magazines; Earl Ford, plumber; Abbott Kone, boats and engines." How the burg has shrunk. Good time to begin building again.
Collegeport has gone back "bastante." Just looking through windows of the past. Friday, Sam Sims, manager for the Collegeport Fig Orchards Company, sent a shipment of preserved figs to Manila, P. I. Maybe like sending coals to Newcastle, but I bet my money they will taste good to the consumer.
Robert Murry cutting up a fine hog for the hungry burghers.
Mrs. Ackerman selling fresh green snap beans.
King's Daughters giving their annual feed at Mrs. Holsworth's home on the bay shore.
The advertisement of the new "Q-P" store is a good one in every particular except it does not mention the sale of R. J. R. at three bales for two bits. Looks as though the county stores are in a conspiracy to exact all the traffic will bear. With malt at 38 cents, sugar at 7 cents, yeast at 5 cents, any one can put up fifty bottles of fine home brew for one and one-thirds cents per bottle. Wonder why the Alaskan does not carry an "AD" in the weekly Tribune?
Jim Hale coming back to pull the throttle on the Portsmouth Limited.
Mrs. Cap Allen with a truck load of those famous Matagorda Bay Oysters, some of them nineteen inches long, or about that.
Duffy shipping out two cars of calves and young stuff.
Sir Francis Bacon said: "Suspicions among thoughts are like bats among birds, they ever fly by twilight, certainly they are to be repressed, or at least well guarded; for they cloud the mind, they lose friend, and they check business." Suspicion is the mother of gossip. I know of nothing more abhorrent than a male gossip. We have one or two in this burg. They fatten on suspicion and then retail [retell] the result as a fact. Such men have no regard for the honor or men or the virtue of women. Bacon goes farther and says "Suspicions that the mind of itself gathers are but buzzes; but suspicions that are artificially nourished and put in men's heads by the tales and whisperings of others have stings."
I receive three daily papers, three weekly papers and a big grist of farm and Holstein breed papers but when I want news I have to look in the Beacon, therefore, I say, all I know is what I read in the Beacon. This week I learned that our local church is "The First Church of Christ." I have lived here nineteen years and always supposed it was a community church sponsored by the Presbyterian Church., U. S. A. Shows that one is never too old to accumulate, amass, collect, gather, agglomerate, garner information.
Good News!--The Commissioners Court is advertising for bids on the Collegeport "nine-foot sidewalk." Some of you northern readers ought to write George Harrison, Palacios and thank him.
P. S.--Mrs. Walter is now making that fine yeast, so cheer up you home brew makers.
Matagorda County Tribune, November 25, 1927
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'For love of a little child between us two" Arthur and Ruth Matthes are giving thanks this day for has not Margaret Ruth Matthes arrived from out of the wonder land where God prepares babies? Has she not come to be a pal to the little brother who has been waiting? Seven pounds and eleven ounces of angel. To make Great-Grandmother Shuey's heart full of thanks the baby will bear her name Margaret and that of the sweet mother Ruth. God knows very well that I am thankful for my two fine children Harry B. and Mary Louise. He knows just cuz I told him so. And then my other daughter and my grand-daughter and sister and heaps of other kin. Oh, yes, I am full of thanks this day, for health, shelter, food, raiment, friends and a bit of spending change. The miserable wretch, who is my wife, she has been for many years the star that held me fast, the constant thing that has never failed me. "Most gracious God, by whose knowledge the depths are broken up, and the clouds drop down the dew; we yield thee unfeigned thanks and praise for the return of seed time and harvest, for the increase of the ground and the gathering in of fruits thereof, and for all the other blessings of thy merciful providence bestowed upon this nation and people. And we beseech thee, give us a just sense of these great mercies; such as may appear in our lives by an humble, holy and obedient walking before thee all our days; through Jesus Christ our Lord, to whom, and with thee and the Holy Ghost, be all honor, world without end. Amen."
If Carey Smith would give me all the columns of this issue I could not enumerate all the things we have to be thankful for. Well, anyway, I am thankful that Mrs. Liggett invited me to ride out to Citrus Grove for the annual Thanksgiving dinner. This has been an event for nineteen years, just as the New Year's dinner at Collegeport has been a gathering for the people for the same period. The tables were loaded with chicken, turkey, roast pork and beef, ham, meat loaf, cakes, pies, salads, fruits 'neverything to tempt the gustatorial ability of all those present. Iced tea by the gallon, coffee strong enough to float a ship, but quite as fine a product as if George Braden had made it out of doors on an open fire. I counted 48 autos and estimated that at least 200 people were present. Houston sent its quota in Dr. Fawcett and his wife, Charlotte, and two fine children, and Mrs. Widemeyer. Seven different communities of Matagorda county were represented. It was a great neighborly gathering and was a joy to meet the old timers and renew experiences. It was a day in which to Give Thanks.
A Thanksgiving dinner is not complete without what some people insist on calling pumpkin pie. I always call it punkin. It listens better, means more and it is not such a severe strain on the vocal cords. One of my kinfolks, being very strict in the use of words, insists on asking for pumpkin pie and I, as a rule, ignore the request because I do not understand what she means. Now comes no less an authority than John Kendrick Bangs, who says: "when I hear a man say punkin pie I know that he is a human being." It only proves that I am nearly always right. Whoever heard a child ask mama for pumpkin pie? Well, anyway, we had punkin pie at Citrus Grove Thursday and as a slab was eased into ones facial crack, memories of boyhood days flooded ones heart. My mother always made punkin pie and never made pumpkin pie and I can see them now, pie after pie, brown, rich, rare, tasty and how I longed for the time to cut them. Might as well call turkey fowl.
Some fellow gives out the information that it is just as easy to tell a female's age by looking at her knees as to tell a cows age by the wrinkles on the horns. If this gets out you may see skirts longer, for the woman never lived who delights in exposing her age in the wrinkles. A dimple is worth looking at but wrinkles, Oh, horrors.
Thanksgiving week brought me a new registered Holstein heifer calf. Named it Lechera Thanks Pauline DeKol. Some name.
Jack Holsworth is home from a trip to Chicago.
Abe Martin says, "We'd never know some folks wuz on a vacation if they didn't come back."
With the passing of Colonel Hawley, we lose a gentleman of the old school. Polished, courteous, gallant, well educated; to know him was to love him. One by one, such men cross the river and I wonder if we are breeding others to take their place.
Mr. Batchelder raised a crop of corn in 1926. This spring he planted some of the seed and raised a second crop in 1927 and the last crop was made and harvested in plenty of time for a third crop the same year. No rain on the first, occasional sprinkles on the second. Who will say that this is not a wonderful crop country?
The Japanese say that one can tell if a girl is married or single by looking at her hair. In this country it is impossible to even tell if it’s a girl.
The only cloud in my Thanksgiving way was the fact that I had to pay ten cents straight for a bale of RJR or go without smokes.
It is said that a certain middle-aged lady, on being asked if it was true that she was going to be married, replied, "No, but I am thankful for the rumor." You see everyone has something to be thankful for.
After dinner all adjourned to the school for a game of basket ball between Collegeport and Citrus. The latter won by a score of 11-10. I believe the Collegeport boys would have won the game had they worn more clothes, but they were so near naked that they could give no thought to the game. All wondering what the girls thought of their forms. Cecil has the largest legs, but too beefy to be artistic; Milburn exposes rippling muscles that are lovely to the eye; Verner's legs are long and slim and quite cute, while Dean's are inclined to look like this () but this could be remedied if he would straighten up thus ||, taking in the slack.
Thanksgiving this year has been to me a string of pearls but on the end no cross was hung, only a great big crystal ball. As I looked at the crystal I saw it full of floating clouds, but presently they drifted away, the ball became clear and I saw a bright yellow moon come up and the beautiful turquoise sky filled with stars, each star a blessing during the year. Yes, it was a day on which to Give Thanks.
Matagorda County Tribune, December 2, 1927
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James Gregory, who was accidentally shot in the hip last week is improving. Sie Jackson who broke his collarbone while trying to ride a bucking motorcycle last week is on the way to recovery. James Fuson of Springfield, Ill., is a resident of Collegeport. Mr. Fuson is very much taken up with our new city and expects to make it his home. The Women’s Union gave a Bazaar at the Community House which was a great success. A delicious supper was served and some seventy dollars was taken in. Mr. S. B. Sims picked a fine bunch of bananas last week from a tree which stands in his yard. There were forty-two bananas on the bunch all well developed and with a fine delicious flavor. Luther Reel, who came near losing an eye while attempting to pump up a tire is slowly improving. The accident occurred when Mr. Reel was pumping up the tire and the handle came off and as he went down the end of the plunger struck him in the eye. The Collegeport Industrial League held their monthly meeting at the home of Carl Boeker. The League were the guests of Mrs. Thompson, Mr. Phelps and Mr. Reigner. After the regular business meeting a light lunch was served and a pleasant evening was enjoyed by all.
Palacios Beacon, December 8, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp
Wish I could see an Italian with rings in his ears, turning the handle of an organ and a monkey gathering pennies. A bewiskered foreigner with a dancing bear. Long string of geese honking overhead. Robert Murry buying cows. The Charles Heck family looking the town over. Mrs. Hale wondering if she can attend the next League meeting. Oscar Chapin down for his regular Sunday scrape. The sun rising from a bed of gray clouds.
Looks sleepy--teaching the new calf how to drink; Carey Smith bragging about eating oysters. Mrs. Crane taking in cream; a gray-haired man waiting for the mail; a ten dollar grocery bargain in the show window; a blue garter below the knee; the setting sun red at night; fine looking girl with pearl teeth wearing yellow slicker; a blonde in town; odors of gasoline; fifteen autos parked in front of the P. O.; Sam Sims cleaning the palm trees and parking; girls going to Wadsworth for dancing; RJR still ten cents per bale; fun to watch knees and guess at ages; Ben Mowery sliding by at a forty-mile gait; strange hunters with geese and ducks hanging on auto; Jack Holsworth in the role of a millionaire sitting in his auto; Seth Corse burning up one of our principle buildings; George Welsby going for his mail; Mrs. Cap Allen with load of ice; the State Bankers Association paying for two dead bandits; the miserable wretch going to Sunday School with Mrs. Liggett as teacher; Mary Conover with an all-day sucker; the village tattler still with us; girl with decorated face.
The Seaboard Air Line lost a great administrator and Florida a friend when S. Davies Warfield died.
How horrible. Our good friend, Noah, defines a snob as "a vulgar person who expects to be better, richer, or more fashionable than he really is." He also defines cat as "an animal of unknown origin." Most of the vicious cats are of the female gender.
The eyes of the world are still upon us. At last New York may boast of one thing we do not have, for O. O. reports "curb hansoms with drooping horses." WE got rid of hansoms several years ago and since then have used autos.
We always have the crepe banner with us. Today I spoke thus to five men, "Say, boy, but are we not having beautiful weather?" and four of them replied, "just now, but wait, we will have plenty of nasty days before Spring."
Flapping the crepe is still fashionable. The League is buying soup bowls and the Woman's Club is buying glasses for the community house. I hope the glasses will have a good luck horse shoe in the bottom of each glass. I would not mind a few dog heads, for I simply dote on dog heads on rugs.
Thanks to the hustling of Mrs. Ben R. Mowery, we have fifty Red Cross members.
Wonder if any of you boys consider that every time one meets certain women or girls one sees more of them.
All of us are good sometimes and all of us are bad at times. I don't believe there is a single exception. I know a woman who almost always is sweet, agreeable and lovable and most people think her a wonderful woman, and she is, but given to opportunity, she does say the nastiest, cattiest things. I know men who do the same thing. Wonderful fellows, good pals, generous fellows--one feels one can depend on them, and then in a fit of slipping back they say and do things that are simply nasty. Well, anyway, I wonder who loses all the faults others find.
Went to Blessing Monday, thanks to Seth Corse, and enjoyed meeting about sixty men from all over the county. It was good to take their hand, look into their eyes and hear their voices. Such gatherings are good stuff and even if nothing comes from the meeting. It was a profitable affair. Looks though as if Doc Harkey had stated something that will prove of great worth to Matagorda county. In the Blessing hotel the town has something that is far and wide ahead of any other in the county. Spick and span from front gate to rear, clean as paint and varnish and scrubbing can make it, and the luncheon was dainty and well served. Abel B. Pierce strutted his stuff and posed as host, and, indeed, he was, but every one knew that back behind the curtain was the directing genius in the person of Mrs. Abel.
Back home in Seth Corse's Pierce-Arrow, or maybe it was his Javelin, but anyway it was the breed that "takes you there and brings you back."
Some one has said that "a parasite is the man who walks through a revolving door without doing his share of pushing." When Doc Harkey gets this new door ready for prosperity to enter this county we need no parasites.
Heard at the postoffice: "Ainshea peach?" "Yubetcherlife."
In the Republic of Mexico if you don't draw first, you withdraw.
Have often wondered what a flapper was and just found out. A flapper is a young chicken trying its wings.
Thackeray says: "If fun is good, truth is better, and love is best of all."
I used to be strong for Judge Ben Linsey, but no longer, for his ideas on marriage have disgusted me to the end. He flattens on the putrid publicity he receives and would soon be forgotten if newspapers would only ignore him. I trust that the voters of Denver will never again allow him a seat on the bench. One miserable wretch in my family is enough, abundance, plenty, sufficient.
Collegeport should feel honored. It is receiving some good publicity. If you don't believe it look at the picture of Seth Corse on page three of the December Country Gentleman.
In order to know much I still have to look the Beacon over. Last week it announced that Rev. Traverse spoke here and I wonder if he is related to M. A. Travis who used to be pastor of the local church. Again it related something about a Missouri Pacific engineer named Mr. Richards, of Houston, and I wonder if he is any kin to Richard Hutson who ran the train out of this place until a few weeks back. And it also told me that Tom Hale was now our engineer. Always supposed Tom Hale was teaching the young idea at Wadsworth. I knew Jim Hale when he brought the first train into this place in 1910. Wonder if Jim is any kin to Tom. About all I know is what I read in the Beacon, a good little paper printed in a town across the bay from Collegeport.
The Bureau of Economics of the United States Department of Agriculture gives out many interesting statistics. A recent issue giving index numbers on farm prices reports that taking 100 for a base in 1909, dairy products stood 173 in 1919 and 135 in September, 1927, and all agricultural groups stood 209 in 1919 and 140 September, 1927. It means that the dairyman is now receiving 31 points more for his product than the producer of all other products. The product of the dairy cow has greater purchasing power per dollar than any other farm produce. No wonder farmers are more and more interested in the good old bossy cow. She always has been an anchor to windward.
The Alaskan advertises "Extra-Tasted, Fresh Dresses Poultry." Wonder if some one tastes each bird before it is sold. Don't care for the job.
The League met Wednesday night at the Boeker home and guests of Messrs. Thompson, Phelps and Regnier. The refreshments were d-e-l-i-c-i-o-u-s. Bob said he made the cake, Edward claimed to have whipped the cream and made the coffee, while Adna said he folded the napkins. Wonder which told the truth.
If the Missouri Pacific is called "The Mopac," why not call the Southern Pacific "The Sopac."
For a bit of good stuff read 1 Corinthians 8:1-15.
Jumping Junipers, but December started in with nasty slam, thermometer down to fifty, strong north wind and rain all day with accompanying mud, mud, mud. Please, God, make those County Commissioners get busy on that "nine-foot sidewalk."
Well, anyway, the cold rain saved the lives of many quail for none but the bravest went out this first day of the quail season.
One of our good women met up with a sad accident the other day which produced temporary paralysis. Putting on her "teddies" she put both legs through the same hole and it required some argument to prove that it was not complete paralysis.
Why not declare nominations closed and elect Mrs. Pollard for another term? She has been tried and not found wanting.
Poor time to trade horses.
Who says that prayer is not answered? Ben Mowery now sells RJR three bales for two bits. Took a long time to convert him but at last he is 100 per cent Christian.
Zack Zackers writes, "Here comes Harry Austin Clapp trying to write stuff more rotten than ours." He tells the truth. I have tried but always failed. Anyway, here is a "cracker" for Zack. I enjoy reading his dope. Eat the "cracker" Zack and be content.
Last night the Woman's Union held its annual bazaar or bazar, as you please. Macaulay says that a bazar is a fair for the sale of fancy wares, toys, etc., commonly for a charitable object. Nuff said, except they offered for sale many excellent things and to nourish the inner man supplied some of the famous Matagorda Bay oysters, chili con carne, hot tamales, etc. I do not know what the etc. represented, but it was there. About $85.00 was realized, so it is called a success. Any one wishing the recipe for chili, call on Mrs. Carl Boeker.
Last Monday at Blessing I suggested that the proposed county-wide organization be called "Matagorda County Incorporated." Mr. Royal Farris suggested it be named "The Matagorda County Development Association." Now, incorporated means merging into a concrete mass, while development means the development of an undeveloped state. We do need to merge into a concrete mass and none of us desire to confess that Matagorda county is in an undeveloped state. Why not remember Kipling's saying--"The strength of the pack is the wolf, and the strength of the wolf is the pack."
The norther brought in Mr. Houston from Springfield, also slobbers of ducks and geese, and hunters have secured generous bags. Quail in abundance and several messes have been served. Mr. S. B. Sims, manager of the Collegeport Fig Orchards, shot two of them in his back yard.
"Hunting is the noblest of exercise; Makes men laborious, active, wise, Brings health, and doth the spirits delight It helps the hearing and the sight; It teaches arts that never slip The memory, good horsemanship, Search, sharpness, courage, defense, And chaseth all ill habits hence." --Masques, Ben Johnson
Matagorda County Tribune, December 9, 1927
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The young people of the Community Church will give a play Saturday evening at the Community House. It will be a farce-comedy in three acts. First scene Billy and Mary Abbey, a young married couple, are discovering the truth of that wise saying about married life. “The first hundred years are the hardest.” Billy is out of a job. Mary is impatient of poverty and disgusted with the monotony of married life. Domestic bickering raises the question as to which is the easiest job—keeping house or earning a living in the business world. Each is firmly convinced that his own job is the harder. To prove it, they agree to exchange jobs for a period. Mary, who has been in business, gets her old position back, and Billy stays at home and makes a heroic stab at keeping house. Then the fun begins and moves along fast and furiously, complicated by the secret love affair of Mary’s friend, Sally, by the pranks of a pair of pestiferous children and by the mysterious disappearance of a diamond ring. If you never have had a good laugh before, come and enjoy this play. Everybody invited. Admission 20c and 5c. Mr. and Mrs. S. B. Sims left this week for Houston, Miami, Florida and points in the north. Word was received this week of the death of Richard Houston who passed away Monday, December 12th. Mr. Houston was formerly an engineer here on the Missouri Pacific.
The Bay View School have the following pupils on the
honor roll this month:--
Palacios Beacon, December 15, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp
"O, my offense, it smells to heaven; It hath the primal eldest curse upon't." --Shakespeare.
Last Friday night I received a criticism that might be called sesquipedalian. I was accused of being insolent, insulting, rude, abusive, scurrilous, opprobrious, saucy, impertinent, offensive, contumacious or words to that effect. Or, to make it very plain, if you now what I mean, I was accused of Lese Majeste. Now this is a very serious crime, being no less than treason against the King, and so I must make such poor defense as is in my power. The letter was written from Chicago, by a Chicago reader, who gave no address, so I am forced to reply in this column. My offense seems to be, that in some of these "Thoughts" I called Dr. W. W. Van Wormer, "Doc" and Mr. Samuel B. Sims, "Sim Sams." Gadzooks! a bucket of fish hooks and then some. The only comfort the letter gave me was that part stating "we have enjoyed SOME of your "Thoughts." He goes on to give the history of Dr. Van Wormer, his graduation and that as a medical man and surgeon he stands second to none, and then he takes a personal slam at me and at the same time my mother and uses a line which could not be printed in this religious home paper. He writes, "If Mr. S. B. Sims is half the gentleman you have said he was I think you have been disrespectful to say the least." And then, to add to my distress, he makes a threat that he will take the matter up with the editor. This will now cause Carey to tie a can to me, for one time I wrote about a dog and Carey Smith lost a subscriber and he will take no more chances, so very likely this will be the last time I shall "Thought." The writer says I call Dr. Van Wormer "Doc" as though he were a common horse doctor. We have a horse doctor here in Texas in the person of Dr. Mark Francis, Dean of the School of Veterinary Science of the Texas A. & M. College and his friends lovingly call him "Doc." He has an International reputation as an authority on tick eradication. It may not require as much skill and knowledge to dissect a tick and draw the mouth parts, stomach and intestines out a full two feet and detect and isolate the protozoa that carries tick fever, as to dissect the human body but Doc Francis, the horse doctor, does it. Any M. D. would be proud to sit with Doctor Francis and discuss scientific problems. Dr. W. B. Bizzell, late president of the A. & M. [College] and now president of the University of Oklahoma, smiles when at Rotary luncheons he is called "Bill." How about calling Mr. North Cable "Butch," or Mr. Adna E. Phelps "Red?" Is any disrespect meant? Not on you life, for both these men have earned and hold the respect of all who know them. I will bet Mr. L. a dollar to a cookie that if Dr. Van Wormer attends a Rotary luncheon he is called either Doc or Bill or Walt, and never Doctor William Walter Van Wormer. Rotarians do not respect degrees and titles. They respect the man. I do not yield to Mr. L or any other man in my respect and regard for Dr. Van Wormer or Mr. Samuel B. Sims, but I respect them because they are men, gentlemen, honest and clean, progressive, ready and eager to accomplish. I have known Dr. Van Wormer about fifteen years and during the last few years have had an opportunity to become better acquainted with him and the more I see of him the higher is my respect and regard. He is a real man and regardless of his degree, is worthy of the respect of those who know him. As to Mr. Samuel B. Sims I have known him about three years and he is all I have written of him . He has been a good citizen, a loyal member of the community, ready and eager to aid in all community projects. He is a hard worker and a capable one but when it comes to Always in my Thoughts addressing him as Mr. Samuel B. Sims, well, it's rather hard to Mister a Bird. How about "Old Abe," "Cal," "Al," "Hell and Maria," ”Teddy" and scores of others? Well, anyway, what's in a name? It is only used to index a man.
"Who'er admist the sons Of reason, valor, liberty and virtue, Displays distinguished merit is a noble Of Nature's own creating." Coriolanues, Act III, Sc. 3--J. Thompson
I dismiss Mr. L's argumentum with this: Carey Smith well knows that if "Thoughts" is eliminated he will lose 95 per cent of his subscribers and if Zack's Crackers are no longer fed to the readers he will lose the other 5 per cent, so why worry so long as Ben Mowery will sell three bales of RJR for two-bits?
A. K. Eaton, calling here to look up some more of that superlative selected cream without which Morning Glory can not be made.
Miss Baird buying money orders.
George Welsby trying to keep warm these chilly days.
F. L. Hall and Emmitt Chiles going out after quail. Hope they don't tempt me by bringing quail shot on Sunday. I might fall from grace.
Buckshot chasing a strange dog from the yard.
Carl Boeker buying more supplies for the guests of his hunters' camp.
Mrs. Merrick [Merck?] distributing homemade sausage.
Elizabeth Eisel turning dress maker. If the dress is as sweet as is Elizabeth, it will be a dream.
Mr. L says "the world knows" balance of the line deleted by the censor. Some of the world knows and thinks many nasty things. If it is true that one may know a man by what he eats, how much more true it is that one may now him by what he thinks.
The girl with teeth of pearl still with us.
Congratulations to Mrs. Ben R. Mowery.
Reading the Red Cross roll call we find that Markham has ten members, Blessing 51, Palacios 60, Matagorda 6, while COLLEGEPORT has FIFTY.
Well done thou good and faithful Mrs. Mowery.
Thank the good Lord, Messrs. Hall and Chiles did not tempt me this Sabbath day. My flesh is weak. Shooting up a dollars worth of shells for four ounces of quail meat makes costly eating. Ask E. R. B. about it.
Seth Corse has orders from the United States Post Office to smile each time a patron buys a stamp. I bought thirteen Monday morning and received one sweet grin. He owes me twelve smiles.
Robert Liggett sporting a new handkerchief. Wonder who got the other one.
Heard at the P. O. "No I won't, but I'll git ter go tomorrow." "I hain't had no mail sense yesterday." "He don't come here no more."
Paul Poiret's attack upon the American knee has had no visible effect. At any rate there was no rush by shorts to cover.--The New Yorker.
"When a man has not a good reason for doing a thing, he has one good reason for letting it alone."--Scott
"All over the world There are mothers waiting, Waiting for their children To come home." --Anne Zuker.
The two Boeker boys found a gull on the Bay Shore and on its leg was an aluminum band. They will forward the band to Washington and request when and where the bird was banded.
Last night a girl, taking the tenth grade, came into the post office saying "my hands is froze, my hands is froze." Wonder if they do not teach grammar and good English in our consolidated rural high schools.
The first work of the new country organization should be to sell Matagorda county to those who live here now. We never can sell it to outsiders unless we are sold first. California long ago saw this truth and that is the principal reason why the State has seemed to attractive to folks from all portions of the Union.
Parents ought to read God and the Groceryman by Harold Bell Wright. it is not only a very wholesome tale but discloses some of the reasons for the unrest that seems to exist in the hearts of the young. It is a caustic indictment of the commercialism of churches and the great and unnecessary expense of keeping up 140 denominations. It tells the truth about this situation in mighty plain language. The churches, in the opinion of the writer are far away from Jesus and His teachings, and are at this day business organizations, each striving to keep to the front its particular brand of Christianity. Hope our Board of Censors will pass this book as well as three others I have asked them to place in the library.
The Houston board of censors refused to allow the picture Don Juan by John Barrymore, to be shown and then turned around and told Ben Lindsey to go ahead with his rotten, corrupting dope. The auditorium was packed to the guards and several thousand turned away. Next week a well known Divine of Denver will appear on the same stage and reply and I'll bet dollars to iron washers that there will be plenty of loose room. Squawking geese, but the Houston papers did plant the auger in Ben Lindsey and they did well to do so. The comfort he can take from these editorials can be placed in the shell of a mustard seed and then room for more comforts.
Mr. Samuel B. Sims shooting jack rabbits. They are a menace to the young fig trees.
Mary Louise writes urging us to be sure and vote for Mrs. Pollard. She says Mrs. Pollard is the best Superintendent we ever had and we will take her word for it and vote accordingly. Neither of us would dare to do otherwise after these orders. Anyway, I see little use in turning down efficient officers who have given good service and this applies to all the others and especially the County Court. Why dump Oscar Barber, to me the most lovable fellow on the ticket. He always has a smile and a cheery word that comes from his big optimistic heart. I always was for Oscar and am still and shall give orders to the miserable wretch to vote as I dictate. I see no good reason for changing our precinct commissioner, for George Harrison has given us on this side of the bay splendid service and no double he will hustle the "nine-foot sidewalk" as rapidly as a new man could.
Matagorda County Tribune, December 16, 1927
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In a conversation he had while at the Tribune office, he said that, only recently, 28 farmer families, Texas cotton farmers, had settled at Collegeport for the purpose of growing cotton. Mr. Jenkins is primarily and directly responsible for this influx of new farmers and it is his hope that the professional knocker will turn into an ardent optimist and encourage the new comers, to the end that they will become satisfied, remain here and make prosperous citizens.
The Tribune asked Mr. Jenkins to furnish us with the names of our new citizens so that we can learn to know them. He will do this within a few days.
At El Maton and Midfield new farmers are arriving, as well as throughout the county in smaller numbers.
Matagorda County Tribune,
December 16, 1927 |
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By Harry Austin Clapp
"Without the door let sorrow lie; And if for cold it hap to die, We'll bury it in a Christmas pie, And ever more be merry." --G. Wither
Sometimes it seems to me as though for eleven and a half months we get away from what Christ means to humanity. We forget until the approach of the holiday season and then, presto, we are full of the season and what we think it means. Christmas is an annual church festival in memory of the birth of Jesus Christ. It is the time to chant Christ's Mass, not entirely the time to give and receive gifts.
"Black night behind the tamarisks--the owls begin their chorus. As the conches from the temple scream and bray. With the fruitless years behind us, and the hopeless years before us, Let us honor, oh, my brothers, Christmas Day! Call a truce, then to our labors--let us feast with friends and neighbors, And be merry as the custom of our caste; For if 'faint and forced with laughter,' and if sadness follow after, We are richer by one mocking Christmas past." --Kipling.
There is, it seems to me, a sharp contrast between Jesus as he really was and the Jesus we see in this 20th century. Jesus, humble born of poor parents in the manger of a stable in a poor tavern, the greatest personality the world has ever known. His influence has reached farther, lasted longer, brought more comfort and joy to humanity than that of any other man born of woman. It is right and proper that we make of this festival season joy, gladness, happiness. Fling out the greens, the reds, the flowers, decorate the home and church, rear trees, give gifts and receive them, but let us not measure the day by the value of gifts but rather remember in whose name the day is dedicated. Some times when I see girls and women exhibiting their gifts and only counting the day a success if the gifts are many and costly I think of Indians exhibiting scalps of their enemies and measuring their bravery and prowess by the number shown. This is not the spirit we should show in this season of love and tenderness.
"Whose secret Presence, through Creation's veins, Running Quicksilver-like, eludes your pains; Taking all shapes from Mah to Mahi; and They change and perish all--but He remains. --Omar
Yes, He remains. He is always with us, but in this Christmas tide, we should cling closer to the memory of the Jesus whose example and teachings have wrought such wonders in this old world. I don't like this idea of cutting things short. Why should a man in using the word Christmas in an advertisement use the word "Xmas?" Why not spell it Christmas and give Christ the benefit? Xmas means little while Christmas conveys to us all the great debt we owe to Jesus Christ. Hope C. W. Dickey reads this line. I think he is the only Tribune advertiser who is guilty. For Christ's sake spell it out and give Him the full credit on this birthday season.
The longer I live the gladder I am that "I believe in God the Father Almighty, Maker of Heaven and earth; and in Jesus Christ, his only Son, or Lord, who was conceived by the Holy Ghost, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, dead and buried. He descended into hell; the third day he rose again from the dead; He ascended into heaven, and sittith on the right hand of God the Father Almighty; from there He shall come to judge the quick and the dead. I believe in the Holy Ghost; the Holy Catholic church; the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the Resurrection of the body, and the life everlasting. Amen. Believing this gives us the hope of immortality. Without this hope we are as the beasts of the field, the birds of the air, the flowers, the trees. Come then, let us rejoice and be exceedingly glad this festival season, but let us remember it is in honor of Jesus.
Well, anyway, I hope some one sends me a nice new cob pipe with a slender stem. Have burned so much RJR in my old one that it is about keebush.
Zack Zackers wants to know what I would say if I received a message from my wife "had another child." Well, I would say what the French soldier said.
Those two rascals Hall and Chiles brought me a bunch of quail Sunday, and to keep them from spoiling was compelled much against my religious predictions, preferences, inclination, leaning, desire to dress them and turn them over to the miserable wretch for cooking and "the woman, she did eat."
Barbara Jane will soon enjoy her first Christmas and I bet she will be swamped with gifts, some of which she will first try to chew.
One girl in this burg has received a pre-Christmas gift of a diamond ring. Wonder what it will lead to. Name? Oh, that was deleted by the censor, but will say this: The fellow had an eye for good looks.
Dorothy Crane lolls back in a Chevrolet as though to the manor born.
The most wonderful gift I could receive would be to have MBFE home for these days.
Not much fig news now for the trees have been put to bed for the winter, leaves all gone and they are fast asleep. Next Spring they will waken and put forth their dress of green and bring a bountiful crop.
This burg has lost two valuable men in the persons of Sam Sims and Adna Phelps. I have written enough about Mr. Samuel B. Sims and will only state that I do not believe there is a man in this community who was not fond of him and all regret that he will no longer be one of us. I hope that God will prosper him wherever he goes and in what ever he undertakes.
If disease caused the lips of a girl to become a horrible bright scarlet the doctor would be called. Yet, they make them this way with paint which no doubt is poison. Why?
Auto owners securing the new license plates.
Girls waiting for the mail which Ash brings in a hurry.
Gus Franzen dressing a 300-pound hog.
Mrs. Walter improving day by day.
Jim Hale sporting a new 44-gauge shot gun. Says he bought for the wife.
John Merck with a new dog.
The norther of the 16th brought freezing weather.
Mr. Eisel getting some experience with baby chicks."
Seth Corse improving the P. O. block with paint. Joe Frank is the artist.
That beautiful bird, the quail, so abundant on the town site one month ago, has almost disappeared. Looks as though a bit more protection is needed.
Christmas tide offers the opportunity to show charity, love not only for our families, but for all mankind, and remember the mercies of the past. Peace on Earth and Good Will to all Man should reign.
Saturday night being the Eve of Christ's Mass, the anniversary of the night when the Three Wise Men, following the star, found the Babe and worshipped, is the time when all men, Protestant, Catholic, Greek, Gentile and Jew, may forget creeds and pay reverence to the Son of God, but if they cannot recognize in Him the Son of God they can recognize that in Him the world has been blessed, the brotherhood of man has been strengthened and that He pointed out the way for sinning men to a more intimate relationship with the God whom all revere. It is a day for great thoughts serious thoughts; the day of all days in the year.
In the County Courier I read "An old Roman poet calls it (December) fumosus, or smokey month." Probably because they all smoked RJR at three bales for two bits. Well, whether this is true or not, take consolation that after the 21st the days will become longer.
I hope those who entertain the League next week will serve hot dogs. I know of nothing better than this succulent fruit when properly prepared. It is healing and strengthening. It should be split down the back mind you, and never down the belly. Spread out and a liberal dose of mustard supplied, enclosed in a wrapping of "Krispy Krust" cut thin. It is nourishing, fills the aching void. There is only one thing better than a hotdog and that is two hot dogs.
The Alaskan never sent me a taste of that chicken, but I give notice that I am "down on the farm." Let Carey Smith suck turtle soup, but give me a hunk of Alaskan chicken.
Several years ago I sent a Christmas sentiment to a woman who now lives in Chicago. Had forgotten all about it until she sent me a copy with a sweet letter telling me how she appreciated the sentiment and I am handing it along to the readers of this column, changed a bit to fit the purpose, and here it is:
"Greetings to my readers from Harry Austin Clapp. This is my gift to you on the anniversary of the birth of the Son of Man. To you with life and love, there is not much to give, but I can at least add my love to yours and increase the store in your hearts. I give you from the treasury of Heart's Desire, the appreciation of your happiness and the knowledge that it is not for a day, but for all time. But if it is not in my power to dispense the contents of the treasury that belongs, not to me along, but to all men alike, then I give you the right to choose from my share that which is nearest your ambition. Is it love? Is it life? Is it ambition? Is it happiness? You have them all. There is nothing left for you to choose! Take, therefore, what none other can give but me--my good will and sincere friendship. Greetings then, to my friends, the readers of this column, this Day of Nativity." From your friend, HARRY AUSTIN CLAPP.
Matagorda County Tribune, December 23, 1927
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By Harry Austin Clapp
"Be it with resolution then to fight."--Shakespeare.
Our good friend Noah defines resolution as the act, operation or process of resolving; to determine; decide; conclude; purpose."
Locke says: "Let men resolve to do as they please."
Pretty good advice and such a resolution has little chance to be broken. I am not very strong on resolutions in private life or in public assemblies. Most of them are made with the expectation that they will be discarded, released, freed, unloaded, ejected, put away, made void, rescinded, annulled, or words to that effect, if you know what I mean. Therefore, in this season of resolving we should be chary, cautious, frugal, circumspect in the promises we make. As a usual thing I make many resolutions at this season of the year, but this week it is too cold to resolute. For five days the north wind has blown, for five days the rain has fallen, for five days the temperature has hovered around 32 degrees, so how in the hell can any man make resolutions. Resolve not to drink home brew, bootleg, home-made wine? Forget it. Resolve to be contented, happy, satisfied this Christmas week? How can one do this when the north wind blows at forty miles per hour? One thing I can do and will try and that is to adopt as my daily creed this little verse taken from Labor.
"Let me be a little kinder, Let me be a little blinder To the faults of those about me; Let me praise a little more Let me be when I am weary, Just a little bit more cheery; Let me serve a little better Those that I am striving for.
Let me be a little braver When temptations bid me waver; Let me strive a little harder To be all that I should be; Let me be a little meeker With my brother that is weaker; Let me think more of my neighbor, And a little less of me."
Seems as though this sums up all the resolutions one need make for the coming year, and with God's help I shall endeavor to keep the Creed and be of little more benefit during the year 1928. So, abajo, resolutions. No more for me. I have promised enough, abundance, plenty, sufficiency. I wish I had the ability to say as much in few words as did President Coolidge when he said, "I do not choose to run." It takes seven sheets of copy paper to record this run of slum while one half sheet should be sufficient.
Madame de Sevigne wrote her daughter, "If I had more time I should have written you a shorter letter."
Well, anyway, Zack Zackers remembered me with a Christmas card, but I hardly know how to reply for I do not know whointhehell Zack is except that he manufactures good crackers.
There lives on the Lake Shore in Chicago a woman who for many years has never forgotten me at this season of the year, and yesterday along came the usual greeting and knowing the big, generous heart that sent it, the temperature rose, the sun shone and my heart was filled with joy for 'tis sweet to be remembered.
The Houston papers seem to be very solicitous, anxious, apprehensive, uneasy, concerned, regarding temperature in and around Brownsville, Mercedes, Mission and other Valley sections. Wonder why they never mention that temperatures in Matagorda county are about the same or higher. Perhaps it is because this county is not in the Houston trade territory.
Disraeli once said, "A great thing is a great book, but greater than all is talk of a great man." Read Cracked Crackers by Zack. Sorry he copywrites it.
Had a long letter fro Morning Glory telling me about that butter with the tantalizing teasing taste. It failed to mention that the superlative quality was because they mixed in some of that selected Collegeport cream. I can testify that I used Morning Glory butter at the annual league oyster supper and have used no other since.
When Ash dumped eleven sacks of mail into the postoffice last night, Seth Corse lifted up his voice and loudly cried, Oh, Man!
E. L. Hall training for his Christmas dinner, cuts out his daily BM.
I have received so many holiday greetings that if I replied to five each day it would require thirty days to conclude the job. They come from as far east as Maine and from more than a dozen different states.
Some paper says "Evening gowns are now cut to the heel on one side and to the hip on the other." Better to see one hip than none.
If a dog can bite once without being condemned to death, why can't a girl slip once without condemnation or damnation.
Ruth Elder gets a contract for one hundred days at $1000 per. Not such a bad stunt after all, but high price to pay for a perfectly good husband.
Wish every parent cold read Job or Joy Ride in November Century Magazine by Blanche Bates Creel, written by a mother for mothers.
[We and They]
"Father, Mother and Me, Sister and Auntie say, All the people like us are We, And every one else is They. And they live over the sea, While We live over the way; But would you believe it?-- They look upon We As only a sort of They.
All good people agree, And all good people say, People like Us are We, And everyone else is They, But if you cross over the sea, Instead of over the way, You may end by (think of it) looking on We As only a sort of They." --Kipling
O. O. McIntyre, telling New York stories, relates that when a man asked him the way to a certain hotel he could not tell within five blocks its exact location. When I was living in New York my business took me each day to 52 Broadway and as I left at night for the Manhattan Hotel where I lived it was my custom to stop at a fruit store and buy some apples. In this way I became acquainted with the owner who told me that he and his father had operated a fruit store in the same location for seventy-five years and that neither of them had ever been off Manhattan Island. I good way to become provincial is to swell in a city.
The Bureau of Economics of the U. S. Department of Agriculture releases some crop figures that are a bit startling, astounding, amazing. According to these figures the dairy cow in milk provides 23 per cent of the total agricultural products and her flesh supplies 3 per cent of all meat. Thus the dairy cow in milk and flesh produce 26 per cent of the total products of our farms. Not a bad record for bossy.
Gus Franzen smiles all over this week just cuz his kids are all home. He can also smile just cuz they are his.
School is out, and teachers have flown to other parts, but they will come back so pupils need not worry.
Fun to watch the eager faces of the kiddos waiting for the mail to be distributed and then asking, "Mr. Corse, is they any package for me?" Sometimes Seth shakes his head sadly, for he would enjoy handing a package to all of them.
Was telling a fellow the other day that they laundered the money at the U. S. Treasury, and he wanted me to tell where they hung it to dry. Wonder what he wanted to know that for?
Publus Syrus said: "Good health and good sense are two of life's greatest blessings."
At the Blessing meeting I was nominated to represent this burg on the committee to organize the county-wide movement and had I accepted no doubt would have been placed on the board of directors for the first year, but I felt an impulse, hunch, sensation, fancy that being a member of the board was bound to be a dangerous position. Heeding the aforesaid impulse or hunch I declined and nominated Ben R. Mowery and he was selected. I am sorry I did this for I have no desire to place a good citizen in a dangerous position and hope that he will yet escape. Here is the danger from which I escaped, and without thinking of wrong, placed in the way of Ben R. Mowery. There are nineteen directors and section three of article six says: "Not less than thirty five per cent shall constitute a quorum." Now 35 per cent of nineteen is just 6.65 men. It means some luckless fellow will be cut into two portions and I am praying night and day that Ben R. Mowery will not be the nineteenth man. If they do decide to cut him up I hope he will forgive me for getting him into such a muss.
Well, I have to cut out my friend RJR for a time for Santa Clause brought me a pound of "Half and Half," and a genuine "Eye-tal-ian" Bruyere, not a common briar, understand, but a bruyere pipe, and so "passé" for a time RJR. It's the kind one can suck soup with. Smokers know about it. Oh, yes, I received the cob pipe also and I take turns smoking the cob and the "Eye-tal-ian" with a can of Half and Half and wearing my new smoking jacket, so I am some swell boy this last week of the old year.
The joyous gift was the coming home of Mary Louise. She drifted in on the Portsmouth Limited like a sweet breath of Spring. Face aglow showing health and the joy and happiness of the home coming.
I shall make no resolutions on that I have resolved, but I witness
The Death of the Old Year.
Full knee deep lies the winter snow, And the winter winds are wearily sighing; Toll ye the church bell sad and low, And tread softly and speak low, For the old year lies a-dying,
Old year, you must not die; You came to us so readily, You lived with us so steadily, Old year, you shall not die.
His face is growing sharp and thin, Alas! Out friend is gone; Close up his eyes; tie up his chin; Step from the corpse, and let him in That standeth there alone,
And waiteth at the door There's a new foot on the floor, my friend, And a new face at the door, my friend, A new face at the door." --Tennyson
The Daily Tribune, December 27, 1927
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In so far as new farming blood goes, the Collegeport section of the county has only recently made vast and important strides toward the ultimate settling up of the fertile black land near the coast and the permanent prosperity of that “end of the county.” Just in recent weeks the East Texas counties of Madison, Leon and San Augustine have contributed 24 families to Matagorda county, all of whom will farm cotton near Collegeport. For several years one farmer from East Texas, F. L. Jenkins, has been growing cotton at Collegeport. He had friends at his old home and year after year he would let them know about his crops, and, as he never made a failure, while failures were common with them, they began to take an interest in the black land in Mr. Jenkins’ neighborhood. The facts substantiated the reports and Mr. Jenkins’ former friends and neighbors began to move to new fields near where he had made so many crop successes. Twenty-four families in all have settled there and will grow cotton, corn, stock, poultry and hogs. They are: C. W. Williams, F. H. Blackwell, John Dowell, Grover Dowell, Nelson Maddox and John Baggot and families, all of Madison County. Six families are from Leon county. They are: B. F. Utesy, Sidney Utesy, Bennie Utesy, W. L. Real, Audrey Real and Roma Real. Twelve families come from San Augustine county: C. M. Melvin, M. M. Wells, Coy Ramsey, Arthur Wright, Hurlie, Percivell, V. T. Harvey, Glenn Harvey, Hammon Harvey, Skillen Harvey, Liona Harvey, Blezz and Hillard Harvey. They are all cotton farmers, all good citizens and all more than welcome to the county. The hope of the Tribune is that each will make the success Mr. Jenkins has made. No uneasiness is entertained for that, however, provided they stay with it like Mr. Jenkins has done. This proves what the intelligent effort of one successful man can do for any county.—Bay City Tribune.
Palacios Beacon, December 29, 1927 |
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| Created June 4, 2008 |
Updated June 4, 2008 |